I was a PGA 'golf mistress' (girlfriend?) from 1987-1992

[Ruby the Liberal]

(Mods, please move where appropriate).

I met my PGA guy while working as a bartender while in college. He was NOT married, and had no children at the time.

Those of us who have been there can tell you that extreme sexual activity is VERY prevalent on tour. We are talking golf geeks here. Flying out the GF for the weekend is not uncommon, especially with little notice on Fridays once the cut has been named (the final field for the last 2 days of a 4 day tourney).

Football plays, what, 9 games a season away from home, 2 days away each time? Golf - it is 45+ weeks/year, Tuesday travel to, Monday travel from/to.

My relationship was not a secret (I was photographed with the ex in SI 2x), and I got to know a lot of PGA men/wives/caddies, some of who I am still in touch with. My ex married in the mid 1990s, years after we lost touch. While I know of no other 'girlfriends', I have no illusions that I was the only one. Nature of the game as I knew it then.

Golf being the respectable/boring "white guy game" was shattered as a myth when Tiger took the field like a storm in the late 90s.

Now the myth is shattered again by something those of us who have been inside have known for eons. While my guy was 'on the level' (not married) and I wasn't a hidden/alias-wielding 'mistress', I was one of many. Some I would see every few tournaments, some once a year at the same locations. I was always brought up to speed by fellow players or my guy as to who was 'in town this weekend'.

I write this not to disparage anyone (or the sport), but while musicians, actors, pilots (name your port-in-a-storm profession) are given a pass, I am just surprised that this particular trait of the tour is just now coming out and in this manner.

It is like a perfect storm that most never saw coming (because they didn't want to see tarnish on their 'elite' sport), and for those of us who knew, it was just not something you talked about.

My prayers go out to Elin and the kids. She was in this scene longer (and more indepth) than I ever was and this must have come as a shock to her as she no doubt knows the score - just never saw it coming in her own marriage.

[dkf]

1. Hmm I never knew.

Very interesting and eye opening.

[Ruby the Liberal]

3. Tiger's women coming out like someone kicked an anthill is the tip of the iceberg

(if I may mix metaphors).

Some things are better left unsaid.

Many of these guys play well into their 60s. That is a long career to cover mistakes with the $media$ on the hunt. :(

[apocalypsehow]

2. Wish you'd told me this 30 years ago so I'd joined the HS Golf team, instead of the Jr. Varsity...

...just sayin'.

[Ruby the Liberal]

6. HS football players = yesterday's news

Getting your pics in SI with a golf nerd who applied himself?

:toast:

Never cease trying to figure out women. We make more sense as we age, but it is a process. :D

[apocalypsehow]

16. *Sigh*...all those sweat-exhausted Two-a-Days for nuttin'. Well, the Keg Parties were cool, anyway.

:beer:

And I always got the invite to be the informal "bouncer" along with the rest of the linebacker crew, so there's that at least.

:toast:

[Ruby the Liberal]

19. I'll trade your memories for mine

:D

[madokie]

31. LOL, no kidding

[inna]

4. Mods, please do NOT move and leave this thread in GD.

KR, thanks for insights.

[timeforpeace]

5. Is that it? I was assuming she was going to make some point.

[Ruby the Liberal]

7. You are right -- I didn't make a point clear.

It was that this profession has been given a pass, and it shouldn't have. I am sad (but not surprised) that the lid has blown off the 'prestigious' game and its participants.

[Joe Chi Minh]

32. It confirms my impression that they are mostly spoiled brats. 'Respectability' is

of the essence in the higher reaches of power and wealth.

It's a truism that knowledge is power, at least in a general sense, isn't it? And one of the perks of the wealthy and powerful, it seems, is the power to have things kept secret.

Tiger's demeanour on the course was so different from what it was off the course, I'm sure most people unfamiliar with the golfing world would have been surprise to learn about the latter. Elin, herself, initially, I expect. He shows such strength of character on the golf-course.

I expect the single-minded attitude to golf that has made Tiger one of golfing's Greats puts the balance of our human nature out of kilter; a form of idolatry, an excessive personal subjection to a particular, professional discipline of some kind. Others resort to booze or drugs. It evidently afflicts a lot of businessmen, particularly, I expect, if they have to travel a lot, living out of a suitcase. They need to anesthetize their brain and seek comfort for the affective side of their nature. But his adultery just gives me the impression that he's been led astray by the pro golf culture, and has been indulging what all men and apparently women would like to do on a very carnal level with every member of the opposite sex (at least, in principle) they find attractive.

I don't know if Tiger has religious faith, but if he has, with God's grace, and with such a loyal and loving wife, I get the impression that, potentially, at least, he has more than enough strength to grow up fast and permanently in that regard. He does seem to prize his family above all else, as he says, and that too speaks of wisdom and decency, doesn't it? I expect we all hope so, anyway.

If he is wise enough to prioritize his love for his wife and family, I wouldn't be surprised if his game deteriorated a little. But the Golden Bear, and some of the Greats who at least seemed to be good family men seemed to cope, and maybe that family security improved their game. But he's made more than enough money to retire in great comfort, so I hope he doesn't listen to the siren voices of the media, and prioritize breaking records and chasing ultimately empty shadows. He may need to cultivate other interests, read more, take up a hobby, etc.

[sudopod]

30. Is that it?

I had assumed that you'd eventually get banned for being a consistent asshole.

[HipChick]

8. Thank you for posting this.. well aware of this 'other' side of golf for sometime..

[Frances]

9. I have a friend with family in Nascar

She said there are many groupies. Why hasn't the media explored the misdeeds of someone in that sport?

Was it because of Tiger Woods' accident that there is so much focus on him? Or because he and Obama both are part African or African-American? I would guess that this scandal about Tiger Woods has sent Obama's disapproval rating up.

[HipChick]

17. What exactly does it have to do with Obama?

Pathetic..

[bullwinkle428]

10. As someone that's followed the pro golf scene for many years

and have been attending tournaments in person, frequently, since the early 1990s, I have to say that I don't find this surprising in the least!!

[Ruby the Liberal]

14. You can spot the bunnies...

[itsrobert]

11. So you and the Golfer were fucking and both unmarried?

And you post this why?

[Ruby the Liberal]

15. Way to misread.

I spent years in this scene. I was also living with a musician in the mid 1980s. I'll trust band fidelity over PGA fidelity any day, yet the former gets the bad rap. The latter is just about to see the media lid pulled back.

[paranoid floyd]

18. Self Delete

[jaysunb]

12. As to Elin

I doubt she was unaware of the dalliances. (Europeans seem to have a much different perspective on love and marriage) which is why I suspect it may have more to do with, where (in their home ?) and attachment. ( one thing to have a fling, but more than three times is an "affair." Big no no on both sides of the pond.

Too much money and ego involved here for what the public knows to be anywhere near the real problem Mrs Woods has with Tigers behavior.

[Ruby the Liberal]

21. You underestimate how tight this club is

I have never met Elin, and will not assume her knowledge about or take on this. I am just sharing my insight to the tour as one who lived it.

You have no idea how many times I have faced wives knowing what I knew and had to turn away for fear they could read my face.

[upi402]

13. Yep, not a surprise and NOT NEWSWORTHY!

TV News is a distraction from real issues (except MSNBC!):grr:

[Captain Hilts]

20. Lee Elder, Chi Chi Rodriquez and Jim Dent were black golfers before Woods. nt

[Ruby the Liberal]

22. I met Chi Chi before Tiger was out of braces

Warm and friendly gentleman! :D

Didn't mean he was the first black golfer, but the first black golfer to challenge Jack Nicholaus' record for best golfer on record. Trying to keep it short and away from race as I don't see race as a factor in this issue.

[Captain Hilts]

23. True! He was wildly popular. I'd heard that. Sam Snead was a shit to my sister!

[Ruby the Liberal]

24. Never met SS - back when I was active, the role model for fidelity and professionalism

was Payne Stewart. RIP, Payne.

[Captain Hilts]

25. I'd heard that Tom Weiskopf and Tom Watson were pains in the butt and not popular among players. nt

[A HERETIC I AM]

26. I'm sure every sport has something similar. I was in Indy Car racing in the 90's and it happened ..

there.

Most of the drivers were married and for the most part, I never saw any hanky panky with regards to the married guys, but there were certainly "groupies", if I can use that term, that showed up at certain races, looking to land themselves a race car driver. There was a set of women you could expect to see in the paddock and pit-lane at every mid-west race; They'd be there for the month of May at Indy, then for the weekends at Milwaukee, Mid-Ohio, Cleveland, Michigan, Detroit, Elkhart Lake, etc.

Several notable drivers were divorced during the time I was working in the CART/PPG IndyCar World Series primarily because of dalliances, most notably Al Unser Jr., Paul Tracy and Michael Andretti. Andretti, you may remember spent part of the 1993 season on the Formula One circuit and during that time, a scathing article was published in Sports Illustrated that was not at all kind to his wife Sandra, who was his high school sweetheart. She was characterized as a clueless, self absorbed, spoiled American rich girl who completely lacked the class necessary for wife of an F1 driver. He divorced her 3 years later in 1996 with many in the Indy Car paddock at the time saying that the F1 foray was the beginning of the end for them.

I spent two thirds of the 1997 season driving a display truck on the NHRA circuit and saw the same thing there.

For better or worse, high profile, professional sports figures are attractive to many women and, although the married men who engage such women are far from innocent, those women do tend to literally throw themselves at those guys.

I am by no means suggesting that is an excuse for infidelity.

I'm just saying that's how it is.

[girl gone mad]

27. Boring men and the desperate women who boink them...

film at 11.

[dusmcj]

28. interesting insights, thanks for sharing /nt

[MineralMan]

29. It's not surprising. Just about any activity that is done in public

for money attracts its own groupies. Even classical musicians. I was a semi-pro oboist for a number of years, in a woodwind quintet. There were a couple of young women who managed to show up at every public performance we did, always sitting right up front. Afterwards, they always came up and did the whole touchy-feely thing to me. As a happily-married guy, I just sort of ignored them, but there they were...every time.

I suspect the same thing happens to anyone who performs in public and who is not unpresentable.

[elehhhhna]

33. people, John Gosselin is geetting gals! Any celebrity has it thrown his way --

and it's up to him to be a slut or not.