Things you must believe if you want to be a conservative today

[ck4829]

You must believe...

That all those people calling you "idiot" are actually pulling the race card against you

That the reason we're not drilling here in the US is because the environmentalist lobby is actually bigger and more powerful than the oil companies

That Sarah Palin is a wise leader

That John McCain lost because he wasn't conservative enough

That Obama getting millions of more votes than McCain is the result of affirmative action

That Bush was bashed way more than Obama or Clinton were

That the government is trying to control Medicare like it's some sort of federal program

That Joe the Plumber is an expert in whatever subject he talks about

That we'll eventually find the evidence that Obama is not a natural born citizen, the "whitey" tape, and Iraq's weapons of mass destruction

That the media is liberal

That Obama is a fascist socialist and a Christian Muslim

Any more?

[47of74]

1. A few more

Here's a few more:

FOX News is a fair and balanced network, CNN, MSNBC, and ABC are all run by a bunch of far left loons.

Glenn Beck is the voice of reason.

Bill O'Reilly is a great man.

Keith Olbermann is a far left whack job who is destroying his network.

Jesus shares your hatred of the poor and others who do not think or worship the way you do.

[geckosfeet]

2. Come on. Get it right. Obama is a fascist socialist communist fetus eating Christo-Muslim.

[bain_sidhe]

4. The importance of proper punctuation cannot be stressed enough!

You write:

"Obama is a fascist socialist communist fetus eating Christo-Muslim."

But, did you mean that he's a "fascist socialist communist fetus, eating Christo-Muslim" (in which case, the question would be, "eating Christo-Muslim what?" and, how can a fetus eat anything anyway...?) or that he's a "fascist socialist communist fetus-eating Christo-Muslim"? Enquiring minds want to know! :silly:

**edited for coding error!**

[geckosfeet]

9. Mmph. You're correct. The second option is of course the proper one.

[name not needed]

5. .

[BolivarianHero]

6. To be honest, I find Obama much too conservative...

The respect that I have for him stems from the fact that he is more rational than mystical, that he can open his mouth and say something intelligent, and from the fact that the radical right sounds hilarious stupid when they attack him.

[liberal N proud]

3. You forgot...

Obama is not a US Citizen.

[old mark]

7. Earth is 6,000 years old and was "created" in a week as it is today.

Limbaugh, Gingrich, Lott, etc are all great Americans and good people.

mark

[BolivarianHero]

8. you guys are doing better than Athens at least...

Socrates fought truths just as absurd and they killed him for it.