Breaking: Fox News on Gov. Perry!

[H2O Man]

(Oct 13, 2011) Fox News: Attorneys for republican presidential candidate Michele Bachmann have filed a complaint with the Republican National Committee, charging that Texas Governor Rick Perry engaged in “unethical and possibly illegal medical abuse” before the most recent debate.

“We have solid evidence of abuse,” said Bachmann spokesman Arthur Burns, on the candidate's official website. ( http://www.michelebachmann.com/ ) This alleged evidence includes photographs of a man identified as Dr. Murray Conrad, seen delivering a supply of chlorpromazine to Rick Perry's dressing room an hour before the Dartmouth College debate. “Chlorpromazine, more commonly known as thorazine, is a medication primary associated with the treatment of severe mental illnesses,” said Attorney Burns. “It is also used, in smaller doses, to reduce anxiety and nervousness before major surgeries. The remarkably flat affect of Governor Perry on stage in Hanover suggests that he had either consumed a massive quantity of chlorpromazine, or been subjected to a lobotomy. We are demanding that the RNC investigate fully. We are also considering filing a joint complaint with several other republican candidates, who have expressed concern with Rick Perry's behavior.”

The Bachmann campaign refused to identify which other campaigns had been involved in the discussions about Governor Perry. Fox News sources have unconfirmed reports that former Ambassador Jon Huntsman told his advisors after the debate that he had experienced difficulty in concentrating, due to Perry's “incessant humming while other's were speaking.” Fox News sources have confirmed that Gov. Perry was heard sing “I'm a Believer,” a song by the 1960s acid rock group The Monkees, after the debate.

The Perry Campaign has refused to comment on this story at this point.

Http://FoxNews.com/Bachmanncampaignchargesabuse/lsd25.com

[fascisthunter]

1. so what's Bachman on?

...or did her delivery go to Perry instead of her.

[EOTE]

45. Mother's Little Helper.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tfGYSHy1jQs

[Taverner]

63. She's high on JEEEEZUS!!!!

Far more dangerous than any drug available

[fascisthunter]

67. her version of the man...

... those religious right wingers call the devil Jesus, and Jesus the devil.

[L0oniX]

70. No ...she really is like that all the time without drugs.

[AngryOldDem]

2. If this came from anybody else but Bachmann...

Right now I'm taking it with a huge grain of salt. Let me guess -- did he get a shot of Gardasil?

Her campaign is swirling the drain and she's desperate for attention -- ANY kind of attention.

[banned from Kos]

3. The Monkees were "acid rock" to Fox News? hiliarious..

Perry tripping to the Monkees.

[maxrandb]

51. Maybe he was thinking of this song

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ywTtXwfuu_Y

Monkees get a bad rap. This particular song was written by Peter Tork (yes, they did write some of their own songs).

I'm not a huge fan, but I get so tired of the "smug" sanctimonious who so derisively dismiss the Monkees. For their time, there were extremely popular, and I believe they still hold some pretty significant records.

- First music artist to win two Emmy Awards.
- Had seven albums on the Billboard top 200 chart at the same time (six were re-issues during 1986/87).
- The Monkees are one of the first artists achieving number-one hits in the United States and United Kingdom simultaneously.
- More of The Monkees spent 70 weeks on the Billboard charts, becoming the 12th biggest selling album of all time.<30>
- Four number-one albums in a one-year span.<31>
- Held the number one spot on the Billboard album chart for 31 consecutive weeks, 37 weeks total.<32>
- Held the record for the longest stay at number one for a debut record album

[dionysus]

54. the sad part is when they became an actual band, they got screwed.

[myrna minx]

4. LOL - "acid rock group The Monkees"

:D

[DainBramaged]

22. I sure didn't listen to the Monkees when I was tripping

what bullshit.....

[hootinholler]

29. Maybe you should have

It would have given them gravitas that otherwise they would never achieve.

[Segami]

24. HAHAHA..

Acid Rock?? The Monkees?? What is she smoking??

Must be those damn hippies again!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Hepburn]

5. Latte spew!

:wow:

:rofl:

:hi:

[Javaman]

6. Let's get ready to rumble!!! grudge match of teh stupids. nt

[randome]

7. Is Anonymous posting stories on FoxNews.com now?

[Bryan Buchan]

8. I don't see anything on that crazy woman's website regarding this, link?

n/t

[Bryan Buchan]

9. And your fox news link does not refer to anything, I think this is BUNK

n/t

[myrna minx]

11. (It's satire) n/t

[lumberjack_jeff]

12. it isn't a fox news link. It goes to lsd25.com n/t

[H2O Man]

13. Keep trying them ....

both work for me. It may be a case of high traffic.

[AngryOldDem]

15. Note the name of the doctor...

Murray Conrad.

What's the name of Michael Jackson's doc? Conrad Murray.

This is sounding more like The Onion than Fox.

[H2O Man]

17. I'm starting to

wonder if it is real, or just the type of thing I post every October for fun. Could be both, I suspect.

[AngryOldDem]

20. Oh well...it's good for a laugh!

:D

[H2O Man]

25. Before posting it,

I asked my son to read it over. He thought it was a giggle. I asked, "No one could possibly mistake this for real, could they?" He said, "No, it's way too obvious."

I blame him for any confusion.

[Pacifist Patriot]

39. LOL! I like your son.

This is something my 14 year old would have howled over.

[myrna minx]

32. .

[Gin]

60. I saw that too....

[hamsterjill]

73. I noticed that!

Suspicious...

[lumberjack_jeff]

10. Funny. n/t

[Pigheaded]

14. I can't find a link anywhere. PH

[workinclasszero]

16. Is this from the onion? nt

[H2O Man]

19. "Glass Onion"

If you play the song "Glass Onion" from The Beatles (aka The White Album) backwards, this report can clearly be heard.

[TeeYiYi]

18. Oh come on...

This has to be satire. Dr. Conrad Murray? ... Michael Jackson's doctor's name reversed? ... Don't think so.

TYY

[Little Star]

21. Dr. Murray Conrad? Michael Jackson Doctor named Conrad Murray..

That just struck me as kinda odd.

Bachmann is the one who really needs to be on some sort of treatment, she's batty.

[calimary]

35. Yeah I noticed that too. If you turn it upside down... well, the devil's in the details here too.

Why does this sound like it came from The Onion or Andy Borowitz or something? Or is it just that I find most republi-CONS such a freakin' joke most of the time that it's my default position to have a reaction like this?

[H2O Man]

36. I would guess

that the person who wrote the OP holds republicans in utter contempt. I'm sure it's not from the Onion or Andy. It sounds a lot more like a DUer known as "Water Man" to me. He does this every October.

[calimary]

50. Love it! Because I love the posts by this DUer named "H2O Man"!

Probably because I, too, tend to hold republi-CONS in utter contempt.

And I just LOVE the smell of republi-CONS self-immolating in the morning!

[bigtree]

23. wow

he doesn't sound well.

Thanks for this :hi:

[trumad]

26. Yo Water Man---

You've been punk'd.

He He

[H2O Man]

28. Doubt it.

It's my annual "October Surprise." Seemed a bit too obvious to me.

[stlsaxman]

27. WARNING: THE LINK OPENS MY MAIL CLIENT...

when i copy the URL into my web browser it says "page not found".

thinking it might be trojan hack?

[stlsaxman]

30. okay ha... more fool me, huh?

[Pacifist Patriot]

31. You see, it's times like these....

when satire and reality become hopelessly confused. And THAT says volumes about the GOP candidates for president.

[H2O Man]

33. I just showed

my son your response. "That's quality," he said.

Thank you.

[Pacifist Patriot]

37. Unfortunately....

a general decline in critical thinking skills and an appreciation for metaphor appears to be epidemic on both sides of the aisle. When someone on DU complains that there is technically no such thing as a card-carrying liberal I feel we've lost part of the battle. *sigh*

Cheers!

[On the Road]

34. OK, So Someone in the Bachmann Campaign

took a photo of a doctor visiting Perry's dressing room. But photographs "carrying Chlorpromazine" -- how do they know that? Was this like a cartoon where the doctor had an oversized syringe with a big label hanging off of it?

But stranger things have have affected campaigns. People still remember the accusations that Ed Muskie was using the South American hallucinogen ibogaine during the '72 campaign, even though it was pretty clearly a fabrication by Hunter Thompson.

[immoderate]

38. Sometime in the near future, the sensory telemetry will exist...

...to display the real-time blood chemistry constituents of presidential debate participants to their constituents on their podia.

--imm

[Emit]

40. Ha!

ahahahaha! :spray: Good one, H2OMan, good one!

[Jazzgirl]

41. H2O Man...if this wasn't from you I'd swear this was an article

from the Onion. :rofl:

[H2O Man]

43. Probably at least

two dozen people have told me that I should submit some of my stuff like this to the Onion.

I grew up poor, and one of the few forms of recreation that my siblings & I could afford was making prank phone calls, and other forms of monkey warfare. Having been the youngest, I did not get in as much trouble those times the NYS Police's Bureau of Criminal Investigation visited our house, as a result of some of those pranks. Every October, I've posted some nonsense like this OP on DU:GD. I try to make them so obvious that no one could mistake them as anything but an attempt, however feeble, at humor.

[Mnemosyne]

47. Is your refrigerator running?

Better go catch it!

I grew up in the boonies poor...

Great OP, Waterman! :rofl:

[Me.]

42. Well They're All Drinking The Kool-Ais

I just don't know what it's laced with now that Timothy Leary has passed.

[blogslut]

44. Dr. Murray Conrad...

*snicker*

[MineralMan]

46. Your fox link is a mailto: link.

Somehow, you've messed up the link insertion. That's not an email address. The other link takes you to Bachmann's donation whine. If this is supposed to be satire, you need to do something else with the links. Very annoying.

[H2O Man]

53. "Very annoying"?????

In what way?

[MineralMan]

55. In the way that clicking on it opened my mail client application

and wasted my time. It's not a huge deal, but an annoying one.

I've been known to post a satirical piece now and then here, too. Any links I include are clear signals of my intent and will do nothing more than open a new tab and display an error, since the URL doesn't actually exist. I test them before posting to make sure they don't lead to a valid site.

I also include clues to the satirical nature of the post within the post. Even so, a few people miss it and think the story's real. When people post stuff from the Onion or other satire sites, the source link usually makes it obvious that the post is a satire. I think it's important to signal satire, even if subtly. Knowing Bachmann's tendency to say incredibly stupid things, just about anything could be true.

[H2O Man]

56. Oh deer!

It wasted what? Two seconds? Three?

Perhaps if you had read the link before opening it, you would have recognized the obvious.

Keep this in mind next October, when I next post one of my Fox News Flashes!

[MineralMan]

57. I edited the post you're replying to to add additional stuff.

[H2O Man]

59. I think it

had many "hints" that it was satire.

[MineralMan]

62. OK. Good enough, then.

[itsrobert]

58. Yup, very annoying and unoriginal

Some with an unrefined sense of humor might like it. This is not Jon Stewart/ONION/Colbert worthy.

[H2O Man]

64. "unoriginal"

I dare you to find this elsewhere. Double-dare you.

[fascisthunter]

68. but it pisses you off so that counts around here

[H2O Man]

69. Better than

500 "recommends"!

[Matariki]

48. nevermind...

[Rex]

49. Onion-worthy H2O Man!

:thumbsup:

[dtexdem]

52. Hey, it might not be drug abuse.

Perry might well have a prescription for thorazine to treat mental illness. ;-)

[dogknob]

61. Yes. He might be taking it as precribed...

[WI_DEM]

65. Murray Conrad!? LOL!! is this the Onion?

[NeedleCast]

66. Now THIS is what I've beenw wainting for

This is what happens when you let the crazies take over your party. This is going to be many fun months from here on out.

Well done H20 Man! Got me. Still, I found it perfectly believable, considering the source.

[L0oniX]

71. Acid rock ...LMFAO ...so uhm Hendrix was???

[Fire Walk With Me]

72. With nothing left to attack, they begin to attack each other.