All the sentences in "dog" that you'll need to know

[HamdenRice]

I was trying to explain to a non-dog person what it's like to be owned by a dog. Part of it is that you speak dog. Dog is a fairly simple language with relatively few sentences. Yeah -- sentences not words, because if you speak dog with your dog, you've probably experienced that dogs have certain set full thoughts they express through barking or gestures that are not words, but fully elaborated sentences.

I think there are many people who will never speak dog. I think you have to have been exposed to dog before the age of 10 to speak dog. As for me, I had an older sister and spoke english with her, but when I was about 7 my parents got a dog for me and my dog became my best friend and younger brother. So I learned dog.

Here are some of the most important phrases in dog. If you have a dog, you've probably heard/seen them many times:

-Will you please feed me? Just give me some food. Feed me, OK?

-Let's play!

-Let's play; I have the ball already!

-Sorry. I know you told me not to, but you weren't looking so I thought it was OK.

-Pet me!!!

-That tasted good! Thanks!

-It's time for my walk!

-It's time for my walk and you don't have my leash. What's up with that???

-You guys are eating. What about me???

-I'm having fun all by myself!

-If you don't want me to shit in the kitchen, it's time to let me out. NOW!!!

-Good Night! Can I cuddle with you before I get in my dog bed?

-Good morning! If you don't want me to shit in the kitchen ... you know the drill.

-I'm not feeling so well. I hate the vet, but can you take me to see him?

-I love you!!!

-Do you love me??? If you do, why aren't you rubbing my belly???

-I'm hungry. Did I mention that???

[phantom power]

1. Here is another one:

Intruders! Oh fuck, there are intruders coming to kill us! Jesus christ, can't you hear them and smell them???

[HamdenRice]

3. Oh, gosh, I forgot the two most important ones that made me want to write this post

-This person is a stranger, maybe he wants to hurt us so I should bite him!

-This person is a stranger, and maybe he'll throw the ball for me to fetch!!

[Lone_Star_Dem]

8. Yeah, and it's funny how they can tell which ones are more likely to be friend of foe.

My dog always had better first impression judgment than I did. There was more than once I wish I'd listened to her after the fact. :)

[Avalux]

2. These are great!

I need to add one though -

"You're home! I know I'm not supposed to jump on you but I missed you so much!"

;-)

[HamdenRice]

4. That's my favorite!!!

[Avalux]

6. I have a little jack russell terrier -

he tries SO HARD to stay down and not jump all over me but he can't do it - his exuberance gets the best of him. :hi:

[Mojorabbit]

18. Not mine!

My king shepherd Rosie is around a hundred lbs now and she is starting to emulate the beagle with the welcome jump. I don't want to land on my ass!

There is also the
Why did Lily(beagle) get to go with Dad somewhere(obedience class) and leave me behind whine, which my doxy is doing at the door right now.

[XemaSab]

7. And the flip side of that:

"Oh PLEASE don't go!" :(

[tridim]

10. That one's easy.. Just teach your dog "I'll be right back"

Eventually they start understanding what that means, and that you're not lying.

My dog sprained her leg a few days ago and I just realized the best command I ever taught her is "Be careful". If she starts using her leg too much I just say "Be careful" and she slows down. Dogs are so freaking smart. :)

[intheflow]

17. Or as my dog says in dog-talk:

You're not taking me with you?!?! WTF!!! Is it me?!?!? WTF???

[Fire1]

5. So true. n/t

[BeatleBoot]

9. "You're Getting Out of the Shower and...

I have your underwear....

Whaddaya gonna do about it?"


Every morning...

[HamdenRice]

20. With me and Teddie, it's only my dirty old underwear I've taken off!!

For some reason (I'm not complaining) he only carries my dirty underwear!

[A HERETIC I AM]

11. A good thread, Hamden. Funny, fun and poignant.

Well done.

[HamdenRice]

27. Thanks!!! nt

[alsame]

12. And also "Wake up now", usually accompanied by

face licking. :)

[HamdenRice]

21. Or weird growning noises!

[janx]

31. Check out this video!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jDRYp3qbh3Y

[Liquorice]

35. Bob is adorable! nt

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

40. That is just too adorable! It makes me long to have a dog again...

[mrdmk]

13. Maybe you dog people can help me out?

Why is it I go to feed the furry #1, my Avatar Image begins to drool?

I really think people are refusing to post after me just for that reason...

Another problem, how do train your dog not to bark at the doorbell on the TV? You will not believe how long I have been working on this one (btw this one is for real).

[HarveyDarkey]

16. Yep, the TeeVee doorbell

They'll never learn, get used to it.

[janx]

32. The more the TV doorbell sounds like your doorbell, the more

likely this is to happen.

[HarveyDarkey]

14. I have the frisbee & you can't have it.

but if you pretend to ignore me, I'll drop it so you can get it & throw it again.

[HamdenRice]

22. ROFL!!!!!!!!

[livetohike]

15. We live in the woods

"Look out there now! There are deer over there!"

"The squirrel is coming down the tree and I know he's going to jump on the bird feeder."

[intheflow]

19. Here's one from my dog whenever a certain song comes on my iPod:

Tuba?! WTF?!

[HamdenRice]

24. What an absolute cutie!!! He looks like my Teddie, only chocolate! nt

[asdjrocky]

23. They also say-

"I love the smell of cheeseburgers on your breath." My dog just told me that.

[HamdenRice]

25. Or fried chicken

It's like, I know you cut up that chicken to fry and there are parts you don't want, like the back. What's up with that??? You holdin' out on me???

[asdjrocky]

26. I really like this post by the way.

It made me smile on a very, very long day.

[Scout]

28. one of my dogs "sings morning songs" ....

he has this growly sing-songy-ish howly noise he makes, mostly in the morning when we are all getting up.

hard to describe, but funny to listen to!

[tavalon]

29. Yep, we had a talker before

My current fella grumbles and groans, but doesn't full on discuss issues. Not that he doesn't make his meaning very well known. He is the smartest dog I've ever had, really. And since I stay in the Poodle breed, I get smart ones so that's saying something.

[intheflow]

30. My dog "sings," too!

His Top 2 (and only) songs are

"You came home again!
I can't belieeeeve it!!
You've got me as your dog!
Now you got to feeeeeeed it"


and


"Walk Talk" (That one's kind of a yippy rap. :rofl:)

[IDemo]

38. Our girl yodels when we walk in the door and "woo woo WOOs" at mealtime

[RagAss]

33. We had a lab when I was a kid who said "waaaater" when she was thirsty.

[Subdivisions]

34. And: Please don't leave me here by myself. Mind if I ride along? n/t

[Bonn1997]

36. Anyone posting in this thread should be including pictures!

Here are my two precious rescue dogs

[TexasObserver]

37. This sure explains why you spend so much time chasing cars.

[Bonn1997]

39. I may be just projecting but...

often Lucky, my timid little 10 1/2 pound dog, will come up to me while I'm sitting on the couch and just stare at me with her huge eyes. I kind of feel like she's saying, "I love you and I want you to play with me, but please be gentle because I get scared easily."