Please review my editorial on Lariam for spelling,grammer and content

[w8liftinglady]

as always,I really appreciate it.


Just when you think you have seen it all,more examples of our "support of the troops" makes itself known. When profit is the motive behind deception,that makes it that much more heinous.This week,let's look at the anti-malarial drug Lariam.

Lariam was approved by the FDA in 1989 as an anti-malarial drug with production by Roche Pharmaceuticals,a Swiss pharmaceutical company.As a coincidence,Roche gained rights to Tamiflu production from Gilead Pharmaceuticals,chaired by one Donald Rumsfeld(remember this).As early as 1995,researchers began warning physicians about prescription of Lariam,instructing them to avoid patients with known psychiatric disorders and epilepsy,as there were serious side effects in this subset of patients.

Lariam was widely prescribed to troops going to Iraq and Afghanistan.Reports began surfacing regarding increases in suicides and homicides in troops with no previously diagnosed psychiatric disorders.As troops were redeployed,these instances increased.In 2003,Senator Dianne Feinstein asked Secretary of Defense Rumsfeld to review the administration of Lariam due to increasing neuropsychiatric side effects seen in the troops.The DoD halted the administration of Lariam to troops stationed in Iraq,as the CDC recommendation for this region was mosquito repellant...no drugs indicated.In Afghanistan,Lariam continued to be administered until 2009-even though medications that had less complications-and were less expensive-had been available the whole time.

As time goes by,the full effects of Lariam remain to be seen.The incidence of suicides are increasing at a rapid rate,as well as aggressive behaviors,homicidal attempts and other neuropsychiatric complications.Is Lariam yet another cause of the trauma seen by those who served? Don't let it become another Agent Orange or Depleted Uranium-only to be swept under the rug by a careless nation. Insist that our Senators and Representatives act in their constituents' best interests and sponsor further research by independent medical facilities.If you have a family member who served in Iraq and Afghanistan after 2001,as well as a family member who may have traveled out of the country who experienced these symptoms,I suggest you educate yourself by visiting http://www.lariaminfo.org/ .Our troops can't wait forever for a grateful nation to refresh their collective memories.

[Bobbieo]

1. Beak up Paragraphs 2, 3 and 4 for readability. Makes for a better layout .

[Obamanaut]

2. It may be my screen, but it looks like there are no spaces after most

of the punctuation marks.

[w8liftinglady]

3. ok, try this:

"support of the troops" makes itself known. When profit is the motive behind deception,that makes it that much more heinous.This week,let's look at the anti-malarial drug Lariam.


Lariam was approved by the FDA in 1989 as an anti-malarial drug with production by Roche Pharmaceuticals,a Swiss pharmaceutical company. As a coincidence,Roche gained rights to Tamiflu production from Gilead Pharmaceuticals,chaired by one Donald Rumsfeld(remember this). As early as 1995,researchers began warning physicians about prescription of Lariam,instructing them to avoid patients with known psychiatric disorders and epilepsy,as there were serious side effects in this subset of patients.


Lariam was widely prescribed to troops going to Iraq and Afghanistan. Reports began surfacing regarding increases in suicides and homicides in troops with no previously diagnosed psychiatric disorders. As troops were redeployed,these instances increased. In 2003,Senator Dianne Feinstein asked Secretary of Defense Rumsfeld to review the administration of Lariam due to increasing neuropsychiatric side effects seen in the troops. The DoD halted the administration of Lariam to troops stationed in Iraq,as the CDC recommendation for this region was mosquito repellant...no drugs indicated. In Afghanistan,Lariam continued to be administered until 2009-even though medications that had less complications-and were less expensive-had been available the whole time.


As time goes by,the full effects of Lariam remain to be seen. The incidence of suicides are increasing at a rapid rate,as well as aggressive behaviors,homicidal attempts and other neuropsychiatric complications. Is Lariam yet another cause of the trauma seen by those who served? Don't let it become another Agent Orange or Depleted Uranium-only to be swept under the rug by a careless nation. Insist that our Senators and Representatives act in their constituents' best interests and sponsor further research by independent medical facilities. If you have a family member who served in Iraq and Afghanistan after 2001,as well as a family member who may have traveled out of the country who experienced these symptoms,I suggest you educate yourself by visiting http://www.lariaminfo.org / . Our troops can't wait forever for a grateful nation to refresh their collective memories.

[Bobbieo]

4. No - What you have done is go 3 spaces between paragraphs.

1.
Stay with the 2 spaces but break your the paragraphs as well.

2.
Paragraph 2 -Start a new paragraph with -
"As early as 1995 etc"

Paragraph 3 - "As troops were redeployed etc"
"The DOD etc"

Paragraph 4 "Is lariam another etc"
"If you have a famiy member etc"
"Our troops can't wait etc.

Make a new paragraph when you change thoughts or subject matter.

3.
Also always make a space after punctuation marks -

"Support of the troops" makes itself known. When profit is the motive behind deception, that makes it much more henious. This week, let's look at the anti-malarial drug Lariam.

Roche Pharmaceuticals, a Swiss - etc.

[w8liftinglady]

6. Ok,how about now( I added one line,as well)

Just when you think you have seen it all,another example of "support of the troops" makes itself known. When profit is the motive behind deception,that makes it that much more heinous. This week,let's look at the anti-malarial drug Lariam.

Lariam was approved by the FDA in 1989 as an anti-malarial drug with production by Roche Pharmaceuticals,a Swiss pharmaceutical company. As a coincidence,Roche gained rights to Tamiflu production from Gilead Pharmaceuticals,chaired by one Donald Rumsfeld(remember this).

As early as 1995,researchers began warning physicians about prescription of Lariam,instructing them to avoid patients with known psychiatric disorders and epilepsy,as there were serious side effects in this subset of patients.

Lariam was widely prescribed to troops going to Iraq and Afghanistan. Reports began surfacing regarding increases in suicides and homicides in troops with no previously diagnosed psychiatric disorders.From 2003 through 2005, Fort Bragg reported multiple cases of suicides,murders and domestic violence-many of which were finally attributed to Lariam. As troops were redeployed,these instances increased. In 2003,Senator Dianne Feinstein asked Secretary of Defense Rumsfeld to review the administration of Lariam due to increasing neuropsychiatric side effects seen in the troops.

The DoD halted the administration of Lariam to troops stationed in Iraq,as the CDC recommendation for this region was mosquito repellant...no drugs indicated. In Afghanistan,Lariam continued to be administered until 2009-even though medications that had less complications-and were less expensive-had been available the whole time.

As time goes by,the full effects of Lariam remain to be seen. The incidence of suicide is increasing at a rapid rate,as well as aggressive behaviors,homicidal attempts and other neuropsychiatric complications.

Is Lariam yet another cause of the trauma seen by those who served? Don't let it become another Agent Orange or Depleted Uranium-only to be swept under the rug by a careless nation. Insist that our Senators and Representatives act in their constituents' best interests and sponsor further research by independent medical facilities.

If you have a family member who served in Iraq and Afghanistan after 2001,as well as a family member who may have traveled out of the country who experienced these symptoms,I suggest you educate yourself by visiting http://www.lariaminfo.org / .

Our troops can't wait forever for a grateful nation to refresh their collective memories.

[muriel_volestrangler]

5. A couple of grammar points:

"more examples of our "support of the troops" makes itself known"
should be
"another example of our "support of the troops" makes itself known"
or
"more examples of our "support of the troops" make themselves known"
(I'd say the singular version is better - your article is saying Lariam is one example)

and

"The incidence of suicides are increasing at a rapid rate"
should be
"The incidence of suicides is increasing at a rapid rate"
since the subject of the sentence is 'the incidence', which is singular.

The content looks excellent.

[w8liftinglady]

9. Thanks-I hate for the content to look crappy because of the grammer

[unhappycamper]

7. Your latest LTTE is looking pretty good w8liftinglady.

I recced this and forgot to comment. D'oh.

[w8liftinglady]

8. Thanks,bud-now,hopefully,one of the lost souls here in Texas will think so...

[Obamanaut]

10. My screen shows no space after any comma in the LTTE. But my

screen also shows no space after the commas in the post to which I'm responding

"Thanks,bud-now,hopefully,one of the lost souls here in Texas will think so..."


Thanks, bud-now, hopefully, one of the lost souls here in Texas will think so...

[w8liftinglady]

11. Let's try this one

Just when you think you have seen it all, another example of "support of the troops" makes itself known. When profit is the motive behind deception, that makes it that much more heinous. This week, let's look at the anti-malarial drug Lariam.

Lariam was approved by the FDA in 1989 as an anti-malarial drug with production by Roche Pharmaceuticals, a Swiss pharmaceutical company. As a coincidence, Roche gained rights to Tamiflu production from Gilead Pharmaceuticals, chaired by one Donald Rumsfeld(remember this).

As early as 1995, researchers began warning physicians about prescription of Lariam, instructing them to avoid patients with known psychiatric disorders and epilepsy, as there were serious side effects in this subset of patients.

Lariam was widely prescribed to troops going to Iraq and Afghanistan. Reports began surfacing regarding increases in suicides and homicides in troops with no previously diagnosed psychiatric disorders. From 2003 through 2005, Fort Bragg reported multiple cases of suicides, murders and domestic violence-many of which were finally attributed to Lariam. As troops were redeployed, these instances increased. In 2003, Senator Dianne Feinstein asked Secretary of Defense Rumsfeld to review the administration of Lariam due to increasing neuropsychiatric side effects seen in the troops.

The DoD halted the administration of Lariam to troops stationed in Iraq,as the CDC recommendation for this region was mosquito repellant...no drugs indicated. In Afghanistan,Lariam continued to be administered until 2009-even though medications that had less complications-and were less expensive-had been available the whole time.

As time goes by, the full effects of Lariam remain to be seen. The incidence of suicide is increasing at a rapid rate, as well as aggressive behaviors, homicidal attempts and other neuropsychiatric complications.

Is Lariam yet another cause of the trauma seen by those who served? Don't let it become another Agent Orange or Depleted Uranium-only to be swept under the rug by a careless nation. Insist that our Senators and Representatives act in their constituents' best interests and sponsor further research by independent medical facilities.

If you have a family member who served in Iraq and Afghanistan after 2001,as well as a family member who may have traveled out of the country who experienced these symptoms,I suggest you educate yourself by visiting http://www.lariaminfo.org / .

Our troops can't wait forever for a grateful nation to refresh their collective memories

[Obamanaut]

12. Lovely. Nice LTTE. nt

[w8liftinglady]

13. hehe...do I pass?-kidding-it's been sent.thanks for the help.