What are the most annoying misuses of the English language? Here's my list..

[X_Digger]

Words / phrases that make me cringe:
They could barely make mince meat
Low self of steam
Whoa is me
He’s in tensive care
Escape goat
use to
ad homonym
I could care less
Tow the line
Taken for granite
A mute point
I did a complete 360 on the issue
Baited breath
Chomping at the bit * (Technically wrong, but in common usage now)
as a pose to
In one foul swoop
Butt naked
Pre-madonna
excedra
expresso
supposably
Irregardless
Pacifically
Walla (voila) or viola
Administrate
Orientate
all of the sudden
Certificated
Could of/ should of/ would of
A new leash on life
alot
down the pipe (down the pike)
libary
beckon call
Febuary
for all intensive purposes
prostrate instead of prostate
low and behold
awhile
contex
"up on" instead of "upon"
beyond the pail
less we forget/unless we forget/least we forget
per say
alterior motive
Here, here!
I should have did that
I should've went
Doggy Dog (for dog eat dog)
card shark (cardsharp)
blessing in the sky (blessing in disguise)
rod/rot iron
rain of terror
shined instead of shone
Another thing coming
Point of you
tender hooks
contra section
conversate
hisself
noone
fixin' to
exscape
hew and cry
snuck instead of sneaked
heart-wrenching instead of heart-rending (or worse, heart-rendering)
full proof
"to pay in the rear" instead of "to pay in arrears"
on accident (as a parallel construct to 'on purpose')
world wind (whirlwind)
snuck
hard road to hoe (row)
cut to the chase (cut through the chafe)
griss for the mill (grist)
begs the question (misused, not 'wrong')
cut the mustard (muster)
went missing (disappeared)
sneaking suspicion (sinking)
Different than (from)
ice tea (iced)
iced cream (ice)
reign in
gotten
Send in the calvary!
on guard (engargde)
based off of (based on)
if and when
unless and until
obligated (obliged)
Nauseous (nauseated)
anchors away (aweigh)
meteoric rise (meteors fall)
commander and chief
Free reign
bold faced lie (bald or bare)
almost exactly
drownded
Running the Gauntlet (Gantlet) * common usage these days
Marshall law
flaunt the law

or confuse these for each other:
Decimate / obliterate
Flounder / founder
Disinterested / uninterested
Loose / lose
dilemma / quandary
to / too
hanged / hung
Affect / Effect
weary / wary
bawling / balling
piqued / peeked / peaked
eminent / imminent
bearing / baring / barring
flair / flare
exuberant / exorbitant
lay / lie / laid / lain
discrete / discreet
its / it's
there / they're / their
your / you're
oral / verbal
Statute / Statue
threw / though
seen / scene
capitol / capital
sell / sale
site / sight
faze / phase
tenant / tenet
then / than
jibe / jive
less / fewer
ideal / idea
whenever / when
myriad / many
shined / shone
invite / invitation
moral / morale
weak / reek
brake / break
peddle / pedal
seen / saw
seen / scene
Conscious / conscience
succeed / Secede
imply / infer
drug / dragged
dissent / descent / decent
sleighs / slays
born / borne
compliment / complement

redundancy:
Over-exaggerate
Hot Water Heater
PIN number
ATM machine
HIV virus
very unique
the hoi polloi
Fleeting glimpse
extol praise
frozen tundra
tuna fish
with au jus

using an adjective instead of an adverb:
"Drive Safe" instead of "Drive Safely"
"you got here quick"
"Don't take it personal."

penultimate - does NOT mean "the last", but the one before the last.

[Romulox]

1. "You are bias". nt

[Political Heretic]

113. I like that one... its like the ultimate insult. No you're not biased... you ARE bias incarnate!!

[Juneboarder]

2. My favorite...

I was talking with an underwriter about why they would not clear a loan condition and when she started refusing to listen any further to what I had to say, she told me that it was a "MUTE point". Now, I've heard of a moot point before, but never a mute point... ha! :)

[lamp_shade]

24. Jewlery/Jewelry samwich/sandwich I seen him coming down the street

[xynthee]

329. Yep, "seen" instead of "saw" is big in the South

Also, "come" as the past tense of "to come", e.g., "He come up here last night."

I'm a NYC liberal elite now, though, so I don't hear it as much.

Damn, I'm going to be on this thread all day!! It's a good thing I'm unemployed or I'd get fired!!

[timtom]

351. The late Dave Thomas of Wendy's used to say

"...sawinch..."

I liked that enough to adopt it for personal use.

Remember the kid in 1st grade who used to say "chimley" (for chimney)?

[antigone382]

265. My stepmother: "Books are BANDED." (to punish me for not doing enough housework)

...Never mind that I did twice as much as her actual daughters, who I was not allowed to compare myself to...of course, since they weren't BANNED, I continued to read them.

The woman literally told me that watching TV was no different from reading books.

[tavalon]

393. Are you, by chance, Cinderella?

[devilgrrl]

294. I hope you corrected her!

I would have :evilgrin:

[Juneboarder]

343. LOL, well...

I had already pissed her off plenty and was on a conference call with my supervisor while this was going on. Needless to say, I kept my mouth shut but still got in trouble for pissing the underwriter off. It was SOOO worth it, lol!!

:evilgrin:

[tavalon]

391. It's very, very quiet

[lamp_shade]

3. Supposably

[Romulox]

4. "Chomping at the bit" is considered acceptable, by the way... nt

[X_Digger]

8. Yah, call me old school ;) (I'll denote it as such though.) n/t

[Atman]

87. It's not only acceptable, it's correct.

The "bit" is the metal piece that goes into a horse's mouth, attached to the reins. When the horse is anxious to go, it will chomp at the bit.

Just sayin'.

.

[Romulox]

99. "Correct" is a normative argument. I'll just say that the original form was "champing".

Yours is what's known as a "folk etymology"--it sounds plausible but doesn't accurately reflect the origin of the phrase.

[X_Digger]

100. "champ" is the old school..

http://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/champ+at+the+bit

[kristopher]

193. So the "old school" is somehow correct?

Quick, you'd better haul out those thees and thous....

IMO this is an example of someone with a need to feel superior. The majority of people hear a lot more words than they read. It is perfectly reasonable that they will misconstrue terms they've never or seldom seen written.

[X_Digger]

199. Nah, just me sticking to history.

Where I grew up (appalachia) it was 'champing'.

I recognize that language is fluid, but I'd rather that the 'fluid' nature of English isn't more like a turd circling the bowl.

[SPedigrees]

223. I've been alive a century and a decade, and all that I learned is 'old school.'

I see no need to change with the times, or to have to relearn all that I once painstakingly learned. Call me old school, but I'm neither incorrect nor pretentious.

As one who spent my life around horses, 'champing' at the bit is the correct term. 'Barbed wire' is the correct term for what is now apparently referred to as 'barb wire.' Next 'galvanized wire' will be known as 'galvanize wire' but you won't hear me call it that.

I also learned something about botany during my lifetime and I know the difference between a daylily and a tiger lily. Just because generations of ignorance have now renamed daylilies as tigerlilies doesn't make them so, regardless of what wikipedia says.

[Atman]

235. I agree with you on barbed wire. Barb Wire is a movie character.

But I don't believe you're 110 years old. Although, I admit I could be wrong.

.

[SPedigrees]

240. lol! Meant to say a *half* century and a decade. oops!

[eppur_se_muova]

354. As Molly Ivins pointed out, in TX it's known as Bob War.

It's not just people in the Awl Bidness who talk like that. :)

[tavalon]

394. I miss that fine woman!

She had quite the turn of phrase. She made two decades of living in a whole other country (Texas) somewhat bearable.

[MissMarple]

357. Everyone knows it's really "bob wire".

:) On edit, I stand corrected. eppur_se_ muova wrote it better.

[boston bean]

268. canceled and cancelled drives me nuts. it was always canceled until recently.

and people think I am wrong when spelling it with 1 l.

[Berry Cool]

303. There's no right or wrong with "canceled" vs. "cancelled."

The former is American usage, the latter British. A lot of words are like that--double consonant in British and single in American, or vice versa.

[eppur_se_muova]

360. "Deleveled" is an American palindrome with no British equivalent. :^) nt

[alfredo]

244. I've been in situations where I've read a word, but never

heard it spoken, so I am left speechless when that word was appropriate for the situation. I read more than I speak, so I understand more than I can say.

Pronounce "Flexicalymene."

[tavalon]

395. Like bickerbonnet for me

I had no idea how bicarbonate was actually pronounced until I was well into my teens.

[Cerridwen]

5. Shouldn't that be "Here're mine"? For quantities' sake? (edited)

Updated to note I noticed your edit.

[X_Digger]

11. Lol, yes.. modified

[Cerridwen]

14. I'm prone to typos and misspelled words.

Especially during those times I've tried to correct others' use of words. The speed of my fingers usually falls behind the speed of my thoughts. *snort*

:hi:

[tavalon]

396. That is where teh came from

[Fumesucker]

6. Alcohol and drugs...

Alcohol *is* a drug..

[Romulox]

36. That's up there with calling pot and cocaine "narcotics"! Pig-English.

(play on words intended!)

[RedCappedBandit]

171. Good one. nt

[notadmblnd]

7. My husband hated it when I said "shit load"

[JuniperLea]

12. I agree!

Where I come from, shitload is one word!

:rofl:

[MineralMan]

58. I prefer "pantload."

It's more refined, you know...

[JuniperLea]

181. I get what you're saying...

I use "pantload" in the boardroom... but we're just folks here, right?

:hi:

[MineralMan]

264. True enough, but I think pantload is more colorful, overall.

[notadmblnd]

73. lol too funny

[bighart]

133. A work buddy and I defined said amount because our boss used it all the time.

Defined as "more than you can count on your fingers and toes". Since in that particular place this number was not always the same the amount varied depending on who was uttering it.

[JuniperLea]

182. That gave me a really creepy visual...

Maybe it should be defined by how big your drawers are?

:D

[tavalon]

398. Where I come from, shit is a two syllable word

[Codeine]

255. As he should! It's "shitload," dammit! One word!

;)

[northoftheborder]

9. where it's (or he's, or she's, or they're) at...

...instead of where it is; or using completely other phrase not using AT at the end.

[flvegan]

10. "Republican thinking"

No such thing.

[Romulox]

13. "Bald faced lie" is actually the CORRECT form, btw. nt

[X_Digger]

19. Dangit, typo.. was supposed to be bold

Though bare faced is the one I'm most used to seeing as 'proper'.

[demigoddess]

25. bare faced lie was what we used in the old days

[sufrommich]

15. Loose = lose (it may be on the list, but I didn't see it).

Also "would of" instead of "would have".

[AlienGirl]

18. Oh,"loose" gets me too!

[DrDan]

16. re-la-tor instead of realtor

[Atman]

93. Realtor is actually a trademark.

It's not a "real" word. The term for a person who sells real estate is a real estate agent. Only people who pay for classes and get specifically licensed are "Realtors," with a capital R.

.

[DrDan]

139. well then . . ."Re-la-tor" instead of "Re-al-tor"

[RaleighNCDUer]

140. I think, however, that distinction has gone the way of 'Kleenex' and

'Xerox'. Nowadays, if you sneeze while making xeroxes of the realtor listings, you use a kleenex.

[Saphire]

219. Don't forget the little registered trademark.

Yeah, I worked for a Board of Realtors once.

[AlienGirl]

17. "He/she is ADD" instead of "he/she has ADD". "Begs the question" instead of "raises the question".

[eppur_se_muova]

378. "Begs the question" has a specific usage, when answers don't really answer the questions ...

Q: What cause things to fall?
A: Gravity.
Q: That begs the question, what causes gravity?

... and it believe it was originally "beggars the question", i.e. leaves the question begging.

[tavalon]

399. I'd like to expand on that

Why is it that we say a person "has" diabetes, heart disease, etc. but we say a person "is" mentally ill? I don't like defining a person by the illness they happen to have.

[rurallib]

20. enemy combatant, war on terror (or most anything)

[ctaylors6]

21. between you and I

and similar uses of subjective pronoun instead of objective

would of /could of/ should of would probably be next on my list since it's also so common

[AlienGirl]

26. That one gets written into soft-pop songs and bugs the crap out of me when the songs play...

[Kalyke]

76. Oh, I HATE it when people try to sound all proper and say "myself" when a "me" will do!

For example, "If you have questions, please reply to Jim, Jane or myself for further explanation."

Grrrr... It's a REFLECTIVE pronoun!!! If Jim and Jane weren't there, would you say, "...please reply to myself for further explanation."? No, you (general "you," not you, ctaylors6) would not!!

By trying to sound proper and correct, using "myself" incorrectly makes the offender sound uneducated and incorrect!

[JSK]

167. OMG -- my all time most-hated!

But with all due respect, lol, it's "reflexive." :)

[Kalyke]

366. LOL... got mad at the sheer thought of that use and typo'd.

I guess you'd assume I knew it was reflexive if I even got in the same hemisphere with that part of speech.

:rofl:

[RedCappedBandit]

170. Nothing..NOTHING..makes me angrier than people...

saying "myself" to sound intelligent. Argh!

[JuniperLea]

190. You'd freak out if you saw a bonus self-review...

One of my assistants handed me last month. The word "furthermore" began the second, unrelated paragraph. It was just dumb as shit. My boss (the managing director/head of the west coast office) weighs in on bonus reviews of my staff... I was smart enough to leave the section asking for bonus amount blank, because I knew he was going to say... no freaking bonus for this bonehead! Well, he didn't say that... not in those words, but when you work for someone a handful of years, you get to know things:)

Note to anyone who must submit self-review reports to their employer... spell check is your friend... MSWord grammar check is your friend too. Don't use big words to try to sound smart (especially not when your boss is a professional writer) and if you feel you really must do so, look up the damn word first so you know what it means!

AAAAARRRRRRRGH!!!

[Igel]

212. Mencken had something to say about the "between you and I"

business, and how it patterned in the 1920s English varieties he looked at.

For at least one urban dialect, it wasn't so much objective/subjective as verb adjacent or not (IIRC).

"Would of" and similar forms are what you get when you teach kids a list of all contractions and leave out some common ones. "Would've"--which, because the "dv" cluster isn't really pronounceable in English, has to have some sort of vocoid to license the final -v. Same for "it'll"--although there we have syllabic l as an option; perhaps we should think of "would've" as having "syllabic v"?

[Echo In Light]

22. Not two delabor the point, but...

[Cirque du So-What]

23. I must take exception to the placement of 'cut the mustard' on that list

Cut the mustard
Meaning

To succeed; to come up to expectations.

Origin

Why cutting mustard was chosen as an example of high quality is unclear. As always in such circumstances, there are no shortage of guesses. Some of these allude to the literal difficulty of cutting mustard in its various forms; for example:

- Mustard seed, which is hard to cut with a knife on account of its being small and shiny.
- Mustard plants, which are tough and stringy and grow densely.
- Culinary mustard, which is cut (diluted) and made more palatable by the addition of vinegar.

There is no evidence to support these derivations and they give the impression of having been retro-fitted in an attempt at plausibility.

Another supposed explanation is that the phrase is simply a mistaken version of the military expression 'cut the muster'. This appears believable at first sight. A little research shows it not to be so. Muster is the calling together of soldiers, sailors, prisoners, to parade for inspection or exercise. To cut muster would be a breach of discipline; hardly a phrase that would have been adopted with the meaning of success or excellence. This line of thought appears to have been influenced by confusion with the term 'pass muster', which would have the correct meaning, but which could hardly be argued to be the origin of 'cut the mustard'. The OED, which is the most complete record of the English language, along with all of the other reference works I've checked, don't record 'cut the muster' at all. The fact that documented examples of 'cut the mustard' are known from many years before any for 'cut the muster' would appear to rule out the latter as the origin.

There has been an association between the heat and piquancy of mustard and the zest and energy of people's behaviour. This dates back to at least 1672, when the term 'as keen as mustard' is first recorded. 'Up to mustard' or just 'mustard' means up to standard in the same way as 'up to snuff'. 'Cutting' has also long been used to mean 'exhibiting', as in the phrase 'cutting a fine figure'. Unless some actual evidence is found for the other proposed explanations, the derivation of 'cutting the mustard' as an alternative way of saying 'exhibiting one's high standards' is by far the most likely.

more...

http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/cut-the-mustard.html

Even if you can provide incontrovertible evidence that 'cut the muster' is the correct term, convincing everyone to stop using 'mustard' would be a quixotic venture at best. It's too deeply ingrained in popular usage to convince people to make a swap with another word. One cannot undo performances of He's Too Old to Cut the Mustard Anymore by artists ranging from Ernest Tubb to Rosemary Clooney to Buck Owens, after all.

[mwb970]

98. I've always seen it as "cut the mustard".

"Cut the muster" would make my list of mistakes.

[Morning Dew]

106. "up to muster" would be correct, I think.

[xynthee]

331. OP is probably thinking of "pass muster"

[TuxedoKat]

27. Using him/her when it should be he/she or the reverse nt

[catbyte]

28. "Them are" arrgh!

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

29. "like" when used as emphasis. Same for "basically".

It's like, basically, dumb.

[SidDithers]

30. Use of "less" instead of "fewer" makes my teeth hurt...

less people is incorrect
fewer people is correct

Sid

[ctaylors6]

48. express lines at grocery stores must drive you nuts

[hlthe2b]

136. That one does get to me, but I'm used to it now...

We'll never get them to change, no matter how incorrect it is.

[Kalyke]

79. Former reporter here and I hate that, too.

Along with using the word "over" to mean "more" instead of "above" and not using "more than" to mean, you know... MORE.

It should not be: Our company has cornered this market for over 50 years.

It SHOULD be: Our company has cornered this market for MORE THAN 50 years.

Or: The hot air balloon rose over our heads.

[JerseygirlCT]

132. Oh yes, me too!

Like the beer commercials. "Tastes great. Less calories"

[cameozalaznick]

178. Or the Dr. Pepper ads than ran for a while...

Diet Dr. Pepper tastes more like real Dr. Pepper. More like real Dr. Pepper compared to what? Arsenic? Battery acid? Horse piss? What?

[JerseygirlCT]

194. Yes!! Too funny.

Now there's a commercial for... gee, what? Something for kids, I think.

But it starts with something like "Isn't it amazing how fast kids grow these days?"

As opposed to how they grew those days?

You just know some dope threw that "these days" in there to try to make it sound folksy and real.

All it does it bug me. And I can't remember what they were advertising, so... fail!

[Berry Cool]

306. How about when people use "anymore" to mean "these days"?

"Isn't it amazing how fast kids grow anymore?"

This one is very popular in Ohio, along with Pittsburgh-isms like dropping the "to be" in phrases like "This house needs cleaned" or "The dishes need washed."

Sets my teeth on edge.

[RaleighNCDUer]

144. Well, less people IS correct, if you mean the area has no people at all. nt

[Igel]

213. "Less people" is correct

when the people there are skinner or smaller.

"There's less people on that elevator today."
"Yes, Shirley had liposuction a few days ago, had 53 lbs. taken out."

If the area has no people at all, then it's not "less people," it's "peopleless." To coin a word.

[Bobbie Jo]

31. Irregardless

LOL....Thanks for this.

:rofl:

Edited to add: My 16yr old is fluent in this language...

She put her new insurance card in her "glove department."
When working in Windows, she often has to "minisize" to work on another another page.

Yes, we're working on English as a second language. Gotta love her.

[Better Believe It]

32. Like, I shouldn't say these things, like what's wrong with them, like I'm taking a break from this .

Like, like, like, like!

:)

[SidDithers]

39. My kids are like that...

I must interrupt them 10 times in every converstation:

"Was it like a box of crayons, or was it a box of crayons?"
"Was it like a red sweater, or was it a red sweater?" :rofl:

Sid

[SidDithers]

44. dupe delete.

Sid

[PurityOfEssence]

301. So, you come from San Fransisky?

An you drove, or didja gonna flew?

[ctaylors6]

47. that annoys me too but I sometimes find myself saying "like" too much

[AlienGirl]

60. It's a bad habit but it can be broken. If you're stumped for your next word, pause for breath

A fairly long pause here and there will only make your words seem more considered. You'll sound like an intellectual heavy-hitter rather than a teenage dilettante.

Tucker

[Better Believe It]

69. Like, do I wanna be an intellectual heavy-hitter? :)

[JerseygirlCT]

196. Obama does that

You don't hear very many ums. He usually tends to just pause so that his mouth can catch up with his brain.

[AlienGirl]

234. Yes, he does, and it reflects well on him. Brain catching up to mouth was a huge part of 43s problem

[JerseygirlCT]

195. Oh, yes. On my kids about that one all the time...

Take a breath, think about what you want to say, and then say it, without all the likes.

[xynthee]

333. I almost get into public brawls with strangers over that shit!

Drives me CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :grr:

Who knew there were so many Valley Girls in NYC??!!

[inna]

33. "for all intensive purposes". "anyways".

[GreenStormCloud]

37. Don't you mean, "for all intents and purposes"?

[AlienGirl]

63. "For all intents and purposes" itself can usually be replaced with an adverb of choice.

[GreenStormCloud]

110. Yes, it can, and should be. N/T

[snagglepuss]

277. i know there are adverbs of manner, time, place, cause, or degree but

I've never heard of an adverb of choice. What adverb could replace for all intents and purposes?

[mod mom]

34. I thought this thread was going to discuss Frank Luntz's Orwellian terms for the GOP.

Think "Death Tax for Estate tax etc

[AlienGirl]

35. Vocalized pauses and "junk" words like, really, like, uhhhhhhh, like, bother me.

If you can't think of the next word to say, PAUSE! You do not have to vocalize at every minute!

Tucker

[Romulox]

In Japanese, Uh = "ano....". Go back and watch Mr. Toyoda's testimony with this in mind! nt

[AlienGirl]

51. I wouldn't be able to do so without laughing--to me it'll sound like he's talking about butt-holes!

I speak Spanish--or used to, now I only have half a tongue--and "ano" is Spanish for "anus"!

To me the speech will sound like rapid unknown language punctuated with "anus".

Tucker

[AsahinaKimi]

129. Japanese use "etto" as well.

etto...neko ga suki desu.

"um.. I like cats. "

[dmr]

292. I heard him say "ano" often. I wondered what it meant, because,

when the translator spoke, its meaning wasn't clear.

And, ah, now, I know. :rofl:

While I'm here posting, I will admit, when I was a girl, I would say: "I boughten it at Hudson's." I would swear up and down 'boughten' was a real word. I truly thought it was.
:shrug:

[slutticus]

385. eeto anou ma ma ma eeto ah! sou sou sou!

[JerseygirlCT]

197. The one that drives me nuts is "you know"

it usually sounds so condescending.

[AlienGirl]

232. Yeah! Passive-aggressive technique is to tack "...you know?" on a disputed statement

As when someone says something like, "I know you think there's global warming, but why isn't Al Gore visiting the people hit by blizzards, you know?" (Insert pause as speaker waits for reply...)

It asks the listener to interject a "yes" to a statement with which the listener disagrees, or else to say "I don't know" and giive the speaker an opportunity to "educate" the listener.

Tucker

[JerseygirlCT]

290. Yes! And it's companion: "okay?"

As if the listener is slow or something.

I worked with one total buffoon once, with a very inflated idea of his own importance. Besides constantly licking his lips (get a chapstick!), every sentence was punctuated with "okay?"

(Can you tell I really couldn't stand the guy?)

[DeltaLitProf]

293. Bill O'Reilly . . . .

. . . uses both "Okay?" and "All right" this exact way.

[Morning Dew]

38. "Nip it in the butt"

is one of my favorites.


There was another one I saw here on DU recently that cracked me up - can't think of it right now. Damn.

[X_Digger]

41. LOL!! Never heard that one.. {snip} stolen :)

[Morning Dew]

42. I remember now...

"on the lamb"


I laughed mfao.

[reflection]

134. There's a Blue Oyster Cult song

that refers to this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vdsUDNpM54

[RaleighNCDUer]

147. Of course, Colbert gave that one a big boost

with his "Monkeys on the Lamb" segments.

[ctaylors6]

45. I like that one and may use it myself nt

[inna]

64. LOL, I like it!

:rofl:

[SmileyRose]

260. Barney Fife.

:)

[Cronus Protagonist]

40. Clearly, this OP is a just a cut and paste from one Free Republic thread

n/t

[ctaylors6]

43. good instead of well, esp with athletes: I played good today!

[GreenStormCloud]

46. "In the process of"...is totally useless.

Take any sentence in which that phrase is used, line through that phrase, and the meaning of the sentence does not change at all.

For example:

They are in the process of drawing up the contract.

They are in the process of drawing up the contract.

What is the difference?

[GreenStormCloud]

49. I hate to hear "good" used when it should have been "well".

"They did the job good" should be "They did the job well."

[Romulox]

50. To me, your two phrases say two distinct things.

The former phrases speaks to negotiations, and the latter speaks to the act of drafting.

[GreenStormCloud]

86. OK, try this one:

He is in the process of drawing water from the well.

He is drawing water from the well.

[Romulox]

96. Point made in the second example. No arguments. nt

[Igel]

214. Focus.

One draws attention, so to speak, more explicitly to the action.

As is the case with many things in discourse pragmatics and even in syntax, since they can't be reduced to a set of simple rules put in a book there must be no distinction.

Standard Czech is based largely on a very much older norm and not on the home language of most Praguers, but the standard is clear about vocabularly, phonology, and morphology. When it comes to syntax--something that admits of difficult description--the standard is pretty much what's spoken. When it comes to discourse pragmatics, the standard is fairly silent.

The same is true with much of English. We have a fairly explicit formal standard and norm, but beyond that prescriptivists couldn't be bothered--and a lot of people can't imagine that the standard is incomplete as presented. (But, of course, it is.)

[PurityOfEssence]

302. It does sort of connote that they're wasting time.

That's how I use it: there's a bit of difference between "They're figuring out what to do" and "They're in the process of figuring out what to do".

Your point is well taken that it's usually brain-dead boilerplate construction, but it DOES have its subtle purpose...

[sixmile]

52. 'Aks' in place of 'Ask'

The laziest, most ignorant use of the English language. Ever.

[Igel]

221. And yet,

it's not.

The two forms, /aks-/ and /ask-/ are attested in Old English. And Middle English. And in Modern English dialects, both in England and elsewhere. *ask- is probably original, but metathesis happened early in some varieties of the dialects that would eventually become English. In many places in England and even in the US South /aks/ continues older dialectal forms; those dialects just didn't happen to become, centuries later, the basis for the standard prestige norm (based roughly on London English).

At the same time, /aks/ better conforms to the sonority structure of most English codas, and is typologically more common. A variety of dialects have metathesized--and continue to metathesize--clusters of s + voiceless stop to voiceless stop + s.

In some cases, it's hard to tell if a variety has /aks/ because it inherited it from the days before the language had reached what many consider to be the zenith of perfection from some time or other or if it produced it fairly recently via metathesis. And by "it" I mean the speakers.

Language change often has structure. It's not all--or, really, ever--decay and laziness.

[On the Road]

316. Wow --

I did not know that. It's amusing that what is considered ignorant, degenerate, and annoying one century becomes becomes not only commonly accepted the next but becomes orthodox with academic terminology for its development.

If everyone started saying psghetti, future etymologists would be talking about its development by metathesis, just they do now with omelet.

[xynthee]

336. According to Futurama, /aks/ will be the correct pronunciation by the year 3000. n/t

[Blackhatjack]

53. Take all of these away and the "Moran" will go silent !! n/t

[yellerpup]

54. Alot.

I enjoyed your list! :kick:

[pipi_k]

55. If I hear....

"In these (rough/tough) economic times" one more time, I think I will scream!!!!


Oh, here's one... "Commander and chief". That was mostly seen from the RWers during the Dubya years to remind us all of how important his job was.


I cringe when I hear people (the usual offenders are the commentators on the NASCAR races) saying things like, "Well, DW, there's a big contest going on between he and the car behind him". aughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!


I do have some favorite mistakes, though...

the misplaced/misused quotation marks

"Chicken" salad sandwiches

Bathrooms for "customer" use only

"For sale": 19-whatever Ford whatever, blah blah blah, "new" brakes and transmission, blah blah blah


Always amusing... :7

[mwb970]

104. What's wrong with chicken salad sandwiches?

What would you prefer instead of "customer use only"? And why couldn't an old Ford have new brakes?

:shrug:

[pipi_k]

119. the difference...

between chicken and "chicken"

between customer and "customer"

between new and "new"

[mwb970]

220. Ohhhhhhh.

See, I thought you put those words in quotes because you were highlighting something wrong with them. You know, like the way you put "commander and chief" in quotes earlier in the same post. Sorry, "my" mistake.

[pipi_k]

256. Oh...OK....

confusing quotation marks...

no problem

:7

[mwb970]

286. But, I share your dismay about seemingly random quotation marks.

Like you, I wonder why they do this. It "sometimes" seems like "they" just put "quotes" around random words for "no" reason.

":shrug:"

[eppur_se_muova]

355. Some people think quotation marks are for emphasis.

Ut used to drive me nuts, but I'm numb to it now.

[RaleighNCDUer]

151. Well, there are places where you have to wonder about their

"chicken" salad sandwiches.

[pipi_k]

216. hee hee

and sometimes even the "chicken" McNuggets

[xynthee]

338. Then you'll "love" this web page (for unnecessary quotation marks):

http://www.unnecessaryquotes.com/

So unbelievably funny!!

Here's a collection of the best ones on HuffPo:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/10/22/7-awesome-examples-of-unn_n_330321.html

[pipi_k]

344. I'm actually a member of a misplaced punctuation marks group on Facebook...

but I'm going to check out your links for more hilarity...thanks!


PS...the FB page is called:


Let's eat, Grandma! - Let's eat Grandma!


:7

[pipi_k]

345. bwahahahaha!!! the ones on the second link

are a hoot!!!


Buffalo Queefs barbecue sauce!


:7

[MineralMan]

56. Preventative, should/would of, and incidences.

Those are some of my current favorites. There are many, many more.

[unblock]

57. "in tact" (which is wonderful because it would have been correct had they only left it intact)

[yowzayowzayowza]

59. 'fold' used as 'times'

'times' is a simple multiple; 'fold' is a doubling. Fold a piece of pager by doubling it over, you get two layers. Fold again, four layers. Again, eight....

[MineralMan]

70. Aw, shoot. I guess the word "manifold" is right out, then.

Fold has two meanings in English, etymologically speaking. As a suffix, it has a different meaning than the way we use the word "fold" today.

The OED can explain the difference for you, though.

Fold is a very old word, and one that has had many meanings. Today, it just has a couple, but when used as a suffix, as in manifold, it's still correct to indicate number.

[yowzayowzayowza]

81. Disagree. 'Manifold' does not indicate a precise number.

'Eight times' and 'three fold' are precisely the same number.

[MineralMan]

131. More precisely, the suffix -fold indicates multiplication by the

number preceding it. Thus has it been for a few centuries.

Actual meanings of words are often not logical, especially when you involve prefixes and suffixes. It is usage that sets the meaning.

Threefold means three times the number. It has meant that for a very long time.

It may not make sense, but that's what it means.

Of course, the word "fold" also means either an enclosure for sheep, a group of sheep, or a church congregation.

English is an odd language, full of incomprehensible meanings that don't seem based on word roots. It's only when you dig way back and see that "fold" was spelled in different ways and had different meanings long ago that you begin to see how it is defined today. Etymology is a fascinating field of study, despite being a field without paying jobs.

[yowzayowzayowza]

173. I was not referring to the suffix.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/fold

fold - 21. the act of folding or doubling over.

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/fold

fold - 1. to become doubled or pleated

For the suffix def'n the total amount of material increases by the number of times; folding 'doubles over' the same material increasing the parts by a power of two, not simple multiplication of the number of parts.

'threefold' is not the same thing as 'three fold' ... thus the confusion. How often do you see the extra space after the number?

eta: eightfold is three fold or eight times.

[yowzayowzayowza]

350. Am I the only one who wonders...

when someone describes a quantity as 'three fold' if they mean 'three doublings' or 'three times'?

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/double

double: 5 : folded in two

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/double

double: 8. folded in two; having one half folded over the other.

[MineralMan]

112. Actually, the usage is widely accepted in English

Pronunciation
Audio (US)help, file
Suffix
-fold

Used to make adjectives meaning times.
There has been a threefold increase in inflation ( = inflation is three times what it was before)

Used to make adverbs meaning times.
Inflation has increased threefold ( = inflation is three times what it was before)

http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/-fold#Suffix

-and-

Definition
-fold suffix
/-fəʊld//-foʊld/
having the stated number of parts, or multiplied by the stated number
threefold
fourfold
The problems are twofold - firstly, economic, and secondly, political.
In the last 50 years, there has been a 33-fold increase in the amount of pesticide used in farming.

(Definition of -fold suffix from the Cambridge Advanced Learner's Dictionary)
http://dictionary.cambridge.org/define.asp?key=30116

[yowzayowzayowza]

179. I referred to 'fold' not '-fold'. n/t

[MineralMan]

61. Or "pack," when "pact" is meant.

As in:

"You and I must make a pack..."

I made a pack once, but the seams failed while I was hiking in the Sierras. Not a good outcome.

[Berry Cool]

307. LOL. Poor Michael Jackson, not so swift there.

Or was it the lyricist?

There's a similar slip to that in the Stylistics song "You Make Me Feel Brand New." I swear that although the lyric must be "Believed in me through thick and thin," the singer sings "Believed in me THOUGH thick and thin"!

[DirkGently]

62. Cut to the chase

is legitimate, I believe.

When the chase was complete, it was time to "cut to the chase," which meant they type was ready to be printed. (See "Coin a phrase")

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cut_to_the_chase

Or it may have originated with film jargon:

Origin

This phrase originated in the US film industry. Many early silent films ended in chase sequences preceded by obligatory romantic storylines. The first reference to it dates back to that era, just after the first 'talkie' - The Jazz Singer, 1927. It is a script direction from Joseph Patrick McEvoy's novel Hollywood Girl, 1929:

"Jannings escapes... Cut to chase."

http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/107300.html


It also looks like "cut the mustard" may be legit; in any event there's a question as to whether believing it to be a bastardization of "cut the muster" makes any sense:

Another supposed explanation is that the phrase is simply a mistaken version of the military expression 'cut the muster'. This appears believable at first sight. A little research shows it not to be so. Muster is the calling together of soldiers, sailors, prisoners, to parade for inspection or exercise. To cut muster would be a breach of discipline; hardly a phrase that would have been adopted with the meaning of success or excellence. This line of thought appears to have been influenced by confusion with the term 'pass muster', which would have the correct meaning, but which could hardly be argued to be the origin of 'cut the mustard'. The OED, which is the most complete record of the English language, along with all of the other reference works I've checked, don't record 'cut the muster' at all. The fact that documented examples of 'cut the mustard' are known from many years before any for 'cut the muster' would appear to rule out the latter as the origin.

http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/cut-the-mustard.html


I like weirdo online spelling idiosyncracies. A car site I'm familiar with is full of comments about not scratching the "bumbers" and hitting the "breaks."


:spray:

[MineralMan]

72. Man, those poor car guys can't catch a brake, can they?

[DirkGently]

225. Blahahahaha

:)

[muriel_volestrangler]

226. Maybe 'cut through the chafe' was meant to be the incorrect phrase?

Because with 'chafe' being an archaic word for 'anger', or 'rubbing', 'cutting through' it doesn't seem like a sensible phrase.

[Hardrada]

299. I heard "cut to the chaste" recently. By the time I figured out what

the person was trying to say the dialogue had moved too far along.

[DirkGently]

337. That's excellent

... maybe your brain was doing that thing where you make up better song lyrics than were intended ("'Scuse me while I kiss this guy")?

:)

[Berry Cool]

309. I always thought "Cut to the chase" was modern jargon based on the movies.

And not as in making the movie, but as in watching the movie. As in "Don't bore me with all this lengthy exposition and setup, just cut to the chase." As in "All the detail you're giving me to set me up for what you have to say is boring--I don't need it--just tell me the interesting/exciting part."

[Hardrada]

380. Same here. I always think in terms of skipping the boring mooshy parts.

And roaring down the highway!

[Kalyke]

65. The problem is that some of those are colloquialisms

"Fixin' to" and "use to" are used in Southern parlance all the time.

Granted, I wouldn't write something professional using either one of them, but I often slip and say them, but I know they're not technically correct - only regionally acceptable.

[X_Digger]

78. *nod* they make me cringe, even when I use them ;) n/t

[Kalyke]

103. You're from Texas, so this may not work, but here in Appalachia

when I catch myself beginning to speak in that twangy East Tennessee cadence, I just start speaking as though I was from Ireland.

The Irish cadence is so similar to the Appalachian cadence, it's funny. That's why the only non-Southern actor I've ever seen do a realistic Southern accent is Liam Neeson. :rofl:

[X_Digger]

105. I'm originally from Southwest VA, so I completely understand :) n/t

[Atman]

135. delete

.

[snagglepuss]

273. Actually 'use to ' is correct when following did or didn't.

Did you use to go out with my sister?
Did they use to own the company?
Didn't we use to go to the same school?

[eppur_se_muova]

359. Actually, that would be "used to".

http://www.englishpage.com/verbpage/usedto.html

When the spoken words run together, the d gets lost in the sound of the t, and people hear it as "use to", which is incorrect.

[snagglepuss]

388. Actually the example you provided does not support your statement

because it doesn't address the fact that 'did' affects 'used to'. Basic grammar sites aren't reliable sources of information.

[trusty elf]

66. Some of these are quite funny!

"escape goat" ! ! ! "low self of steam" ! ! ! "a new leash on life" ! ! !

Really? Have you actually heard somebody say these things (or seen them written)?

One that bugs me is the use of "media" as a singular noun.

------------------------

farther or further ? :D

[AlienGirl]

71. "Escape goat" is actually the older, archaic version.

[X_Digger]

83. I've been keeping a list (and blatantly stealing others' contributions) for years.

If you think today's twitter-ful and facebook-y language is atrocious, you should have been around for BBSs and usenet.

[trusty elf]

102. I like your list!

It's a veritable suppository of (mis)information! :D

:hi:

[PurityOfEssence]

308. Yes, and you could combine your two sentences by using a colon...

That is, since you're analizing it...

[trusty elf]

314. ! ! !!

:-)

[Sal Minella]

346. Wow. Nice. n/t

[RaleighNCDUer]

160. A new leash on life -

kinda defines my second marriage.

[AlienGirl]

67. "Enormity" for "large size" instead of for "great evil".

[MineralMan]

92. Both are correct:

Main Entry: enor·mi·ty
Pronunciation: \i-ˈnȯr-mə-tē\
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural enor·mi·ties
Date: 15th century
1 : an outrageous, improper, vicious, or immoral act <the enormities of state power — Susan Sontag> <other enormities too juvenile to mention — Richard Freedman>
2 : the quality or state of being immoderate, monstrous, or outrageous; especially : great wickedness <the enormity of the crimes committed during the Third Reich — G. A. Craig>
3 : the quality or state of being huge : immensity <the inconceivable enormity of the universe>
4 : a quality of momentous importance or impact <the enormity of the decision>

Usage: Enormity, some people insist, is improperly used to denote large size. They insist on enormousness for this meaning, and would limit enormity to the meaning “great wickedness.” Those who urge such a limitation may not recognize the subtlety with which enormity is actually used. It regularly denotes a considerable departure from the expected or normal <they awakened; they sat up; and then the enormity of their situation burst upon them. “How did the fire start?” — John Steinbeck>. When used to denote large size, either literal or figurative, it usually suggests something so large as to seem overwhelming <no intermediate zone of study. Either the enormity of the desert or the sight of a tiny flower — Paul Theroux> <the enormity of the task of teachers in slum schools — J. B. Conant> and may even be used to suggest both great size and deviation from morality <the enormity of existing stockpiles of atomic weapons — New Republic>. It can also emphasize the momentousness of what has happened <the sombre enormity of the Russian Revolution — George Steiner> or of its consequences <perceived as no one in the family could the enormity of the misfortune — E. L. Doctorow>.

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/enormity

[superduperfarleft]

68. I hear you. Being a grammar nazi is the cross-eyed bear. n/t

[arcadian]

74. On DU it's - capitol / capital and Marshall Law

Come on this is political board.

[pipi_k]

75. Bwaaaaaaaaaa!!! Just remembered one of my favorite ones, seen here....

Quoted from a Freeper post concerning people living in bad conditions...


They were "living in squabble"....


hahahahahaha!!!!


:rofl:

[X_Digger]

95. *snort* you owe me a new keyboard!!

[RaleighNCDUer]

162. That would be me and my first wife. nt

[snagglepuss]

258. LOLOL that's a brilliant find. nt

[Cetacea]

77. "Homeland". And beginning sentences with the word "So".

"Democrat" president. (I know it's probably proper but it's recent adoption by all right-wing pundits and most republicans makes it annoying)

[MineralMan]

80. Years ago, I was working at the reference desk in a library,

taking phone calls from people and answering their questions. One day, a woman called and said that her husband and brother were trying to settle an argument, and could I tell her the correct spelling for a word she pronounced as "hermorphadite."

So, I spelled it out correctly to her as "hermaphrodite." She told it to the two men, then came back and said, "That's not right." The question is whether it is "pha" or "pho." I told her that the spelling I gave her was correct, and that it was a commonly mispronounced word, especially among men who worked in machine shops, where an inside-outside caliper was universally called a "hermorphadite caliper."

She said that both her husband and brother were machinists, and they damn well knew what the word was and could I just tell her whether it was "pha" or "pho." I explained the origin of the word and why it was applied to that type of caliper. That made her even angrier. She slammed the phone down.

It just goes to show you that the right answer is not always the acceptable answer.

[hyphenate]

82. My personal peeve:

"If I was" vs "If I were"

The first has gone into common usage, but it's still incorrect by traditional standards.

[Hekate]

84. Aw, come on. "Snuck" is just another irregular verb like "drink, drank, drunk." I notice...

... that newspapers eliminated irregular verbs in the past few years. Their editors didn't think to ask me if it was okay to replace "proven" with "proved," either. Tsk. :eyes:

Hekate

[Romulox]

108. Also hung... I think "snuck" is perfectly good English. nt

[Silver Swan]

184. I hate "snuck."

It sounds like a disgusting body fluid. I cringe whenever I hear it used.

Nobody thinks the past tense of leak should be luck, so why snuck?

(At least my spell check agrees that snuck is wrong.)

[Igel]

228. I was in an interesting conversation a few weeks ago.

Somebody had asked about "sneaked" versus "snuck"--not a native speaker of English, by the way. One of the people present said they were interchangeable, except perhaps for stylistic level--"sneaked" was more formal.

One of the other people present produced a sentence in which "sneaked" sounded bad. But a third put it in a short narrative where it was the only choice that sounded acceptable. We went around and around, in pretty close agreement as to when we could use one and the other. What was fascinating was realizing that they weren't interchangeable, and in some cases the only reason to use "sneaked" was because some grammarian somewhere said it was the One True Form.

We were all born and raised in the US--one was from Oregon, one from Arizona, one from Maryland, and I'm not sure where the fourth was from (the non-native speaker was from Poland). Our ages ranged from 25 to 50. The uniformity of acceptability judgments was the surprise.

Oh, and everybody in the room at least had an MA in linguistics, with a couple of ABDs and a PhD. Hence the overall nerdiness quotient.

[Hekate]

251. I think it's the nature of irregular verbs to be... irregular. A Japanese friend I had in college...

... said the two things about English that she found most difficult (aside from the spelling) were articles and irregular verbs.

Since I don't like to sit around and chat about grammatical structures myself, I remain grateful that my schoolmarm mother pounded "correct" American grammar into my head as a child. (I'm not so grateful that she continued to correct me in mid-sentence until the day she passed on to that Great Schoolroom in the Sky, but that's another story.)

It became such second nature to me that I had few issues to resolve with the proofreaders for my PhD dissertation, whereas several of my colleagues were provoked to tears or rage or both by these threshold guardians.

Thanks, Mom.

Hubby likes to talk about such things, however, and would have enjoyed your conversation. English is his second language and he grew up to be a computer programmer, a field in which "computer languages" are not simply metaphorical.

Hekate

[snagglepuss]

278. Gotten has also been tossed but I have no plans to to do so.

[malaise]

85. None were

and I just heard Bunning with it.

[skypilot]

88. The misuse of "sour grapes"...

...as in, "He's reluctant to contest the election results because he doesn't want to be accused of sour grapes."

I saw this a lot after the 2000 and 2004 elections. Sour grapes doesn't mean the same thing as sore loser.

[Romulox]

109. Care to elaborate? (Not snark, I'm curious.) nt

[Hekate]

117. "Sour grapes" comes from one of Aesop's Fables, in which a fox tries unsuccessfully to reach...

... a juicy bunch of grapes growing just out of reach.

"Oh, well," he says as he gives up, "those grapes were probably sour anyway."

Hekate

[Romulox]

118. Que interesante. Thanks! nt

[skypilot]

155. Sorry for the late reply.

I hope Hekate cleared it up for you. Sour grapes is about finding "fault" with something once you realize it's unattainable, it doesn't mean making a stink about not being able to attain that thing.

[Romulox]

161. Thanks. I learn alot on these threads!

(Ironic of "alot" instead of "a lot" strictly intentional! :silly: )

[skypilot]

163. It's only been a few years...

...since I stopped typing "alot" instead of "a lot". I think someone right here at DU might have set me straight.

[MineralMan]

266. Yah, you missed the second "l."

[madamesilverspurs]

89. We've come a long way, baby, from the days when

'nukular' ruled the universe of mis-speak! But it still makes my teeth hurt, just from clenching my jaws at the images it conjurs.

-

[dysfunctional press]

90. "I seen it" or any variation thereof. and "most/more importantly" are the two that drive me nuts.

learn the fucking language, already...

[mwb970]

91. "I decided to take a different tact." /nt

[MineralMan]

97. I'm feeling attacted by that one.

I'm tired of people attacting me.

[Berry Cool]

311. LOL, my mother used to refer to her "digestive track."

She also could never pronounce "perforate" correctly--she always said "preforate."

[mwb970]

320. Shades of "nucular", eh?

What about the people who say "excape"? Drives me crazy.

[dalaigh lllama]

94. It will be interesting to see which ones become "correct" in a decade or two.

For example, it seems more and more common to hear people say the are "nauseous" when they actually mean "nauseated" -- that's always been one of my pet peeves. BUT I've seen some sources recently that give "nauseated" as one of the meanings of "nauseous." And if you've ever read any Nero Wolfe mysteries (set in the 1930-70 period), you'll remember he had conniptions if anyone used "contact" as a verb. Common usage today.

I just try to remember that things that strike us as glaring errors today just might be accepted usage somewhere down the road.

[Lisa0825]

203. I am 41 and have always said nauseous instead of nauseated.

One the few occasions that I looked it up in a dictionary due to someone attempting to correct me, the dictionaries have always shown it as a standard usage.

edited to add - I wonder if it might be a regional usage?

[muriel_volestrangler]

243. Dates back to 1885 to describe a person; to 1613 for 'inclined to nausea'

From the OED:

nauseous, adj.

1. a. Of a person, the stomach, etc.: inclined to sickness or nausea; squeamish. Obs. rare.
1613 R. CAWDREY Table Alphabet. (ed. 3), Nauseous, loathing or disposed to vomit. 1651 J. FRENCH Art Distillation V. 144 It may be given..to children or those that are of a nauseous stomack. 1678 J. RAY Coll. Eng. Prov. (ed. 2) Pref., I have..so veiled them, that I hope they will not turn the stomach of the most nauseous.

b. orig. U.S. Of a person: affected with nausea; having an unsettled stomach; (fig.) disgusted, affected with distaste or loathing.
1885 Daily Gleaner (Kingston, Jamaica) 14 Apr.. 2/5, I..was bumped up and down and oscillated and see-sawed from side to side until I became nauseous. 1927 Chicago Tribune 9 May 10/3 This lasts ten or fifteen minutes, then I have a terrible headache and I feel nauseous. ...

I'd say the common use of 'nauseous' (that you and I use) is fine - it's been around for many years, and is understood by everyone in context.

[dalaigh lllama]

279. Yes, it seems the meaning is changing

It's fascinating to see words evolve to mean the opposite of their original meaning.

Here's what the free dictionary says about "nauseous" --

1. Causing nausea; sickening: "the most nauseous offal fit for the gods" (John Fowles).
2. Usage Problem Affected with nausea.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

nauseous·ly adv.
nauseous·ness n.
Usage Note: Traditional critics have insisted that nauseous is properly used only to mean "causing nausea" and that it is incorrect to use it to mean "affected with nausea," as in Roller coasters make me nauseous. In this example, nauseated is preferred by 72 percent of the Usage Panel. Curiously, though, 88 percent of the Panelists prefer using nauseating in the sentence The children looked a little green from too many candy apples and nauseating (not nauseous) rides. Since there is a lot of evidence to show that nauseous is widely used to mean "feeling sick," it appears that people use nauseous mainly in the sense in which it is considered incorrect. In its "correct" sense it is being supplanted by nauseating.

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/nauseous

[slackmaster]

101. That's a fine collection!

K&R

:kick:

[hlthe2b]

107. The "hooked on phonics" generation aftermath...

Nearly all of these may errors well be linked to phonetic methods of learning spelling, rather than through a combination of phonetic, visualization and memorization, and (most importantly, IMO) READING. That, said, I think we all get sloppy in our rapid-fire online communications. I know that I do.

[dmallind]

111. Lose/loose and the death of the adverb

No you didn't do good on the test, you did well (or, rather more likely, didn't).

[Igel]

238. The adverb's had a short run in English.

We can watch its development in Old English texts, we can observe its spread in Middle English. And we can see dialects where it never really caught on--and dialects today where it's marginal.

Then again, often people think that an adjective that appears to function as an adverb must be an adverb. In some cases it's secondary predication, where it's not so much indicating how the action was done but attributing a quality to either the subject or the object as a result of the action.

Sometimes the argument appears circular: "I did good on the test" might well be saying that what he did on the test was good, not "what he did on the test was well," but you'd have to have a fleshed-out syntactic paradigm to see if there really is a difference in a person's speech.

My wife's from Arizona. If the end result of taking a test was good, she'd say she did good. If she wanted to describe the manner in which she took the test, she'd say she did well. They aren't synonymous. Her grammar is richer than my grammar, because my grammar doesn't allow for that distinction. (At the same time, my grammar retains the subjunctive while her grammar didn't.)

Think of it this way: Speakers in mixed dialect areas were confronted with two apparently synonymous forms in fairly free competition. Speakers loathe synonyms and usually find some difference in meaning for them. That's precisely what they did. There's actually a fair amount of grammatical literature on the difference in meaning and the distribution of this particular linguistic feature. The standard doesn't have it, but that's mostly due to chance.

[Hekate]

114. "Impacted" instead of "had an impact on" used to drive me crazy. The Watergate Hearings...

... were where I first heard that usage, in the young John Dean's testimony. It only took me about 20 years to stop thinking of it as a bad tooth and stop grinding my teeth when I heard it.

Hekate

[hlthe2b]

124. Jargon used in different professions includes many created verbs...

that I find irritating, like "impacted". Dialogue (as a verb) being one such example.

[malaise]

252. Medaled as well

I hate hearing both of them.

[Canuckistanian]

296. Alexander Haig liked to use "impact" as a verb

As in "impacted negatively". He was scolded for it at the time, as I recall.

[Romulox]

115. From our Southern friends: "So' Security", "Co' Cola"... nt

[MineralMan]

164. In Minnesota, "social security" is shortened to "social" by many

people, as in "Well, I can pay you when my social arrives."

[Romulox]

175. That's a different way to get at the same problem!

I actually love that there are pockets of linguistic difference around the country. It's interesting to me! Thanks for sharing.

[MineralMan]

176. It's interesting to me, too. Language variations are fun...

if you're a wacky old English major and linguistics aficionado, anyhow.

I'm easily amused.

[Spike89]

116. Which/that and utilize/use

I know these aren't as amusingly awful as your examples, but I find that the more pompous and important an author is attempting to be, the more these creep in. The passages "which" include these errors almost always "utilize" poor writing skills. Utilize is actually the more painful for me because it is only a bit wrong. Utilize means to use in an unlikely manner, i.e., you use an umbrella to keep yourself dry, but you might utilize an umbrella as a parachute.

[Romulox]

130. Your definition of "utilize" isn't entirely supported by m-w.com.

utilize
One entry found.

Main Entry: uti·lize
Pronunciation: \ˈyü-tə-ˌlīz\
Function: transitive verb
Inflected Form(s): uti·lized; uti·liz·ing
Etymology: French utiliser, from utile
Date: 1807

: to make use of : turn to practical use or account <I'm a great person for utilizing waste power — Robert Frost>

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/utilize

That said, I agree that "utilize" is primarily deployed by self-important speakers in business settings.

[Spike89]

205. Exactly, it is subtly different from use n/t

[hlthe2b]

120. "Democrat" party..... (my #1)

By the way, I don't think it is considered unacceptable to use the redundant terms with acronymns, like PIN number, ATM machine, HIV virus, because the acronyms have developed a common usage and understanding over the years independent of the individual words comprising the acronym. At least that is what editors have told me when writing in lay (non-medical) literature.

Heart wrenching (or heart-wrenching) is also not wrong and increasingly, heartwrenching is likewise considered acceptable.

[X_Digger]

123. redundant words that are redundant make my teeth ache. ;) n/t

[hlthe2b]

128. I know... but they are not going away for the reasons listed...

Pretty soon few will know what HIV or ATM stands for.

[Cetacea]

141. That one is used with intent.

I must applaud Lamar Alexander for resisting using it just now on Shuster's show.

[Political Heretic]

121. Try to remember that there are a lot of reasons people can flub up grammar in posts

...that don't have anything to do with laziness or intelligence.

Dyslexia for instance, adds a lot of oh-so-fun special challenges to trying to write things.

There's an interesting phenomenon in the way some people's minds works that leads to much higher instances of word substitutions - the brain thinking one word while typing another, sometimes without the two words being related in meaning.

Your/You're, Their/They're and things like that are mostly just a matter of being careful, sure.

But there are lots of things that can make internet typing perfection complicated. People can say "just proofread" but that's not necessarily a solution to some of the problems. The only real solution would be to have someone else proofread, and sorry but most people aren't able or willing to go to that length to perfect an internet post.

Having said that my own frustrations with myself are all the simple things I feel like I could avoid with more caution: they're/their, /from/form, your/you're, etc. I know how they are supposed to be used grammatically - I just don't type them right sometimes.

[X_Digger]

127. And sometimes those word substitutions are downright funny by themselves!

I can't tell you how many times I've typed 'Fun Show' for 'Gun Show'.

[Political Heretic]

122. PS - you can add "rediculous" - that's my pet peeve.

I don't know what people are re-dicking, but its "ridiculous" :)

[JerseygirlCT]

125. "Anyways", "irregardless" nt

[Call Me Wesley]

126. Less we forget!

"You got here quick," I verbally said, which was very unique for him, and I was not over exaggerating. "You know, he's in tensive care after he drownded in the frozen tundra river on accident."
"I took the expresso lane. I was irregardless of other drivers, but it still took me awhile to drive through the contra section of the road. I hit the peddle as hard as I could of. I didn't drive safe," he answered with an eminent rain of terror shown up on his pail face. He looked like a statute to me as I cast a fleeting glimpse on him.
"Based off of what the doctor said, he won't exscape this. He will cut the mustard before noon. I'm conscious of it."

It was supposably to late. He would have loosen his life by nightfall, or less hours before. It was a mute point, and we were just looking at him, as he lain there, butt naked and fixin' to dye. It was heart-wrenching.

"Your sure?" He asked. I nodded, feeling very nauseous, like going to hew and cry any minute. It was a hard road to hoe. This was going to to pay us in the rear.
"Noone healthcare he could of gotten for hisself."
"Whoa is me! As a pose to most civilised countrys?"
"Yeah. Its down the pipe. They could care less."

Than, he dyed. All of the sudden. It was Febuary.

[RaleighNCDUer]

168. Excellent! nt

[Atman]

137. "Magnanimous"

I hate being a grammar Nazi, but I couldn't take it any longer..."magnanimous" was becoming my wife's new favorite word, and she used it incorrectly every time. For instance, "If you see something magnanimous for dinner, pick it up." or "That hotel was really magnanimous."

[JerseygirlCT]

138. Years later, this one still cracks me up:

from our (at the time) day care provider, explaining why she wouldn't watch our son that day:

But he's got conjunctionitis!

(All I could hear is the School House Rocks song: Conjunction, junction, what's your function?)

[X_Digger]

145. I think I've seen that (conjunctionitis..)

In arguments..


BUT he did blah bla blah AND then he blah blah OR he did blah blah blah!!!

[JerseygirlCT]

191. That plus "conjunctionitis" instead of "conjunctivitis" nt

[X_Digger]

201. *nod* just making a funny.

.. -itis meaning inflammation of.. so inflammation of conjunctions would lead to them being capitalized ;)

[JerseygirlCT]

204. Sorry...

I probably shouldn't be posting while still out of breath from the treadmill. I should wait until the blood gets back to my brain!

:)

[hlthe2b]

150. "prostrate" rather than prostate (the male organ)

[MineralMan]

156. As a career magazine writer, I often had conflicts with copy

editors at various magazines. Sometimes, these arguments went on for months and months.

My favorite copy editor was a woman about 50 years old at a magazine I won't name. She was a believer in prescriptive grammar and definitions, and I was a believer in descriptive grammar and definitions. We carried on several running usage battles over the years I wrote for that publication.

We alternated at winning the battles pretty evenly. We became great friends over time, but never did agree on proper usage in some cases. Still, it was always fun to go out and have a couple of drinks on the occasions when I went to the magazine's offices. We continued our debates for hours, sometimes.

My favorite argument involved the correctness of the use of the word "boldface" as a verb. Prescriptive dictionaries forbade it, while descriptive ones accepted it as acceptable usage. Since I frequently wrote articles about how to use word processing software, I preferred saying things like, "To boldface selected text, press Ctl-B." She preferred using the word "embolden" in that situation. I found it awkward, pedantic and, perhaps confusing to the reader. She insisted, until the magazine got a letter from a reader asking what "embolden" meant in an article. We switched to my usage from then on. Now, I could have just written "To format selected text as boldface..." but where would the fun be in that?

And so language changes.

[JerseygirlCT]

192. I'm with you

for what it's worth.

I often write copy - and many grammar sticklers find what I write hard to take. Doesn't matter. I'll start sentences with "And" or "But", I'll use an ellipse here and there - dashes, too. If it sounds like I'm talking, then it works!

In your case, what could possibly be gained from using "embolden" other than an award from your fifth grade grammar teacher?

[MineralMan]

263. It's all silly. Still I liked that copy editor a lot. She was the only person

I know who has multiple dictionaries. We had a great time debating minor points of usage.

Nowadays, I'm writing website content. It's very much more relaxed, so I can write my way and nobody cares. What a great thing!

The "embolden" vs. "boldface" argument is pretty typical of arguments between prescriptive and descriptive grammarians. It's all in good fun, really. Probably of little interest to anyone, except grammarians. In reality, I'm not a dedicated grammarian. I just like a good argument.

[eppur_se_muova]

361. My thoughts on that, as an end user ...

If the words "embolden" and "boldface" don't appear in the application menu, avoid using them. If the word "bold" appears, you can say "to change text to bold, type control-B ..."

Best to assume an usually high degree of literal-mindedness from your readers; they may be complete novices, not just to the application, but to the whole culture of computer software.

[agent46]

142. Del by author

[Greyhound]

143. Amazingly long, random cut & pasted lists. n/t

:rofl::hi:

[SPedigrees]

146. "Try and" instead of "Try to" always irritates me.

The fact that kids graduate high school these days (heck grade school for that matter) not knowing the difference between too, to, and two or how to use punctuation to indicate possessives is a grim reminder of the depths to which our public education system has fallen.

[hlthe2b]

148. "whimps" (for wimps)

A British usage that seems to be increasingly showing up with US media types: He is "in hospital" rather than he is in THE hospital.

[X_Digger]

158. There are other british-isms that I didn't include..

like 'whinge' for 'whine', or 'holiday' for 'vacation'.

There's also the youth use of 'prom' that drives me nuts.. 'go to prom', etc.

[ChickMagic]

149. I agree with most of your list

or is it I'm in agreement...
I usually hate how "however" is used in sentences.

However, I'm fixin to kick some dirt on your pants about fixin' to.
It's how I was raised. But then, I used to say PO-lice, Si-REEN and
THE-ater.

[Fire1]

152. I think you've got them all!! n/t

[Subdivisions]

153. chuck grassley? n/t

[Blue_In_AK]

154. Here's one...

"In term" instead of "interim." We have local a radio commercial for a delivery service where the girl says, "We had to have an in term courier until we hired a full-time replacement, so we called Rosie's." What??

[Call Me Wesley]

177. I was never in term.

So they fyred me. Bastids! ;)

[marmar]

157. I've never seen "pre-Madonna" .....

Pre-Madonna? As in Donna Summer? :)

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_h3fTLn_l3pA/SwmkC0zzyLI/AAAAAAAABi4/OXHvOKCw5z4/s1600/donna+summer+-+once+upon+a+time.jpg

[eppur_se_muova]

363. a pre-Madonna prima donna. nt

[Autumn Colors]

159. "could of", "would of", "should of" instead of could've, would've, should've (nt)

[Romulox]

165. The British misuse the word "irony" in that they don't recognize the existence of *dramatic* irony.

I used to post on a British board, and I was lectured more than once that the sense of irony in definition 3a, infra, was simply incorrect. British posters often argued that only definition 2 a is accurate. This argument generally broadened into "Americans don't do irony" (sic), and was invariably buttressed with a cite to the Alanis Morisette song. :eyes:

irony
4 entries found.

1. irony (noun)
2. dramatic irony (noun)
3. Socratic irony (noun)
4. tragic irony (noun)


Main Entry: iro·ny
Pronunciation: \ˈī-rə-nē also ˈī(-ə)r-nē\
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural iro·nies
Etymology: Latin ironia, from Greek eirōnia, from eirōn dissembler
Date: 1502

1 : a pretense of ignorance and of willingness to learn from another assumed in order to make the other's false conceptions conspicuous by adroit questioning —called also Socratic irony
2 a : the use of words to express something other than and especially the opposite of the literal meaning b : a usually humorous or sardonic literary style or form characterized by irony c : an ironic expression or utterance
3 a (1) : incongruity between the actual result of a sequence of events and the normal or expected result (2) : an event or result marked by such incongruity b : incongruity between a situation developed in a drama and the accompanying words or actions that is understood by the audience but not by the characters in the play —called also dramatic irony, tragic irony


http://www.merriam-webster.com/netdict/irony

[Javaman]

166. People using "heigth" for "height". That drives me bat shit crazy.

There is a "T" at the end!!!! T!T!T!T!T!T!T!

[ctaylors6]

169. Me too!! I even snapped at my own mother once, "there's no such word as heighth!!"

[Romulox]

172. Worse than that is confusing "height" "width" and "length"!

Found in instructions originating from non-English speaking countries.

For example, one set of instructions referred to "height", "depth" and "length" as the three dimensions for its product. It actually caused me a moment of confusion, as these three words were not set off against each other such that what was meant by "length" could be readily inferred...

[clu]

174. addicting / i am needing

i really don't care about seeing these in text, since it seems popular to intentionally misspell. the two that i listed come up often enough in RL though

[cameozalaznick]

180. Also, I heard Ben Affleck once say enervate...

when he really meant energized. I like him, but he was trying to sound erudite and just came off as ignorant. BTW those two words mean the opposite thing.

[NYC_SKP]

183. "Fewer than" versus "Less than". Makes me crazy.

Also, I remember an ad for some pain reliever displayed on the subway trains twenty years ago.

It read, in part, "...in as fast as ten minutes."

That just grated me.

I thought it should read, "...in as little as ten seconds".

:mad:

[SPedigrees]

215. or "as fast as ten minutes" (dropping the 'in') nt

[kimi]

185. My personal pet peeve

and it may or may not be a grammatical or verbal misuse:

"People (substitute a name) THAT . . ." instead of "People (substitute a name) WHO . . ." cause in my personal universe, people are not objects (or thats), they are humans (or whos).

JMHO. :shrug:

[Igel]

242. The categorical distinction you're after is animacy.

And the distinction may be standard in standard English, but at no point was universal in spoken English.

It's distinction I "put on" when writing formal English, my dialect--which is fairly conservative in many ways--lacks it.

Now, restrictive and nonrestrictive clauses, I'm sure we can agree, must be properly distinguished and differently punctuated.

[eppur_se_muova]

364. I learned "who" and "that" are both OK for people, "which" is not.

"Which" is used for non-people, as is "that", so that "that" swings both ways.

Of course, one of my students used "witch", so maybe that's affected my standards. :(

[WilliamPitt]

186. "Loose" instead of "Lose"

My favorite.

[NYC_SKP]

187. Ope...got another one: "This need fixed." or "The car needs cleaned", as examples.

I think it may have a regional aspect, but would love to know more.

Would it be that hard to say or type, "to be"???

:mad:

:mad:

:mad:

[SPedigrees]

224. Thank god they seem to have dropped the (holiday) 'gifting'

and have reverted to 'gift giving.'

[Igel]

245. I got resultatives like that from a woman who

picked them up in Eastern Pennsylvania. I've heard them from Southerners, but haven't ever looked up their regional distribution.

I find it handy because it omits two syllables. "It needs washed" is shorter than "It needs to be washed" or even "It needs washing."

[NYC_SKP]

261. It's certainly an economical use of syllables. Many colloqualisms seem to be.

While others may be more complex than the simplest expressions that follow "the rules".

I found the usage mentioned surprising as I thought I was well traveled, only to hear this in my late forties and after settling in my home town.

[eppur_se_muova]

365. I believe that's not found outside southwest PA.

Sort of like "yins".

[Obamanaut]

188. There are some of your phrases to be found at this link, listed with

their origins:

http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/

The first two I checked were there - 'cut to the chase' and 'cut the mustard'

[X_Digger]

202. *nod* not all are universal

due to the dynamic nature of language.

(Some of them still make me cringe, even if technically correct, or in common usage.)

[Obamanaut]

246. Some of the most cringe-worthy ones for me are the ones that

folks will defend as being correct just because of common usage, such as 'irregardless.'

Another is making a statement that might possibly offend, and append 'just sayin' in order to make it seem less offensive.

[lame54]

189. "make me cringe"...

:evilgrin:

[timtom]

198. Great list!

I must admit, I love to say, "Viola!" and then pull out an imaginary piece of paper from my pocket and correct myself.

[AlienGirl]

200. Meaningless hypersyllablization, often used by cops and other court-involved people

"That individual was observed by me to be operating the automobile while in an intoxicated state. I maneuvered to apprehend the individual and initiated my lights while accelerating to overtake the individual..." etc. ad infin.

People seem to think talking like that, with unnecessary syllables and a lot of passive voice, makes them sound more credible or professional, but really they sound like they're auditioning for a bad cop show.

Tucker

[Morning Dew]

207. LOL - most people own a car -

but if they're in court, it's a vehicle - with each syllable clearly enunciated.

[snagglepuss]

257. lol , very true nt

[Marr]

241. Cop talk.

I think it's the rhetorical equivalent of mirrored sunglasses. It's a way of hiding your identity in a robotic role.

[TroglodyteScholar]

206. Escape goat?

I think you made up some of these....

[X_Digger]

222. I wish it were so..

As I mentioned upthread, I've been keeping one version or another of this list for _years_. BBSs & usenet are a treasure trove for someone who notices mangled English.

[polmaven]

208. You have listed most of them...

so I will say that every time I hear someone say "Me and my friends"..or any of the "Me and...combinations, I want SCREAM!

[On the Road]

209. That is a Great List!

I had never heard some of those before. A lot of them are pretty funny.

I would argue, though, that a number of those are simply colloquial English on the same level as ain't: I could care less, Butt naked, hisself, and fixin' to. People can speak however they like in conversation, and these are usually not held up as examples of correct formal English.

Some of those on the list I would argue are either correct or are now considered acceptable by a wide range of people:

awhile: the words can be used almost interchangeably in some cases – but a while needs to be accompanied by a preposition, such as “for” (“I slept for a while”) or “ago” (“I left work a while ago”). Awhile always means “for a while”. ¹

cut to the chase: The phrase 'cut to the chase' originated with the movable type for the printing presses.... The completed phrases were put together in a larger frame called the chase. Once the phrases were finished it was time to cut to the chase.' ²

begs the question : It is true that many people use this when they mean 'begs FOR the question,' but the two meanings are often interchangeable in context.
went missing The reason went missing sounds strange to Americans is that it's a British idiom. ...my version of the Oxford English Dictionary places the first use in a 1958… (G)o is quite a versatile verb. The OED includes nearly 100 definitions, most of which have multiple sub-definitions. A couple of other idioms that use the word go include go begging and go over ³

sneaking suspicion: while it may not have been the original, can't a suspicion sneak up on you?

Different than (from): I learned it this way, too, but there are cases when than is preferable, and it is widely acceptable in British English.

obligated: ob·li·gate Inflected Form: ob·li·gat·ed 1 : to bind legally or morally (Merriam-Webster)

Nauseous : 1 : causing nausea or disgust : nauseating 2 : affected with nausea or disgust

Free reign: I confess I thought it referred to royal latitude too, whereas it originally referred to the reins of horses. However, "turns out that when the Oxford University Press analyzed how "ordinary folks" spell... 54 percent of people think of horses when they write "free rein"; 46 percent of people think of monarchs when they write "free reign." So the dictionary editors decided to be democratic: all of those spellings are now considered 'acceptable.'" ⁴

meteoric rise: Meteoric is metaphorical. Metaphors are not exact. Seems like it could be used to refer to speed but not direction.

almost exactly: Exactness is not a precise quality -- if it were used that way, nothing would be exact.

Running the Gauntlet (Gantlet): Not only common, but many consider it acceptable.

flaunt the law: transitive verb 1 : to display ostentatiously or impudently: parade 2 : to treat contemptuously. In fact, flout and flaunt are virtually interchangeable -- the primary meaning of each one is the secondary meaning of the other.

My own pet peeve is "I wish I was" instead of "I wish I were." Sadly, the subjunctive is dying in English and not even great songwriters like Paul Simon seem to be aware of it.

I have never hear anyone use penultimate to mean final, but I don't doubt it's done. If you really want to confuse those people, try antepenultimate. Not likely to see that one outside of Latin class.

On Edit: One colloquialism that used to crack me up is the use of "even" as intensifier, as in "I don't even think he can do that." I heard that in NC all the time in the 70s.

[fishwax]

210. A few of these are actually correct

Cut to the chase, for instance, is a phrase from the film industry, and chomp is just a variant of champ, so there's no real reason it can't be used in that phrase.

With some of the others I can understand why they rub people the wrong way, and I wouldn't use them in formal writing, but there's really nothing technically wrong with them. I like irregardless just fine, for instance, when used to offer emphasis or when the extra syllable makes for a more pleasing cadence. It doesn't bother me that "irregardless" means the same thing as "regardless" any more than it bothers me that "debone" means the same as "bone" or that "unravel" means the same as "ravel." I also am fine with "I could care less," because I assume the unspoken sarcastic ending that I occasionally heard growing up: "I could care less ... (but it'd be difficult, but I'm not sure how, etc.)."

I also think the objection to redundancies with foreign phrases is silly and misguided, though I see plenty of otherwise intelligent people objecting to them. It's true that "au jus" means "with the juices" in French, but "au" is not a preposition in English. So when speaking in English, it's fine to say "with au jus." When people use "au jus" in any other construction, we treat it as a separate noun, and don't assume they're using the preposition with. For instance, if you were at a restaurant and ordered a roast beef sandwich, and the waiter said "would you like au jus" it would be silly to object to such a construction on the grounds that asking somebody "would you like with juice" is not grammatically correct. When we adopt foreign phrases, we often treat them as nouns. It's the same with hoi polloi--we say "the hoi polloi" because hoi isn't an English article.

Some of the other items on your list, though, were very amusing. I've seen and heard some of them, but not all. Taken for granite always cracks me up :rofl:

[eppur_se_muova]

376. "I could care less" ... correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that typical Jewish humor/sarcasm?

"Like I need this??", etc.

I never heard this down South, hear it a lot from New Yawkers, but especially Jewish NYers. My impression anyway, would like to hear others.

[keroro gunsou]

211. any time former president bush

opens his mouth to speak.

[SPedigrees]

237. The Bushco all time classic: 'nu-cu-ler.'

It's nu-cle-ar you moron!

[thelordofhell]

297. It is pronounced "Double Yew", NOT "Dub-Yuh"

That drunkard couldn't even pronounce his name correctly.

[chowder66]

217. idin it......

dudinit....

pet peeves .....there you go, there it is, there you have it


and off topic a bit...Missoura instead of Missouri. No one says Mississippa.

[McCamy Taylor]

218. HOPEFULLY...someone will stop the evolution of the living language that is English

and it can became a dead language like Latin.

Face it, language changes. There is a reason we do not talk or write like Chaucer.

Whan that Aprill, with his shoures soote
The droghte of March hath perced to the roote
And bathed every veyne in swich licour,
Of which vertu engendred is the flour;
5 Whan Zephirus eek with his sweete breeth
Inspired hath in every holt and heeth
The tendre croppes, and the yonge sonne
Hath in the Ram his halfe cours yronne,
And smale foweles maken melodye,
10 That slepen al the nyght with open eye-
(So priketh hem Nature in hir corages);
Thanne longen folk to goon on pilgrimages

Now that's the King's English. King Edward III that is.

[Hardrada]

389. I took that class too. We had to memorize that part!

Our version didn't have the arabic numerals though.

(Just kidding). I did take English 301 however.

[LanternWaste]

227. "It's like" and "you know" as fillers.

"It's like" and "you know" as fillers. Though the latter is not so much an incorrect use as it is simply lazy, the former implies a simile; hence, "it's like, I went to the store..." is incorrect when one actually *did* go to the store.

But, as with "you know", I'll attribute it to simple laziness rather than simple people. :P

[Rosa Luxemburg]

283. yes!!!!

[Canuckistanian]

229. "Pre-Madonna"

:rofl:

[hulka38]

230. "I could care less" "irregardless" and "for all intensive purposes"

[McCamy Taylor]

231. Aspiring fiction writers take note---if you salt your dialogue with a few

of these "errors", your style will seem more natural. Only use them in the narration if you are trying to establish a strong first person narrative voice. So , for instance, use "gimme" in dialogue but "give me" in the narration.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

367. And your main character will be a complete idiot.

[Cleita]

233. Trolling when I believe it should be trawling, like trawling for

some information, like you are fishing for it.

[cloudbase]

236. "Certificated" is certainly legitimate.

Ask any pilot or securities broker.

[X_Digger]

248. Yup, there are a few business speak-isms in there..

Administrate, conversate, certificated

Me, personally? I'd say certified, administer, and converse.

[On the Road]

285. The Businessspeaksim That Gets Me is "Actionable"

I think it's one of those situations where a misuse is coming to be accepted, but when it started to be used in Powerpoint presentations, the only accepted meaning was something that formed the basis for a lawsuit.

[smirkymonkey]

352. Personally, I really hate "Net-Net" and "At the end of the day"

I guess all businesspeak grates on my nerves. :argh:

[muriel_volestrangler]

239. Introducing ... General Butt Naked!

One notable encounter was with a notorious killer-turned preacher, Joshua Blaye former called "General Butt Naked".

He was given the name by his followers because at the height of the fighting in Monrovia in 1996, he would never wear clothes while he fought.
...
The film contains footage of some of the most gruesome murders of people and the destruction that was carried out during the war but without doubt the encounter with General Butt Naked is the highpoint of the documentary.

In the film, the born-again preacher declares “this is General Butt Naked but by the grace of God, I am now evangelist Joshua Blaye”.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/worldservice/specials/1458_latestnews/page5.shtml

While North American sources seem to prefer General Buck Naked for him. http://www.macleans.ca/article.jsp?content=20030915_65284_65284

Which is correct - 'buck' or 'butt'?

From Gary Parker:

In earlier days it used to be buck naked to refer to a person being observed totally nude. Today, I hear people using the term butt naked, referring to the same condition. Which is it?

I think it has a connection to the slave trade and referring to a male slave as a Buck or male. Also to the fact that they were usually put on the sales block totally nude.

We prefer not to be drawn into discussions regarding which of two variants is "correct". All we can say is that both are used. On the other hand, that doesn't stop us having an opinion about which came first and their possible origins.
...
It is quite possible that butt naked is the earlier form. As a phrase, it not only makes literal sense but we see clear parallels to the English phrases bare-arse naked and bollock naked. A plausible explanation of the buck in buck naked is that it originated as a polite avoidance of butt. The etymologists at The American Heritage Dictionary think that might be the case. Michael Quinion, on the other hand, seems to think buck naked derives from buckskin, but he only mentions this in passing during a discussion of the word buff. Buff, when referring to nakedness, as in in the buff, comes from the similarity of the color of tanned buffalo hide to human skin. The definition of buffalo in this instance is a discussion better left for another day.

http://www.takeourword.com/TOW155/page2.html

[muriel_volestrangler]

247. 'gauntlet' - listed in the OED; 'gantlet' - not listed (except as an alternative to 'gauntlet')

1661 GLANVILL Dogmatizing Pref., To print, is to run the gantlet, and to expose ones self to the tongues strapado.
1676 I. MATHER K. Philip's War (1862) 137 They stripped them naked, and caused them to run the Gauntlet.
1704 T. POCOCK in Torrington Mem. (Camden) 187 One of the boatswain's mates ran the gantlett for stealing a shirt.
1709 POPE Let. to Wycherley 17 May, Hitherto your miscellanies have safely run the gantlet, through all the coffee-houses.
1768 F. BURNEY Early Diary (1889) I. 16 O what a gauntlet for any woman of delicacy to run!
1778 SHERIDAN Camp I. i, You should..be forced to run the gauntlet, from Cox heath to Warley Common.
1830 SCOTT Demonol. vii. 214 Six-and-thirty of those who were young were forced to run the gauntlet.
1839 LD. BROUGHAM Statesm. Geo. III, Eldon (ed. 2) 254 The case had run the gauntlet of the courts. 1851 H. MARTINEAU Hist. Peace (1877) III. IV. ix. 44 The premier had to run the gauntlet between the lines of objectors.
1858 O. W. HOLMES Aut. Breakf.-t. (1883) 138 They have run the gantlet of the years.
1880 PARKMAN France & Eng. in Amer. 12 They descended the Mississippi, running the gantlet between hostile tribes.
1897 F. N. MAUDE Volunt. v. Compulsory Service 33 Scharnhorst..procured the removal of all dishonouring punishments, such as running the gauntlet.

[X_Digger]

249. Hence denoted with the *..

.. someone pointed me to this link in defense of 'gantlet' the last time I posted this-

http://snibbets.blogspot.com/2006/02/throw-out-gantlet.html

[muriel_volestrangler]

253. Yeah, but 'these days' is a bit dodgy

when 'gauntlet' has been in use for hundreds of years.

[muriel_volestrangler]

250. "sneaking suspicion" is in Merriam-Webster, "sinking suspicion" isn't

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/sneaking

OED doesn't list either, but it does have a meaning for sneaking of 'Of feelings, affection, etc.: Unavowedly cherished or entertained; not openly declared or shown; undemonstrative' and examples of kindness, passion, virtue, regard, belief and sympathy - I think 'sneaking suspicion' would fit that definition OK.

[Igel]

254. Don't leave out other phoneticky spellings.

"Deep seeded," for instance, in lieu of "deep seated." But quibbles over orthography are trite. Fortunately, they're most of your examples.

You didn't include that usual bugbear, the indefinite 2nd singular or 3rd plural: Using "you" for some indefinite person and using "they" as an epicene pronoun ("This person came into the saloon, looked around, and then they sat down to order a round for everybody"). Good. No need to show that they're moderately well-rooted in English.

Some objections are quirky: Tuna fish (do you similarly dislike "codfish"?). For me, tuna : tuna fish :: cow : beef. Same for codfish. Although, to be honest, I also think of prickly pear fruit when I heard "tuna."

Others are really too context-dependent for a list: "I was engarde duty." As though using French instead of the English equivalent was a big deal otherwise. "Engarde" is reserved for epee-proximal discourse. Even "shined" can be appropriate: Surely you don't insist on "He shone the man's shoes" (instead of "shined")? I had a student do a survey on preterite/past participal forms a few years back. It was fascinating to see the incredible variety. The two forms have been merging since Middle English; for a lot of young Americans the distinction's very much in flux.

"Shined" is what you'd expect for all meanings; the verb with the mediopassive meaning was made into a strong verb a few centuries ago (along with verbs such as "ride"), but as a transitive it stayed weak. I say "dove" instead of "dived"--it made the weak-to-strong transition later and less consistently across dialects. In some cases, we seem preserve different archaisms. I preserve "gotten" when it's used as a past participle even though British English has utterly lost the form.

Then again, I find it confusing when people say things like "It's important that so-and-so is elected to office" because I find that the sentence claims that so-and-so is already elected and, for some reason, this is an important fact (most Americans seem to have lost the subjunctive so they'd never say, "It's important that so-and-so be elected to office.") It's another archaism in my speech--this time one that's part of the standard norm for formal English.

As for the ill-fated adverb in English, I mentioned that above in this thread. Adverbs--like reflexives--are rather new in English. English was already dialectically diversifying by the time they arose and speakers didn't innovate the categories in the same way everywhere. In a few cases, they missed out on the innovation, or retained both the older and newer forms with different meanings.

One of my favorite quirks, though, is the paradigm of "to be":
He is, he's, he is not, he's not, he isn't; is he, isn't he?
I am, I'm, I am not, I'm not, ??; am I, aren't I?

[snagglepuss]

282. Is it ungrammatical to say "It's important that he 'gets' elected."?

[Initech]

259. I really, seriously hate the term "preggers" to describe pregnant women.

:argh:

[MineralMan]

269. I always say "enceinte." It's more, er, uh, refined.

[trusty elf]

315. That reminds me of an amusing story.

Once, years ago at a music festival in a little town called Saintes (pronounced somewhat like the "sant" in Santa Claus) near the Atlantic coast of France, there was a Gypsy violinist performing. At one point between pieces he was trying to tell the audience how happy he was to be there. What he said was "Je suis très content d'être en Saintes." (should be "à Saintes")

"En Saintes" sounds exactly like "enceinte". Needless to say, there were some giggles in the audience.

[On the Road]

318. Well, When My Former French Teacher Was Young,

she traveled to France trying to learn the langugage. When she had finished a meal and was offered dessert, she would say she was full ("No merci, je suis pleine.") This would invariably result in a chuckle and a knowing smile. She later found "je suis pleine" is an idiom for "I am pregnant."

[lanlady]

270. "we're pregnant"

I hear this more and more from the expectant fathers in the office.

[JerseygirlCT]

280. LOL... they'd be wise not to use that particular phrase

when their partner is about 8 months along!

[smirkymonkey]

353. Ugh!

One of the worst! :puke:

[Initech]

381. Finally! Someone agrees with me on this one!

:toast:

[guitar man]

262. "intellectual conservative"

Or "conservative intellectual". Gross misuse of the English language. :P

[lanlady]

267. nukular

Popularized by a certain ex-POTUS.

[MineralMan]

271. Oddly enough,

Jimmy Carter, who was a "nukular" engineer on naval submarines, also mispronounced the word. It's a lazy tongue mispronunciation. Same with realator and jewlery. It's very, very hard to teach people who pronounce those words in that way the correct pronunciation. I've tried. They simply can't do it.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

272. "Vice" and "vise".

I see "vice-like grip".

WRONG.

A vise is the metal thing that you use to hold things on a workbench.

Vices are immoral habits.

And I have not seen anyone use "faze" properly in YEARS. As in "he was unfazed by the crisis".

They use "phase". WRONG.

Newscasters don't know about past perfect tenses. They put "-ed" on the end of everything.

I have heard them say "grinded" instead of "ground".

And many other words.

Hang, was hung -- applies to pictures.

Hang, was hanged -- applies to people.

[X_Digger]

281. A "vice-like grip" sounds very naughty and fun, though. n/t

[muriel_volestrangler]

323. Or they're using the British spelling

http://www.askoxford.com/concise_oed/vice_2?view=uk

[thelordofhell]

274. Near miss

A near miss is a hit.

[HarveyDarkey]

275. Some people have WAY too much time on their hands

I'd be happy if people learned the difference between there, their and they're. It'll never happen.

BTW, I'd be ecstatic if "ain't" disappeared from the lexicon entirely,

Other than that, I've given up.

[MzNov]

276. deja vu all over again

it means the exact same thing

[Tracer]

321. That phrase could be the speaker making a joke.

It's famously attributed to Yogi Berra.

[MzNov]

372. I've never heard anyone using this trying to be funny

it's still grossly incorrect.

Someone could be joking about any of these misuses.

[Rosa Luxemburg]

284. Seperate!

[wtmusic]

287. Vice-a versa, Jewlery, expresso, drownding nt

[frogmarch]

288. "leave" or "left" in place of "let"

Why did he leave her do that? He shouldn't have left her do that. (gah! I hear it all the time from my husband's sister.)

[eppur_se_muova]

371. Sounds British. An instruction in the Morris Minor owner's manual ...

described how, after removing a set of screws from a part, you should "leave it hang".

Probably very old usage, as well.

[wtmusic]

289. "Orientate" is a word now. nt

[Sal Minella]

347. Not in my world, it ain't. n/t

[wtmusic]

348. I hear you

It's in Webster though (I had it pointed out to me by someone I corrected).

I will keep correcting, Webster be damned.

[warm regards]

291. Wow...!

But I could care less if I cared at all.

[gimama]

295. "functionality" !!!

:eyes:
..or over-use of "basically"
..or starting a sentence with,"I mean I think",common with pundits on the teevee.

great list,by the way..are You a writer or an English major? ;)

[X_Digger]

330. Nope, just an interested amateur :) n/t

[saltpoint]

298. I had a dream once where Franklin Roosevelt's middle name was

'tunafish.'

[On the Road]

319. I Don't Why,

but that completely cracked me up.

:rofl:

[saltpoint]

327. -- --

:hi:

[trusty elf]

324. Once I had a dream about a soul/gospel duo

called "Damn and Save" !


:D

[saltpoint]

328. I'd buy their CD, no question.

:hi:

[WillYourVoteBCounted]

300. "analysized"

I kid you not. I've heard it and seen it. Painful.

[dickthegrouch]

304. Whether.......or not

The alternative is 'or not' by default.

[bettyellen]

305. I love you internally......

[Manifestor_of_Light]

310. Getting your dog "spaded".

Gee, I'm sorry that dear Fido is dead and gone, and buried......:banghead:

I heard a woman talk about "a great big painted muriel on the wall". :banghead: :banghead:

[Berry Cool]

312. Here are some more for you:

dribble instead of drivel
diffuse instead of defuse
"epitomy" (I see it on DU a lot)
"flack"
"lynchpin"
marquis instead of marquee
poo-poo instead of pooh-pooh
"sherbert"
vocal chords instead of vocal cords
wetted appetite instead of whetted appetite

And worst of all: "each more (adjective) or (adjective)er than the next" instead of "each more (adjective) or (adjective)er than the last"

[eppur_se_muova]

373. As I suspected, "vocal chords" results from confusion with geometrical chords ...

A line segment connecting two points on a circle without passing through the center is a chord, and this describes the shape of the vocal cords (folds). I thought perhaps "chord" was the medical term, since medical terms are derived from Latin and Greek, but according to Wikipedia ...

Vocal cords, a term commonly used to refer to the vocal folds, is also spelled 'vocal chords', possibly due to the musical connotations or to confusion with the geometrical definition of the word "chord". While both spellings are historically correct, standard American spelling is 'vocal cords'.<8> According to the Oxford English Corpus, contemporary writers opt for vocal chords instead of vocal cords 49% of the time.<9><10> The 'vocal chords' spelling is standard in the United Kingdom. Even in the United States, both variants can be found from early on, and it was only later on that American writers settled on 'vocal cords' as the standard version.<9>

My mom is always referring to "power chords", which makes her sound like a heavy metal guitarist.

[eppur_se_muova]

379. But I love Sherbert!

Expecially when he writes for the clarinet!

[theorbiter]

313. In Ohio...

at least in my region, people like to use "you was" "they was" or "was you". Drives me nuts!
Also annoying are phrases where noun and verb roles are reversed as in "pimp my ride".

[City Lights]

317. I can't stand it when a teevee anchor says, "take a listen" to introduce a

video or audio piece.

[Puglover]

322. This isn't so much a misuse of the English language

as much as a pet peeve.

Me:"Thank you"

Other person:"No problem"

What the hell ever became of "You're welcome"

[wtmusic]

349. .

:grr:

I like to respond with, "No problem here either!", a response which most find very confusing.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

368. It's the same in Spanish.

"de nada" -- It's nothing. (no big deal)

[Puglover]

370. I'm aware of that after 8 years of Spanish

and living 1/2 the year in Ecuador. Thanks. However idioms differ from language to language.

Also "de nada" or it's nothing isn't at all the same as "no problem".

[ramblin_dave]

325. Quality without a modifier

Example: That's a quality product.

Well, is it low quality or high quality?

[xynthee]

326. You forgot "definately" and trouper / trooper

I have been amazed lately at the number of people who confuse "breaks" and "brakes." Thank you, Toyota, for bringing that to my attention!

By the way, the people at Merriam-Webster are so weak! If people misuse a word enough (or invent a nonexistent word), they'll eventually just add it to their dictionary (not as slang or informal language, but as a regular ol' entry), e.g., "snuck".

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/snuck

Oh, there's another one: i.e. vs. e.g. (i.e. is very popular and most people seem to think it means "for example")

ARRGGGHHH! I have to try really hard to keep this kind of thing from bothering me. It could easily drive me insane if I let it. I never realized how terrible at grammar and spelling people were until the advent of the internets. I always KNEW most people were terrible spellers with terrible grammar, but WOW, I really had NO IDEA how bad it was!

Great thread. Bookmarking!

I hope I didn't make too many spelling and grammatical errors. Yes, I know I overuse exclamation points!! I will NEVER give up on overusing exclamation points!! They're practically my default punctuation now. If I start using periods at the ends of most of my sentences, it means I've completely given up on life. I'm not quite there yet!!

Oh, did you do quite / quiet?

OK, gotta go now or I'll be on this post all day.

[RUMMYisFROSTED]

332. Forte(fort) was mispronounced(fortay-diff. meaning) so much that it was changed in the dictionary.

[skipos]

334. "Cut to the chase" looks ok to me

http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/107300.html

[SidDithers]

335. There was a poster here who used "back peddle" in place of "backpedal"...

and then insisted she was correct because "peddle" was like selling something, so "back peddle" was like returning something, or going back.

Much hilarity ensued, as she grew more and more insistent she was correct.

Alas, she eats granite pizza now.

Sid

[Behind the Aegis]

358. Is that the same one you would "goat on" about things?

As opposed to "goad."

[Maru Kitteh]

339. Psychopants

Politician X has no idea what is happening out in the world because he surrounds himself with psychopants.

[RUMMYisFROSTED]

362. Boooooo!

[izzybeans]

340. This

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x7824706

[City Lights]

341. A couple more of my pet peeves:

ickspecially for especially
impordent for important

[wtmusic]

342. Well-healed nt

[arbusto_baboso]

356. "Let's get an expresso!"

What, are they making Italian coffee really, really fast in there?

[Manifestor_of_Light]

369. "helm" and "Task" as verbs.

AAAAIIIIEEEEE!!

Joe Director helmed his latest picture, "Cry of the Anguished Bunions". :banghead:

Joe Employee was tasked with getting pizza for the boss.

Why can't they say "Directed" instead of "helmed"???

And "Given the task of getting pizza"????

:banghead:

[MzNov]

374. 5:30 a.m. in the morning

I could poke myself with an icepick when I hear this from TV announcers

I'm not big on the redundant phrases.

[eppur_se_muova]

375. Even "Doonesbury" used "once and awhile" ...

of course, it was Zonker who used it, so maybe he's the goofball, not Trudeau. :D

[eppur_se_muova]

377. Confusion between ain't, hain't, and tain't ...

These are distinct words, with distinct usages!

hain't = have not
ain't = am/are not
tain't = it ain't (contraction)

So "we ain't got none" can also be phrased as "we hain't none", at the risk of sounding a little archaic. "We hain't done it" is clearly preferable to "we ain't done it", but the latter is actually the more common usage.

Great is the burden on those of use who insist on proper use of the language. ;)

[saberjet22]

382. three more

the whole nine yards--this still leaves you one yard short of a first down.
a good read--used by moronic book reviewers--equivalent to a restaurant critic saying "a good eat."
and the maddening new usage,-- it was so fun. this one drives me crazy and may cause me to commit mayhem some day.

[X_Digger]

387. Ahh, but 'whole nine yards'..

From my great-grandfather, that referred to a machinegun belt being that long. (He was too old to be drafted for WWII, but he did train for civilian defense in the CCC camp in War Eagle, WV.)

So giving it 'the whole nine yards' meant everything you had, all the ammunition you had available.

I know this interpretation isn't widely accepted, but I like it because it's personal.

[GA_ArmyVet]

383. My pet peeves are

its "mute" point (moot)

and

irregardless

[mia]

384. using "done" for "finished"

Are you done yet?

[slutticus]

386. I done done it

[tavalon]

390. Wow, I'm impressed

That's quite the long list. I personally like butt naked - I never understood what buck naked meant. I'm also partial to screwn, hugh!!11!1, I'm series and moran but that's just because I LIVE HERE!!!!!

LOL

[tavalon]

392. I enjoy a new turn of phrase from time to time

Not incorrect usage, just different. Kicking it old school amuses me as it usually refers to the time I was already an adult and yet, it's so ancient!!! Someone on another thread coined the term ego-boo for ego booster. I am going to appropriate that. I know I've kidnapped your concept here, but I wanted to throw that in.

[Kingofalldems]

397. The prisoners eck-scaped!

[demigoddess]

400. advise for advice.

there is a difference.

[Individualist]

401. People who say ya know once or more in every sentence make me crazy!

Then there was the woman who was telling me about her husband having tickylitis (diverticulitis). It took a lot of effort for me to keep from laughing.