Breaking: They Are Going to Go PRAY!!!!!!!!

[DemocracyInaction]

Honest to Christ!!! Just heard it on Fox (barf) news. The lunatics have gone to the House chapel to pray. Boehner vote delayed because doesn't have the votes and the fuckheads are going to go pray about it. Jesushchrist, these people are Elmer Gantry on steriods.

[FreakinDJ]

1. you r fuckin kidding me

[NightWatcher]

2. Breaking: God let's it roll to his voicemail

[HipChick]

7. This always makes me cry..God Is Trying To Tell You Something

Speak to me Lord...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7ZT5sajkys

[MadMaddie]

87. One of my favorites...

[Mimosa]

107. Me, too. TEARS.

Isn't it beautiful?

[ashling]

21. Murdoch has been deleting God's voicemail

:shrug:

[wryter2000]

76. You, too

:rofl: :applause: :yourock:

[gateley]

47. Bwah! nt

[SusanaMontana41]

68. hahahahahahahaha

:rofl:

[wryter2000]

75. You owe me a keyboard.

I wish we still had the DUzys.

:rofl: :applause: :yourock:

[snooper2]

121. Jesabus didn't pay her bill so we have locked VM account

She really needs to get better with money management :)

[lonestarnot]

124. ROFLMAO!

[HipChick]

3. Holey Moley...

[Fozzledick]

4. Didn't they just arrest the clergy for praying in the Capitol?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=439x1599211

[DemocracyInaction]

14. Should have stuck around for the big pray-out

Can you just see Bachmann and this lunatic crowd! Don't tell me these clowns aren't dangerous. Talk about playing to the lunatics of the Christian Right. What's next - perhaps they will nail someone to the cross and parade them around tonight (Ummmm-- John---stay away from nails).

[colorado_ufo]

56. Not to worry.

They don't believe a word of it. It's all theatrics to play to their base.

:banghead:

[ZombieHorde]

139. How do you know? nt

[SoutherDem]

34. But they weren't on god's side...

remember, god talks to the tea party telling them every move. Isn't it clear, god is for the rich and hates the poor. That is probably the reason his son was born in a giant mansion, wore glamorous clothing and had twelve servant to meet his every whim. Then when he dies he was buried in a marble tomb.

[mfcorey1]

5. You can't write this script. It is so far over the edge. WTF are we dealing with?

Somebody tell them to keep it in the new testament. LOL

[MadMaddie]

92. What we are dealling with are Fanatics twho are out to destroy this

country and our way of life....

[CakeGrrl]

6. Srsly? If so, hilarious.

[gratuitous]

8. Did they say who they're praying to?

Mooby!

[Rex]

9. They are a group that can barely work or function together.

The most dysfunctional political group in American history. WE...ARE...FUCKED. Hey, what happens if they pray and Satan shows up and pretends to be God? Will the even notice? I doubt it.

[The Magistrate]

53. Satan Did That Long Ago, Sir, And No, They Did Not Notice....

They have been taking orders direct from him ever since....

[Rex]

102. Never seen Cthulhu look so happy!

Is that Rush Limburger and Carrotman in the front...we need floaters!

Well played! :hi:

[Urban Prairie]

113. Where's Condi?

She must've had to take a dump when this image was created?

[Generic Other]

132. Oh Good Lord! This is such an improvement on the original poster!

Much more accurate portrayal of our present situation!

[HockeyMom]

10. They prayed AGAINST Gay Marriage in NY

How did that work out for them? Maybe god doesn't like YOU????? "As you do to the least of mine, you do to me"; as in poor, elderly, sick, etc. Haven't been in a church for DECADES, but it's amazing what you remember from 12 years of catholic school.

[rurallib]

11. dear jeebus - help us fuck over the poor, the lame, the sick, the old

in your name, baby jeebus. Amen.
And could you throw in some tax cuts for our rich friends?

[October]

12. Amen!

[Contrary1]

25. So be it...

In the name of the Kochs, Murdoch and son, and the Holy Halliburtons.

[marions ghost]

128. !!!!!

:spray:

[Solomon]

83. That's a keeper.

:rofl:

[rurallib]

13. makes me wonder how the Onion can ever stay in business

with these guys around.

[ewagner]

24. roflmao

The Onion should sue! They're stealing their act

[malaise]

30. Gawd is going to tell them to give Obama a clean bill

or their corporate owners won't give them a penny

[valerief]

43. I wonder the same thing, too. nt

[krispos42]

112. I think the Onion had a rough time under Bush

They kept doing crazier shit than the Onion writers could dream up.

3 days before Bush the Lesser was sworn in:

[Missy Vixen]

15. I'm going to pray, too

I'll pray that the people of the United States are not held hostage by a bunch of idiots that have NO idea what Christianity is really about.

:eyes:

[Snotcicles]

16. Watching Boehner follow Pelosi is like watching Neil Sedaka follow Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. nt

[DemocracyInaction]

51. Snot

...beautiful!!!

[klook]

17. Praying for Jesus to come in on his Dinosaur

and smite their enemies.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/bar-art/414998399/

[notadmblnd]

18. I hope they burst into flames when their god hears their prayer

[nadinbrzezinski]

19. I know US history quite well

I think a few of the founders they idolize (Jefferson comes to mind) are doing summersaults right about now.

[FormerDittoHead]

20. Wow. If my Congressman was one of these jokers, he'd know my name by now...

Sometimes I honestly wish I lived in one of these districts just so they'd have to take my call.

[piratefish08]

22. Dear God

Please send Jesus to remind these fuckmuscles that you told them to give ALL their shit to the poor.

ALL. YOUR. SHIT. Not some of it. Not most of it. ALL OF IT.

Yes Jesus, I know you could not have been clearer the first time. But these people are stupid. REAL fucking stupid.

The ones that aren't ACTUALLY stupid, are acting stupid.

Please send a lightening bolt of brain activity to these asshats.

RAmen

[Name removed]

23. Deleted message

Sub-thread removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[SidDithers]

26. Try one more edit. Third time's a charm...nt

Sid

[DemocracyInaction]

31. Just did

God, did I screw it up again---------Hey, God, change the damn thing instead of listening to those lunatics under the big white dome!!!...Shall try again.

[SidDithers]

80. Sorry, I wouldn't normally post about a spelling thing...

But the first correction was kinda funny :hi:

Sid

[Union Scribe]

27. Strike two. There. Their. Almost, dude.

[Change Happens]

28. They are?

[Love Bug]

29. Bunch of sanctimonious yahoos!

[deminks]

32. LOL, prolly a 'come to Jesus meeting' where they pray somebody doesn't break their knees

[valerief]

33. The Family. nt

[Mnemosyne]

35. Correct. It makes it even more disturbing realizng that, doesn't it? n/t

[Wait Wut]

36. This is when a random lightening strike would be awesome.

Not to really hurt any of them. I'm really not that evil. Just enough to give them a HOLY FUCK moment.

[ZombieHorde]

142. I really doubt they would interpret the lightning bolt the way you would want them to. nt

[sendero]

37. Now we know..

.. we're fucked. God gave up on this greed-infested nation decades ago.

[Creideiki]

84. Precisely three decades.

Possibly 4.

[Urban Prairie]

38. Praying to their creator to help them commit fiscal genocide upon our nation..

Seems like a good idea, since they won't even need to build an "Ark" if He hears and answers their prayers.

:shrug:

[MadMaddie]

94. Well if they did have to build an Ark they would bust the Ark

Union so they could pay them pennies...

[barbtries]

39. lol

it's fucking pathetic. and our fate lies in their hands. they must love that.

[stopbush]

40. Translation: they're going to talk to themselves, imagining that the voice they hear

in their heads is from some god (Zeus?), and afterward, they'll have an excuse to go ahead and do what they planned to do before they prayed.

Now, THIS kind of incident really points out the childishness and abject stupidity than girds religious thought.

[hifiguy]

140. + one googolplex. nt

[Raine]

41. They better be careful God could hit them with a bolt of lightening

and knock them flat on their asses. :evilfrown: :thumbsup:

[pintobean]

42. Yeah, some people do that

:shrug:

[gateley]

44. I can just imagine what their greedy, bigoted, judgmental God

will tell them. :eyes:

[snagglepuss]

45. You fail to mention to whom they are praying.

I suspect it's Satan.

[hifiguy]

126. I don't think so

The "god" of the old testament was a bloodthirsty, megalomaniacal and genocidal psychopath. Sounds about right for the baggers.

[Arugula Latte]

141. Yahweh -- The god for Yahoos.

[dgibby]

46. Who went?

Boehner or the teabaggers?

[DemocracyInaction]

54. Teabaggers

I assume Mr. Boehner went to pray to his God Jack Daniels!!! Seriously, I think this could be the end of Boehner.

[MadMaddie]

97. I think it's the end of Boehner and the Teabaggers

[marions ghost]

134. bwahaha

:spray:

[woodsprite]

48. Wait a minute! They had a whole bunch of ministers there

earlier today that wanted to pray, but they were ousted. NOW they want to pray? Apparently those ministers' prayers were not what they wanted to hear.

[Seedersandleechers]

61. You are right

those ministers where sticking up for the poor and middle class.

[aquart]

49. Is Cantor in church with them?

[alcibiades_mystery]

57. ROFL

:thumbsup:

[colorado_ufo]

65. OK - you owe me a keyboard!

:rofl:

[mfcorey1]

50. WWJD?

[nc4bo]

52. Turn that water into wine, bust out the chalice and party like it's 2012? nt

[GreatCaesarsGhost]

55. Boehner: Dear Jesus, Help me get their ass in line. Amen

[DemocracyInaction]

58. Seriously could be the end for them

This would not be what Boehner wants to see because it shows the country they are lunatics. Even religious people who are not Christian right would be shocked that this is how they handle governing and the financial fate of the country??? Boehner and Cantor now have a "how do we hide these insane idiots" from the public problem. Obama must be laughing while puffing a butt in the WH basement.

[dissidentboomer]

59. Just too easy.... I can't say anything. I'm too busy crying and

laughing. This is so pathetic. We are the joke of the developed world.... or what's left of it.

[TNLib]

60. Well that's better than getting jacked up with violent action movies

like they did yesterday.

[dissidentboomer]

62. Stop!

:rofl:

[B Calm]

63. I heard the movie was Armageddon. . .

[DemocracyInaction]

67. Who was the football player today?

They said it was either an old NFL player or old Notre Dame player or something that was their pep rally today. My God, what is this---gettin' the kiddies jacked up for a middle school football game. I mean, this is governing?????????

[TNLib]

74. The Town a Ben Aflec movie

:crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy::crazy:

[WinkyDink]

64. God replied, "Come back after you've read The Beatitudes."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beatitudes

[arbusto_baboso]

66. To their True God: Mammon.

[Initech]

69. Their true god is the almighty dollar.

[marions ghost]

135. Definition of

Mammon = The Almighty Dollar

"Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal:
But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other;
or else he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You can not serve both God and Mammon.
O8) :evilfrown:

—Matthew 6:19-21,24

[sofa king]

70. (Psst. I don't listen to them. They're evil.)

Edit: Your car keys are on the windowsill by the door, where you tossed them while you were trying not to drop the groceries. Have a nice evening!

[OmahaBlueDog]

71. Get your ass in church!

:evilgrin:

[DearAbby]

72. Boogity boogity boogity, Amen. n/t

[Deb]

73. For mercy and forgiveness

or bread and butter?

[Joe the Revelator]

77. Oh fuck me......pandering assholes.

[AlinPA]

78. Is there a separate chapel for Republicans?

[Angry Dragon]

79. Transcript from chapel:

Don't even think about getting on your knees unless it is to ask me not to smite you. What are you people doing in here when you should be doing your jobs? You people make me sick. I give you a good book to read and all you do is read that Ayn Rand bimbo's book and you think it has the answers.

I sent my son to help you out and all you do is pay lip service to him. You suck at the teat of the almighty dollar when I am the Almighty. He told you to help the poor, the ones that had trouble traveling through life and all you do is knock them down so you can drink from the fountain of greed. You are nothing more than the scum of the earth, some of the most vile beings I have ever seen.

I made some mistakes when I first started out and I crushed some people because they pissed me off. Do you really want to piss me off? You know my son is a lot more liberal than I am.

If you are going to get on your knees it should be to the people that you are trying to screw over and ask them for forgiveness.

Now get out of here and use the brains, heart, and soul that you have before I smite you all and send you to the bowels of hell where my brother Satan will be more than glad to flay the flesh off your bodies, burn you in the fires of hell, and make you suffer for your eternal ignorance.

Now get out of my sight before I say, 'To hell with you all'

[Control-Z]

123. That was excellent.

Did you write it?

[Angry Dragon]

137. yes I did

[Incitatus]

81. PLEASE GOD, there must be a way to fix this mess without raising my taxes a few percent. nt

[RagAss]

82. We live in the Darkest of times !

[Urban Prairie]

85. Jesus/God sure ain't gonna be fooled by their faux prayers

b/c the only things that Rethugs really worship are 1) Money 2) Power and 3) Those who have it and wield it.

Maybe they should pray to the "Virgin" Mary instead, maybe she will take pity on their greedy evil sociopathic souls, and intercede on their behalf, but I truly doubt it.

[grantcart]

86. Never in my life have I ever wished for a 6.5 earthquake in DC as much as I do now.

[Hugabear]

106. How about a precision guided asteroid?

One big enough to take out the Teabagger caucus, but big enough to cause any real collateral damage.

[frogmarch]

88. Stupid asses!

WTF! :mad:

[sarcasmo]

89. Oh great sky being please help us solve this crisis we didn't have to create.

More religious stupidity.

[dissidentboomer]

90. They are making a brief, tragicomic appearance on the stage of history.

[AsahinaKimi]

91. By Crom!!

Crom, I have never prayed to you before. I have no tongue for it. No one, not even you, will remember if we were good men or bad. Why we fought, or why we died. All that matters is that two stood against many. That's what's important! Valor pleases you, Crom... so grant me one request. Grant me revenge! And if you do not listen, then to HELL with you!

What ever happened to all the cool prayers?

[Bluebear]

93. Hey ya ya ya hey ya ya ya!

[Whisp]

95. I think they are going to Prey.

[grahamhgreen]

98. +1

[newspeak]

100. Yep, it's "let us prey."

We've got the looney tunes running the farm, and it's kind of scary. You know, many think that Hitler was anti-christ, into occultism- but he really used religion, christianity, for his own ends. As he stated, "who said God is not on my side." And let's remember who he branded as the enemy; gays, jews, outspoken clergy, women, unionists, socialists-basically liberals. He outlawed abortion, outlawed gays. The weak, the sick, the mentally impaired of his own people-some killed and others left on their own.

Beck tries so hard to link liberals with Hitler, and yet, his rhetoric mirrors those beliefs. I just want to know if we have that many truly gullible or maybe masochistic people in this country to have allowed these sociopaths to get elected.

Oh, and I think they actually worship Moloch. Predates that liberal Jesus--just throw Moloch a sacrifice and he'll give you wealth and power. I think they're getting ready to sacrifice some of us.

[marions ghost]

136. Yep the Baggers go back well before Jesus

when Moloch required human sacrifices. They have come for blood.

"In modern English usage, "Moloch" can refer derivatively to any person or thing which demands or requires costly sacrifices." Wiki

Murdoch, son of Moloch?

[Whisp]

96. wonder what Jesus will say....

fuck y'all!

[LiberalEsto]

122. He would cast out the moneychangers

and the lobbyists

[mmonk]

99. These people have made religion into such a ridiculous caricature,

I can't take religion serious anymore except as a threat in politics.

[RainDog]

101. TOO FUCKING STUPID TO DO THEIR JOBS

throw these assholes into the Potomac River - the teabagger repukes do not know how to govern.

you don't get to throw tantrums to get your way, fuckers, then pray to the baby jesus.

and anyone who voted for any one of these folks - FUCK YOU.

[Pooka Fey]

116. + 1,000,000.00

[hifiguy]

117. Amen to that, if you will pardon the expression. nt

[Renew Deal]

103. Dear God, how do we get out of this one?

We made a promise we couldn't keep and now we're stuck dealing with it. What do we do now?

[Hugabear]

104. I've been praying for the Rapture to take the teabaggers away, but they're still here

Waste of time.

[Mimosa]

105. Jesus says : Let them go hungry. WAR IS WHAT AMERICA IS ABOUT. n/t

[avaistheone1]

109. Yes Jesus, let them go without heat, and health care too, For this we pray.

Amen ~ The Republican Prayer.





puke

[Kablooie]

108. Finally something productive! God will know what to do.

He/she/it will listen to their prayers and then stare off into space just like he/she/it has done since the beginning of time.

[astral]

110. If they just pray for God's Will, they will be okay ....

(puts on hood, hides face, runs out the door...)

[indurancevile]

111. disgusting bunch of frauds. right, they're going to praaaaaaay

[Warren DeMontague]

114. Of course they are.

I mean, is anyone surprised? It's not like they know how to actually govern..

[Warren DeMontague]

115. "Kent, This Is God"

"Stop Touching Yourself"

[jtown1123]

118. Yep. They are so insane...

[lunatica]

119. Afterwards they'll say that whatever happens will be God's fault

Er, I mean, God's will.

[mikeytherat]

120. So, if they can't deliver, this is going to be God's fault now?

:rofl:

mikey_the_rat

[WI_DEM]

125. Boner--god sent you a message 'your bill is shit'

[divvy]

127. Breaking: Gad hates the Republican Bastards

Their stupidity in this matter from, top to bottom, is actually unbelievable. Too bad it is true.

[Lorien]

129. Hypocrites. Not one of them is a Christian. Christ was about HELPING the poor and

CONDEMNING the wealthy!

[L. Coyote]

130. "Dear GOD, Please make the end time start before we run out of money. This makes my head hurt."

"God, I wish you had given us the intelligence to solve such complex problems, but since we are just a lot of ego-maniacal simpletons massaging our own egos by running for public office, could you just start the end times and get it over with soon? PLEASE GOD, lift me up to heaven now so I'll never have to think again. It makes my head hurt! PLEEEEASE!"

[n2doc]

131. And I'm sure GAWD will tell them "Go F**k the Poor!" n/t

[Contrary1]

133. Their prayers were answered!

Domino's delivered.

[Proles]

138. Well, praying is more likely to help than

waiting for these repub's to agree on a "good" deal.