Does having kids make you happier? Only if you're over 40

[seabeyond]

The study found that parents under 30 were less happy than couples with no children, according to a report published in the March issue of Population and Development Review. And the more children a young family had, the less happy the parents were.

Other studies have shown that having kids doesn’t necessarily lead to happiness. What’s interesting in this study is the change that occurs after age 30. The negative impact of kids diminished as parents got older. And the trend completely turned around for parents in their 40s and beyond. These older parents’ happiness grew with the increasing size of their broods.

“It may be that younger parents have a lot going on in their lives,” said Rachel Margolis, a study co-author and a demographer who is working on her Ph.D. at the University of Pennsylvania. “They may be be less happy because they are over-tired and have less money.”

*

One thing the researchers can’t know is whether the older parents were happy because they were done, or close to done, with child rearing – the “whew, I just managed to raise four kids and they turned out OK” effect – or whether the older parents were happy because they raised a family later in life, after they’d accomplished many of their other goals.

http://moms.today.com/_news/2011/03/09/6230495-does-having-kids-make-you-happier-only-if-youre-over-40

____________________

there are downsides to being an old parent. but, man, i am so happy with my choices. i believe it was all about me spending my 20's selfishly focused on myself and having the ability to indentify exactly what i wanted in life. ergo, able to create.

[phantom power]

1. I will mention one down-side to being a parent at 40...

My six-year-old has lots and lots (and lots) of energy. My middle-aged self... less so.

[dixiegrrrrl]

3. Which is the one reason I am happy I had mine in my early 20's.

Most of my "other directed" goals developed AFTER the boys hit their teens, so it worked out well for me.
I think there are too many variables in parenthood to make a broad statement about parental age & happiness.

[phantom power]

4. Yeah, I don't see how there's any one right or wrong strategy.

With anything as complex as "raising a child" or "living a life" or "being happy," it's a matter of individual circumstances, and personality, and values. And then it comes down to a lot of guess-work and tradeoffs.

[seabeyond]

6. good and bad and even in bad there is a higher and lower

vibration. whatever path we chose.

i was not point a finger at one choice or another. we have the ability to make either work.

[HopeHoops]

5. That's one of my FAVORITE cartoons, but my all-time favorite Calvin is the coffee table...

1) Calvin hammering nails into coffee table
2) Mom screaming "CALVIN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?"
3) Calvin casually looking down at the nails.
4) Calvin: "Is this a trick question?"

[gkhouston]

8. My favorite is the snowmen tumbled over to look like they've been hit by a car.

As for the "happier" question, maybe older parents have a little more money so there's less financial pressure. Or it could be that the older you are, the more realistic you become about what kids are like and are supposed to be like so you don't stress so much. :-)

[seabeyond]

10. handful of things. right about $. more realistic. also it seems i am more comfortable in self

not worried concerned what other thinks... so that puts me in a wonderful place. more mellow.

[catabryna]

2. I'm going with this one...

"...or whether the older parents were happy because they raised a family later in life, after they’d accomplished many of their other goals."

It's close to my reality.

:hi:

[seabeyond]

7. me too.... but then it also worked for me to make my marriage easy, too. nt

[Gaedel]

9. I am 71

I am 71 and I truly enjoy taking my very good-looking (my opinion) 30 year old granddaughter out to dinner and seeing the outraged looks on the old biddies and the young bucks as we share a good dinner and a bottle of wine and have an intelligent conversation.

[seabeyond]

11. my father likes to play that game when he and i go out. he looks so foolish

but whatever. at 72 that is his fun, oh well.

with the very young waitreses. btw

[Littlecat]

12. I had my third child at 41

and we're trying for our 4th (at 43). My other two are 23 and 15. I think my coping skills have gotten much better and I don't stress about every little thing like I use to. I also feel that I appreciate my little one more than I did his brothers because I know how fast he will grow up.

[seabeyond]

13. interesting.

i could have done one more.... i was 33 and 36.