Making fun of someone who died of cancer, has cancer, or potentially has cancer is NO JOKE!!!!!!

[loyalkydem]

This is going to be painful for me to type this as I am a very private person, but as friends and family have pointed out, sometimes getting support is more medicine than just not getting any support at all. I have had enough of right wing trolls who have attacked Joe Soptic over the poor man who lost his wife to cancer in 22 days.

My family has suffered with cancer. You have no idea what we go through when a family member has cancer. My father for example, may he rest in peace, died of pancreatic cancer. Lucky for us, medicare was able tot ti take care of him and allowed him to live out for about 12 months before he finally died in 2008.

My grandfather and my grandmother also died of cancer but were able to live because of medicare coverage. The only person in my family that was not able to benefit from medicare was my Uncle Melvin who died in just six months upon learning he had the same disease my father had.

Recently, I just learned that I may be have Leukemia which as you know w is a disease of the blood. When the doctor tells you that you have Leukemic cells but they can't determine your blood count and that they must send the blood off for testing, the waiting game is what kills you. Your mind dwells on the possibility that you may get sick. That adds stress on you like you wouldn't believe.

The uncertainly, the fear, it messes with your mind. You want an answer right away but you know you can't and you have to wait while at the same time people telling you that it's going to be all right. It's very scary waiting to find out weather you have a disease like Leukemia. Thankfully, I have a great support group of friends on facebook and I have my family encouraging me.

But what makes me angry is the fact that I see Republican trolls posting hateful messages against Joe Soptic. The man lost his job through NO FAULT of his own okay. This caused him to lose his health insurance, his wife did have a part time job with benefits but lost her job. There for she lost her insurance.

Please read my words carefully as I'm holding back tears as I type this. Please listen to the commercial as Joe tells his painful story. He at no point accused Mitt Romney of murder. You're being spoon fed talking points from the right. Do not dare make fun or show how hatred you are of people who have had cancer or are going through cancer without reading the facts of what these people have to go through.

All forms of cancer are painful to deal with and its taking me all the courage I have to type this post out. So please keep an open mind when dealing with cancer survivors or people who are potentially having to deal with the illness. Thank you.

[JohnnyLib2]

1. So painfully true. Thank you.

[darkangel218]

2. :'( Im so sorry you have to go through this

The wait is the worse x I went through something similar a few months ago. I recently relocated from south to central FL and I went to a different gyno. He "decided" that I have a "mass" on one of my ovaries and decided to take it out. By a leap of faith , i wund up having an MRI before surgery and it turned out there was nothing on my ovary, just a fibroid. So doctors CAN and are wrong so many times. Whatever it is, stay strong and fight it!! *hugs*!!!!

[mrs_p]

3. thank you for speaking up

peace and love

[freshwest]

6. +1

[yellerpup]

4. You have my respect and compassion.

Thank you for sharing your feelings and wishing you the very best of health in the future. Peace.

[demwing]

5. this post

should have a million, billion recs

[Kalidurga]

7. They get uglier by the day...

They don't dispute that Joe Soptic lost his wife. They just insinuate that he could have done something different. Never mind that doing something different could have caused a food shortage in the house. I am assuming that he made around 12 bucks an hour on his second job and that insurance for two people would cost around 700 hundred dollars and that it would be next to impossible for one person to pay all the bills. They are a sick sick people now and I hope that the ACA will enable more of the RWers access to mental health care.

[Texas-Limerick]

19. Soptic Joe

Down in Kansas City where the workers all go
There a big steelworker named Soptic  Joe
Married his high school sweetheart, his  perfect match
She had a  heart of gold and was so pretty, what a catch
Soptic Joe, now look at him go
Soptic, Soptic
Soptic Joe, go man go
Oh, oh, oh, oh Soptic Joe

She snuggled up to him when they went down the road
They bought a little house, and  he happily carried the load
An old fixer upper, making their time together a little more fun
And had a big back yard , where their little ones could run
Soptic Joe, now look at him go
Soptic, Soptic
Soptic Joe, go man go
Oh, oh, oh , oh Soptic Joe

One day they called him to the office, 
to see the clerk
They offered him a buyout, but Joe said, buddy, I'd rather work
Work was hard but steady,  he wasn't told things had  changed
He didn't know the truth, until the day the gate was chained
Soptic Joe, now look at him go
Soptic, Soptic
Soptic Joe, go man go
Oh, oh, oh, oh Soptic Joe

Soptic Joe was out of work, for six months straight
Before he took a low paying job, for his family's sake
He'd have to pay for the family coverage, it was very crude
But Joe had other obligations, like shelter and  food
Soptic Joe, now look at him go
Soptic, Soptic
Soptic Joe, go man go
Oh, oh, oh, oh Soptic Joe

It was tough but they lived on love, she was no ordinary chick
Until the day his sweet wife said, honey I feel sick
She kept it to herself, while she gave and gave
Until the doctors told Joe, she was impossible to save
Soptic Joe, look at him go
Soptic, Soptic
Soptic Joe, go man go
Oh oh oh oh Soptic Joe
Oh huh-oh oh, poor Joe

[Kalidurga]

23. This needs someone to put music to it go on YouTube and go viral...

Very good lyrics. Very sad , but it gives this couple life and it will make people understand.

[Texas-Limerick]

30. Thanks

Joe is being treated very harshly on RW sites, so I wanted to present a different view. As for the music, I blatantly borrowed from Surfer Joe, but I envision it played more slowly, solemnly by an older Johnny Cash.

&feature=youtube_gdata_player

[Kalidurga]

47. That is eerie I heard Johnny Cash when I read your lyrics nt.

[Tikki]

8. I know your pain and loss...

I lost my dear mother-in-law to cancer...I loved her so.




Tikki

[RebelOne]

9. I know that no one at DI has ever made fun of those with cancer or any life-threatening ailment.

Both my sister and my mother died of cancer. My sister was only 54 years old. I hope your blood tests will show you do not have leukemia.

Best of luck.

[noiretextatique]

44. me too...

my littler sister died 6 years old from breast cancer at age 45, and my dad just 4 months before her of lung cancer. there is nothing funny about cancer.

[Lone_Star_Dem]

10. Thank you so very much for this.

I'm not as brave as you just were, but I feel your words resonating through my soul as if they were my own.

Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

Edit to add: there's a cancer support group on DU. For someone with your abilities to speak about this like you have, I thought it may be of some help. If you don't want to post it's still somehow comforting to read it occasionally.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=forum&id=1146

[Raine]

11. Anyone who jokes about cancer might end up dealing with Karma. :-( nt

[Ken Burch]

22. And even THESE guys won't be able to help the poor fool who does that:

[cleduc]

12. The media was so eager on this a bunch of them missed loyalkydem's

point. Ed Shultz probably got the closest of the ones I saw

The ad made more than one point:
1. Obviously, Bain closing down that plant and walking away with a bundle of dough was brutal and absolutely devastating to that man's town and his own quality of life

2. Without healthcare, his wife lost her chances to avoid or overcome cancer.

To some extent, Bain would have some responsibility for the predicament that man found himself in with no healthcare but because so much time had passed, not 100% and maybe far from it depending on how one looks at it.

But this GOP candidate wants to get rid of Obamacare. And it seemed to take his poor PR person's gaffe of honest expression to get that second point of the ad across to more of the media.

Healthcare is a gigantic issue for this election. Whether Bain was involved or not, the lack of healthcare may well have cost that man his wife. That is hardly an unfair point to make in this election. According to that Harvard or MIT study, 49,000 people have been dying annually because of a lack of health care (that's flirting with 16 911s per year). Mitt Romney wants to return to that until the individual states get around to doing something about it - which we already know won't happen with most states controlled by the GOP.

Back to loyalkydem's post, we too have lost members to cancer. I'm so sorry for your losses.

[ErikJ]

13. As many now see-they are Sociopaths.

No compassion, no empathy.

[RVN VET]

15. Empathy, indeed!

Recall what the right wing tried to make of Obama's use of the word -- and you're right, they are all of them sociopaths, heartless. selfish insects. The tried to make "empathy" a code word for socialism (which they also pretended was code for communism which, of course, was somehow directly linked up with Islamic extremism).

And too many people listened to their attacks on "empathy" and believed the lies -- and still do. Yes, of course, laugh at the sick, laugh at the bereaved. Rush Buttpimple mocked a kid who'd suffered brain damage in a horrible traffic accident -- and his g-d d--n audience laughed along with him! Then this miserable, overpaid coward doubled down and mocked Michael J. Fox's tremors -- and they all laughed themselve silly once again!

I am tired of the whole sad, cankerous, cold-blooded, lying lot of them. Were I religious, I'd wish them all to hell -- and offer to be their damned limo driver to make sure they got there.

[smirkymonkey]

16. +10,000

I am sorry for your predicament and I hate what they are doing to people. I can only hope that they never get away with it.

[calimary]

34. Well said. VERY well said.

I hope they never get away with it, too, smirkymonkey.

Hmm - what's with these people anyway? I was always taught you do NOT mock someone in pain. You do NOT sneer at someone else's misfortune. You do NOT kick somebody when they're down. That's nothing but low-life behavior. What you're SUPPOSED TO do is be truly Christian about it - offer to help if you can, show courtesy and compassion, and say a prayer. And if you can't help that person, individually, then dammit, find a place to donate, volunteer, or find another way to contribute. If you can't help him, surely there are others closer to you, in your own community, who genuinely need your help also.

Like it or not, teabaggers, we all ARE our brother's keepers. That's what your very own Bible talks about. Check out the New Testament sometime when you're taking a break between mockings, bastards! Check out the Beatitudes. And then hang your heads in shame.

[Ken Burch]

21. The real message of today's Right is this:

"You can only be free if you're a total bastard!"

[riverbendviewgal]

14. I can understand what you are going through.

In 1998 my 24 year old son had seizures and was rushed to the hospital and 3 days later was getting brain surgery. He was diagnosed with a GBM brain tumour, same as Ted Kennedy. His dad was diagnosed two months later with Non Hodgkin's lymphoma. Our son lived for 18 months and his dad followed him 18 months after.
I think I would have been much worse in frame of mind if we had to worry about medical bills. In Canada we don't worry about those things.

I am so grateful for living here. Reading all the threads on DU make me thankful.

There are times when doctors are wrong so don't give up. One of my best friends was diagnosed with a brain tumor in 2002...not the same as my son's. She is still living.

The Republicans are ignorant and they are full of fear. So much that they spout hate.

You have support on DU...and remember we are all in this boat together.

[tavalon]

39. I would never, ever envy what you've gone through,

but I envy your universal health care.

I'm so sorry about what happened to your family.

[Smilo]

17. Hate is easy

but doing what you have done - speaking out takes a lot of courage - A LOT.

Cancer is a terrible disease - I have lost a parent and friends to cancer. Take heart loyalkydem - there are many out here who know of what you speak, who send you love and healing thoughts.

Yes hate is easy for those on the right, because they are spineless and have no thoughts or compassion for others.

Sending you hugs and peace.

[Flatpicker]

18. You're

Talking about a group that made jokes about wounded vets.

Do you really think they have any conscience, or heart, or anything that makes compassion a part of their lives?

Sometimes, it seems like we are dealing with a different species all together. They just can't relate.

[calimary]

35. You're also talking about a group that cheers for executions, catcalls about

"just let 'em DIE!" AND boo a brave soldier on active duty ON THE FIELD OF BATTLE, who's volunteered to put his own ass on the line in harm's way while they sit at home on their own fat lazy selfish good-for-nothing judgmental asses and boo him - just because he's gay.

WHAT A DISGRACE!!!!!!!

The only thing worse than that, on that horrible evening, was the candidates all standing there onstage at their nice little lecterns, pretty maids all in a row, silent as a graveyard while this was going on in the audience in front of them. NOT ONE of them stepped forward to speak out and silence the crowd and try to be a TRUE leader, and teach them a little something about respect. They all just stood there in silence, thus offering their tacit agreement.

That debate just made me sick. I REVILE and ABHOR those awful, hideous, selfish, callous, unsympathetic, unfeeling non-compassionate jerks. ANTI-compassionate jerks! I bet their great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandfathers were all out there eagerly throwing stones at the "sinners" Jesus spoke up for, so smug in their certainty that THEY themselves were without sin.

[Ken Burch]

20. Making fun of a guy whose wife died of cancer due to his greed-mandated layoff...

...is the adult version of being a schoolyard bully.

A decent society has to band together and shout "NOT FUCKING COOL!"

[shireen]

24. not just cancer

Any disease that kills and debilitates. When a major disease hits you, there are no words to describe that terror and loneliness. I have autoimmune problems, and without good medical insurance through work and supportive company, i'd probably be dead.

[goclark]

25. K and R

Thank you for sharing.

My heart goes out to you and I will keep you in my prayers.

[thinklikeme]

26. stay courageous

my mother died of a heart attack one week after finding out she had gone into remission from stomach cancer and i lost my aunt to leukemia a year later and it still hurts sometime so to know that my pain or anyone elses is the root to bastards like them pisses me off.

You are doing a very courageous thing. You are helping someone right now and may not know it. I hope the best for you and your family. It shows the compassion you have that during your trying moments you can still think of someone else. keep your head up and your family close

[SnowCritter]

27. I kinda know what you're going through

I'm a cancer survivor (kidney) and the waiting is terrifying.

I've also lost my father (pancreatic), an aunt (leukemia), and a couple of uncles (colon).

I'll keep you in my prayers.

[Coyote_Bandit]

28. .

We don't have any history of cancer in my family. At least we didn't until just a few weeks ago when Mom was diagnosed with stage 4 mantle cell lymphoma. She had no symptoms until she went to see her doctor for fatigue. She's going through chemo now - and we are still waiting. Waiting to see if she goes into remission and, if so, how long that remission might last before a recurrence. Fortunately, Mom qualifies for Medicare and has found a good clinic that will accept Medicare assignment as full compensation for their services.

If I faced the same diagnosis I'd be liquidating everything I own, making final arrangements and looking for someplace abroad to seek treatment as I likely would be unable to secure treatment here. Unfortunately, there are others here who lack even that option.

Sending good warm thoughts your way and hoping for the best for you.

[DFW]

29. It's all through my family as well: just a question of "when" for me, not "if."

My father died of pancreatic cancer, too. My mom had breast cancer, and ALL of their siblings either
have it or already died of it. My wife's brother died of it in his early fifties.

It is NOT trivial.

[barbtries]

31. i hope the news is good for you.

cancer will probably touch all of us eventually. i know it has in my family.

[WinstonSmith4740]

32. We have your back.

My heart is breaking reading your post. I lost my beloved husband 2 years ago to an extremely rare form of inherited cancer caused by a mutated gene. It was not going to be beaten, but we tried. Thank *your choice of deity here* for Medicare, as I'm sure no for profit insurance company would have touched him.

You were just on Stephanie Miller, weren't you? I know the waiting is the hardest part, but let me pass on what my husband's oncologist told us. I had asked her what made her go into cancer treatment. Her answer basically boiled down to the fact the cancer research and treatment is progressing at a breath-taking pace. We learn more literally every day. What was not available even two years ago, is probably here today. There is hope. Don't get caught up in survival rate statistics. Even if a person has a form of cancer that only has a 5% survival rate, if you're part of that 5%, your survival rate is 100%, and that's all that matters.

Keep the faith...positive thinking goes a long way. Keep a positive attitude, and keep laughing, although I know how hard that can be sometimes.

DUer's will be with you ever step of the way. Lean on us. Please email me here at DU...I'll send you my phone number if you ever want to talk.

[druidqueen]

33. Insurance companies are worse than the cancer

My husband, in January, 1995 was diagnosed with lung cancer. On the day he told his boss he would need some time off, he was laid off. However, we were able to use COBRA to keep his coverage. We were told by the doctor that he would most likely be in the hospital for 5 - 7 days. He wound up in the cardio-thoracic intensive care unit for 3 weeks!!! The bill was more than 6 figures. His health insurance first stated that they would only pay for 7 days (even though they were notified he would be in the ICU longer). After much negotiation with the hospital & the insurance company, we were left with a bill for $60,000!! We then became one of the many statistics you hear about.....we were forced to file bankruptcy after dealing with the horrors of cancer.

Then in December , 2002 my husband was once again diagnosed with lung cancer, only now it was in his left lung & a different strain of cancer. However, this time, since he had been on SS disability (after a long battle with the SS dept), he was covered by Medicare & his Medicare supplemental policy.......We owed the very same hospital $0. My husband, now, by some miracle is still alive and doing as well as one can with a total of less than 30% of his lungs.

The last thing anyone needs to worry about when they need healthcare is how much will it cost & how am I going to pay for it.

At the very least we need Medicare for all. One's access to healthcare should & must NOT be dependent on one's employer.

My heart goes out to Mr. Soptic.

[Skittles]

37. GO AWAY

you buy GOP crap hook line and sinker but DO NOT PEDDLE YOUR BULLSHIT HERE

[madrchsod]

41. dam skittles you made it disappear...

[penndragon69]

38. K&R from another Cancer survivor !!

[tavalon]

40. Because of various issues,

I've been mostly absent from political discussion, so I don't know who the man is that everyone is talking about. That said, I agree, people who are dealing with cancer are never fair game.

Part of my absence of recent has been because of a cancer scare by my husband. Thank goodness it turned out to be a scare, but I know that exact feeling you're talking about.

I hope with all my heart that the news you are waiting for ends up being good.

[Robyn66]

42. K&R from a Breast Cancer Survivor

I lost my mother to Lung cancer when she was 51. During her illness I spent many many hours on the phone fighting with insurance companies to get them to cover the hospitals and treatments she needed. I lost my Mother in law to breast cancer two years ago and I had breast cancer at the same time she did, only I was lucky enough to have and "better" kind of cancer and (we think )better care.

We live in a world where it seems compassion and caring for your fellow man are now unrealistic expectations.

Take care of yourself, get rest, eat healthy I wish you all the best.

[flakey_foont]

43. Thank you for posting this

[noiretextatique]

45. only heartless assholes make fun of poor, sick, struggling, deperate people

i know your fear...i've lived it. breast cancer survivor...in remission 5 years now. thank you so much for your post.
i have some unsolicited advice for you from a hard-learned lesson. take it one moment at a time, and do let your mind get ahead of you. i know that is easier said than done, but doing the "what if" thing will make you crazy. it is impossible to not think about it, but if you can focus on "what is" instead of "what if"...it might help.

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

46. I just returned from the hospital where my wife had the chemo port removed.

It's been just over 6 months since they discovered the sarcoma in her knee. 3 surgeries and knee replacement with heavy duty chemo. Her chances of survival are now 50/50.

It is no joke.

Fortunately, we do have good insurance or we'd camping under a bridge.

[Bobbie Jo]

48. Thank you for this...

My mother has stage IV breast cancer, and is now on her 14th different chemo over the past 2 years. Her cancer had become resistant according to her doctors, but she battles on...

You words touched my heart, I'm glad you found the strength to share them here. I hear you loud and clear.

Stay strong and hold tight.

[McCamy Taylor]

49. Some folks think the worse others do, the better they do.

[pmdsyr32]

50. Cancer

Bull shit is your reply. I lost my father to cancer stage 4 lung and it has nothing to do with bing upset with negative ads. Thats politics get used to it. Yes I cry a lot still for my dad. It's been four years but I don't use it for an excuse. Grow up

[Quantess]

51. I'm sorry to hear you lost your dad.

My father's death wasn't political either. Most deaths are not political.
Just something that happens to us sooner or later. Sooner, without health care.

[slipslidingaway]

52. Wishing you well, my husband had a bone marrow transplant for acute leukemia ...

almost two years ago and it certainly is not a joke! That being said everyone should have an equal opportunity for the best treatment according to the severity of their illness, not their financial status or HC plan, and HC should not be linked to employment IMHO.

I'm so very sorry that we were not allowed to have a real discussion of a national, not for profit HC system during the HC debate.

If you need some support resources feel free to send me a message.

Best wishes