What is going on with the suicide of gay youth

[dsc]

For much of this country the school year isn't even a month old yet and we have had four seperate cases of kids bullied for either being gay or being perceived as such. Justin Aaberg of Minnesota, Asher Brown of Texas, Billy Lucas of Indiana, and now Seth Walsh of California. I just don't know what to say about this. Kid, after kid, after kid, after kid literally being bullied to death and as far as I can tell nothing at all is changing. How many dead kids will be enough? I am doing my best at my school but no matter what, it still apparently will happen. We had a pretty intense meeting of the GSA I advise today. Kids whose parents barely tolerate them. a kid who is afraid of being thrown out if she comes out, and kids getting called names several times a day. I sometimes just get so tired of this. If you are a parent tell your kid you love them no matter what. Ask your kid how school is going. Watch for mood changes and hiding in their rooms. If you are a kid, know the bullying won't go on forever. It will get better. This just needs to stop.

[Drale]

1. I'm sorry if this sounds horrible

but I think one of the problems is that kids today are to sensitive. I got bullied everyday in elementary and grammar school, but I always knew that I was better then them and that I would have a more successful life than them. I was right, two of my former bullies are in prison for murder and one of them was killed by police when he tried to pull a gun during a failed drug deal. Now its horrible that one of them died but my point is you just need to suck it up, because the universe tends to even things out in the end.

[The Philosopher]

5. That's a horrible thing to say

You're a completely ignorant person. Just because you survived your bullying doesn't mean others are going through the same kind of bullying. These kids aren't you. They're not going to respond the same as you would. Instead of telling them to suck it up, people should be adults and DO SOMETHING.

What kind of Democrat, or sane person, tells children to suck it up? Would you tell the poor that? Rape victims? The wrongfully accused and imprisoned? Would you say it to a woman who is constantly sexually harassed?

[FreeState]

6. Wow - blame the fucking victims!

That's beyond messed up. Gay kids often can't even turn to their parents for support. Your trivializing their lives and reality and I find that disgusting.

Unless your gay this very likely to go over your head - part of being bullied as a gay youth is being told to stop acting like a sissy and stand up for yourself- that sentiment is pure homophobia IMA.

[MattBaggins]

14. This right here

The biggest problem with kids getting bullied is they often have no one to turn to. This is a tenfold problem for homosexual kids.

[Odin2005]

8. BULL-FUCKING-SHIT!!!

[donheld]

11. Buddy, you need to walk a mile in our shoes

before you run your mouth about sucking it up. You obviously have no clue.

[Bluebear]

16. +

[devilgrrl]

13. Come off of it. Not everone is you.

:crazy:

[Bluebear]

15. Yeah, they're just 'to' sensitive. All their fault.

'you just need to suck it up'

Idiot.

[David Zephyr]

2. Excellent message.

Even here in "tolerant" California, the issue of bullying has still not risen to the level of attention it deserves by the public, the policy makers, the media.

This goes on every second of every day in schools across this country. Fat kids, gay kids, skinny kids, disabled kids, "ugly" kids, unfashionably dressed kids, poor kids, stuttering kids, kids with birthmarks, and on and on.

And I hate it.

Thanks for your excellent message.

[The Philosopher]

3. I don't know the stats

But I think most of it is that everyone is becoming more aware of it now. Now if we can just do something meaningful with that awareness, things will significantly improve.

If I had my way, a parent's bigotry would be illegal toward their children until 18 (or 21). But a lot of people would bitch about that.

[KT2000]

7. Agree - it is a big political issue

with DADT and marriage, there are probably many children hearing some awful comments from their parents. Children feel emboldened to abuse others, especially in groups, when their parents appear to sanction it.

[merqz]

9. I agree too. I'd like to see some stats

exactly how prevalent IS this? I know that the US (a stark contrast with our homicide rate) has a relatively low homicide rate in general.

Is there truly an epidemic of gay suicides? I knew two kids who committed suicide in my high school and college years. Neither were gay as far as any of us knew, and they certainly weren't bullied as such.

Any young person's suicide is a tragedy. But what exactly ARE the stats? We see this with all sorts of issues. I see people say "X is becoming more common all the time", then I look at stats and see it's actually the opposite (I've seen that with murder rates, etc.). There are millions of gay kids in schools nationwide. How many commit suicide because of bullying?

It's kind of like school shootings. Yes, they are tragic, but kids are still statistically WAY safer in school than outside it - whether that is driving home OR in the home. Far more kids drown swimming during summer vacation than ever die in school shootings, for example.

[The Philosopher]

10. Long Reply

Well, I meant that I didn't know the historical trend of LGBT suicide, that if it it's more prevalent now than years ago or if it's relatively the same. However, I've never questioned that LGBT Youth are more at risk for suicide and that more actually succeed than their straight counterparts.

Why? Because you're not safe anywhere. Not at school, not at church, not at home. Unless you're straight and fit the gender norms, you're stigmatized. And there's never a stigmatization that's harmless. You're constantly bombarded by what I'm lightly terming disapproval. You're not only imagining the hate of your peers and family, but you're risking actual hate as well. If some Conservative or Christian douche bag comes up to you and questions you about it, "Are you really hurting?" some people can't point to any specific signs that a straight person would look for. For many children, simply having a religious life is enough. Or having a straight marriage.

Imagine this: you come to school, you're a male, you're on the football team, running back, and you're breaking records. Everyone loves you. Then imagine coming through your school's doors one morning to be met by the Principal and being told, "You can't come dressed like that. Go home and change into a proper skirt and blouse." Oh yeah, that's right, you're being forced to dress like the opposite sex. And your parents are siding with the Principal, there's no legal resource for you, and your peers are pressuring you to get into the skirt. If you don't, you not only lose your family and friends, but you're not allowed to go to school no matter what contributions you can make.

That's what it's like for transgender kids. At one point do you think they think to themselves, "Oh, it's okay. It's sensible what they ask of me. I can't forget my silly fantasies and do what I'm told?"

Your question does what everyone does to LGBT youth everyday: forces them into heteronormitivity. These youths are not straight kids. There's often no place for them to go. They get bullied, they can't tell a teacher. Many have to take the bullying because if they speak up, they feel they risk admitting that they're queer. This is not regular harassment; it's actual suffocation.

Any Google search would've turned up the answers to your questions. Here's two links I found that link to studies:

http://gaylife.about.com/od/gayteens/a/gaysuicide.htm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teenage_suicide_in_the_United_States#LGBT_youth

A resource I implore you to peruse is the Trevor Project website. Read the "Letters to Trevor" section. You'll come to understand why LGBT suicide is treated the way it is.

[izquierdista]

4. Maybe more reporting of it?

I know when I was in high school, teens who committed suicide were never gay. Gay still meant happy or cheerful, like the apparel that was donned for Christmas. No, they were 'depressed' or 'troubled', not happy or cheerful.

Maybe more reporting will make other teens aware of it and it will also make them aware that it gets better: http://www.youtube.com/user/itgetsbetterproject

[Kievan Rus]

12. I'd venture a guess and say that it's (finally) getting sufficient exposure