Battle of the embarrassing GOP spouses

[w8liftinglady]

http://www.salon.com/news/politics/war_room/2011/07/06/callista_marcus

Did you read that wonderful Washington Post profile of Rep. Michele Bachmann's husband Marcus? Breaking: Guy really hates gay people, just like his wife, who is currently catching up to Mitt Romney in the polls. In order to justify writing about him, there is some talk about how he calls himself the candidate's "strategist," but this is really just your typical presidential election "look at this crazy spouse" article. Welcome to the club, Marcus Bachmann! Will you unseat Callista Gingrich as this cycle's weirdest loved one not running for anything?

The most wonderful part of every election season is when political reporters and commentators get bored with examining candidates' positions, records and biographies, and begin focusing on how weird or weirdly not-weird their families are. There is generally a mass display of truly astounding sexism that is occasionally followed by news about the candidate's offspring getting drunk or smoking weed or being pregnant. It's fun for everyone, besides the people insane enough to want to run for national office.

Sometimes a candidate emerges unscathed: Mitt Romney's perfect square-jawed Mormon super-family is weird, sure, but there aren't really specific details of weirdness to latch onto, besides the fact that the candidate thought the story of the time he tortured his dog was funny and not horrifying. Tim Pawlenty says weird things about his wife, but she seems perfectly normal (for an evangelical right-winger, obviously). Who even knows if Herman Cain has a mate. (His is married to his work, by which I mean he is married to pizza.)

But Callista Gingrich is sort of a classic Republican candidate spouse type. She isn't his first wife, like most of the rest of them. She was once his mistress, like Judith Giuliani. She's very, very blond, with a bit of crazy-eye, like Cindy McCain. And like all classic campaign wives, many of her husband's obvious, glaring failings can be blamed on her. Gingrich's laziness and unwillingness to actually campaign? Callista's fault! His hilarious Tiffany and Co. spending habit? He had to buy his wife baubles! She's got some sort of magical hold on him that makes him go on cruises instead of going to New Hampshire!

[Kolesar]

1. "crazy eye"