The Republican solution to the oil gusher:

[begin_within]

Cut taxes!

[swag]

1. for the top one percent of earners!

[FBI_Un_Sub]

2. Reduce regulations on drilling

[swag]

3. Let the Hidden Hand of the Free Market cap the well leaks!

[gratuitous]

4. Don't we have to invade someone, too?

I mean, if you're going to cut taxes, you should boost spending.

[The Magistrate]

5. Of Course,Sir: Venezuela....

[gratuitous]

8. Is it their turn again already?

Or did you just throw a dart?

[The Magistrate]

9. They Were Standing Sort Of Nearby, Sir, And Do Look Sort Of Brown....

What more could be required in this emergency, in which the dictates of the Commander and Chief cannot be doubted by good Americans?

[gratuitous]

10. All right, Venezuela it is!

They speak English there, right? Soooo tired of that Arabic jibber jabber.

[Drix]

6. The only solution is prayer.

It's God's will and punishment for homosexuals in Florida.

[G_j]

7. filibuster it?

[begin_within]

11. And if that doesn't work, they can always just deny that it's happening.

Solved global climate change, anyway.

[Cresent City Kid]

12. They'd offer a cash settlement to be divided up by all the victims

One Million Dollars!

[demosincebirth]

13. Shhhh, its not a gusher, its a "leak."