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Every once and awhile something jumps out at me and bites me in the face.

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Raven Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 06:33 PM
Original message
Every once and awhile something jumps out at me and bites me in the face.
I just saw an ad on TV for Hallmark Cards. It showed a daughter visiting her mother for mother's day and then leaving. The mother then goes to her desk and picks up a card for another child. The voice then says something like "Give her something she can keep for Mother's Day. Give her a card."

What the hell is the message here? It's better to send a card to your parent than to visit? A card is better than being with someone you love? It seemed to me that Hallmark was putting down the visitor because she had to leave and suggesting that cards were better. Subtle, but nonetheless disturbing to me.
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Juneboarder Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 06:34 PM
Response to Original message
1. It's a commercial...
set the DVR so you don't have to watch them!! :)
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Miss_Underestimated Donating Member (239 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 06:36 PM
Response to Original message
2. I would say it's a form of neurolinguistics geared to make you feel the warmth
of a live visit when you send a hallmark card
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blaze Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 06:39 PM
Response to Original message
3. I thought it was same daughter from years gone by
and Mom was revisiting the memories of previous Mother's Days.
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Raven Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 06:42 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. Maybe it was and I'm not knocking kids who can's visit. I just
think that the suggestion by a card company that paper is better than flesh is disturbing.
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The Wielding Truth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 06:42 PM
Response to Reply #3
6. Me, too.
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uppityperson Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 06:42 PM
Response to Original message
5. yup, buy and mail a product rather than spending Atime.
after all, if the house burns down, or parent decides they have too much stuff and throw out the card, they can keep the memory of the time spent with their child.
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Divernan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 06:49 PM
Response to Original message
7. I absolutely agree with you.
Speaking as a Mom whose adult kids have nearly always lived far, far away (Indonesia, Ireland, Alaska, West Coast, East Coast, and/or Deep South over the decades (& I'm in PA), a mother's day card is not even on the list of how I want to have contact with them. An in-person vist is far and away preferred, followed by a phone call, followed by a newsy email, maybe some recent photos, followed by a thoughtful gift.

Greeting cards have become obscenely expensive and nobody in my family wastes money on them anymore.

As my Mom got into her 80's (she died at age 94), I visited her monthly, and then weekly (distance of 250 miles, one way).

As we get older, and lose old friends, same generation relatives, and neighbors - life can get pretty lonely. I'm trying to say, the older we get, the more it means to us to hear from our kids, and the more adult kids should keep in touch to make sure their parents are OK. So you younger DUers, I hope you keep in regular touch with your aging parents - all through the year, not just on Mother's or Father's days.
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malaise Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 07:04 PM
Response to Reply #7
12. Super post
:fistbump:
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blaze Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 08:08 PM
Response to Reply #7
15. Skype!! Skype!!! Skype!!!!
Mom (85) is a long way away.... but we talk nightly via Skype. We look at each other and smile and wave and share tears.

Of course it's nothing like being there in real.... but omigod I love Skype. And the fact that Mom can use it!!!!
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suffragette Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 06:52 PM
Response to Original message
8. Darn and I thought this was going to be a kitten thread
:P


Ah, well.

Agree with you about the absurdity of the commercial seemingly valuing the card over the live visit.
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branders seine Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 06:53 PM
Response to Original message
9. I'd say it's time to clean out the couch cushions then.
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Raven Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 06:56 PM
Response to Reply #9
10. I beg your pardon! My couch cushions are pristine!
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branders seine Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-27-10 05:56 PM
Response to Reply #10
18. Maybe it's hiding under the couch then...
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csziggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 07:01 PM
Response to Original message
11. I really find Hallmark and greeting cards strange
Edited on Mon Apr-26-10 07:02 PM by csziggy
My hubby just got a letter from his aunt. Nothing personal in it, just a mass produced appeal to all the relatives to send birthday cards to his cousin/her daughter for her fiftieth birthday. How sweet. Let's go out and spend money on an impersonal greeting card for a cousin he has not seen in probably twenty years and has no contact with.

This one is entirely up to hubby, if he chooses to do it.
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knowbody0 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 07:19 PM
Response to Original message
13. the whole hallmark thingie is over-rated imo
we need "professionals" to express our feelings to one another? it's buggered me my whole damn life. no gift is complete without a card?

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ellenfl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 08:07 PM
Response to Original message
14. i did not see any of what you saw.
i saw her daughter visiting her mother and giving her a card. after she left mom went back to look at the cards she has received through the years from her daughter. i didn't see any implication that a card was better than a visit, just that the card brought back the memories of past visits.

i guess that just illustrates how different someone else's perspective can be.

ellen fl
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applegrove Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 08:32 PM
Response to Original message
16. Wasn't Mothers' day invented by corporations?
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Quantess Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-26-10 08:39 PM
Response to Original message
17. I've never been a card person.
Their sentiment is wasted on me. I open it up, look to see if there is any personal message or cash, then throw it away. Here's a hint: save yourself $3 or $4 and tell me "happy birthday" in person or on the phone.
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SoCalDem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-27-10 06:56 PM
Response to Reply #17
19. same here.. I am not a card saver..but do appreciate those who are
When my sweet Aunt died, I found in her photo album, a handmade Valentine I sent her when I was about 7..

I have saved some letters, but cards leave me cold, unless someone writes in them:)
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