CompromiseCareTM

[blindpig]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) - The United States Senate today unveiled details of its health care plan, tentatively called CompromiseCareTM:

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) - The United States Senate today unveiled details of its health care plan, tentatively called CompromiseCareTM:



-- Under CompromiseCareTM, people with no coverage will be allowed to keep their current plan.



-- Medicare will be extended to 55-year-olds as soon as they turn 65.



-- You will have access to cheap Canadian drugs if you live in Canada.



-- States whose names contain vowels will be allowed to opt out of the plan.



-- You get to choose which doctor you cannot afford to see.



-- You will not have to be pre-certified to qualify for cremation.



-- A patient will be considered "pre-existing" if he or she already exists.



-- You'll be free to choose between medications and heating fuel.



-- Patients can access quality health care if they can prove their name is "Lieberman."



-- You will have access to natural remedies, such as death.

http://www.borowitzreport.com/index.aspx

[Laelth]

1. Thanks. I needed a laugh.

Unfortunately, this is awfully close to reality.

:dem:

-Laelth

[blindpig]

2. kick