|
Let me start with revisiting why I thought to do this project, and hence this test run. I am 50 years old, about to lose my house, my biz has been stagnant for about 3 years with little starts and spurts but nothing holding. I can't seem to find a job that will pay my bills; I'm told in the few interviews I've been in that they are receiving 100-150 resumes for the one job that was posted, of which about 80 are qualified, of the 80 about 50 are well over-qualified. So no hope there, and I've never had any luck to speak of. AND I FEEL ENTIRELY AND COMPLETELY INVISIBLE. I've never been in financial trouble, and up till about 6 months ago, I still believed I something would break my way and I'd squeak by once again. Now it's pretty clear I won't, but as much as there is news about the unfairness of what's going on for me and many like me, I just don't see a personal face to any of it. I want to go out and put a personal face on it, lots and lots of personal faces.
It has been amazing and discouraging, the casualness that the folks I've met have discussed their friends and neighbors being foreclosed on, losing their life savings, losing their livelihoods, and generally falling into economic despair.
"Oh well, another one bites the dust," seems to be the pervading perspective. I know part of it is embedded in the helplessness of the situation as a whole, but I don't understand this willingness of so many to accept that feeling of helpless observer of someone else's collapse. I suppose it may come from the nature of the episodic homeless. If I'm an example at all, I know that I am being very stoic when I discuss my situation with neighbors, even my kids (I have no other viable family). Perhaps that aids in the illusion that "oh, well" is a proper response considering that it doesn't seem as though I'm all that torn up about it. I am, I just hate being there in front of people, y'know.
Since I have this cool equipment all paid for, I thought I'd head out and help put a personal face on it, in a way that would allow for stoicism of the episodic homeless while screaming as loud as possible, "THIS IS REAL, THIS IS PERSONAL FOR ALL OF US, AND THIS NEEDS TO BE RESOLVED! WE NEED JOBS! WE NEED ROOFS OVER OUR HEADS! AND WE NEED OUR PAST EFFORTS AND DEDICATIONS TO THE ECONOMY RECOGNIZED! AND WE NEED FUTURES THAT OFFER THE HOPE OF RECOVERY."
HALF FULL
The trailer has finally got the electricity it will need to process videos. I have lived in the trailer exclusively for over two weeks through hot and very cool, rain and scorching sun, and have proven myself durable enough to manage the trailer and the inconveniences that come with trailer living. The trailer has proven itself safe to trail behind a car not intended to pull such a trailer. Any serious issues are addressed and life will be small though my world will get much larger. The good half, or perhaps the resolved half is a better way of the mechanics of this project.
HALF EMPTY
Now for the unresolved half. Starting last weekend I went in search of the episodic homeless like myself in the Los Angeles area. I put out a request here for anyone in LA to PM me and help me locate areas or issues of interest, but that post sank right quick and I got no responses. So I was on my own. I spoke with some city officials and some directly involved with homeless programs. What I learned is that my feeling invisible is fully justified. It turns out that the episodic homelesss, those that are homeless as a result of the economy rather than the chronic homeless who are homeless due to addictions, mental illnesses, etc., are virtually invisible. Most are apparently being absorbed by family and friends, and the rest are keeping their heads down.
Admittedly I haven't spoken to more than a half dozen people, but they seem to be somewhat in the know. What they've told me indicates that I'm going to have to do two things. First, I'm going to have to do some better research both online and on the phone to have a better idea where to focus, and how to connect with the episodic homeless and their issues and events should there be any. In this same arena, I'm really going to need help from those on DU that see this as a valid and valuable project. It will be most difficult when I hit the road for real, instead of this test run, to drive and process videos and research everywhere in order to determine where to head and what to record when I get there.
During this test run, those that were interested simply indicated to contact them when I was nearby. Well, I tried to do just that, but alas, timing was bad, or they didn't really have anything specific to point to, or because I was so poorly informed at the time as to the two types of homeless, the suggestions focused on chronic homelessness rather than episodic homelessness. In no way do I want to diminish the pllight of the chronically homeless, it isn't the point to this project though. After a half dozen like this, I quit calling even though I might have been nearby because clearly I didn't have my ducks in a row well enough to bother anyone.
Secondly, I think I need to broaden the scope a bit to include more related issues. I've not got a lot to add to this paragraph at this time, because I'm still pondering what events might be considered under that broader scope when it seems many of us prefer a certain personal invisibility even if we want our issues to be center front, and how my particular equipment and technically based videography and photography would be useful.
So I'm heading back home today. It'll be a few days to get there, then I'll have to deal with foreclosure issues probably, though I haven't gotten any official notice of impending foreclosure yet. They did find the note, but they also have to find the Assignments of Deed from the previous banks, and I've not seen those yet. Either way, I hope to have everything shut down and be back on the road for the project to begin in about 3 weeks.
I recognize that I'll need to have a somewhat pre-determined itinerary so that anyone who wants to guide my focus will be better able to do just that. Of course, there will need to be some flexibility in the schedule to be able to be certain places during certain specific events that might come to light after my itinerary is reviewed. At least a reasonable rough draft of a route and a time frame it going to be required of me.
For those individuals interested in being guides, more discussion either by PM, email, or phone needs to occur a week or more beforehand in order to assure I am there, whereever "there" is, in the right time frame. For example, I found out that if I could still be here on Monday or Tuesday, there'd be something to shoot. Unfortunately I can't because I have to get back for an appointment I have early next week. Had I known, I might have been able to adjust, but the fellow here and I didn't have any real conversations before I was essentially on his doorstep.
Well, I've got to finish packing the trailer up and get on the road. Please keep this one kicked a bit so those that are interested have a chance to see it. And those that are interested might want to subscribe to my journal here, where I'll post or to the GracelessGranny blog at Wordpress, as I try really hard not to request kicks or recs.
I'm terribly sorry I still have no video to show. Clearly this part of the test run was a failure, but with the nuts and bolts aspect of living on the road taking and processing videos is resolved, and clear knowledge as to why this last half failed, I'm pretty sure the actual project will be worth experiencing and presenting.
|
Printer-friendly format
Email this thread to a friend
Bookmark this thread
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
