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Zorro

(15,740 posts)
Thu Apr 23, 2020, 10:05 AM Apr 2020

Texas's Lieutenant Governor Says Dying Not as Bad as Living in State Where He Is Lieutenant Governor

AUSTIN (The Borowitz Report)—Urging Texans to “keep things in perspective,” Texas’s lieutenant governor, Dan Patrick, said on Wednesday that dying is “surely not as bad” as living in a state where he is lieutenant governor.

Patrick, whose vehement anti-living message has stirred controversy across the country, said that he was speaking out to remind Texans that there are “some things worse than dying.”

“It’s time for a reality check, folks,” Patrick said. “If you wake up every morning and remember that I am the second-highest-ranking elected official in your state, maybe dying doesn’t look so bad, after all.”

Arguing that “dying has got a bad rap,” he blasted the media for what he called its “flagrant anti-death bias.”

“All these media people who go on about how dying is the worst thing in the world have never spent any time with me,” he said.

https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/texass-lieutenant-governor-says-dying-not-as-bad-as-living-in-state-where-he-is-lieutenant-governor

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Texas's Lieutenant Governor Says Dying Not as Bad as Living in State Where He Is Lieutenant Governor (Original Post) Zorro Apr 2020 OP
You first fucker. Go suck start a shotgun. Show your peps what... Hotler Apr 2020 #1
I know this is Borowitz - and its supposed to be satire, but its not far off from what he said tulipsandroses Apr 2020 #2
I know it is satire, but it is also true. Jamastiene Apr 2020 #3
I disagree. DEbluedude Apr 2020 #4
I love good satire Gothmog Apr 2020 #5

tulipsandroses

(5,124 posts)
2. I know this is Borowitz - and its supposed to be satire, but its not far off from what he said
Thu Apr 23, 2020, 10:24 AM
Apr 2020

Just pathetic.

Jamastiene

(38,187 posts)
3. I know it is satire, but it is also true.
Thu Apr 23, 2020, 10:26 AM
Apr 2020

Being under Republican rule is pure torture. Every day, you wake up and wish it would just end, anyhow, anyway, anytime.

It is even worse when it is an extremist Christian Identity Republican and you are surrounded by their overly domineering, out of control followers. They threaten you with hell, then tell you they won't be there in hell with you for eternity. That's not much of a threat. Once you realize this hell place will not contain them, heaven and hell become reversed. How can a place they go be called heaven? Not for long, not once they get there and fuck it all up. How can hell be the bad place if it means you can spend eternity away from their stupid asses? That would be the one good thing that could ever happen. Eternity away from them.

That is how it is in my area. It's a bunch of extremist right wing Christians who stop you to preach at you when you are on the way into the grocery store or the bank. They preach in the streets everywhere you try to go. They are out of control and constantly trying to force you into their religion. It just makes me less likely to ever follow that religion. I don't want to spend eternity with such horrible, rude people.

If you are unlucky enough to end up in the hospital or hospice, they circle like sharks in the water to force you to listen to more of their preaching. They just hang out in your room with you against your consent because staff will not make them leave. That is what they did to my aunt and she already WAS a Christian. She just wasn't an obnoxious right wing domineering Christian that believed in shoving religion down people's throats. They even did that shit to her. You cannot get staff or anyone to get these people out of the room. They force it on you. You have to endure it whether you like it or not. My aunt suffered through the ones staying in her room at Hospice in our home county. They were constantly in her room all the time. As she lay dying, a preacher was in her face, leaning over her bed yelling the question, "Do you believe in God?" She could no longer speak by then. That was in the VA in Fayetteville. She had been moved there by then. So, even there, it was that bad. She had to die with that shit going on. I just hope I can die at home away from those assholes. Because of crushing poverty, it might be the only way I ever get away from them.

Republicans can make you look at hell as an inviting place. Any way to get away from them. That piece might be satire, but it is also true. That is what it feels like under Republican rule, especially if they get on you with their religion obsession.

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