by photo or actual presence, it's quite possible we were victimized because of our residence's zip code???
I do recall that many years ago, members of the church we attended regularly south of town all begged off an annual planned holiday activity we had offered to host at our home north of town, racially polarized by those points of the compass. One of the members actually did mention. with a chuckle, that they were afraid their cars would be vandalized or worse, surprisingly not an expectation of the possibility that bad weather might make driving back home late at night difficult in winter or excusing themselves with any illnesses. Hmmmm....
The church I was raised in withered and died as older members passed, but the congregation never extended a friendly welcome to strangers in a neighborhood of changing demographics. I've had lots of untrue social hassles and shade thrown my way by my parents and sister over the years; she married a black man, a great guy with a family we both liked immensely - go figure! My daughter is married to a college-educated Latino whose parents were Nicaraguan immigrants to the West Coast. Both men were Catholic - so religious bigots as well, then? I've had to do a lot of work to evolve from privileged white elite RW Christian fundamentalist German Lutheran roots - maybe more so from that part of embedded privilege, I suppose.
I do remember having Little Black Sambo Viewmaster reels and playing an on-the-road game called BFCD (black folks can't drive) - I won't discuss the rules of play here! It's embarrassing to have had one's FIL call attention at a high school band activity where lots of POC parents we knew were present saying too loudly that a little pickaninny toddler was cute with a pointed finger - to be fair, he was very deaf and refused to wear his hearing aid and had no way to judge the volume of his own voice -- still, all these things I came to know as evidence of that embedded racism. Our home was a frequent place for all my kids' friends. LOL - maybe because we provided the pizza and safe listening ears when they wanted to "talk" to us about their sometimes quite personal problems at home and school, or just with each other.
Ashamed of such, I've grown and matured and spoken up when required. Thank goodness for education and experiences in integrated community living. I no longer go to any sect of organized church; can't deal with the group-think of all sorts of prejudice , i.e., you can't love who you love or be who you are cuz it's a sin"- now it's personal and spiritual--open to acceptance of any faith and orientation except those that walk those bad paths that limit the experience of community peace and love.
Though officially illegal, a realtor thought it relevant enough, off the record, to give an unsolicited warning of future home value, crime stats, etc...of a home we had chosen to consider at a lower price point than those south of town where we had rented an apartment sight unseen because we moved for a job offer after a year of unemployment in a 30 day sprint to DH's start date just before the Christmas holidays. We received many "white flight" and "disloyal to family, friends and God" comments about our choice to pull up stakes.
My DH has endured unemployment where its quite possible zip codes of our past/present residences on background checks may have triggered a negative response when applying for an opportunity - never proved that, but...can't believe how long his unemployment lasted in a purported "thriving" IT field at the time before all those crises. For a fact, upon one Charles Manson meet and greet, the interviewer remarked that they were "surprised" he was not Asian? Can't for the life of me think where that type of comment could begin...although his initials begin with a letter many Asians have trouble pronouncing. Perhaps they made fun of it prior to the meeting.
What's hardest for me is having American employers say we're were not smart enough and too costly to be employed while corporations loaded their offices with H1B's from foreign nations, merely trained to the test, and by Americans no less, so to speak, but little else about American norms. I remember telling one accustomed to servants at home in the Philippines that she needed to pick up her own mess in the lunchroom. I remember acting as this colleague's private immigration secretary, explaining by letter that she had nursing skills my boss could not find Americans to do the work that she did anywhere else in America, really? - I told her how hard that was while my DH, an educated American, remained unemployed; she didn't like it much but there it was! I fulfilled my "all other job duties as assigned." - I can only say that I'm working on that issue of right and privilege in America for the sole reason that I'm a citizen who does recognize that privilege of birth.
Immigration policies sure need revamped - more compassion and a low-cost time-limited path to citizenship or else go home to help your own country; essential thorough and fair vetting to replace the horrible way we've treated migrant workers and asylum seekers at our southern border. No one believes our streets are paved with gold anymore, but it should not be that seekers of better lives are not provided a generous opportunity to become a citizen, to work as hard for their employers, and to receive essential basic medical care, good equal educations, and the chance of work that meets the cost of those aspects of American life to follow as citizens. A chance at that which our Constitution promised instead of one marked by splitting families up by caging and losing their unrecorded children so they cannot find them ever again. I just don't have enough words to enumerate the injustices of TPTB of this administration as it refused to deal with it as well as even more important issues facing us. SHAME!
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