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xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 11:56 AM
Original message
I've learned today that lgbtiq people can't really know
Their own minds about bigotry - the kinds of bigotry they face -
And that people in leadership positions
Who don't act like friends of the community
Really are.

It takes heteros to interpret our struggle for us.

You learn something new every day.
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VMI Dem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 11:58 AM
Response to Original message
1. You need to learn how to tell the difference between pretend homophobia and the real thing.
Only us straight folk can show you the difference.
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xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 12:12 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. What ever would we do without straights telling us to
Sit down, stand up -- oh go vote this way while we soft peddal your rights?

Oh and while we're getting directions -
Make sure we donate to our straight
Advocates.
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gratuitous Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 12:17 PM
Response to Original message
3. Well, you're so twisted anyway
That you can't distinguish between getting bashed and the loving caress of a corrective punch in the nose. Fortunately for all of us, the good people of Westboro Baptist Church are here to explain it.
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xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 12:29 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. Westboro?!?! - shit westboro will have to stand in line
Behind all our allies.
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mitchtv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 12:30 PM
Response to Original message
5. therfore we had better do what they say
wouldn't want to alienate the people we need to gain our equality for us. Always be polite
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xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 12:36 PM
Response to Reply #5
7. Well polite, vote for them, give them money
And don't believe my lying eyes when they act in bad faith.
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 12:34 PM
Response to Original message
6. I'm going to ask your permission before I reply to your OP
If you want me to stay out, I will.

But, I just have a question for you... That's all.
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xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 12:41 PM
Response to Reply #6
9. I don't care if you do. But really where do you straight people
Get all these goddamned questions for gay folks?

Is there a book some place?

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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 12:42 PM
Response to Reply #9
10. Deleted message
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
 
MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 12:43 PM
Response to Reply #9
11. Well, I take from your reply that my presence is not welcome
Never mind.

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Touchdown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:17 PM
Response to Reply #9
20. Your "Apparent" lack of concern made Daddy go out for cigarettes and not come back!
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xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:22 PM
Response to Reply #20
22. ...
:spray:
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VMI Dem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:23 PM
Response to Reply #20
23. OMG.
:spank:
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LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:32 PM
Response to Reply #20
26. It's probably just about that fricking poll anyway
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walldude Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:38 PM
Response to Reply #9
28. Yeah there is but you aren't allowed to read it...
It's called "Organizing Your Closet".... ;)
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LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:39 PM
Response to Reply #28
29. OMFG
hahahahaha
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xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:44 PM
Response to Reply #28
30. ...
:applause: well played.
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myrna minx Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 02:29 PM
Response to Reply #28
40. LOL.
:applause:
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unapatriciated Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 08:52 PM
Response to Reply #28
55. .
:spray: :rofl:
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closeupready Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 02:34 PM
Response to Reply #9
43. Many heterosexuals think that gay people want them and love them.
Edited on Wed Aug-25-10 02:35 PM by closeupready
I don't know why that is, since, at least as far as I'm concerned, I have virtually no heterosexual friends, and I don't date guys on the downlow. And seeing heterosexual couples fondle and masturbate each other publicly makes me sick, it is NOT a turn-on. duh. I'm GAY.
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Touchdown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 05:35 PM
Response to Reply #43
52. Yeah, like these guys.
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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 12:37 PM
Response to Original message
8. Deleted message
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
 
xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 12:46 PM
Response to Reply #8
13. I have come to believe that lgbtiq people really
Are Strangers in their own 'country'.

Mostly get along ok with 'allies'
Right up until it's about elections.
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marmar Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 12:43 PM
Response to Original message
12. Of course.....Majorities always know what's best for the minority, dontchaknow.
nt


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xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 12:58 PM
Response to Reply #12
14. My bad. Nt
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bobbolink Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 02:20 PM
Response to Reply #12
37. That's the nature of oppression.
ALL oppression.
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:01 PM
Response to Original message
15. i had an opinion on same sex marraige. what i learned. shut up and listen. nt
Edited on Wed Aug-25-10 01:04 PM by seabeyond
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LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:33 PM
Response to Reply #15
27. +1
:pals:
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Change has come Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-26-10 12:16 AM
Response to Reply #15
64. This is why I adore you.
It really is. Heck, I'm gay, and I had to shut up listen too!
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jgraz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:09 PM
Response to Original message
16. I have several gay friends, so clearly I know what's best for all y'all.
It's just a coincidence that what's best for you happens to coincide with my own political agenda.
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Touchdown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:12 PM
Response to Original message
17. I don't know about you, but I feel so well cared for!
I'm just "apparently" ungrateful! So we should all be good little boys and girls and let the straight grownups fix us mac n cheese.



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HillWilliam Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:14 PM
Response to Original message
18. I'm guessing from our OP's
we're on the same wavelength. I didn't say anything at all for the longest time. The posts to which several of us have been referring have gotten more and more offensive (and brazen) over time.

How anyone can be so blind to the fact that we have been repeatedly betrayed, I just can't understand. Is it that they misunderstand our history? Is it that they don't understand the real day-to-day danger we live in -- like we can easily get dead for the offense of walking around? Injustice anywhere is injustice everywhere. What part of that concept do they not understand?

Or is is that they don't give a fuck and they're trolling?

I don't know.

It would have been further remiss of me to have remained silent. That's all I know.

No, I do know one more thing. The needling, the baiting, the jabbing needs to stop. A cease and desist is in order.

Thanks for the K/R on my OP and here's a K/R on yours. Stay visible, my friend.
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Kurt_and_Hunter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:15 PM
Response to Original message
19. The new wallpaper in the closet wasn't good enough?
Sheesh... maybe we can find a closet-sized pony for you.

(joke)
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xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:19 PM
Response to Reply #19
21. ok - that just sounds like you're flirting with me.
:rofl:
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Mimosa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:29 PM
Response to Reply #19
24. LOL That's what I was thinking yesterday.
Yesterday was an eye-opening and hurtful day for me on D.U.

I've basically never discussed my sexual identity on forums. I'm a private, old-fashioned person in that way, partly because when people think that's what they know of a person, they don't perceive much else. I used to think that some gays on D.U. went 'over the top' and exaggerated the homophobia (a word I seldom use) by some members of D.U.. I was wrong. There's implied scapegoating and a lot of vitriol.

That 'Obama's Thought Crimes' topic was baiting. I don't believe in the concept of thought crimes, I doubt most Democrats do. I do not believe President Obama is a homophobe. I don't think he's a bigot at all. He's merely a disappointing politician. And there seem to be D.U. members who are running around telling gay members 'you can't talk about that.' They think our opinions are dangerous to 'message.'

The same people don't like that many of us have expressed our disappointment with the wasted opportunity to really provide health care for Americans. Yes, we accept it was done. But we don't have to like what was done.

If we speak up enough maybe we can stop another betrayal before it happens and gets called progress.




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LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:32 PM
Response to Original message
25. We don't even know about the legal discrimination we face
or the laws that allow that discrimination. It's all some kind of GLBT make Believe World.

:wtf:
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libnnc Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:44 PM
Response to Reply #25
31. And who cares that we have to fork over extra jack
to retain legal help in drafting the flimsy paperwork that may or may NOT guarantee our rights depending on what state we're stuck in...

We're all made of extra money, ya know. We can afford that AND showering DU, the DCCC and the DNC with our extra cash every time they beg for it.


We're all walking, talking, pooping GAY-TMs apparently.
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xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:45 PM
Response to Reply #25
32. apparently. nt
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dickthegrouch Donating Member (838 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-26-10 10:16 AM
Response to Reply #32
65. No More Money for Well-disguised Bigots
(The text of the letter I sent in reply to Tim Kaine's entreaty yesterday)

Re: Boehner's Millions

Mr Kaine,

The bad news: I'm not giving you any more money.
The good news: It would be a cold day in hell before I gave the Republicans any money.

Better news: When Obama and the whole democratic party get clear on the difference between religious marriage and State-sponsored Marriage, and get clear on what "Separation of church and State" means and on what Equal Protection means, I'll resume donations.

By "get clear", I mean mean get out of the way of same-sex couples who want to get married, repeal DADT and DoMA and bring the same constitutional analysis to same-sex Marriage as went into the defense of the proposed Muslim Mosque near Ground zero in NYC.

That a Black Man can see the need to be neutral in the blatantly religious discrimination of the mosque opponents and not be able to draw a parallel with the blatantly religious discrimination in terms of marriage equality is pathetic and disgusting.

I will ONLY resume donations after DADT, DoMA repeal and a real guarantee of equality. Don't bother asking until then.

Dick
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HillWilliam Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:59 PM
Response to Reply #25
34. Apparantly we don't at all
even though I've had to defend a will twice in my lifetime. Lost one (lost everything), won one (came out even). I've been fired for being gay even though my job performance and reviews were tops, zero complaints (except "your kind" can't work here). Nah, we know nothing about it at friggin' all.

That's why (thanks for the suggestion) I went ahead and wrote it out into an OP once again.

Y'know what? I no longer care if anyone else is edified. I've got it out and *I* feel better. The wise will understand and reflect. Those who don't understand by now never will.
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LiberalAndProud Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 09:21 PM
Response to Reply #34
57. Just wanted to say that others are edified.
Some have been very eloquent. I appreciate the education.


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LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-26-10 02:29 PM
Response to Reply #34
67. I was fired for the same thing
Edited on Thu Aug-26-10 02:29 PM by LostinVA
International company. 1991. I called Corporate and got them to change my status to quit.
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redwitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 02:09 PM
Response to Reply #25
35. Yes but your window treatments are to die for!
People are exhausting and exasperating. Human nature: What we were put here to rise above.

I just came back from manning (womaning?) the Dem booth at the County Fair. What an eye opener! Met my first honest to God teabagger. I am still pissed off. He was loud, ignorant, rude and a close talker. Or shouter actually. I asked him to leave finally, I lasted about 10 minutes. You just can't fix stupid. That being said, I think most people mean well, they just haven't got things very well thought out.

There is way too much good change to achieve and I am weary.
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myrna minx Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 02:32 PM
Response to Reply #25
42. You aren't even aware of the imaginary, invented out of whole cloth laws that
have been passed to protect you. :rofl:
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QC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 05:23 PM
Response to Reply #42
48. Quick, somebody copy 'n paste that list again! n/t
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LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 05:32 PM
Response to Reply #42
50. I had no idea until today I was a Federal protected class
:wtf:
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QC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 05:34 PM
Response to Reply #50
51. It's astounding how little we know about our own lives and issues.
Thank God there are so many helpful straight people around to remind us to shut up and sit down and stop demanding ponies.
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QC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 01:47 PM
Response to Original message
33. The usual pattern for discussions of LGBT issues on this site has always been
for straight people to line up and tell us to sit down and shut up while they explain our lives and issues to us.

That's nothing new, though it is uglier these past few years than it used to be.
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Duncan Grant Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 02:12 PM
Response to Original message
36. I've learned that social and economic justice for LGBT people is a commodity.
Our civil and cultural equality requires "payment" of some sort. And while LGBT people are required to deliver their end of the bargain, our political allies are not.




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libnnc Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 02:23 PM
Response to Reply #36
39. We're just money machines.
Gay-TM CashPoints.

I'm pretty sick of it.
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Hell Hath No Fury Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 02:22 PM
Response to Original message
38. It's just a song! It's just an invocation!
:crazy: :eyes: You guys have gotten shit on and told to essentially STFU so often IRL and here it is embarrassing.

I think we will look back on these days and view those who pushed forward and made the change happen as heroes and those who were too timid as sad, cowardly people.

And I, for one, will include O in that last bunch.
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closeupready Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 02:31 PM
Response to Original message
41. You're such a good little toadie.
Don't you feel better now, knowing how much heterosexuals put your interests first when they put their interests first? :hi: :sarcasm: :eyes:
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ThomCat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 02:53 PM
Response to Original message
44. That seems to be a common opinion,
and a more or less official policy in determining what is and isn't homophobic.

Most straight people absolutely don't trust us to know what is homophobic. Even among people who support our rights, we're apparently just overly sensitive, overly dramatic queers who are going to inconvenience straight people too much by screaming too loudly for our rights. :(

We just need to back off and listen to straight people. They apparently know better than us. :eyes:
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xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 03:14 PM
Response to Reply #44
45. it's ironic -- or something. nt
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myrna minx Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 10:50 PM
Response to Reply #44
61. Thom - I haven't seen you for quite some time.
Edited on Wed Aug-25-10 10:51 PM by myrna minx
:hug: It's good to see you. I hope you're well.
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ThomCat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-26-10 02:27 PM
Response to Reply #61
66. Hi Myrna Minx!
:loveya:

:hug:

I don't post as often as I used to.

Partially for health reasons. I spend a lot of time now in bed because of pain and fatigue.

But partially because this just isn't so very good place for anyone who is an outspoken minority. This place only claims to be mostly, somewhat in favor of equal rights. But very little backs up that claim, and a lot contradicts it.

So, like a whole lot of people, I've sort of drifted away. Much of the time that I used to spend at DU I found can be better spent doing something else or talking to people somewhere else.

I hope you are doing well! :hug:

It's good to see you too!

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RoseMead Donating Member (953 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 03:18 PM
Response to Original message
46. K&R
Kicking for all the ungrateful, uppity gay people who don't know when to sit down and shut up.

I love you all. :hug:
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NMMNG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 03:21 PM
Response to Original message
47. It took you until today to learn that?
:P
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truedelphi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 05:27 PM
Response to Original message
49. You can count me as one straight person that
Doesn't tell gay community people what to do.

I regret this - but over the years it has been proven that my "gaydar" is so far off, that I flirt with men every other person in town knows are gay.

My son has the same affliction. He really thought this handsome bloke in a Chicago upscale eatery was buying him dinner, drinks and presents because he wanted to be friends.

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Autumn Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 06:10 PM
Response to Original message
53. All I have to say is
:hug: It's not supposed to be this way.
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Odin2005 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 08:44 PM
Response to Original message
54. K&R
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unapatriciated Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 09:12 PM
Response to Original message
56. You are in good company, many of us don't know our own minds.
we are told to sit down and shut up while they make decisions that affect our lives.
HCR
SS
Civil Rights

fortunately, I come from a large family and have no problem shouting down those that hold bigoted or flawed positions. I will not sit down nor will I shut up.
Marriage is a civil right some times confused with a religious rite. It has been in existence long before religion decided to endorse it in order to grow their flock.
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ruggerson Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 09:21 PM
Response to Original message
58. We're also very impolite, which I understand "alienates" our "allies"
we must learn to be respectful and know our place when quietly requesting that we be granted full citizenship.
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QC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 09:27 PM
Response to Reply #58
60. We must stop stomping our feet, I learned today.
Clearly, it is time for us to put on our big girl panties.
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OhioChick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 09:23 PM
Response to Original message
59. K&R
:hug:
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amborin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-25-10 10:56 PM
Response to Original message
62. knr
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grantcart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-26-10 12:07 AM
Response to Original message
63. Well straights are very good at figuring out other people's emotions and feelings

That is why there is virtually no divorce among straight couples.
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