Not wearing a wedding ring and having food cravings? Must be an unwed teen mom!

[Zephie]

This morning I got up and walked to a Dennys near my home, and went with the intention of getting pancakes. They were about all I could think about, but on the walk there that changed and I found myself ready to kill for biscuits and gravy with mozzarella sticks. So I get there and order, and notice that a group of four older women in the booth across from me are looking at me really strangely as I did. I waved hello and then waited for my food. Once it came I started eating, and like the past few days it's take a few bites, sit and fight the need to throw up, then eat some more. After a few minutes of this one of the women got up and approached me.

"That's quite a selection you have there, are you pregnant?" I said that I was and I can't believe this but she responded with "Was it unplanned? I noticed you weren't wearing a wedding ring and we're afraid that you might make the wrong choices for your baby. We wanted to offer you some guidance and young unwed mothers like you have a tendency to make poor choices." I'm sitting there dumbfounded and finally responded "I'm married and in my 20s." she responded "Lying is a sin just as bad as lust. You need to work on your connection with God young lady. You can't possibly be out of your teens. I'd like to sit and pray with you." I said nothing, flagged down my waitress and asked to move.

How is that ok? These people make me sick(er)! On the way out I saw them all get into a car with Scott and Rubio stickers on them. I'm really, really pissed. These people think it's ok to harass random women based on their food choices to make sure they're either not pregnant or pregnant only according to their standards! I wish I had thrown up on her. :eyes:

Edit for grammar, sorry!

[XanaDUer]

1. Too bad you couldn't have puked on her

nt.

[Liberal_in_LA]

2. wow! unbelievable! Definitely inappropriate comments and behavior

[buddysmellgood]

3. That's unbelievable.

[FreakinDJ]

4. It is a struggle for me to be nice to the "Door to Door Preachers" too

if what they had was so great people would be naturally attracted to it and they would have to go pushing it off on others

[Zephie]

7. I've had the worst luck in diner style resturants around here.

Last year I had someone try to evangelize me because it looked like I had been crying directly prior to coming in to a local Perkins (I had, but that's really not their business.) The WAITRESS actually tried it that time. I was naive and told her I was happy with my religion. She invited herself to sit down and try to talk to me about God. I got up and walked out of that one.

[wickerwoman]

33. That happened to me too!

Except I hadn't been crying, I'd been walking in the rain and I had some raindrops coming out of my obviously wet hair down my cheeks.

I sit down in a restaurant and a complete stranger walked up and said it was OK to talk to her about whatever was upsetting me and maybe she could offer some advice. I told her politely to buzz off and then ordered breakfast.

I wonder if they're training them to do this somewhere.

[Raine]

65. I'm in Los Angeles and one time I was shopping with my mother at the local mall

I left her in a store and went to sit on a bench. Some knucklehead sat down next to me and says "are you saved"? :wtf: I said "None of your business, I haven't got time for this crap" and beat a path back into the store. it seems there is nowhere safe from these self-righteous morons. :argh:

[Ernesto]

24. I ask them what their address is so I can come to their home

to bother them about the "good news" of being a non-believer!

[Siwsan]

5. I've had people show up at my front door, offering to share

their "testimony" and discuss my relationship with "the Lord". I always tell them that we are Orthodox Druids, and have a few things we might like to share with them. They always make a hasty exit.

[Missy Vixen]

44. We stopped being nice about it and started telling religious

solicitors that we will call the police if they ever step foot on our property again.

They persist.

:eyes:

I have to hand it to the OP for her grace. The women concerned should have been removed from the restaurant for harassing another patron.

p.s. My favorite story is the two Jehovah's Witnesses that came to the door to talk to me "about Jesus". I told them DH is Jewish and I am an agnostic. They looked horrified. "He's a JEW?"

I just smiled. "Oh, yeah. A big one. If you're not off my front porch in ten seconds, I'm calling the police."

[GoneOffShore]

48. Haven't done this yet, but it's now in my arsenal -

"I'm so glad to see you! We're just about to sacrifice the goat and need somebody to hold his head. Quick, take off your clothes!"

[liberal life]

59. we started handing out dvds with political/informational movies...

and they stopped coming by....haven't seen them in years.

[Iggo]

6. Did they take you to jail after you punched her lights out?

You did punch her, didn't you?

[XanaDUer]

9. She could have started screaming, Help! Help!

"She's trying to kill my baby!"

And then have the cops come.

Just kidding. Puking is better.

[titaniumsalute]

8. Hey take it as a compliment...

You're pregnant and look awesome! They can't believe a nice lady in her 20's can't look young?

[Zephie]

15. Thats the kicker, I'm only in my 7th week

I'm not even showing or anything, it's just cravings and morning sickness. Talk about a leap of judgement on their part!

[Sherman A1]

19. Agreed

The ladies were certainly obnoxious and what she said was completely wrong, nevertheless the situation is over and I would suggest simply making the best out if it you can. They were rude, but don't give their rudeness any more thought or any more of your time.

Hope all goes well for you and all. Best of luck to you.

[titaniumsalute]

43. Yup...that was basically my point

YEars ago I was a radio talk show host. I was dating a girl who died from some medical complications. I was only 21 years old. That was a pretty tough on me obviously. I went back to work a week later to get my mind off things. The first night I was on the air some kids called in and asked "How's your dead girlfriend." I don't remember what I said or did but it taught me a lesson. 15 years later I still think about how I felt. When I start to say something to someone I try to remember what was said to me that hurt. I've probably saved myself from saying stupid-assed things a bunch of times because of that.

On a side note when I have cravings for ice cream or bacon I can't blame it on anything. :(

[Taverner]

10. Your story infuriates me

Where do those dumb assholes feel the right to judge you - make assumptions and say what they did?

Honestly I would have slapped that harpy so hard her dentures would have flown against the wall, shattering into pieces

Is there any wonder WHY I hate these people? And yes, I do HATE them with a passion

[Lorien]

20. Me too. And I would have come back at her so viciously she never would

have even CONSIDERED harassing another woman again!

[Taverner]

22. Yep. I would have ordered milk just to splash it in her frace

Then again, I'm not a woman.

How some women take that kind of abuse without going full on postal is a mystery to me

[Drale]

11. You showed remarkable restraint

Those women probably deserved a good "Go Fuck yourself" or something similar. Although really screw with them I would have said ok lets pray O GREAT SATIN! :rofl:

[TheWraith]

12. Wow. If that had happened to me, they would never have found the body.

Seriously, I can't imagine any way that they could be more obnoxious.

[JVS]

13. LOL! Yeah, they're pretty nosey.

[pipi_k]

14. Aside from the obvious...

which is that this woman had no business accosting you in that manner, you're lucky that people think you're still a teenager.

I recall many years when I was also accused of lying when I would tell people my age because I looked so young.


Even at 58 I don't look my age.

But anyway, I think you handled the situation well. Except it probably would have been a whole lot more fun for us to know you HAD ralphed all over her.

:7

[XanaDUer]

17. Right - that projectile-type vomiting pregnancy brings

Then she could have smiled at the old bag, wiped off her mouth, and said sweetly, "Sorry, you know, ladies' things."

[pipi_k]

34. Along with...

plenty of stomach acid that would make immediate holes in whatever the woman was wearing...

:7

[Codeine]

16. Just knock the living fuck out of the old bitch.

God I hate busybodies.

[JoePhilly]

18. Should have said "sure sit down ... My name is Mary, I AM pregnant, and I'm a virgin too!"

A lot of these religious types think they are better than you are.

They think they have the authority to talk down to you. To tell you that THEY know the secret, and that you don't.

You can't punch them in the face, and you really can't yell at them in anger (because that would be rude) ... so, might as well MOCK them some ...

Ask them some questions that they can't answer. Tell them you wanted to order Shrimp but Leviticus says its an abomination. Ask if she eats Shrimp.

Ask, "If Jesus came back after 3 days the first time, why is it taking him over 2000 years to get his ass back here again?"

Bring them down a few pegs off their lofty perch, and they'll go away questioning whether that should do the same to some one else.

[gtar100]

21. Being stupid comes with the unfortunate side effect of not knowing when to shut up.

That was completely inappropriate for them to say but unfortunately it takes someone with intelligence to understand that. They sound like a group of self-righteous individuals which only makes them more likely to say stupid crap like they did to you.

[Ratty]

23. Jesus was gay

I would have informed them in a very calm, kindly, loving voice. Then all quite reasonably, described to them what he likely did with the apostles.

[1monster]

25. Next time (if there is a next time) be prepared. Ask why she could POSSIBLY

ask such a personal question and why she wants to know?

If she has the chutzpah to answer, tell her (politely) that while you are sure she means well, you and the state of your uterus is none of her concern and ask her to leave your table.

If she continues, call the waitress and make sure the waitress knows that the reason you want to move is that the woman is harassing you.

Either that or pitch a fit that is audible throughout the restaurant.

[barbtries]

26. that's outrageous

going up to someone in a restaurant like that. they had no right to ruin your meal like that. assholes.

[davidthegnome]

27. Holy shit

Admirable restraint, very admirable restraint. I can't believe the nerve those people have. Fortunately I live in a rural area where I usually don't have to suffer these people. If I did, I'm not sure what I'd do, but it definitely would have been very unkind - nothing at all like the manner in which you responded.

You are a far better person than those idiots could ever be. I'm sorry you had to put up with them.

[EC]

28. I'll bet they even sit in bus stations looking for girls

getting off the bus in the big city...just like pimps, hustlers and sex-trade providers do.


It really pisses me off when someone interrupts a meal that I'm paying for. I would have been livid that they felt "invited or entitled" to butt into my meal.

[Ilsa]

29. It's really difficult living in these fundie states, isn't it? They feel

Perfectly justified and entitled in dishing out all their judgment and religious shit on anyone willing to put up with listening to them.

You showed remarkable restraint, and patience which will serve you well as a parent.

Yes, I wish you had blown chunks in her face.

[timtom]

30. That is NOT ok!

If it had been a genuine concern for you, it could have been excused (if you had been so inclined). But her horrible accusation is almost unforgivable.

I notice you live in Tampa Bay area. I'm in West Palm Beach, and I've never been proselytized in any way since 1948 (less'n I was in church). That is beyond rude.

[Zephie]

32. Lucky! I am really tired of this state

We're making plans to move to Portland Ore next summer. Florida is not such a friendly place to be anymore, at least around here. I'm super excited for the RNC convention next year :sarcasm:

I'm hoping we'll have moved before then.

[timtom]

39. Portland, Oregon???

NOW who's lucky. I've wanted to be there since the early 80's. But couldn't, for a variety of almost insurmountable reasons.

Also -- RNC? I guess I haven't been paying attention. Where? Tampa?

[Zephie]

40. Yep, Tampa. They announced it... last year I believe?

http://blogs.wsj.com/washwire/2010/05/12/its-official-rnc-selects-tampa-for-2012-convention/

They apparently were having second thoughts earlier this year but it seems that it's still full steam ahead.

Edit for better link.

[ljm2002]

31. I'm afraid I would have told them to shove their nosey noses...

...right up their fat asses.

Excuse the crudity, but really! How DARE they intrude on you in that way! You don't have to justify your presence anywhere, or eating anything you wish to eat.

Sputtering mad here, just hearing about that. Grrrr.

[Ilsa]

35. I rememberr my appetite going through the roof when i was 4 weeks along,

Actually, before I even knew I was pregnant. I had to tale off my wedding ring early also. I didn't get fat, just 32 pounds, but my fingers thickened up, and I didn't want to deal with trying to get it off later.

I read some of your Tweets. Keep up the good work!

[Zephie]

36. I actually had to get it cut off last summer when my hand became very swollen

It was a cheap ring (my sweetie and I were so enamored with each other we practically ran to the altar with whatever money we had on us at the time!) and Hubby and I decided we wanted to save up and get a nice expensive one instead of replacing it with another lower end one.

Thanks for reading it! I'm a total twitter addict. :hug:

[Dappleganger]

37. You should have told her that you were carrying the spawn of Satan.

And watched her head spin around. ;)

[BlueIris]

38. "Was it unplanned?" What an ass.

That would make me want to throw things.

[BR_Parkway]

41. I thought it was just us homos who were supposed to shove our agenda down others throats

Shame you didn't puke on her, she'd have been convinced you were possessed by a demon

[XanaDUer]

42. Only if she'd eaten pea soup before the puking.

nt.

[Gormy Cuss]

45. Learn to return an icy glare.

Never engage someone who is so pathetically rude that they would ask a stranger if she's pregnant, never mind follow up with such nosy comments. When you start showing you'll get plenty of unsolicited comments, so develop the skill NOW.

[onethatcares]

46. should have asked her for a $1000.00,

then thrown up on her.

yeah, right there at the table.

good luck with your pregnancy.:hi:

[noamnety]

47. So many good comebacks!

"I appreciate the concern but with being pregnant and all, my uterus is so damn packed I just don't think there's room in it for both the baby and your nose."

[Raine]

67. I really love that one

it's terrific! :thumbsup:

[Initech]

49. This is why I have such a problem with Xtianity.

They think their way is the only way to live, and that everyone else who doesn't live the way they think they should is a "sinner". I don't like it when people preach to others and consistently pursue it even if the other person lost interest.

[hayu_lol]

52. You did ok...

two ways to handle the situation:

1. (the most fun)throw a glass of water on the nuisance.

2. Flag the waitress, tell him/her to get the manager. Manager comes to your table. Explain the situation and ask that he escort the nuisance back to her own table...or throw her butt out of the restaurant--manager's choice.

[Initech]

53. I tell my friends I'm a recovering Christian.

I went to a church like that, where they pulled that crap all the time (and I mean all the fucking time - public square preaching, that kind of crap), and it was quite an eye-opener. I decided flat-out I didn't want to be a part of that, and that was definitely one of the best decisions I've made in my life.

[sudopod]

57. Successful memes are good at reproduction.

It's their nature. :)

[Initech]

60. Stalin was right - you repeat the lie long enough and it eventually becomes fact.

[sudopod]

61. Seriously, though, the idea

of memetics as an explanation for the...tenacity of modern religions makes perfect sense. (I may be about to say things you already know)

Richard Dawkins thought of memes as a sort of cultural analog to genes. A successful meme (in this case, a religion) does one or more of the following:

1) It spurs its adherents to spread itself continually
2) It demands a high degree of accuracy in this replication, that is, orthodoxy.
3) It commandeers several powerful drivers of behavior, including the need to belong to a larger group, survival instinct, and sexual drives.
4) It commands its adherents to attack roadblocks to further transmission, including unbelievers and heretics.

It only makes sense that the longer human civilization and mass communication exist, the more potent such ideas will become due to selection pressure, which is ironic considering many of those religions are hostile to the idea (lolz). This list is not maximally inclusive, there are other, lesser drivers of behavior that they can take advantage of as well. Less dangerous memes include the rickroll and lolcats, which spread because they are amusing rather than all-consuming.

Look at the top ten religions in the world. Most of them carry grave consequences for unbelievers, including some form of...undesirable consequence or punishment for unbelief in the afterlife. The remainder are closely tied to national or local identities, which seem to be a weaker sort of meme. Once your nation is kaput, the national religion tends to go, too. There aren't so many Azadis and Zoroastrians around anymore.

It seems easier to deal with fundamentalists when they are viewed as victims of a very potent bad idea, rather than obnoxious busybodies actively choosing to ruin your day. That's easier for me, though, since I grew up with them, am a white man, and can pass as "normal." I feel terrible that the OP had to put up with this. :/

[ThomCat]

50. Wow! I'm sorry you had to deal with that shit.

:(

People like that are are truly obnoxious. You have to wonder how they can consider themselves good people for being that judgmental and pushy. :(

[felix_numinous]

51. Ask for the manager of the restaurant and complain.

and if they do not respond you can write it up in the newspaper, and write the upper management at Denny's. It may or may not have results you can measure, but it may make you feel a lot better. Like writing to us at DU :)

Women are going to have to make a big stink all over again--Women's Rights groups need to be revived big time.

[Zephie]

54. I don't blame the resturant, I just wonder where people get off doing things like that

I mean, come on! Who does that? (well, obviously, they do.) I agree, womens rights are becoming a joke these days even among other women. I'm so surprised, I wonder how she would have felt if someone had pulled that back in the day on her! It just makes you scratch your head.

[jtuck004]

55. But their religion tells them it is their DUTY, godammit, to save people like you.

Like a Wall Street Investment banker, what you think or care about is not of the slightest concern to them. They are the earthly representatives of the Prime Mover and you are their target.

Well, that and the senior special...


Congratulations, btw.

[Shagbark Hickory]

56. You could have had fun with them. Tell them you were planning on having the baby there in the

restroom at dennys.
Sorry to hear they harassed you tho.

[Capitalocracy]

64. Thanks, but I'm raising my baby a devout Satanist.

That would've worked too.

[Shagbark Hickory]

69. Or tell them you're with the FLDS. Make them think you're hard core! Then proceed to tell them how

they're going to hell for not stopping the baby deaths good enough!

[liberal life]

58. wow, your calm restraint is just...wow.....with all those pregnancy hormones going crazy too...

good luck with babski on the way
:toast:


http://fucorporatemedia.com/

[Odin2005]

62. And Evangelicals dare get mad when i tell them that I HATE Christianity.

FUCK THEM!

[Raine]

63. Jesus Christ! That is one of the most outrageous things

I've ever heard! :wtf: I think I would've told them to mind their own fucking business and go screw themselves! :mad: :grr:

[Terra Alta]

66. You showed tremendous restraint.

The nerve of some people. And folks wonder why I don't like to call myself a Christian.

[EFerrari]

68. Obnoxious panty sniffers.

Tell them stealing your time is a sin.

[JoeyT]

70. Cue someone complaining about how you oppressed that poor woman

by complaining about it and not automatically converting.

Folks like this are why I now answer even the most innocent sounding question with "None of your business.".