How do you deal with telemarketers?

[NNN0LHI]

I use choice # 2.

[EndersDame]

1. I make up a charactger with a freaky backstory give too much(fake) personal information

[raccoon]

2. Caller ID. Greatest thing since sliced bread. Just don't pick up. nt

[madinmaryland]

5. Same here. I haven't talked to a telemarketer in at least five years!

[connecticut yankee]

8. Me, too

but I'm on a "Do Not Call" list. I don't know why they bother.

Once in a while, one of them gets through, and I do get nasty. I tell them they're violating the law, and hang up.

The problem is, they're probably making minimum wage and it's the only job they can get.

[dugaresa]

22. +1000

[live love laugh]

38. ditto. nt

[GoCubsGo]

57. I love Caller ID!

I signed up for "Do Not Call", but unfortunately, one is still vulnerable to charities, the phone company, and one's bank. Skank of America calls at least once a day. This after I told them not to call me unless there is an issue with my account. Let 'em keep calling. I don't want their damn homeowners warranty or whatever crap they're trying to pawn off on me. Thinking it's time to close my account...

[Dulcinea]

59. Absolutely.

Caller ID rocks! I don't even pick up the phone if it's a number I don't recognize. I still get telemarketers even though I'm on the No Call list.

[dmr]

79. Same here, I don't pick up.

If it's important, they'll leave a message.

[amborin]

143. ditto

[TwilightGardener]

83. Yup.

[tosh]

88. Caller ID combined with Do Not Call list.

I also don't answer ANY calls that display as PRIVATE. If a PRIVATE caller can't be bothered to speak to the recorder, they won't be speaking to anyone here.

[Raine]

139. Yup

I have better things to do with my time than goof around with telemarketers.

[Zoeisright]

144. Yup. But I answer and then hang up immediately.

Otherwise they let it go to the answering machine and we get a series of that annoying telephone beep.

[DainBramaged]

3. String them along and try and get them to contribute to the DNC.....

[Renew Deal]

64. lol

:rofl:

[Craftsman]

4. I ask if they will please hold and put the phone down and walk away.

[TheCowsCameHome]

17. Yup. That works just fine around here.

Wasting their time is fun.

[rurallib]

6. variation of #2

Depends on who they are calling for:
If it is a private business I say no, explain why and give them a chance to hang up.
If it is a republican political call, I usually try to find out who they are calling for and then discuss with them for as long as I can. That keeps them from calling someone else. Plus I usually find that those calling for repugs are poorly paid and often don't support what they are calling for.
If it is a Dem, I politely explain that my money stays local and then I thank them and wish them luck.

I look forward to those republican calls. They are fun.

[ProdigalJunkMail]

7. I place them on hold...

tell them i am really very interested in what they are marketing and then ask them to hang on...i put the phone down...and leave it...

sP

[TexasProgresive]

9. Other

We have caller name and number ID. Calls that come in "Out of area" "Out of area" or "Out of area" with 866 or 877 area codes we go off hook, on hook (basically hanging up).

[Lochloosa]

10. Use these words. "Put me on your Do Not Call List"

Stops them in their tracks.

[Junkdrawer]

115. +1

[SidDithers]

11. Call Display, baby!...

We generally let calls from unknown callers go straight to voice mail. If it's important, we'll call 'em back.

'Course, we might miss out on the odd Free Trip to Florida! once in a while, or perhaps the Free 42" Television! now and then. But our lives are still pretty happy without the alleged freebies :)

Sid

[NNN0LHI]

12. Yea, but just imagine all those new Cadillacs you won and didn't claim

:rofl:

:hi:

[SidDithers]

13. I'm sure they went to other worthy recipients...

:hi:

Sid

[SIMPLYB1980]

14. If they get by my caller ID,

I just hang up on them without saying anything.

[OneTenthofOnePercent]

15. They're usually (and obviously) from India with an uber-american "name"...

Mike, John, Michelle, Ashley... :eyes:
C'mon now people, I can hardly understand your english and you want me to believe your name is "Steve".
LOL, whatever. I call BS. I mean, it's almost insulting.

It's usually about this time I respond (in my best West Virginia accent):
"Aw really? Whad'uh co-incidance! Mah name is Omprakash Raghav Patel."
:rofl:

[Rosa Luxemburg]

16. I am on the 'do not call' list

and if they call again I will report them to the Attorney general's office

[rucky]

18. I cut them off. Even though it seems impolite, it's respectful of their time. n/t

[Brickbat]

19. Other: I usually don't talk to them b/c of caller ID, but if it's political or with a nonprofit I

donate to, or if they catch me unaware, I will politely listen to them do their pitch. I turn it down three times, because that's what it takes sometimes. Usually they're done by then, thank me for my time, and we go on. I worked in telemarketing during college, so I try to at least be polite.

OTOH, if they go past my three denials, or if they're belligerent, or whatever, all bets are off.

[Kingofalldems]

20. I understand a lot these telemarketers are prisoners

calling from the state pen somewhere. And they want my credit card number.

[OneTenthofOnePercent]

21. The worst is when you answer the phone and it startrs ringing (calling a service rep).

Really? REALLY?!?

How f'ing lazy can you guys be. You don't even bother letting your Machines dial it for you anymore.
I answer my phone and then have to wait for someone to pick up and telemarket me.
Oh no you di'ent! - *click*

[Massacure]

23. Sign up for the "Do Not Call" registry.

[AndyA]

24. I interrupt them, tell them I am not interested, and tell them to put my number

on their Do Not Call list. Then I hang up.

I'm not rude unless they are, as I realize they are just doing a job. But when they won't shut up, talk louder to talk over me, or ignore that I am speaking to them, I shout "Put this number on your Do Not Call list and don't call again." Then I hang up.

[msongs]

25. start telling them about religion nt

[dgibby]

26. Caller ID and National Do Not Call List. nt

[ThatsMyBarack]

27. donotcall.gov

;)

[Tracer]

28. There is always a short silence when a telemarketer calls.

If I hear that silence (or occasionally hear other "bull-pen" voices in the background) the phone gets immediately hung up.

[JerseygirlCT]

77. Predictive dialer...

yup. My clue as well. And it almost always results in a hang-up. Unless I've reason to believe it's my spouse attempting to get a call through from an area with spotty coverage!

[VOX]

96. My method, too. You pick up, say "hello," and it's like you're holding a brick, not a phone.

And that's the cue to hang up. :toast:

[NRaleighLiberal]

29. I often as them for their own home number so that I can call them at dinner time and annoy them. NT

[TNDemo]

30. My son told them he couldn't talk to them because we don't have a phone.

They kept asking him if he was sure we didn't have a phone and he said yes, because we're Amish.

[blueamy66]

130. Sweet.

Thanks for the belly laugh!

[TNDemo]

141. We had told him he could say whatever he wanted when they called,

which was usually our dinnertime entertainment. One time they called offering dance lessons and he started sobbing and asked them how they could be so cruel since they knew he was in a wheelchair.

[izquierdista]

31. Speak with a heavy accent

Indian, Chinese, Russian, doesn't matter, just go on and on, "practicing" your English.

[aikoaiko]

32. My friend would ask them to please stay onthe line, then have her yappy dog bark into the receiver..

...until they hung up.

Sometimes she pick up the phone and say, "sorry, please hold on, I'll be right with you", to keep them on the line longer.

[backscatter712]

34. I've heard of people using an airhorn or a loud whistle on telemarketers.

They don't like that... :evilgrin:

[pipi_k]

49. One I've always wanted to try...

have a tape recorder ready to go, and press "play"...what sounds like a huge domestic dispute starts up with lots of yelling (that I would add to) and glass breaking, and maybe a gunshot or two and some bloodcurdling screams.

Someone with a few kids in the house might even be able to stage a RL riot...


:evilgrin:

[NYC Liberal]

122. LOL! Have you watched this YouTube video?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qv3UCvxUh8E

Basically when a telemarketer calls, the guy answers (it's a radio station doing this I believe) and just as the telemarketer asks for a Mr Whoever, the guy pretends to be a detective and tells him that Mr Whoever has been murdered and starts interrogating the telemarketer. "How did you know Mr Whoever?" "I didn't, I just--" "Well then why were you calling his house?" etc.

:D

[backscatter712]

33. I use the do-not-call lists, and I use a cell phone instead of a land-line.

Keeps them at bay rather effectively.

On the event I do get a telemarketing call, I simply cut them off, tell them no and hang up.

[Solly Mack]

35. Haven't had to deal with them for years

[Rabrrrrrr]

36. I have my minions utterly destroy all their blood relatives and wipe their record from history

[PVnRT]

37. There are benefits to not having a land line

I haven't been hit by a telemarketer in years now.

[Katya Mullethov]

39. answer loudly .......HOUSE OF JIHAD

SPEAK INFIDEL !!!

[NNN0LHI]

45. And if it happens to be the FBI on the line straight to Gitmo for you

:hi:

[Katya Mullethov]

76. Up until recently it was " He cant come to the phone "

"He is being questioned by the ATF "

[madokie]

40. I quietly lay the phone down on a pillow so they can still hear sounds that going on

in the room at the time so they may not hang up so quickly so as to waste more of their time. If its an arrogant type caller I may say something like, Hang on man my wifes running around in here naked and I've got to take care of something that just came up, call me back in say maybe about 8 or 10 years.

I'm never ugly to them as a person only as to the job they have

[Hepburn]

41. OTHER:

I politely ask the caller to please wait a second, I am just visiting, and I will get the home owner. Then I put the phone down, walk away and never return.

:evilgrin:

[spanone]

42. let them call once, then block the caller

[Gormy Cuss]

43. I tell them the # is on the National Do Not Call list and then ask for their credit card numbers

to pay for my wasted time.

[spanone]

68. the national 'do not call' list is a j o k e....

[Gormy Cuss]

75. No it isn't -- the volume of calls fell off dramatically within 3 months after we added the number

and we get very few calls even now many years later -- other than the flagrant well known ignorers like "Heather from account services."

[spanone]

94. i've signed up three times with no difference whatsoever in solicitations

i get them daily

[JerseygirlCT]

78. You do know that the do not call list exempts

non-profits and political calls, right?

Most of what I get are non-profits. I understand what they're doing, and why, and I'm in the same business (not using phone solicitations now, though). But I try to grab them before they get too far i their script and ask them to put us on their organization's do not call list. I also explain that we're not phone-responsive... but most don't get that lingo!

I couldn't do what they do - it would be awful. So I try not to be rude. But the pushy ones get the hang-up.

[Gormy Cuss]

87. Yes, and it also exempts companies with an existing business relationship.

Non profits can be told to add your name to their own do-not-call lists and the good ones respect that request. Political fundraising calls and calls from companies claiming an existing business relationship, same deal.

With nonprofs and political fund raisers, I say very clearly that we make no donations as a result of a telephone solicitation.

There's no reason to be rude but telemarketing is a dying profession and I'm more than happy to do anything that I can to help euthanize it.

[pipi_k]

44. A couple of ways....depending on how I feel that day...

I'll not answer the phone

or I'll answer and ask them to hold, then walk away

or I'll give them a few seconds of my Anti Telemarketer Fart Machine. I like that one the best...at least I get a huge laugh out of it. And maybe they do too.

:7

[Tailormyst]

46. I simply hang up.

[proud2BlibKansan]

47. I worked as a telemarketer when I was in college

I talked to less than a handful of people who were rude or seemed to be irritated that I had called. 99% of the people I called were very friendly, wanted to chat and thanked me for calling.

So I rarely believe anyone who claims they got angry with a telemarketer.

[NNN0LHI]

51. Thats kind of my question. Would you consider option # 2 being rude when you did it?

[proud2BlibKansan]

52. No but that hardly ever happened

Most people would listen to the whole spiel and then say "No thanks". Hardly anyone ever hung up on me or interrupted me while I was reading the script. A lot of people asked me to call back.

So this idea that people hate telemarketers is bullshit. At least in my experience.

[SidDithers]

71. Would you have preferred to get through your whole spiel...

and then hear "No Thanks", or would you have wanted to be interrupted, so you didn't have to get through your entire script?

I'm always polite, when I get calls at work, but sometimes feel bad that I've let the caller go on and on before saying "No thanks, have a good day"

Sid

[proud2BlibKansan]

110. Oh I never minded being interrupted and thanked

Very few people did that but they were usually polite.

[dustbunnie]

114. Guess you didn't work in the UK. :-D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Z3fg40XJAU

(warning - graphic)

[Morning Dew]

58. It depends.

I worked as a telemarketer for Fingerhut (years ago) and we used their list of their own customers. People were generally nice and listened to the whole spiel... but these folks already has a relationship with the company.

When I worked selling carpet cleaning - ooooh booyyyy... that was bad, lots of hang ups and berating. Not fun.


I did a multi-year stint as a bill collector as well, Debtors were nicer than the folks I talked to selling carpet cleaning.

[proud2BlibKansan]

61. Most of my calls were cold calls

Not a client base and not people who had asked to be called.

And I hardly ever had a rude person on the other end of the line.

[revolution breeze]

105. Tax collector....

I collected delinquent sales tax for the county I lived in and those people were the absolute worst. We had one lady who owned a formal wear boutique and would always wait to get on the delinquency list, then would make a deal for reduced taxes. When you buy a a pair of pants, you don't get the option of paying the sales tax later. Try explaining to a vendor that they collected it but it was never their money to spend. They acted like they were doing me a favor by coming in to pay their indebtedness.

[blueamy66]

131. What is the demographic of Fingerhut

customers?

:)

[Morning Dew]

133. Well, that was almost 30 years ago.

It was a mail order business ( entirely, I think) and I always assumed the cusotmers were people of modest means.

We'd do the scripted "We're calling some of our preferred customers today to let them know about a special offer we have on these plush bath towels for only blah, blah, blah....

Occasionally, the customer would sya they'd only made one order ever and didn't know why they'd be a preferred customer...

Many seemed to genuinely like the company and were glad to hear about special offers and such. Those were different times, I guess.

I think Finger hut was out of business for a while and then came back.

[JerseygirlCT]

81. When I was in essence overseeing the person who oversaw

our in-house telephone solicitation department (non-profit), we did indeed find that for a significant number of our donors the experience was pleasant. For the best callers, there would be people who would feel insulted if they did not personally call. They'd wait for the call, and enjoyed the conversation. Obviously, that's the way you want it to work. We were fortunate to have a small group of callers with us for years. They got very good at what they did - and saw it as offering people who wanted to support the organization a pleasant opportunity to do so. Pushy doesn't work, and not listening to the person on the other end of the line doesn't work.

But much as I hate to receive the calls myself, (I'm just a very mail-responsive person), I know that it can be quite effective.

I did get a kick out of the people who used to call (back before the no call list) from a chimney cleaning service. They kept trying, though I explained many times that we didn't have a fireplace!

[Posteritatis]

107. Might be different these days; 19/20 'telemarketers' I get are credit/bank fraud types (nt)

[annonymous]

48. I immediately hang up on telemarketing calls in Spanish

I live in an area with a lot of Hispanics who are apparently ignorant of the Do Not Call list. I usually get one or two calls from these telemarketers.

[ipfilter]

50. Ported my "home" number to T-Mobile

VoIP service last year. Now my number appears to the rest of the world as a wireless number and I get no calls whatsoever.

[azmouse]

53. I very, very seldom get telemarketer calls.

I'm on the Do Not Call list. It really works.

[RT Atlanta]

54. Put them on HOLD

When they contact me at work and ask for the office manager or anyone else, I say "sure, let me get them for you - it may take a moment." Many times, I have watched my "hold" button blink for several minutes.

[phasma ex machina]

55. Voice jail. nt

[SoCalDem]

56. I have my phone set on privacy

then I just delete messages from people I don't know:)

phone never even rings:)

[nemo137]

60. Let them finish their first sentence, the "No, thank you. Have a nice day/evening."

A little politeness never hurt anyone, right?

[HopeHoops]

62. I answer "What the fuck, over"? - in Russian.

Then I just keep repeating "I don't speak English" in Russian until they get frustrated and hang up.

[treestar]

80. Not a bad idea

I don't like being mean to them, and this avoids that.

I ask them to send their schpiel in writing, explaining I never buy anything over the phone.

[HopeHoops]

82. I had a really funny one recently. The caller ID was obvious (Direct TV or something).

I answered as usual: "Shto zshe yob, preyom?"

The woman asked for me by name.

"Ya ne goveroo po-angleeskie"

"Excuse me?"

"Ya ne goveroo po-angleeskie"

"Oh, I see. You don't speak English."

"Da"

"Okay, thank you for your time." (click)

The REALLY funny part is that in order for me to have answered "da" to her statement that I don't speak English, I at least would have had to understand it. She didn't seem to notice the irony and I wonder if it hit her at like 3:00 in the morning or something. I hope so. Perhaps then she'll decide to get a respectable job.

[Geoff R. Casavant]

63. Depends on my mood.

Most times I just let voicemail deal with it. But if I've had a bad day and need a pick-me-up, and no pressing business, I have no problem stringing them along.

I once saw a book of telemarketer pranks, my favorite was pretending that you had to convey the conversation to a different person who was hard of hearing. So if the marketer said, "I'm calling from the new AT&T," you would then turn a bit away from the phone and yell "HE SAYS HE'S FROM THE NEW AT&T!," then pause as if listening to someone, then ask the marketer, "how may I help you?" and when the marketer said, "I was wondering what long distance service you currently use," you would turn and shout "HE'S WONDERING WHAT LONG DISTANCE SERVICE WE USE!," and so on until the marketer gets frustrated beyond measure.

[JNelson6563]

98. lolz

:rofl:

[Arkansas Granny]

65. If I don't recognize a number on caller ID at home, I don't answer so I don't

deal with them there. Work is another matter, however, and I just tell them no and hang up. I don't imagine many people take a job doing telemarketing because they enjoy it, but out of necessity. There's no need to get ugly with them.

[EFerrari]

67. Same here. If I don't recognize the name or number, it just goes to voice mail.

If it's important, the caller will leave a message. i feel badly for telemarketers. It must be a really tough job.

[RoadRage]

66. I only have a cell phone..

So I put the number on the do-not-call-registery and then if someone sneaks through I tell them to take me off their list, this is a cell phone and it's costing me money!

[superduperfarleft]

69. I used to be a telemarketer.

It's a shit job that pays surprisingly well to people have little other option. Being rude to them does nothing but make you (in general "you," not the OP) look like an asshole. People who are rude to telemarketers should have to spend a week doing their job.

Some of the responses here remind me of the occasional asshole who will brag about leaving a cart full of crap for a Wal-Mart employee to clean up, and only proves the point of the guy who spent a week calling this place Bourgeois Underground.

[Berry Cool]

70. There's no need or obligation to be polite to telemarketers.

There is no reason to treat them any differently from someone else who is asking for permission into your home. If someone you didn't want in your house was knocking at your door asking to be let in, would you let them in? No. Would you let them in and then spend time telling them why you didn't want them there and why they had to leave? No. So why waste any time doing the same to telemarketers?

Pranking them is also a waste of time. You might as well get an old record album cover, fill it with shaving cream, then slide the end under your front door and stomp on it to prank someone who's standing outside the door of your house. Hah hah ha, real funny...Why waste the time? Just don't answer the door.

If you answer a telemarketing call by accident, hanging up is all you need to do. You're under no obligation to listen for one second, any more than politeness demands that you let strangers into your home for five minutes just because they knocked on your door. They're not "just doing a job." They're invading your privacy. You're under no obligation to feel sorry for them just because maybe they can't get another job, any more than you are obligated to have pity on a burglar because maybe he's only stealing because he's out of work. Just hang up.

[AngryAmish]

72. I interrupt them and ask them what they are wearing, if they are wearing underwear, etc

It is not an illegal obscene phone call if they called me.

[City Lights]

73. I answer, say no, and asked to be removed from their call list. nt

[liskddksil]

74. Being rude to people making 7 bucks an hour ... real progressive thing to do

[whistler162]

84. The same way I do polls!

hide the thread.

BYE

[Lisa0825]

85. No land line. No telemarketers on my cell. nt

[Stevenmarc]

86. There's this thing called Caller ID, I don't pick up any call I don't know.

[rationalcalgarian]

89. I have caller ID....

... so if a number appears that I don't recognize, it doesn't get answered. However, I have a recurring telemarketer trying to get me to subscribe to one of the local newspapers so, if I'm in the mood, I will answer and then... talk... very... slowly.... Or I will say that I agree it's a great idea, hold on while I get my credit card, then put down the phone and go back to watching TV or whatever I was doing. Anything to waste their time.

I hope the poor schmucks making these calls are getting paid by the hour. It's a crappy job, working for crappy people trying to sell crappy merchandise. That's why I don't yell at them or abuse them; their lives are already bad enough.

[HughMoran]

90. a) do not call list b) don't answer home phone - screen all calls

What's a "telemarketer"? :rofl:

[Gman2]

91. Same thing I tell prostitutes to make them leave me alone. I'm poor!

[Ohio Joe]

92. Other - I don't

I've not had a call from a telemarketer in years.

[Fire1]

93. Caller ID works wonders. n/t

[revolution breeze]

95. As a former telemarketer....

I usually take the time to listen if the can catch my attention in the first 15 seconds of the call. If it something I do not agree with or know I am definitely not interested in, I will politely end the call. When I was a telemarketer (hey, I was a young single mother of a child with diabetes and no insurance), we were paid per call and a bonuses for each sale we made. If we knew we were not going to make a sale, we thanked the person for their time and moved on. If we did not make our quote of 45 calls per hour, we got written up and yes, you could get written up multiple times per shift. No wonder they could not keep anyone for more than two weeks.

[DFW]

97. I have two preferred methods

If I'm tired and have no wish to play, I speak to the odffending party in Swedish or Catalan, or some language they are not likely to know.

If I4m up to it, I interrupt them and ask for their name and home phone number. That usually prompys a "why?" I answer, "so that I can call you at inopportune times at your residence and annoy you with offers you don't want to hear." That usually ends the discussion.

The most offensive one was when my father had just died. I mean like my mom and I had just held his hands while he took his last breath. Not three minutes later, the phone rang and some telemarketer called and asked to speak to my father. Doing my level best to not blow up, I explained that they should have called an hour ago, as he had just died less than five minutes ago, and was there anything else of pressing importance they had to say? (there wasn't)

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

99. Answering machines are one of the most beneficial inventions of the 20th century.

[ipaint]

100. Use email. Got rid of phone. n/t

[annabanana]

101. I get them off script

I interrupt them and ask them who they're calling from, and I say "We don't have an account with you." Then I barrage them with a bunch of very specific questions and they ALL get rattled. (poor things... I know they get paid shit to cold call)

[superduperfarleft]

108. Then why do you go out of your way to make their day even worse? n/t

[Mad_Dem_X]

102. I just say, "No thank you" and hang up.

No reason to waste any time messing with them; just hang up.

[Javaman]

103. I used to get mad but now I try a completely different tact...

I let them do their pre written schpeel. Then I say, "look I know this is your job, it's probably not a great job, but it's your job and you are doing your best. You have bills to pay, maybe someone to support or whatever and I really appreciate that. These days, one has to be thankful for a job, any job. But sadly, I'm really not interested and please remove me from your list. Have a good day".

I have it written down by my phone. LOL

battle prewritten schpeel with prewritten schpeel.

:)

[Swamp Rat]

104. A few simple steps:

1. When answering the telephone say, "Ez eskerrik anitx" = 'No thank you' in Basque.

2. Wait for response:

a. If no response:

3a. Say, "Gero arte" = 'Goodbye' in Basque, then hang up.

b. If the telemarketer keeps talking:

3b. Cut off their speech by saying, "ez dut ulertzen" = 'I don't understand' in Basque, followed by "Gero arte," then hang up.

Good alternative languages: Cherokee, Cree, Hopi, Mixtec, Navajo, and Ojibwe.

:)

:hi: Yá'át'ééh shitsóí :D

[Kansas Wyatt]

106. Call screening, then block their numbers.

[donco6]

109. No call list and caller ID

I don't pick them up.

[TK421]

111. Cut them off in mid-sentence....this usually works

and if they continue to ramble on, I just say I'm not interested thanks and hang up.

doesn't stop them from calling in the future, though....I realize these people have shitty jobs and are used to rejections

[L0oniX]

112. "Get a real job ...loser".

[CTyankee]

113. I tell them about all my problems, my health issues, my husband's health issues, my grandchildren

andhow smart they are and my hobbies and my friends and their problems and my difficulties in the parking lot at the supermarket and my fight with with pharmacist...

they get the message...

[Matariki]

116. My number is on the Do Not Call Registry

https://www.donotcall.gov/

I ask them their company name and where they are calling from and tell them my number is listed with the Do Not Call Registry, and they almost always hang up on me.

[varelse]

117. Other - in my household, we screen all calls

we let the answering machine get all calls - there is no greeting recorded. Our friends, co-workers and family know to start talking to the machine, at which point one of us will pick up. Messages left by telemarketers, canvassers, etc are just deleted.

[Omaha Steve]

118. I was an outbound telemarketer for almost 2 years

It was after I hurt my back. I couldn't find work as a truck driver. I couldn't lift. And nobody wants to hire a driver that can't load or unload his truck in an emergency etc.

I know this is how they get a check. I've been there. I usually listen and politely end the call. I did have one DEMOCRATIC group raising funds a few weeks ago cross a line. I said "that's it" and hung up the phone.

[Samantha]

119. I have my calls on broadcast and don't pick up unless the voice

is a friend or family. I have done this since 1992. So my land line screens these calls for me, and if someone really wants to talk to me (like a friend) they call on the cell. Works great.

Sam

[951-Riverside]

120. Make an obscene comment and don't hang up

...Older southern baptist male telemarketers will get a kick out of it ...trust me. :D

[yawnmaster]

121. Caller ID. If occasionally, I accidentally pick up. a "no thank you" and a hang up. eom

[johnaries]

123. Well, since my last name starts with A and I was getting a ridiculous

number of phone solicitor calls prior to the "do not call" list, I took some drastic measures.

I cued up Stravinsky's "Symphony of Psalms" to one of the passages that was basically stolen by the composer for the Damien movies, with the volume turned way up. If you are not familiar with the "Symphony of Psalms", you should check it out. Real "Wrath of God" music that will raise the hairs on the back of your neck and have you calling for an exorcist immediately.

So, with the appropriate passage cued up, I recorded a new greeting on my answering machine:

*beep* *nice and friendly voice* Hello! This is John! If you are a friend of mine, please leave a message so I can call you back. If you are someone trying to sell me something *begin playing "devilish" music in background* *change to "evil voice"* HANG UP NOW, BEFORE I PLACE A CURSE ON YOU, YOUR CHILDREN, AND ALL OF YOUR DESCENDENTS! *beep*

It was amazing how effective this was. The number of messages left on my answering machine went way down! Although I did get one message that simply said "I'm sorry! Please don't curse me! I'm sorry! Please don't curse me!"

I saved that message and listened to it over and over. :)

[HuckleB]

124. I simply tell them that I am giving them an unrec.

[Stinky The Clown]

125. I try to date them

But some live too far away to bother.

[Roon]

126. Whenever I get a call from some place I don't like...

Telemarketers or bill collectors I just put the little red button. That usually shuts them up for a couple of weeks.

[Xicano]

127. Ring, ring, ring.....

"Hello"

"Hello I am"

CLICK!

[flvegan]

128. I let them finish their initial pitch, then say "No thank you, good bye."

I see no need to be rude or ugly to people trying to make a living. If I can screen them via the caller ID, I will do that and not answer at all.

[blueamy66]

129. Um, I keep my land line connected to my fax

machine and never answer it.

Problem solved.

on edit....I keep the fax machine ringer at mute.

[Iggo]

132. Right in the middle of their first sentence....

...I say "No thanks" while hanging up the phone.

No different than those cute chicks who approach me at the mall wanting to wrap that thing around my neck, or those salescreeps at the cell phone kiosks. A slightly pained smile and a curt "No thanks" right in the middle of their first sentence.

[FunkyLeprechaun]

134. I am deaf

but I used to get telemarketing calls directed towards me all the time. My mum used to answer the phone in this fashion-

Caller- Hello, can we speak to FunkyLeprechaun?
Mum- You can't speak to her, she's deaf. Can I take your message?
Caller- We can't do that, we have to speak to FunkyLeprechaun.
Mum- What part of "deaf" can't you understand?
Caller- We'll call back again. (hangs up)

And they did this for two weeks. My mum was about to murder the phone by the time the calls stopped. They called about three times a day as well!!! When I was at university, I used to get telemarketing calls and I can hear somewhat with my CI and the only person that I can understand quite well on the phone is my mother. So if I get "sounds like gibberish" on the phone and not my mother's voice, I tell them that I am deaf and I can't hear them very well... they usually hung up and left me alone. One time they tried to make an effort and slowly spoke to me before giving up.

[Touchdown]

135. I sexually harass them.

TM:Doesn't that sound like a great deal Mr. Touchdown?
Me:I bet you're not wearing a bra.
TM: Well! That's highly inappropriate!
Me: Hey Babe! You called me. What did you expect? So what color are your panties?

For men too...
TM: ...So we can get you into this new plan that will help you save on your monthly energy bill!
Me: You got a nice voice. I'm all stiff now. Talk some more about my... power.
TM: Uhhh...*click*

:evilgrin:

MCI probably had a big file on me back when they were their own company.

One time an MCI lady played along too well, so I had to escalate to body fluids to get her to hang up.

[LeftyMom]

136. I have a cell phone. If I get a number I don't recognize I let it go to voice mail.

On the rare occasion that I'm expecting an important call and get a telemarketer instead when I pick up I wait for them to take a breath, ask them to remove me from their list and not call again, and hang up. I don't yell, it's not the kid on the phone who makes the decisions.

But if they're rude or call repeatedly I start answering the phone and either saying that I can't hear them and to please speak up over and over until they give up, or insisting that I don't speak any English and babbling in German until they give up. But that's rare, I only have to do one or the other maybe twice a year, usually when some asshole bill collector is calling for somebody who had my phone number before or something.

[DRoseDARs]

137. Phone spiders...

http://www.livevideo.com/video/3D1C508CD583435287C72C8422718E7C/send-the-phone-spiders.aspx

[Raine]

138. 100% effective ... I don't answer the phone

unless I know the person calling. :-) If everyone did it that way none of us would be burdened with telemarketers, they would be out of business! :think:

[struggle4progress]

140. Who is this again? Gretchen? Oh, Gretchen! Hi, Gretchen! Where are you calling from? Where?

Acme? Is that still in Minnesota? Is it snowing there? It's snowing here. What's the weather like there? It's what? I said it's snowing here. I'm afraid to let the dogs out. Do you have dogs? What? I said, do you have dogs? No? Why not? Don't you like dogs? You should get a dog ...

[Generic Brad]

142. That "Do Not Call" list does work

I have never received a telemarketing call on my cell and I have owned it for more than four years.