Married live longer, widowed die sooner

[The Straight Story]

Married live longer, widowed die sooner


EAST LANSING, Mich., Dec. 7 (UPI) -- U.S. married couples are living longer, but those widowed are experiencing a higher mortality rate, researchers found.

Hui Liu, a Michigan State University sociologist, said data from as far back as 1858 showed married people generally live longer than the non-married.

"It's a bit surprising to me," Liu said in a statement. "With the improvements in medical technology, it seems all population groups should be healthier and living longer."

Liu analyzed the data of more than a half-million people in the U.S. National Health Interview Survey and found that the overall mortality rate for married people decreased from 1986-2000.

http://www.upi.com/Health_News/2009/12/07/Married-live-longer-widowed-die-sooner/UPI-46331260206044/

[no_hypocrisy]

1. Not in my dad's situation.

Mom passed in 2003. We all grieved and wondered about Dad.

He's 86 now and lives alone, almost militantly. He spends his days fighting with administrators, bureaucrats in both government and small business as he's assumed Mom's "job" of taking care of the house, taxes, checking, repair, etc. He's covered the dining table with mail and bills and other papers. You would never guess he was retired.

OTOH, as far as his emotional needs go, he adopted a little white Tibetan Terrier. She goes everywhere with him; he's never given her commercial dog food; and she can do no wrong.

Dad's never been more on top of his game. Widowerhood hasn't slowed him down a bit. He's getting ready at this moment to drive down to Florida from Jersey.

[zonkers]

4. Your dad sounds cool. i've seen the "table covered with bills" scenario. Is he internet savvy?

[no_hypocrisy]

9. Jesus, he sure is.

He's a foodie, always looking up a new recipe.

And his cooking doesn't suck.

[Tesha]

2. Required joke: "No, it only SEEMS longer!"

(Very happily married, BTW.)

Tesha

[marlakay]

3. My mom divorced my dad when she was 50

He died remarried at 75 and she is going strong at 83 having spent 33 yrs alone happily. She is very independent.

I personally think that is the answer, the people who are dependent and can't live alone die.

[Lorien]

5. Yeah, I think that is what's at the heart of it.

I have friends who go out of their minds if their spouses are gone for two whole days for any reason. They simply can't handle being alone-even if they don't even really like the person they're married to much at all! I grew up a "latchkey kid" who never had much of anyone around except for my dog when I was a kid, so I don't mind being alone much now. It would be nice to have a family, but I sure as hell wouldn't trade being alone for being with the wrong person!

[dugaresa]

7. that is it in a nutshell, folks who are "dependent" can not live without someone running things

you see it more in some men (generally their wives outlast them, this is why i have seen it more with them) because their wives ran the show and they were happy with it. the problem is without the wife the husband basically doesn't know what the hell to do

i have seen it with women too, the husband dies and the woman falls apart because he ran the show.

it some regards it makes sense, opposites do attract.

[joeybee12]

6. Um, eventually one partner is going to be widowed...

unless they die in a car crash...

[KansDem]

8. I would like to see the stats on married/non-married from the last 40 years of so...

Going back to 1858 will show a skewed perception. In farmbelt Kansas going back to only the 1980s, I know many instances of older couples who, when one dies the other follows not too long afterward. It all had to do with "traditional roles" of husband and wife, as these were couples married in the 1930s and 1940s. Often if the husband died first, the widow would be overwhelmed with the bills, house repairs, car maintenance, etc (the "man's responsibilities"), and if the wife died first, the widower would be confronted with cooking, cleaning, laundry, household chores (the "woman's responsibilities").

Now while some widow(ers) handled the transition well, others were left to confront a world alien to them.

More recent stats might reveal widow(er)s living as long as married couples...

[tonysam]

10. BFD. It doesn't mean marriage per se is better for people.

It simply means that if somebody gets sick, there's somebody around to call 911 in case of an emergency. If a person lives alone, God forbid, as a single person, that's less likely to happen. Hence a higher mortality rate.

Also it is true a nagging spouse will be more likely to get the other spouse to get medical attention if it is not a medical emergency.

But this "marriage is better shit" because it is marriage is just that: shit.

[Libertas1776]

11. Widowed die sooner, really?

I had a great aunt whose husband died in the late 1950s. She passed away about a year or two ago at a very ripe old age. I think she was pushing 96. I'd really like to know where they get these stats.

[tonysam]

12. You know something? You find VERY few married people in their nineties.

Almost ALL are widowed, never married, or divorced.

[Libertas1776]

13. very true n/t.