Ted Nugent Writes Beautiful Ode To ‘Herculean’ Sarah Palin, For TIME

[meegbear]

Somewhat famous rock ‘n’ roll wingnut Ted Nugent is a contributor to the hot new TIME 100 list, which we are too scared to check out in full. (Did Meghan McCain make it, or did Didier Drogba “kick her out” of the last spot? That is a soccer joke!) While Nugent, tragically, did not make this list (again, we don’t know, maybe he did!), he was awarded the prize of writing Sarah Palin’s entry, which begins like so: “If Sarah Palin played a loud, grinding instrument, she would be in my band.” Jesus.

Amazing that he was able to type such overwrought gibberish with only one hand:

She embraces the critical duty of we the people by participating in this glorious experiment in self-government. The tsunami of support proves that Sarah, 46, represents what many Americans know to be common and sensible. Her rugged individualism, self-reliance and a herculean work ethic resonate now more than ever in a country spinning away from these basics that made the U.S.A. the last best place. We who are driven to be assets to our families, communities and our beloved country connect with the principles that Sarah Palin embodies. We know that bureaucrats and, even more, Fedzilla, are not the solution; they are the problem. I’d be proud to share a moose-barbecue campfire with the Palin family anytime, so long as I can shoot the moose.

You’d think that at least one copy editor at TIME, upon reaching “We who are driven to be assets…”, would suggest to the higher ups, “Uh, can we just get Piper or whatever to write it instead?”

http://wonkette.com/415133/ted-nugent-writes-beautiful-ode-to-herculean-sarah-palin-for-time#more-415133#ixzz0mVkeMfcG

[boobooday]

1. We, who are driven to be asshats . . .

Oh wait, did I read that wrong?

:rofl:

[Cleita]

2. Ted's not paying attention. Sarah Palin has a loud, grinding instrument...

her voice.

[babylonsister]

3. Ted did many, many drugs in his heyday, I'm thinkin'. nt

[Sebastian Doyle]

8. He has always claimed otherwise

Says he never touched any drugs. Of course this is the guy who shit his pants (and wore them) for a week before reporting to the military recruiter for his draft notice, so take that denial for what it's worth.

[tularetom]

4. "rugged individualism, self-reliance and a herculean work ethic"? WTF?

Drivel like this is why Time is going down the shitter almost as fast as CNN.

Palin is possibly the laziest human being I've ever seen.

[Ganja Ninja]

19. The only thing "herculean" about her is her drive to cash in on her

extended 15 minutes of fame.

[Ken Burch]

5. That would be the herculean work ethic of the woman who put in HALF-DAYS as governor

(while collecting per-diem for working from her own home)before quitting half-way through her term?

Oh, and Ted...your sound sucked in the Seventies...it sucks now. Cat Scratch THAT, buddy!

[Enrique]

11. the six labors of Hercules? n/t

[NeedleCast]

6. "herculean work ethic?"

Didn't she quit after half a term as Governor because the shit was too hard and people were being mean to her?

[JuniperLea]

7. What lovely bookends...

TAWD better watch his step! I think someone has a crush on his wife;)

[wilt the stilt]

9. Hey Ted

you look like you just left a concentration camp. It looks like you would have a hard time bench pressing a 100lBs.

[paulsby]

13. real men squat and clean and jerk

not bench press ;p

hth

[wilt the stilt]

17. that's the joke

he couldn't even bench press.

[gratuitous]

10. But Sarah Palin does play a loud, grinding instrument

I haven't read a more apt description of that voice of hers from anyone. Well stated, Mr. Nugent.

However, it's apparent that he jumped the tracks in praising her "herculean work ethic." Didn't she quit her last job less than halfway through her commitment to it? She also seems to have a - shall we say - checkered career with respect to commitment, though I'm sure she remembers the tunes and all the words to all the fight songs of the various colleges she attended in pursuit of her degree (whatever that's in). Oh well, the 70s were definitely a time of over-indulgence in memory-impairing activities, and Mr. Nugent seems to be no exception.

[Enrique]

12. look out Todd

actually, just give up, Todd. You have no chance against the Nuge, just say goodbye to Sarah. She'll dump you even faster than she dumped Alaska.

[leftofcool]

14. And while you and Palin are sharing that moose bbq...

here's hoping that a nice well muscled grey wolf bites your face off!

[ismnotwasm]

15. Ted and Sarah sittin' in a tree...

They can stay up there.

[jaxx]

16. a herculean work ethic

Is that what they call quitting these days?

[BurtWorm]

18. The tsunami of support?

He must have been writing that under the influence of cat scratch fever.

[SoxFan]

20. Herc!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EmqngRDnIuk

[Blue_In_AK]

21. Herculean work ethic??!!

Ted, honey, she QUITS every job she holds. Legislators in Juneau took to wearing "Where's Sarah" buttons when she was governor.

[Vinca]

22. Hmmm . . . another owner of a Sarah Palin blow-up doll??

[Tsiyu]

23. f'in hilarious

"herculean work ethic." Yeah, takes a lot of work to flash your cleavage at the mouth-breathers.

TIME has been irrelevant for a long TIME. Haven't read it in years and couldn't give two shits who they are selling now, but this absolutely cracks me up.

it's like all the Losers prop each other up. they know they're outnumbered, but they also know as long as they are idiots, the other idiots will always embrace them. Instant friends.

What a tool Nugent is. :rofl:

[mitchum]

24. Someone is angling for a DP with Sarah and Todd...again