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When my son was a little boy he had a little stuffed animal, Gizmo from the gremlins. He loved that movie as a tot, and he slept with gizmo and took him everywhere. It was his security blanket.
As the years wore he lost and eye and became well worn.
Many years later after his mom and I split, she remarried and had a daughter. It was to be her doom - six years after her daughter born, on July 4th, 2005, she passed away, 42 years old.
When my son left for the military he gave his beloved Gizmo, what was left of him, to his step-sister. Something to remember him by and to hold on to on dark nights.
At some point when I was living in CA I found a new one and bought it. After the move it was lost, my life went all to hell, etc. But while he was in Iraq it was found while looking through things, and sits in the basement. Waiting for September.
I emailed my son a few months ago while telling him it was here, but I kept it out of sight - because every time I looked at it I remembered him holding it in his bed. He was so excited. Big old soldier he was a world away he still wants to hold his Gizmo again, even though it is a newer one and not his original one.
Tonight I took it out and hugged it for him. He is home. And on September 3 or 4 he will be back here in Ohio and I will get to hand it personally to him.
When he was 8 we were going home, a 50 mile drive, and he had forgot Gizmo at grandma's. We turned around and went and got it.
I don't know what he dreams he had while holding it, but I know it was a little something that got him through a lot.
When I talked to him he told me he lost several friends there, saw some IED's go off while on convoys. Maybe ole Gizmo will help out while he transitions back to civilian life.
Me and him, sitting around a fire together, a few beers, tales of his trip, and Gizmo. This little Gizmo is got a lot of catching up to do.
Years ago up in the Tehachapi Mountains I wrote this poem, it was, in a way, based upon ole Gizmo:
The Little Teddy Bear
1916
Winds of war blow across the land
Shells fall, whistling their death tune
Gunshots near the village
Tanks and men
A little boy huddles under his bed
Hiding
Clutching all he has left
A teddy bear
Ragged, but sewn well
Buttons for eyes
Small bow upon it’s neck
Soft
His parents gone
The Germans
A wounded GI had found him
And given to him the little Bear
Days come and go
Chilly nights
Warmed only by the touch
Of his cuddly bear
War is over
An orphanage
He clings to his only possession
Now wet with many tears
1944
War again
He marches into battle
Gun at side
Bear, in his backpack
Across fields he runs
Avoiding land mines
Gun fire
Shells
At night
When he sits alone
Out comes his little bear
And away goes the fear
Winter sets in
He is still alive
They come to a small village
In France
Christmas night
War rages on for the town
They break through
And liberate it
House to house
Searching for the enemy
Until he hears her
A little child, crying
He kneels
And looks under the bed
She recoils in fear
Whimpering
Gun set aside
He opens his pack
One last time his hands touch
His little bear
He smiles at it
Then at her
She sees the bear
His smile
His hand slides under the bed
She takes it
Emerging from her hiding place
Clothes tattered and torn
She looks up at him
Tears streaking her little face
Looks at his little bear
And opens her arms
It passes then
From man to child
For once in so many years
He lets it go
She hugs it
Holds it tight
And weeps
Upon her little bear
She carried that bear
For all her years
As she lay upon her deathbed
He was there
No fear
As she passed on that Fall
Her arms tightly holding
Her little bear
It baffled them
As they read her will
Everything went to her family
Except that teddy bear
On Christmas eve
A little boy
In his hospital bed
Waited for Santa
He awoke
Still dark outside
Somewhere over the speakers
Silent night played softly
A package was there
Next to his bed
Tied in a ribbon
Bright, cheery and red
He tore it open
Joy on his face
And laying within
A little teddy bear
He hugged it
And kissed it
Named it Ted
Then brushed off all the leaves it had
He thought it odd
Leaves covered it
And it seemed cold and a little wet
He snuggled it hard, and with it he slept
The attorney sat that night
Remembering the will
He found it strange
What she had said
Take this bear, and give it a box
Put it upon my grave
On my estate plot
And let it be
For it not stay
When it is needed
May it find it’s way
To a child’s arms
Slightly snoring, the little boy slept
A leaf caught in his hair
The bear woke up, and looked about
Blew the leaf off
And hugged his little boy
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