Everything's Wonderful!

[Taverner]

I am so psyched we are going to get HEALTH CARE - I mean, you know the final bill will solve ALL of our problems! It will! I just know it!

And I know we Democrats are going to win election after election! Why, I just know it! Republicans would never try anything fishy - they love America too! They only want the best for us!

And everyone loves our President! Yessir! Even in towns that used to be run by the KKK, they love him and have his picture up on the wall!

None of us who happen to be minorities or GLBT never have to fear if we're in a rural town. Don't you just know out in rural America they just LOVE minorities! Especially if the minorities speak more than one language! They just eat that up down there!

And gay marriage, that is coming round the bend! I'm sure both the Democrats and Republicans have put it off this long because, gosh darn it, they just want to make sure its the fairest bill ever!!

In fact we don't even need to repeal DADT - - our military would never kick someone out of the service just for being gay! Never - they love diversity there in the military! They want all kinds of folks serving our country!!

Our wars are almost over! I'm sure there's only like 1-2 troops left in each country guarding the embassy beause, even though we got all the terrorists, you never can tell!

I'm just going to have another drink of this red punch sitting here and kick back.

A soma a day....