Nothing says springtime like a penis festival...

[mcctatas]

(the thread in which I try to atone for the whole edible severed penis thing)

KOMAKI, Japan — It's springtime in Japan and that means one thing.
Actually, two things. Penis festivals and vagina festivals.
It may sound like a sophomoric gag. But these are folk rites going back at least 1,500 years, into Japan's agricultural past. They're held to ensure a good harvest and promote baby-making.
Maybe they should hold more such festivals. Japan has one of the world's lowest birthrates (1.37 children per woman), which experts blame on stagnant incomes and changing gender relations.
The center-left government that came to power last year hopes to make child-rearing more affordable with a $280 monthly stipend per kid.

http://www.globalpost.com/dispatch/japan/100315/japan-penis-japanese-vaginas

[saltpoint]

1. But darn it, what on earth can be done to motivate people to

have sex?

Someone think of something -- fast!

[asdjrocky]

8. There was that girl in Memphis.

Candy? Or was it Darleen?

[saltpoint]

16. LOL.

LOL.

:hi:

[asdjrocky]

18. Indeed.

:hi:

[Sheepshank]

26. She was from Dallas

and her name was Debbie

[saltpoint]

35. One fights the urge to make a grassy knoll joke here but the

situation calls for restraint...

[asdjrocky]

38. No, you're thinking of Trixie from that truck stop.

It was Vegas.

[saltpoint]

41. You're probably right. Anything west of Jefferson City and the whole

maps just blurs out.

[TTUBatfan2008]

52. We should...

export Tiger Woods to Japan. :P

[rug]

2. I'm just here to hitch a ride to wherever thery move this.

[Jamastiene]

3. K&R IBTL

Any thread that contains penises and vaginas is usually a winner in my book.

I hearty K&R from me. :woohoo:

I shall go celebrate vagina now.

[jonnyblitz]

5. especially when posted in GD:P!!

:o

[Jamastiene]

7. Wow, the craftsmanship is superb in the photos.

I'm up to the sacred vagina now. I love it!

[jonnyblitz]

4. LMFAO!! good choice of forum to post this in!!

:rofl:

[mcctatas]

6. OMG!

I thought I was in the Lounge! OOPS! :rofl:

[jonnyblitz]

12. now you'll have all the GD:Pers who don't frequent the lounge

wondering about "the severed penis thing". :o

[mcctatas]

20. I think this thread would have been mediocre were in not for the fact that

I am a dumbass :P

[jonnyblitz]

24. LOL, don't be too hard on yourself. this forum could use some

lightening up! that thread title alone was priceless! :rofl:

and besides, this thread could never make greatest page if it were in the lounge!

[rug]

14. It's not too late to type Kucinich before penis.

[inna]

33. .

:spray:

:toast:

[QC]

27. Quick, post something about Obama's penis!

Then the thread will not be off topic.

(It still might get locked as a sex thread, though.)

[Warren DeMontague]

9. HEY HEY! HO HO! THIS PENIS PARTY'S GOT TO GO!

[rug]

10. One more for the Greatest Page.

Hurry before it's Loungefied.

[asdjrocky]

13. I am number 5.

[rug]

15. '

:woohoo:

[asdjrocky]

19. Are you kidding?

This just absolutely made my Tuesday night. I have a thing I have to write every week, and this came up just in the nick of time.

It's a reason to love DU.

[asdjrocky]

11. I say DU is all about community organizing.

In that spirit I plan to start my doing my civic duty tomorrow to organize such a festival for my town!

Who's with me?

[Jamastiene]

17. You have my full undivided support.

I want to be a penis carver. I want to carve a six and a half foot penis like in the picture gallery. :woohoo:

[asdjrocky]

21. It's important to have a hobby.

Even better if you can make it your calling...:)!

[Jamastiene]

23. I wonder if an 8 footer would be within the rules.

Why stop at 6 and a half when you can have 8. :woohoo:

I simply must learn to carve the vaginas too. I shall become a master vagina carver and make one of a kind knick knacks. I love the ashtrays too.

[asdjrocky]

34. Like my Mama always said, to each his own.

And like I always said, you can't go forcing something if it's just not right.

Penis, er, Party on.

[waiting for hope]

22. Only 6 and 1/2 feet?

Why set your expectations so low? Why do you hate Amerika? :spank: ... I say go for 10 feet .. :smoke:

:rofl:

[Jamastiene]

25. Oh, wow, that would be great.

I like the way you think. :thumbsup:

[waiting for hope]

28. Remember this ... ?

Cher in the Witches of Eastwick and the Big Boob figurines? I'd say that scale would be perfect! :)

[Jamastiene]

32. Bingo.

Now, we are talking. :woohoo:

[name not needed]

29. 'penis carver.' now there's 2 words that don't belong in the same sentence.

[progressoid]

30. Isn't that a mohel?

[saltpoint]

31. I've had the ham carver at Boston Market...

[asdjrocky]

36. You'll be relieved to know, one has nothing to do with the other.

However, I'd not recommend the rump roast and Ralph's.

[saltpoint]

39. Well good. Come to think of it, I really AM relieved the one has

nothing to do with the other.

And on the strength of your good advice, I'm gonna pass on the rump roast.

[Froward69]

37. I'm Gonna say it...

This thread is useless without Photos... ;)

[mcctatas]

40. psssssttttt....

plenty of photos at link ;)

[robinblue]

43. penis candies and sacred vaginas at the link. Enjoy.

[TankLV]

42. I sometimes feel like that second pic...

But not as much as I get older

sigh...

[Blue Owl]

44. Spring Is Here, Time For Fucking

A classic Onion headline from years ago...

[HopeHoops]

45. You have to feel sorry for the 37/100ths of a child.

They must feel so inferior to the older 100% child.

[Blue_Tires]

46. i discovered the problem -- they are spending WAY too much time

on massive woodcarvings and rituals instead of humping

[SoxFan]

47. ...

[Fire Walk With Me]

48. Think! Which image to use as my new avatar?

[dem mba]

49. heyhey hoho this penis party's got to go! - nt

[mikekohr]

50. Have you ever seen a picture of the people at a Republican National Convention?

[dixiegrrrrl]

51. Gotta love some of the captions..

" the giant phallus is spun around".

"2 men inspect the sacred vagina"...
And do be sure to see # 13

and the aptly named "shaped ashtrays"..

[old mark]

53. "Do you want sticky rice balls with that?" nt

[TexasObserver]

54. Wun Hung Lo was last year's wiener ... er, winner.

[Sheepshank]

55. bwaah haa haa n/t