Goose levels golfer, reasserts dominance over humankind

[pnwmom]

https://www.cnn.com/2018/04/24/us/goose-golf-attack-michigan-photos-trnd/

CNN)Geese are terrifying. Everyone knows this. Their bites hurt like hell and they have no respect for children or the elderly. In fact, they are the second-most terrifying bird behind turkeys (large, tenacious) and ahead of crows (eidetic, vengeful).

So this momentous trio of photographs showing a Canada goose absolutely trucking a high school golfer near Blissfield, Michigan, is just a reminder of the natural order of things. You can have, as one Twitter user put it, a "quiver full of bird maulers" and a whole high school athlete's worth of physical power, but the goose is going to win every time. It's science.

The unlucky human sacrifice here is Isaac Couling, a member of the Concord High School golf team. According to Blissfield Golf Coach Steve Babbitt, Couling, 16, was competing in the Madison Tournament at the World Creek Golf Course in Adrian, Michigan, when terror rained down.

"The group just finished teeing off on hole #7 and were walking down the fairway," Babbitt told CNN in an email. "They were aware of a goose nest on their left which they were looking at but not bothering when from behind them and to the right came the guard goose (protecting the nest)."

[Ferrets are Cool]

1. If mankind did not have the ability to produce weapons, we would not be

very high on the pecking order of animals. I've always said that macho men would REALLY show how "big and strong" they are if they killed animals with the same tools the animals use. In other words, fuck all hunters who kill for sport.

[Hortensis]

2. That's a little goose, too. The one that came at me

when I opened a gate while appraising a property was a domestic bird nearly as tall as me (or seemed like it) and several times wider with those wings spread. Mercifully it saw me at once, before I had a chance to step all the way inside, or who knows. I would have been on my own, clipboard v. bird.

[pnwmom]

3. That must have been a shock!

[Hortensis]

4. Lol, I'll die remembering that bird. I'm no gladiator.