JOIN US: The War on Christmas!

[Earth_First]

September 1st has become the *official* start of the war this year!

Currently, we are seeking soldiers to fight alongside the liberal agenda in order to overthrow the the 2010 holiday season...

Abandon your midterm-electioneering and join us for the REAL fight against America: CHRISTMAS!

Dust off your BAH HUMBUG! and join us in collaboration against the Christmas Agenda!!

Remember: It's only as merry as you allow it!

[muntrv]

1. I'll join when they tell me where in the Bible does it mention Christmas tree etiquette.

[luvspeas]

3. I like all the co-opted pagan-y parts of x-mas...

like lights and presents, can we keep those.

[northoftheborder]

17. hand made presents, trees, lights, cold weather is all I want for Christmas

[luvspeas]

20. yeah, I like that....

cures for the winter doldrums only.

[iris27]

23. Oh, but it does...LOL...

Jeremiah 10:2 KJV Thus saith the LORD, Learn not the way of the heathen, and be not dismayed at the signs of heaven; for the heathen are dismayed at them. 3* For the customs of the people are vain: for one cutteth a tree out of the forest, the work of the hands of the workman, with the axe. 4* They deck it with silver and with gold; they fasten it with nails and with hammers, that it move not. 5 They are upright as the palm tree, but speak not: they must needs be borne, because they cannot go. Be not afraid of them; for they cannot do evil, neither also is it in them to do good.

Christmas trees are against the Bible!

[HockeyMom]

24. That comes from the Pagan Winter Solstice

and of course the German "Tannenbaum". These Bible thumpers need to learn a little HISTORY of their own religion. If they don't know their own, why would they know/learn anybody else's?

[Morning Dew]

2. I'd like to help

but I am suffering from Post Tannenbaum Stress Disorder from the big Christmas battle last year.

[Earth_First]

5. There's an elixer for that...

:beer:

[Morning Dew]

12. It had better not be egg nog

(~);-}

[Ikonoklast]

15. I still have ornament shrapnel in my left leg.

What outfit were you in?

I was in the 33rd, "The Godless Atheists" Division.

We got pounded.

[Morning Dew]

25. I was 57th Treegrabber Brigade

By the 20th we were 64% replacements, waiting for support from the 82nd.

We never should have tried to take the Tree Lot by ourselves, it was manned by Boy Scouts.

I'm still feeling some shame for our failure.

[Ikonoklast]

26. It was a volunteer from the Lion's Club what got me.

I remember it like it was yesterday, Dec. 12, 2009.

Got our orders, moved out that evening. Everyone was in position waiting for the order.

We thought, look at those geezers in that empty used car lot, selling Christmas trees for charity.

Piece of cake.

Bunch of old guys standing around, drinking hot cider, easy pickings, right?



The tricky bastards. The tricky, tricky bastards.


It was all a trap, and we fell for it like a bunch of tyros.

They outflanked us from the right, and rolled us up.

By the time it was all over, we lost two entire squads to rock-hard fruit cakes, the Captain took a candy cane right in the head, and my leg was shredded.

If Cpl. Johnson hadn't thrown himself on that "Merry Christmas 1987" ornament, I would have been a goner.


Not this year.

I'm ready.

I'll not let the bravery of Cpl. Johnson be for naught.

[Morning Dew]

28. Wish I could rec your post.

That kind of bravery should be rewarded.



A friend of mine bought it in '04. Ambushed in a restroom by a mall Santa on break.

[Ikonoklast]

30. Oh, God, the Mall!

I...I...can't even talk about the Mall!






Many a good Christmas Warrior bought it on Black Friday, 2004, A Day That Will Live In Infamy.

It was a blood bath.


We knew it was just short of a suicide mission, we were all volunteers, we knew the risks, we knew the odds were against us, but...


They were just kids! I mean, us older guys knew it would be bad, really bad, but many of those kids were all rah-rah and gung-ho, they didn't know, they couldn't know...



Their screams still haunt me to this very day.

[TK421]

32. I just gotta say, that was probably the most entertaining exchange I think

I've seen on here...my face hurts from smiling :)

[Bucky]

4. Man, it seems like the War on Christmas comes earlier every year.

When I was a kid, I don't think we even thought about forcing Satanist humanism down the throats of the oppressed Christian minority until after Veteran's Day.

[Fire1]

6. I'll give you a K&R and I'll probably be the only one you get. LOL!

[Fire1]

7. Wow! You got 2! lol!

[Earth_First]

8. It's going to be a fiesty one this year...

The natives are restless!

[Initech]

9. I've got your jingle bells right here!

[msanthrope]

10. Damnit, the War-On-Christmas starts earlier and earlier every damn year

doesn't it?

I just barely finished with my July 4th desecration of the Flag and am still planning my 9/11 mockery of Ground Zero....

It's just too much...

[Earth_First]

11. WOOT! Our first UNREC!!!

:fistbump:

[okieinpain]

13. i like christmas myself, great time of the year. but I'll k/r your post

if you want me to.

[nadinbrzezinski]

14. Now we have an official date?

But O'Lielly beat you to it, yes he went there a couple months ago. I made my job this year to take care of Rudolph!

[d_r]

16. I love your enthusiasm

but I'm sorry, when it is still over 90 degrees outside I'm not thinking Xmas.

[TheKentuckian]

18. I love Christmas but I had to hit you a rec for the shits and giggles

[L0oniX]

19. Attention shoppers: Christmas has been canceled due to the depression. That is all.

[Kerrytravelers]

21. Where do I sign?

I've been waiting since last December 26th to oppress the Christian minority.

I'm going to start by doing this to all their cats:



Of course, I'm sending these guys over to sing Christmas Carols later on:

[handmade34]

22. WWJB?

Time again for "What Would Jesus Buy?"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sGi21YQFjMM

http://wwjbmovie.com/save.html

[Toucano]

27. Sorry. I never start my war on Christmas activities until Thanksgiving.

I'm a traditionalist.

:P

[Renew Deal]

29. I'm willing to join, but I plan on celebrating Christmas and saying Merry Christmas

to people I know celebrate. Does that disqualify me?

[badgerpup]

31. I say "Happy Christmas"...

...just to mess with people's heads. :evilgrin:

It's what they say in England, the sentiment is the same, just the wording is a bit different.

[TalkingDog]

33. The Spousal Unit made this for my mother years ago when she complained about all the X-Mas chaos

feel free to copy and add appropriate changes if necessary (just credit FloatingHead Graphics)