Morford:All kneel before the devil horns (Dio eulogy)

[n2doc]

y Mark Morford, SF Gate Columnist

Wednesday, May 19, 2010



Do not make the symbol lightly. Do not make the symbol in haste. Do not toss up the this eternal gesture at a Miley Cyrus concert lest you be instantly struck down by demonflame and cursed to walk the planet in shame forevermore. Only make the gesture if, and only if, you wish to thoroughly and totally rock. That is all.


MARK MORFORD

Ronnie James Dio died the other day, quietly succumbed to a relatively sudden onset of stomach cancer and up and left the planet in a blaze of stage fire, dragonsmoke and general metal awesomeness. Maybe you heard.

It was an abrupt end to a sort of stunning, nearly unprecedented 35-year career in hard rock megastardom, a shock that sent all flags of classic campy Bic-lighter rock n' roll greatness to half mast for at least a solid year, or until Ozzy Osbourne spontaneously combusts, whichever comes first.

It is quite possible you have no idea who Dio was, or you don't really care, or you think he and his various multiplatinum bands -- Rainbow, Black Sabbath, Dio -- were a bit of a long-haired crotch-rock musical circuslike joke. Or maybe you were all aswoon for Rick Springfield or the Go-Go's at the time when a post-Ozzy Sabbath 2.0 was cranking out some of the best hard-rock songs of all time ("Heaven & Hell," "Mob Rules," "Voodoo," "Die Young") circa 1980ish.

It's also possible you know just enough to know RJD was pretty much heavy metal personified, a tiny 5-foot-4-inch sorcerer with a mangy mane, demonic eyes and sly grin, all coupled to a simply huge, operatic voice, a diminutive powerhouse who prowled the stage like a feline elf and who was, it turns out, also finely intelligent and well spoken, an actual gentleman in a genre known all too well for its bombastic, monosyllabic doltbuckets. A rare thing indeed.



Read more: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/g/a/2010/05/19/notes051910.DTL

[Brickbat]

1. A reminder from the Metal Council

http://www.theonion.com/articles/metal-council-convenes-to-discuss-metal-hand-sign,1832/

From the story:

"I remember a time not long ago when the Devil Horns were reserved for only the most righteous of person, deed, or riff," Grand Elder Lemmy Kilmister said. "To see someone throwing the horns to his mate at the launderette because the clothes dryer came to a full stop just as he finished reading his copy of Circus... It breaks my heart."

Dio \m/

[RoyGBiv]

2. *This* should have been in Rolling Stone ...

... rather than that crap piece written by someone who probably was worshiping at the altar of Rick Springfield last Tuesday and had to go to YouTube to figure out who Dio was.

"monosyllabic doltbuckets" Yeah, I'll be stealing that I'm sure. :)

[Solly Mack]

3. K&R

[SidDithers]

4. Was never a huge RJD fan...

but Morford is one of my favourite columnists.

K&R.

Sid

[geek tragedy]

5. In his time, RJD was a Rainbow in the Dark. nt

[BakedAtAMileHigh]

6. "when you listen to fools, the mob rules"

True then, true now. Rock on, Ronnie.

[Odin2005]

7. RIP

[TwilightGardener]

8. What a nice tribute.

[myrna minx]

9. Rip...

[slampoet]

10. Well, At least Dio always could make me laugh, just by being himself.

[n2doc]

11. kick n/t

[n2doc]

15. kick n/t

[Union Yes]

12. The world just became slightly less evil. And that TOTALLY SUX!

RIP RJD.

You're a rainbow in the dark.

:evilgrin:

[Initech]

13. Neon Knights forever!

:headbang:

[flying rabbit]

14. RIP

"The world is full of kings and queens
Who blind your eyes and steal your dreams
Its heaven and hell, oh well"

Oh well..