Wonkette: Frat Boy Congress Caused Souder-Sex to Happen, Say Bible Ladies

[meegbear]

KEGGER AT THE CAPITOL!



Upon learning that family-values hero Mark Souder had resigned from Congress after admitting his extramarital abstinence, the marriage-sanctifying gals at Concerned Women for America — the Western Hemisphere’s most important public policy women’s organization, after Curves — were in despair, about men. Ultimately they put down their tissues down, though, and brought forth a proclamation in which they blame Souder’s affair on the U.S. Congress, a.k.a. “the frat house on the Hill.”

Penny Vance, who is the most-concerned of all the Concerned Women, describes the connection between Washington livin’ and Souder’s lovin’ in an emotional blog-prayer:

Those of us who have worked with Mark over the years know him to be a kind and thoughtful legislator. If Mark Souder is capable of sexual misconduct, it could happen to anyone. The frat house environment on Capitol Hill does nothing to encourage accountability. Most Members do not live with their families while they are working in D.C. during the week and have even ditched common rules of etiquette that even major corporations follow such as office doors with windows or careful examination of employee/boss interaction.

On Capitol Hill, marijuana grows where grass should be, and grain alcohol comes out of the faucets. Congressmen room with other congressmen, creating a sexual energy that leads them down the road to infidelity. King-sized charisma-pots like John Ensign and the other C Street Boyz peer-pressure folks into attending their raging kegger parties, which have directly led to the ends of hundreds of Congressional marriages. In such an environment, poor John Souder had no chance.

But now he’s expelled himself from the Garden of Nerdly Delights called Washington and can return to Indiana, where the only temptations are methamphetamine and corn.

http://wonkette.com/415505/frat-boy-congress-made-souder-sex-happen-says-bible-ladies#more-415505#ixzz0oOhebSe9

[SpiralHawk]

1. "It could happen to anyone." - D'oh

This is precisely why Americans have had a big, fat, steenkin bellyfull of Republicon Family Values finger-wagging sanctimony. Puh-lease.

The hypocritical pretense of these clowns -- currently underscored by the boinked-up Palin parents and, um, issue out pontificating-for-megabucks on abstinece -- is off the Disgust-o-meter. Everyone knows it. It's a sham without a shim.

Republicons can just take their phony, hypocritical holier-than-thou sanctimony and fornicate it -- they way they are fornicating everything else they come in contact with.

[sinkingfeeling]

8. Except Clinton. He had to be impeached for his weakness.

[Dappleganger]

2. Sign me up!!

"On Capitol Hill, marijuana grows where grass should be, and grain alcohol comes out of the faucets. "


:toast: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[emulatorloo]

4. "King-sized charisma-pots like John Ensign" keg parties is a deal breaker.

[IndianaJoe]

3. Maybe Randy Tobias can give him a job at Eli Lilly! n/t

Those painted women in DC were just too much of a temptation for the poor Hoosier.

[Bitwit1234]

5. And they also blamed

the fact that congressmen's offices don't have windows. I kid you not.

[Ian David]

6. Souder Blames DC For Sexual Misconduct

As most people know, the District of Columbia, along with being the home to everything political, is a city filled with monuments, museums, a subway that shuts down five hours too early, confusing diagonal streets named after states and a bunch of perilous traffic circles that some people say are designed to bedevil and confuse Tory invaders from the 18th century.

But what you probably don't know about Washington is that the whole city was designed by Masonic warlocks who laid out pentagrams and symbols all over the city in order to create a black-magic engine of pure animal sexuality to bewitch the minds of otherwise decent people, turning them into godless slaves to their horniest of impulses.

This is all coming to light, thanks to the resignation of America's Prince of Abstinence Education Mark Souder, who was caught in the District's sexy trap. He makes this glancingly clear in the retina-searing all-caps section of his resignation note, which will be remembered as this century's "Letter From A Birmingham Jail," where "Birmingham" is "Washington" and "Jail" is "my part-time aide's vagina."

IT HAS BEEN ALL CONSUMING FOR ME TO DO THIS JOB WELL, ESPECIALLY IN A DISTRICT WITH COSTLY, COMPETITIVE ELECTIONS EVERY TWO YEARS I DO NOT HAVE ANY SORT OF "NORMAL" LIFE - FOR FAMILY, FOR FRIENDS, FOR CHURCH, FOR COMMUNITY.TO SERVE HAS BEEN A BLESSING AND A RESPONSIBILITY GIVEN FROM GOD. I WISH I COULD HAVE BEEN A BETTER EXAMPLE. I SINNED AGAINST GOD, MY WIFE AND MY FAMILY BY HAVING A MUTUAL RELATIONSHIP WITH A PART-TIME MEMBER OF MY STAFF. IN THE POISONOUS ENVIRONMENT OF WASHINGTON DC, ANY PERSONAL FAILING IS SEIZED UPON, OFTEN TWISTED, FOR POLITICAL GAIN. I AM RESIGNING RATHER THAN TO PUT MY FAMILY THROUGH THAT PAINFUL, DRAWN-OUT PROCESS.

Right! Best flee from the 202, and its "costly, competitive elections" before you put your family through some sort of "painful, drawn-out process!"

Souder's take on the matter is ably echoed by the Concerned Women for America:

More:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/05/19/souder-blames-dc-for-sexu_n_581988.html?ref=twitter

[sinkingfeeling]

7. It's all their fault. They just didn't pray hard enough. I thought if you're a capital 'C'

christian, you had Jesus as your 'co-pilot' and he kept you from sinning.