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‘Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the House
Ms. Pelosi was scurrying, like a big botoxed mouse.
She was rounding up colleagues to bend to her will,
And pass the two thousand page-long health care bill.
Its copies were stacked on each lectern with care,
In hopes that the votes for its passage were there.
Meanwhile in the Senate, that Scrooge Harry Reid,
Was twisting some arms for the votes that he’d need.
The end of the sessions seemed nowhere in sight
As our reps settled down for a long winter’s night.
Not a peep from the liberals about mounting debt,
They just wished they were outbound on a private jet.
Dreaming fondly, it seems, of vacation, instead
Of debating a bill most of them hadn’t read.
A few moderate Democrats pondered again
The sad fate that awaited in two thousand ten.
From the previous summer, they knew all too well,
How the staid town hall meetings turned into pure hell.
They could barely remember a ruckus like that,
Since the day they tossed in their political hat.
Yet now here it was Christmas (was that word still allowed? )
And back home, before long, they’d be facing those crowds
Of dissatisfied voters, some surly and mad,
Who considered mandates badder than bad.
So the reason the pols hadn’t yet taken leave,
Was to push through the blasted bill on Christmas Eve,
When constituents had other things on their mind,
Ah, yes, that was the best time for bills to be signed.‘
From the windows, the snow fall made D.C. look grand,
But inside, the snow job was the matter at hand.
To shove insurance penned mandates down America’s throat,
Hoping folks would forget when it came time to vote.
Ms. Pelosi sat snug in her posh Speaker’s chair
While visions of 2012 danced ‘round her hair
Then from out of the Senate there rose such loud groans,
The chattering solons put down their cell phones.
When what to their wondering eyes should appear
But some Democrat holdouts who acted quite weird.
One of them, Mary Landrieu from the Bayou State
(And “buy you” they do to advance the debate!)
Was — despite all her pork and her ballyhooed gloat–
Giving some thought – God help her! – to changing her vote!
But it didn’t take long ‘’til her spine turned to jelly
As the purse strings were loosed for still yet more pork belly.
And so both bills were passed, and they turned off the lights –
Merry Christmas to all, and for all a sad plight.
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