Said on the TeeVee

[Scuba]

Leno


What's the difference between Lindsay Lohan and Rick Perry? It only takes Lindsay four and a half hours to finish a sentence.

I think there's one more thing Perry can forget, too: Being president.



Conan

Tomorrow is 11-11-11! Or as Rick Perry calls it: “11-11-Wait don't tell me, I will get this. I know there is a third one.”



Letterman


When you have a little trouble recalling, they call that a senior moment. More like Bush, junior moment.



Ferguson


It's not a good week for Republican memories. Rick Perry forgot the name of the agency he wanted to cut. Herman Cain forgot there was a harassment settlement. And Ron Paul forgot he has no chance of winning.



Kimmel

Most analysts agree the big debate winner last night was Mitt Romney, who stuck closely to his strategy of not being any of the other candidates.

Michele Bachmann says she won't rest until Obamacare is repealed. Or until she kidnaps all 101 Dalmatians.

If there's one thing I know about Rick Perry, it's that he doesn't go down without a fight and he's already turning last night's negative into a — I wouldn't say a positive, but a double negative.



Fallon


Big news from last night’s Republican debate, you guys. It turns out George Bush was actually the smart Texas governor.

Look, I know these Rick Perry jokes are a little mean, but tomorrow, he won’t even remember them.

[Yooperman]

1. I love Fallon... LOL.... n/t

:toast: