The Real Welfare Queen

[Wait Wut]

A woman walked in today to make copies. She was wearing some God awful perfume, which was annoying enough. But, then she kept talking, and talking, and talking.

We have an American flag in our front lobby. “Oooh. What a nice flag” she says as she’s friggin’ stroking it...wtf? “I wish everyone had a flag. We just don’t have any real patriotism in this country, anymore.” Uhhhhh...sure.

Another customer walks in. A very nice man that I’ve worked with several times. He’s the owner of a maid service (franchise). She was busy trying to sift through her shit, so I excused myself to see what he needed. When she heard that he owned a maid service, “Oh! You’re the owner? I’ve been using the same maid service for years. I’ve heard you’re really expensive.”

This poor guy just wanted to have some stuff printed. He did not need a confrontation at his local print shop. He politely explained that the prices per hour were higher, but that they send out two people instead of the typical one so it ended up normally less expensive. She then started spouting off ridiculous claims about her current service and he was gently trying to call her bluff. She was crazy and kept inflating her previous claims. I kept interrupting her by asking him questions, but she kept blabbering away.

Finally, I was back to her. She was having copies of her financial material and bills done so she could collect welfare. Wait...it gets better. She started complaining about how difficult it is to get welfare these days because, “it’s all going to people who are too lazy to work.” /sigh “I have to get welfare because my husband doesn’t have to pay alimony anymore.” Holy shit. I’d place her age at mid-50s. She was driving a newer car. Couldn’t see clearly enough, but it looked like a mid-sized Honda. I’d guess just a year or two old.

“Do you know what’s even more upsetting? They didn’t even ask for my birth certificate! Anyone can walk in there and get welfare, even illegals!!” I had to ask... “Did they ask for a copy of your driver’s license or other I.D.?” Well, of course. “And, your SS card?” “Yes, but, anyone can get a driver’s license and social security card.” I walked away.

I finished her crap and went back to my office, but she kept talking. I don’t hear very well, so every time she’d open her trap I’d have to get up and walk to the front desk to see if she needed something. Well, the last straw was, “I can’t wait until that lousy Obama is kicked out of office. I’m sick of him bowing down to all the minorities and illegals in this country and not giving a shit about people like me.”

Fuck you, lady. You drive a new car, you have a cleaning service, you look pretty damned healthy and well-fed, you had decent clothes on, you’re whining because your alimony ran out. And, you’re applying for welfare. Guess what? I wouldn’t blame our President for not giving a shit about you. I know I don’t.

Right after she left, the woman that is in love with the font Comic Sans came in. I need a drink.

[barbtries]

1. she apparently never considered getting a job.

ha, she's in for a rude awakening. it might be another month or so, but she's going to be looking for a job or finding herself in a world of hurt.
she sounds really, really stupid. did she appear really, really stupid?

[Wait Wut]

3. Not so much stupid...

...but, there was definitely some crazy in there. She seemed like the typical life-long housewife that was never allowed to see the finances or pay the bills. Sheltered and completely naive, more than stupid.

[barbtries]

7. okay.

well from contempt to pity i go. i wouldn't want to be her.

[onehandle]

2. After decades of working with typography, I have concluded that Comic Sans is the perfect font...

...to make you look like an asshat.

[Wait Wut]

6. LOL!!!!

I tried telling her that. Well...I didn't use the word "asshat". Maybe that would have finally gotten the point across!

Yeah, I've been a graphic artist for 30 years, but she has MSWord and knows more than me. I love that.

[hootinholler]

13. A question from one who isn't a graphic artist...

For informal pieces, why?

I can see why it may be a poor choice for serious topics, but as an accent font or in a newsletter?

[Wait Wut]

16. #1 It's difficult to read.

Many people who create their own flyers/newsletters, etc. at home think because it's a fat font, that means it's more legible. Because that person has typed it themselves, they don't need to "read" it and just see big and bold. They don't see the mess that it truly is.

#2 It isn't as much "comic" as it is "childish scrawl". There are plenty of good "comic" fonts that you can download for free. A site that I've been using forever is: http://www.1001freefonts.com/ They provide both Mac and PC versions. There's even a section labeled "Comic" that will provide better solutions, if that's the direction you're going. Just don't go crazy with the fonts. Two or three fonts is all you really need. Using different versions of the same font will get you more attention and it will eliminate that frantic, scattered look that can give readers a negative feeling.

#3 Because I've been doing this for so damned long, I've developed the ability to "block out" text and see it as a graphic element instead of words. Comic Sans gives a piece the illusion of being messy. Go cleaner, more visually appealing and people will not only be able to read what you've typed, but subconsciously they'll be more receptive to what you're saying/selling.

Remember, just because MS is giving it away for free doesn't mean you should embrace it.

Edit to add a disclaimer: These days, some forms of "messy" are good, but only because they provide a more artistic look. A lot of the "grunge" fonts are fun to use. Just remember, those can be really, really hard to read and seem to super-annoy old folks.

[hootinholler]

22. As an old school programmer...

Let me assure you I have embraced very little from Mr. Gates' company. They have had so few positive impacts on the industry I'm hard pressed to name one.

I'm more a Times-Roman kinda guy, but my writing is generally more technical in nature, often coming across as a wall of text even though I do try hard to limit each paragraph to one idea.

Thanks for the response, I'm well aware that visual balance makes a difference.

[Norrin Radd]

26. Georgia isn't too bad.

[maggiesfarmer]

28. I'm a Software Engineer and love Microsoft bashing as much as the next guy, but

Visual Studio is the premier IDE, hands-down.

[GoneOffShore]

31. Over on Science Blogs, P.Z. Meyers uses Comic Sans to good effect.

Any comments posted to him from Creationists, Talibornagains, Xiantian apologists and general fuckwits get posted in Comic Sans.

[Wait Wut]

33. AAAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

That's perfect! I'll have to remember that whenever I quote some idiot! Maybe I'll even put the post in that light green that no one can read. Just to give it that full "OMG! This is SOOOOOO important I don't want you to be able to read it!" effect!

[justiceischeap]

18. Papyrus is almost as bad

Any time I see a (self-published) novel about Amazons or ancient Egypt, it usually uses papyrus. I immediately turn the other way on principle.

[Wait Wut]

21. Yeah. I've had to talk some people out of that one, as well.

Any time a font becomes popular, it's friggin' everywhere. Papyrus and Present. Bastard children of the same generation.

And, because I live in Arizona's "wild west capitol"...any damned "western" font.

[Norrin Radd]

25. I think the typographer who created Comic Sans, Vincent Connare, is unfairly maligned, though:

http://www.connare.com/whycomic.htm

The ire directed toward him and his creation puts me on the side of Comic Sans, no matter how hideous it is. I would never use it, though. I've bought real comic fonts from Comicraft, or have made my own.

[Wait Wut]

29. I would never attack the artist.

Comic Sans has always been a bad font, but, it was an artist's concept. If it was in a frame and hanging in the Museum of Modern Art, I could just walk past it. But, I have to see it, and try to convince people not to use it, every single day.

[treestar]

4. Conservatives consider themselves exceptions

If they need to collect unemployment or welfare, it is completely justified.

Reminds me of working on auto accident cases - soft tissue injuries, the cervical sprain. It really happened to people. But everyone else's cases were frauds that were making insurance premiums higher.

[Wait Wut]

11. That's their "entitlement mentality"

To be fair, I have two close friends here that are both Conservatives. They were all over the "Obama is a Socialist" meme during the last election. Both lost their jobs shortly after and had to get public assistance. It damn near killed them. But, they've changed their tunes quite a bit. They see "the other side" more clearly, now. It helps that they're both in their early 30s. I think the older a Con is, the harder it is for them to see their hypocrisy.

[arbusto_baboso]

5. The only reason they MIGHT not have asked for her birth cert was if it's ALREADY on file.

Otherwise, it is a REQUIREMENT for cash assistance. So is having minor children in the home.

But in any case, that fact alone, along with all the rest of her statements, means she has been "in the system" before.

'Nuff said.

[Wait Wut]

9. It's possible...

...but, she seemed really unaware of the process. Or, she's lying. After hearing the b.s. she was spouting about her cleaning service, I'm going with the latter.

[arbusto_baboso]

10. Yeah, she seems a liar.

[haele]

27. Not necissarily - if she was in the system twenty years or thirty years ago, things have changed -

And pretty drastically. I have a feeling that a 50 year old who's husband doesn't have to pay alimony any more won't be able to get much assistance at all - except for maybe job search assistance. If she does manage to get welfare, she'll find the hundred and change a month that most states give out as short-term/emergancy welfare gives out won't cover gas in the tank for a month. She's not going to qualify for long-term welfare. She might get food stamps. And have to wait 45 days or so to qualify for whatever indigent health care might be available for her.
Even if there were kids involved (and it sounds like there aren't any school-aged kids left for her to care for, or she'd still be getting alimony), she'd be lucky to see anything close to $1K cash or vouchers a month - and that would be in the more generous states. She's going to have to start selling things and start working until she's old enough for SSI.

As a side, The kidlet's baby-daddy's mother thought it would be perfectly all right for the kidlet to go on assistance because he doesn't have steady work and is pretty much unemployable in this economy (under 20, high school grad = armwrestle with un-employed IT workers for the few job openings at Micky D's or the Dollar Store). Back when "gramma" was a teenaged single mother, it was apparently pretty quick and easy - even if she was living at home with her parents. And the state didn't much care where the father was back then, either. It's soooo different now.

Haele

[liberal N proud]

8. Sounds like fraud

She can afford a maid service but is collecting welfare?

[Wait Wut]

12. That's the first thing that really set me off.

Then she had to keep talking. The more I had to listen to her, the more I wanted to start screaming. I've heard all the stories about people with Caddies, etc. getting food from food banks. I have a couple of friends that volunteer at one of our locals and they're pretty jaded as far as that goes. One was "fired" for getting into an argument with an "obviously not starving couple in a new car" that started picking on a Hispanic family at the food bank for "being illegal". She was devastated. No, they don't check residency at the food banks. She said it was a very pleasant Hispanic couple with 3 small children. The kids were hungry, she could tell that much. She's at a different charity, now.

I know there are people out there that have nice clothes, new cars, etc. that have fallen on some really hard times. But, I doubt they have a cleaning service.

[arbusto_baboso]

17. There are usually anonymous tip lines to report suspected fraud.

You might want to find out the one for your area, if you know this woman's name.

[Wait Wut]

19. Shit. I got her first name...but, not her last.

Besides, there really is no telling whether she's really in need of assistance. She could've been lying about the cleaning service just to annoy the guy. There are a lot of people out there that seem to be well off, but aren't. She should probably sell the car, though. Especially if she's not working. Get something used and functional and get rid of the big sedan.

I'm going to have to give the people at the welfare office some credit for catching her, if she's really committing fraud. She has a big mouth and I'm sure would spill something "useful" during a random interview. "What's your middle initial?" "Well, I was named after my mother, but my middle name was my father's mother. She was a great lady, but she only left me half of her $2 billion fortune. It's so hard to pay the cleaning lady with $100 bills."

[arbusto_baboso]

20. Oh, yeah, if it's fraud, she'll be caught. Eventually.

Just thought you could get the ball rolling sooner.

I take a personal interest in stuff like that, being a welfare worker.

[Wait Wut]

23. Wow. I don't envy you.

That's gotta be a tough, depressing job. I would imagine you spend a lot of time playing psychologist, as well. Especially when you get the ones that have fallen far, hard and fast.

Anyway...she said she'd be back, so I'll try to catch her last name when she comes in.

[arbusto_baboso]

24. The worse the economy gets, the busier I get.

Sometimes, it's like being a doctor. Getting too emotionally involved would wreck me and make me useless to my clients.

Half my coworkers are on anti-depressants, and I drink a lot of beer.

[Warpy]

14. She's going to be in for a shock

but she might qualify for temporary assistance. It's all her fault, of course, for squandering her alimony on maid service and things like that instead of socking it away, but some people are simply born feeling entitled and it's really tough to get through to them that they're not.

She is going to be under heavy pressure to get a job and it's not going to be a job she likes because there are damned few of them out there for 50 something women, even if those women have long years of experience in their fields. As an unskilled kept woman, she's going to have to look at retail or restaurants or the lowest rung of office work unless she manages to luck into some sort of sales job from a friend of a friend of a friend.

The biggest shock of all is going to find out that welfare and those food stamps she thought were supporting "lazy" people in lavish lifestyles will be less than she paid the maid.

It's going to be a really steep learning curve and I'd have a great deal of fun watching her--from a distance, heavy perfume bugs the hell out of me too.

[noiretextatique]

15. her sense of entitlement is insane

sounds like she hasn't worked a single day in her life, yet she assumes she is more worthy than someone who actually works and pays taxes...but has skin darker than hers. this is the mindset of many GOP voters: i am deserving, but other people, especially black and brown ones, are not.

[AverageJoe90]

30. As someone who may legitimately need welfare.......

...this makes me pretty mad. She oughta get off her ass and leave the welfare to those who need it.

[JNelson6563]

32. I'll bet she's lying

I'll bet she doesn't employ a maid service and just likes to try to be important and relevant.

Julie

[Wait Wut]

34. I'm leaning towards that conclusion, as well.

One part of the story I left out. After my other, polite, patient, friendly customer left, I apologized to her for making her wait. Her response, "That's okay. He's a big honcho and I'm nobody".

I suck at customer service. I'm much better off being left alone in my office to make crap look like artsyish kind of stuff. So, I didn't bother to disagree with her.