Feminists, do they make better lovers?

[subcomhd]

not flame bait.

[Taverner]

1. Yes

Especially if they took the rule book and threw it out the window

But also because being an equal, you can discuss sexual enjoyment in a detailed and nuanced, manner.

[timeforpeace]

28. A long strident lecture during sex is just the ticket.

[Taverner]

29. No, but simply "what do you like?" is a start...

[Taverner]

30. No, but simply "what do you like?" is a start...

[EFerrari]

42. You don't know very many feminists, do you?

[taterguy]

2. A good lover is someone that shares my fundamental values

So at the risk of being too sensitive I would answer Yes

Besides, my wife makes a lot more money than I do and I couldn't be happier.

[Burma Jones]

3. Some of them do..........

I've certainly preferred them as friends and lovers.......

[armyowalgreens]

4. I find intelligence sexy.

Call me a romantic.

[timeforpeace]

27. Yes, but the topic is feminists, not intelligence.

[Heidi]

33. Feminism and intelligence are not mutually exclusive. (nt)

[armyowalgreens]

46. I'd say they, more often than not, go hand in hand.

[elleng]

5. Don't think so.

I think its somehow a 'skill' unrelated to 'politics,' but thats jmo.

[Mixopterus]

6. I'd prefer a universal gender egalitarian

Like the SO, especially compared to a previous relationship with a self avowed feminist. Gender egalitarians are more apt, in my experience, to frame problems as a human problem instead of sex vs. sex, which can mean less antagonism aimed your way. In my experience, of course.

[otherlander]

11. Sex vs. sex?

*sigh*
What the fuck is this shit?

[redqueen]

13. Yep.

Ain't that some shit?

I've seen that more than a few times recently. Some people really internalized the Rush Limbaugh interpretation of feminism.

[Mixopterus]

14. There is a segment of third wave feminism

That really does buy into a sex vs. sex narrative. That is the "wave" I have main issue with, there is nothing within second or first wave feminism that has this narrative, as it is a recent development likely brought on by the fragmentary nature of the latest wave.

[redqueen]

37. A segment of a segment? So then you must like Paglia.

She also enjoys picking the nastiest fringe elements and pretends that's how all feminists are.

[charlie]

16. Or that idiot Paglia n/t

[Mixopterus]

17. Paglia

Is all over the map, I'm not sure what to make of her.

[charlie]

19. You're hardly alone

Just assume she's a preening idiot, it's close enough.

[redqueen]

36. Excellent point. Paglia's as much of a feminist as Lieberman is a Democrat.

She's mostly just an attention-seeking asshole.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

7. Depends on how young and sexy they are.

[Gwendolyn]

8. Not necessarily. Hot, sensitive/intuitive, passionate, comfortable-in-their-skin...

generous, imaginative and open-minded people tend to make the best lovers. Athletics and stamina can be helpful though.

IMO of course.

[Odin2005]

9. Yes, if my last GF was any indicator!

:evilgrin:

[Nuclear Unicorn]

10. Hold on, I'll put my boyfriend on.

Oh wait, he's busy.

:evilgrin:

j/k of course.

I dunno. I've seen some angry feminists who don't look like they'd be fun at sex or Chuck E Cheese's or even sex at Chuck E Cheese's.

I've also met a fundie chick that bragged about her vigorous sex life with her husband.

Somewhere in between I've come to the conclusion that people are individuals. Silly, I know.

[otherlander]

12. Angry?

Oh, god forbid that people are angry!
:eyes:

[Mixopterus]

15. You have done academic research

On some of the militaristic elements of third wave feminism, right? Some people are simply fringe, regardless of the initial nobility of the movement.

[Gwendolyn]

18. People are allowed to be angry. They just don't seem to attract others. n/t

[Nuclear Unicorn]

32. Serious question:

Do you think that adds to their sense of anger because they may feel isolated and rejected?

I don't think people are supposed to be alone. I think affection is our natural inclination and if that affection is expressed sexually then so be it. It makes me wonder if--for some, and as previously noted, some people are simply fringe regardless--the politics aren't just a vehicle for expressing a personal hurt.

I mean, who here doesn't think Phyllis Schafly couldn't use a hot weekend in the sack releasing her inner dirty-girl? She seems so afraid of strong women she needs to be taught how to demand her man pleasure her for a change. Call it therapy even. Yet, she lashes out at women who are like this as if it would be so bad for her, her husband or their marriage. I'm not saying they have to include third-parties and small furry animals (that reminds me: I have to stop by the pet store before the weekend...j/k!) but where would be the harm between her and her husband? That whole Stepford Wife template is bullcrap.

[Gwendolyn]

48. Yes, I think many times deep hurt manifests itself as anger.

Depression results when that anger is turned inwards. But it usually begins with hurt. I imagine politics is often a very good vehicle for expressing that personal hurt. But then it's a vicious cycle. The more anger one expresses, the more rejection one experiences. That inspires more anger and isolation.

On the other side of the coin, look at how many self-loathing homosexuals and cheaters are drawn to very conservative, traditional values politics. Lol, at Phyllis Schafly. I'm having a tough time envisioning the idea of her and hot weekend together, but anything's possible. :D Maybe she falls into that self-loathing category.

Finding good lovers is a bit of a crap shoot. Intelligence has something to do with it, but really, you can also be dumb as a stone, totally apolitical, and rock in that area.

[Zywiec]

35. +1 (nt)

[otherlander]

44. Do you recognize the difference

between someone being angry at systemic injustices and the biases of those who they have to deal with in day-to-day life, and someone hating you just because you are a certain gender? Your comment seems to have a snide kind of "Well, they can be angry if they want to, but I'll just stand over here not being angry as they alienate themselves." Have you considered that your lack of anger in comparison to other people may be due to differences between what you and they have experienced in life? Have you considered that people, by sidestepping the stream of others' rage at various and removing themseves from it, rather than engaging with it and seeking to understand its source, often wind up contributing to the problem that those who are most affected by various injustices and deserve the most say in the dialogue around uprooting them, often wind up marginalized and ignored?

[Gwendolyn]

47. Of course I recognize the difference. It's apples and oranges.

The first example would be the victim, and the second, the victimizer. I'm not following what it is I'm supposed to take from that.

The OP is about sex. My comment is that visibly angry people are not very often sexually attractive to others. Is my assumption wrong?

[Beer on a stick]

23. I only knock it out w/angry feminists I meet at the Chuckster.

It's more trim than I can handle.

[lumberjack_jeff]

20. Insufficient data points.

Perhaps there's grant funding available to finance a more rigorous study.

[Deja Q]

21. Well, they'll sit on you and then rip you off...

:yoiks:

[cherokeeprogressive]

22. I didn't notice any difference.

:shrug:

[Brooklyns_Finest]

24. Oh my

What a silly question. In my experience, women who love sex and love me are the best lovers. They know what pleases them and enjoy pleasing me.

I have never dated a feminist, so I can't comment on them.

[Name removed]

25. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[cali]

34. too. much. information.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

26. When someone comes up with the true embodiment of a feminist...

....give me a call. I've had a few lovers who considered themselves feminists, who I believe were feminists, who would be snorted at by those who call themselves feminists here.

[Taverner]

31. Thing is Feminism is a broad school of thought

Kind of like saying 'Economist'

There are all flavors and variations

Compare bell hooks with Simone de Bouvier (sp?) and even Camille Paglia (yes she is a feminist, even if she's a little kooky)

[Blue_Tires]

38. IN

[Winterblues]

39. "As compared to what, Charlie"?

:shrug:

[dysfunctional press]

40. the one raging feminist i dated was a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma...

or something to that effect.

she gave great head, and would swallow a load without missing a beat...

however-
she was VERY freaky when it came to her butt, and didn't like getting a rim job, and wouldn't let so much as a finger anywhere near it.

:shrug:

other than that- she was quite the goer.

[otherlander]

41. I love your standards for judging people.

[dysfunctional press]

43. all i did was answer a question.

i didn't judge anyone, nor express any set of 'standards' for doing so...

perhaps you responded to the wrong post?

[TheKentuckian]

45. No noticeable deviation from the general population

I've known a prudish/standoffish stripper or two though.