Disappointing Turnout, Fox News Channel Says

[pokerfan]

:rofl:

The Fox News Channel reported today that the turnout for Jon Stewart’s “Rally to Restore Sanity” was underwhelming at best, with Fox sources estimating the total turnout at seven people.

“Our total count includes Stewart, Colbert, and what appear to be a few of their friends and relatives,” said Fox anchor Shepard Smith. “This has to be a smaller crowd than they were expecting.”

<...>

Even in the face of such evidence, Fox stood by its story, with Fox host Glenn Beck pointing out that the seven people in attendance were “largely elitists.”

“I was struck by how many correctly spelled signs there were,” Mr. Beck said. “That’s not my America.”

http://www.borowitzreport.com

:rofl:

[lpbk2713]

1. The Faux Comedy Channel.

These baggy pants news readers are a laugh riot.


:rofl:

[Ian David]

2. At Least 250,000 Attend Jon Stewart’s Rally to Restore Sanity

At Least 250,000 Attend Jon Stewart’s Rally to Restore Sanity
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x4594392

[pokerfan]

3. but how many correctly spelled signs?

damned elitist spellers...

[lunatica]

4. Live footage source...

"...an expert identified the supposedly “live footage” of today’s rally as file footage from a Sunday in 1997 when the Mall was completely shut down for reseeding."

[rhett o rick]

5. Bet they didnt even know how to spell "moran". nm

[BlancheSplanchnik]

6. Haaa, this had me going, wouldn't put it past Fux to tell their loyal morans the count was 7!

I didn't figure it out for sure until, "I was struck by how many correctly spelled signs there were,” Mr. Beck said. “That’s not my America.”

[pokerfan]

7. always the mark of good satire (nt)

[BlancheSplanchnik]

10. absolutely true!

Here's a great one:

http://objectiveministries.org/kidz/
http://objectiveministries.org/mallmission/

it's a whole website, check any links on the left-they're all hilarious.

[pokerfan]

11. one of my favorite sites

If you find an Atheist in your neighborhood, TELL A PARENT OR PASTOR RIGHT AWAY!

Atheists are often very grumpy and bitter and will lash out at children or they may even try to trick you into neglecting God's Word.

:rofl:

[BlancheSplanchnik]

14. OMG! You already know about Objective Ministries?

Far out!!! :rofl: !!!!!!!!!

That is some impressive satire there!

[pokerfan]

15. You might enjoy this cartoon

http://purplekoolaid.typepad.com/photos/cartoons/career1.html

Click next to see all seven parts.

[BlancheSplanchnik]

19. Very good! Thanks!

boy-o-boy, that cartoonist sure got Gawd's number, eh? Not a very likable guy.

I'm still pissed about the dinosaurs!

[watercolors]

8. Best sign I saw ," think outside the FOX "

would be a great bumber sticker!

[pokerfan]

9. it already is...

http://www.cafepress.com/irregulargoods.10849357


http://www.cafepress.com/+bumper_sticker_think_outside_the_fox,25891586

[donheld]

12. I'm sure from Fox was very disappointed.

[Hawkeye-X]

13. Let's see. 210,000 vs Beck's 87,000

Uh yeah. "Disappointing". As if you were expecting 5 jillion people to show up in all of Washington DC.

And guess what? That's just in DC alone - satellite rallies wasn't counted.

Hawkeye-X

[HipChick]

16. It was a terrible turn-out by all accounts..

http://www.flickr.com/photos/74104660@N00/5129901590/sizes/z/in/photostream/

[felix_numinous]

17. Nice try

sat up all night thinking of that one, huh?

Am I the only one that double checks this stuff to see if it is satire? You really cannot tell the difference these days with these people.

[pokerfan]

20. ???

:wtf:

[felix_numinous]

23. haha they got me

yeah I am new to them :blush:

[pokerfan]

24. no problemo

happens to us all.

:hi:

[Chimichurri]

18. up is down, black is white - they are so disgusting

[onenote]

21. For those who are new to this or with short memories

The borowitz report -- the source for the OP -- is a humor site.

[pokerfan]

22. I honestly though that would be apparent

as soon as one saw the number seven.