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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-20-10 11:50 PM
Original message
WELCOME TO THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA Press 1 for English. Press 2 to disconnect until you learn t
Edited on Thu Jan-21-10 12:02 AM by Maru Kitteh
WELCOME TO THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA Press 1 for English. Press 2 to disconnect until you learn to speak English.


Has anyone else had this bullshit pop up on their FaceBook?

This is my response, please help me refine it in order to be suitable to the format, and HOPEFULLY - viral.

WELCOME TO THE MIDDLE OF THE NORTH AMERICAN CONTINENT. Press 1 for Wôpanâak. Press 2 if you didn't know these are the people who kept the first white settlers alive. Press 3 If you're damn sure every single one of your ancestors spoke perfect English when THEY got here. And remember, good people have been killed in the name of Jesus (Salem, MA witch trials) and 100's of thousands of American soldiers who lie now in cold ground never sought war, THEY WERE DRAFTED. It doesn't matter if you copy and paste this, it will still be the truth, and the truth doesn't need FaceBook.
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Hugabear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-20-10 11:53 PM
Response to Original message
1. Hey, if English was good enough for Jesus, it's good enough for me!
Hope I don't need the sarcasm tag, although I have actually heard someone say that.
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-20-10 11:56 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. I hear that was right after he decided to go for the "ethnic look"
Cuz he had lovely blue eyes in all the really really authentic paintings.
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LooseWilly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:56 AM
Response to Reply #2
22. It's hard to capture the blue eyes in a painting on black velvet though...
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proud patriot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-20-10 11:56 PM
Response to Original message
3. I'm on facebook
instead of "the truth doesn't need facebook" it should be "facebook needs more truth" IMHO
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-20-10 11:59 PM
Response to Reply #3
8. GOOD ONE! thx
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Hekate Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-20-10 11:57 PM
Response to Original message
4. KnR. Well done. I may want to borrow that.
:thumbsup:

Hekate
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-20-10 11:59 PM
Response to Reply #4
9. Oh - PLEASE DO. Any part that is useful.
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bobbolink Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-20-10 11:57 PM
Response to Original message
5. hahaha! Very good... LOVED the Press 1
Last year at Denver March PowWow, I got a wonderful T-shirt..

With a great drawing of tattered pilgrums tm ^_^ standing in line, being served by an Indian, with the words,

AMERICA'S FIRST WELFARE LINE!

Some people need to be constantly reminded... ^_^
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:21 AM
Response to Reply #5
12. I've given up trying to produce numbers to explain myself. My mom is Jewish and First American.
her mom was about 25% white European, but she abandoned all 7 kids when my mom was 6 years old. My mom went into the system and was rented out as a slave. I don't mean that in any light sense of the word. She was rented out to white farm families where she was expected to gather the coal and wood to make sure the family was warm before they got out of bed, make them breakfast, and work the farm. She was denied an education and not paid. She couldn't leave. That is slavery.
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bobbolink Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:29 AM
Response to Reply #12
14. Slavery, to say the very least.
What an incredible story, and obviously it wasn't that long ago.

:hug:

It takes my breath away to think what she went through. Is she still alive? This should be in a book!
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:40 AM
Response to Reply #14
18. Yes, she lives. I cherish her every day.
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bobbolink Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:43 AM
Response to Reply #18
19. What an incredible and special woman.
Again, I hope her story can be published.

My best wishes to both of you!
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AspenRose Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:03 PM
Response to Reply #5
53. Damn, that's good
Edited on Thu Jan-21-10 01:05 PM by AspenRose
Right up there with the "Homeland Security" shirt...love that shirt

There's an "America's First Soup Kitchen," too!
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GOPNotForMe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-20-10 11:58 PM
Response to Original message
6. I
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TorchTheWitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-20-10 11:58 PM
Response to Original message
7. I miss the days when phones were answered by real people
instead of always having to fight with a recording. I particularly hate the recordings that try to sound chatty as if the recording was a real person.

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C_Lawyer09 Donating Member (690 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:03 AM
Response to Reply #7
23. Sympatico
If you are a recording, don't try to fool me, the moment of deception makes the duplicity painful. I especially used to hate the animated Sprint lady Claire. I'm sorry, I didn't understand your response..... Me trying to improve my diction, I'm sorry, I didn't understand your response..... AHHHHH!
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BlueDemKev Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 11:32 AM
Response to Reply #7
43. Real People Do Answer.....
....from INDIA!
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Terra Alta Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:00 AM
Response to Original message
10. amazingly, no.
At least not that I've noticed. And it's quite surprising considering a great majority of my FB "friends" are xenophobic right-wingers.
Being half Native American though, I could very well tell all of them to get the hell out of MY country, and go back to Europe... ;)
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HeresyLives Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:04 AM
Response to Original message
11. I'd skip the part beginning:
'And remember, good people have been killed' because that gets you off into an entirely different topic. A good topic, but it's not about language.

Maybe you could end it with 'immigrants built America' or 'we are all immigrants' or some such thing.
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:25 AM
Response to Reply #11
13. I was trying to play off of their assertion that only JESUS is there for yoru soul.
Maybe "people have been killed in fear" ??
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HeresyLives Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:34 AM
Response to Reply #13
16. I like the topic, but it doesn't really fit in with
'speak English or else'.

You could maybe work it in with 'a lot of people who didn't speak English very well died for this country' or some variation of that.
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:39 AM
Response to Reply #16
17. that's an excellent point to add to those who were drafted.
People who never spoke English died for the USA.
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proud2BlibKansan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:31 AM
Response to Original message
15. Excellent
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Luminous Animal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:47 AM
Response to Original message
20. Maybe you could mention the Navaho code makers during WWII
Most did not know English but served their country.
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:18 AM
Response to Reply #20
24. They were in my thoughts, along with the fighters of Alaska.
So many who deserve equal mention.
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guitar man Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:54 AM
Response to Original message
21. Brilliant!!
It's going int status....I'm in Oklahoma, they aren't going to know what to say :rofl:
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EndersDame Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:33 AM
Response to Original message
25. I think every American child should learn Spanish
or Portuguese . We should be able to communicate with our neighbors. I was at the dog park today and there were some visitors from Germany who spoke English and reminded us that a lot of Europeans learn English and other languages aside from their mother tongue to communicate easier.
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Terra Alta Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:51 AM
Response to Reply #25
30. I really want to learn Spanish...
I took a Spanish class in high school... but that was just a basic class and 12 years later I've forgotten most of it...

I've heard Rosetta Stone is really good at helping you learn another language but it's pretty expensive and I can't afford it now. Which sucks because there is a growing Hispanic population in my area and I really want to be able to communicate with them!
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EndersDame Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:56 AM
Response to Reply #30
32. Make friends and try to get some lessons ! Perhaps you could help someone out with English as well!
Dont Feel bad! I am half Mexican but was raised solely by my white mama! I am a little embarrassed at my command of Spanish. I am trying to arrange a deal where I help my neighbor get a better command of English and hopefully I will get a better command of Spanish! She works and has kiddos so hopefully she will have some time
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Iggo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 11:21 AM
Response to Reply #30
41. Any lessons at all will do.
The thing is, you have to use it. Speak Spanish every day and you'll learn very quickly.
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:41 AM
Response to Original message
26. Final version that would fit. Feel free to spread and/or alter as you see fit
WELCOME TO AMERICA. Press 1 for Wôpanâak. Press 2 if you didn't know these are the people who kept the first white settlers alive. Press 3 if ALL of your ancestors spoke perfect English when THEY got here. REMEMBER good people have been killed in the name of Jesus,and thousands of American soldiers never sought war, TH...EY WERE DRAFTED. Copy&Paste this or not, it's still the truth, and the truth doesn't need FaceBook
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Kitty Herder Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:45 AM
Response to Reply #26
27. Thanks for the perfect response to that garbage.
Now if only I dared to use it.

I try to avoid offending family on FB. Sigh.
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 10:32 AM
Response to Reply #27
34. You know, I wasn't going to do it, but I was starting to see that garbage EVERYWHERE
I'm not very good at keeping my mouth shut once things reach a certain level.
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pipi_k Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 10:46 AM
Response to Reply #27
37. Same here
I largely use FB as a place for fun...connecting with family I haven't seen in years, etc.

I try to keep my religious/political views to myself, although my profile does show my Political View as being "Independent" and my Religious Views as being "Rude". But that's as far as I'll go.

It's my fun place, and whenever I see stuff that pisses me off, I count to ten and then go do something else.
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 10:56 AM
Response to Reply #37
39. This is actually the first time I've posted something "controversial" on FB.
My whole page was literally deluged with those damn things though. I just despise the mindless copying and pasting of right-wing bumper-sticker thinking. I couldn't stop myself.
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pipi_k Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 11:37 AM
Response to Reply #39
44. We all have our limits...
I'm sure that one of these days I'll probably crack and do the same...I would just rather not.


Actually, I very nearly lost it the other night when a neighbor (who is a Republican) was posting some of that "Let's go, Scott Brown!!! We need to kick some Dem asses and take our country back!!!" stuff on FB during the election.

I literally had to bite my fingers to keep from doing it. ;)

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Iggo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:47 AM
Response to Original message
28. No, but I had it pop up here on DU today. Yikes! (n/t)
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WolverineDG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:48 AM
Response to Original message
29. Someone in the Lounge just posted a good retort
about Jesus not speaking English....I set my own status to "Just got off the phone with Jesus. Seems He really wanted to speak to some of you, but since He doesn't speak English, He pressed 2 & you hung up on Him."

dg
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 10:37 AM
Response to Reply #29
35. OK... I'm keeping that one as a backup!
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WolverineDG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 11:04 AM
Response to Reply #35
40. Short, sweet, cuts to the quick
might even open a few eyes. ;)

dg
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Maine-ah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 11:46 AM
Response to Reply #29
46. lol...i'm gonna have to do it...
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AspenRose Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:07 PM
Response to Reply #29
54. Beautiful!
:applause:
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lynne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:55 AM
Response to Original message
31. Good point but, unfortunately, your facts aren't quite right -
- the language that met the first successful and surviving settlement of English in the New World was the Powhatan language, which is an Algonkian tongue from the Tidewater region of Virginia. That is the language that greeted the settlers of Jamestown, Virginia, it was the language of Pocahontas, and it was those natives that kept the first white settlers alive some 13 years before the English ever saw Plymouth, Massachusetts or heard a word of Wopanaak.

If we're going to reprimand others, let's make sure we do it with facts.


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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 10:39 AM
Response to Reply #31
36. It's too late for me to edit now, but thanks for the information. Hopefully others will incorporate
it correctly.
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niyad Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 10:15 AM
Response to Original message
33. my standard response to the moronic "english only" morans is, "if you are going to insist on english
only", then I insist that you demonstrate at least a college-level ability to read, write, speak and comprehend what is supposed to be your native tongue. after all, if I can do, and english isn't even my second language, surely you should be able to do so." generally leaves them scratching their heads (or other empty parts)
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pipi_k Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 10:53 AM
Response to Original message
38. Oh, the irony...
Some of the same people who have posted that crap (yes, I have seen it on FB) are alleged English speaking Americans.

Yet some of them can't speak, or write, or spell any better than the "foreigners" they're always ranting about.



PS...my own family tree consists of mostly French Canadians who came to New England during the 1800s to work in the mills, so I'm a relative newcomer in terms of US ancestry, but some of the lines go way back to the first settlers in Canada, and include intermarriage with the First Nation populations.

:)
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BlueDemKev Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 11:31 AM
Response to Original message
42. Learn English if you want to live in America
If you go to live in France, do you expect the people there should learn English for you?

My father came to this country in the 1950's and his English was far from perfect. However, he made an effort to the language spoken in his new country.

Many immigrants who come to America today make NO EFFORT whatsoever to learn English and expect US to learn their language for THEM. That is not right.
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pipi_k Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 11:43 AM
Response to Reply #42
45. As I said above, there's an irony at work...
First thing we need to do is to worry about people who were BORN here who can't speak or write an intelligible sentence.

They can't even handle ONE language, yet we're expecting people not born here to be proficient in a language that totally stumps some of its native speakers.


Really uncool.

If people find they can get by in America speaking their native language, then great. But we shouldn't be shaming them if they don't want to, or just can't.
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johnpaulsen Donating Member (1 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:05 PM
Response to Reply #42
47. Re: Learn English if you want to live in America
Good grief BlueDemKev, nobody would suggest that immigrants shouldn't make the effort to learn English.

But your comment (a common one even among Democrats and other moderate-to-left folks) presupposes that current non-English-speaking immigrants are less likely than previous immigrants to try to learn English. That is not true.

I suppose people assume the above simply because for decades now we've continuously had a population of Spanish-speaking immigrants speaking Spanish and needing translation. But that's not because Spanish speakers are failing to learn English -- not at all.

Just as with all previous waves of immigrants, Spanish-speaking immigrants tend to become English fluent in their SECOND generation of residency, not their first. People are making the error of assuming that Spanish speakers are simply refusing to learn English, but in fact they do learn English just as quickly as previous immigrant groups; it's just that we continue to have new arrivals who don't yet speak English. (Why do we have so many Spanish-speaking immigrants over such a long period of time? Geography.)

As noted by the ACLU:

In fact, contrary to what "English Only" advocates assume, the vast
majority of today's Asian and Latino immigrants are acquiring English
proficiency and assimilating as fast as did earlier generations of
Italian, Russian and German immigrants. For example, research
studies show that over 95 percent of first generation Mexican
Americans are English proficient, and that more than 50 percent of
second generation Mexican Americans have lost their native tongue
entirely. In addition, census data reveal that nearly 90 percent of
Latinos five years old or older speak English in their households.
And 98 percent of Latinos surveyed said they felt it is "essential"
that their children learn to read and write English "perfectly."


... by the way, it's also a commonly held belief that previous non-English-speakers did not require or were not offered some language accommodations by the English-speaking majority -- this belief is also false. Again, notes the ACLU:

At the time of the nation's founding, it was commonplace to hear as
many as 20 languages spoken in daily life, including Dutch, French,
German and numerous Native American languages. Even the Articles of
Confederation were printed in German, as well as English.




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RebelOne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:16 PM
Response to Reply #42
48. I have to agree with you.
I lived in Miami almost all my life until 1989. It was predominately Spanish-speaking when I left. When I would go into any store in my area of Hialeah-Miami Springs, the clerks, cashiers, salespeople, etc., would speak to me in Spanish. I would very adamantly say, "I do not speak Spanish (even though I did know some). This is my country and we speak English here." That's one of the many reasons I moved up here to North Georgia. And the older Cubans would make no attempt to learn English. Why should they? In their neighborhoods, no one else spoke it.
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BlueDemKev Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:56 PM
Response to Reply #48
55. Amen.
There's NOTHING wrong with immigrants speaking their native language, BUT...if they move here to live, they need to learn English. Just as I would have to learn French if I moved to France, Russian, if I moved to Russia, or Spanish if I moved to a Latin American nation.

Hey Rebel, you live in North Georgia? Me, too! Lonely place for us liberals!
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Maru Kitteh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 03:55 PM
Response to Reply #48
56. "your" country?
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Iggo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-22-10 10:14 AM
Response to Reply #42
57. Name five, Kev.
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Mad_Dem_X Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:20 PM
Response to Original message
49. I might have to use that!
I've had the "Press 1 for English" thing come up a lot on my Facebook page. That response is excellent.
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Gormy Cuss Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:21 PM
Response to Original message
50. Props for spelling Wampanoag that way.
Some of my not-so-distant ancestors would have pressed 1.
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LeftinOH Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 12:27 PM
Response to Original message
51. It is quite uncommon to hear "Press 1 for English". In fact, I've never heard it;
Edited on Thu Jan-21-10 12:28 PM by LeftinOH
most recorded phone greetings usually say (in Spanish) "For Spanish, please press 2" --and that's it. I think a lot of people who are irritated by the "press 1 for English" messages aren't hearing exacly what they claim - more likely, they are hearing the brief Spanish-language message and can't handle the "foreign-sounding gibberish", which they then conflate with some sinister threat to the English language.

I spend all my workdays on the phone with a multitude of businesses and vendors- and I have yet to hear "press 1 for English".
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Iggo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-22-10 10:16 AM
Response to Reply #51
58. Yep. English is default.
You press numbers to change from the default settings.
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semillama Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-21-10 01:01 PM
Response to Original message
52. I've seen that, and here's the best retort that my friends have been putting up
"To be factually accurate, many people have died in the service of others. Martin Luther King. Benazir Bhutto. Gandhi. Even Socrates. And, unless you are Native American, your family came here from another country and they likely spoke neither English nor Native American, and would not press one for English. Tolerance goes a long way, as does respect for others."
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