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abakan

(1,819 posts)
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 05:03 PM Dec 2020

I'm sorry I have not been doing my job as a MIR member

I've been wondering how to really do it and as soon as I get past the death of my dad.
He died yesterday at 90 years old of lung cancer. I'll get to it, soon, please be patient .
thank you

40 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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I'm sorry I have not been doing my job as a MIR member (Original Post) abakan Dec 2020 OP
Be strong, take your time... Wounded Bear Dec 2020 #1
I am so sorry for your loss. joshcryer Dec 2020 #2
So sorry for your loss. mn9driver Dec 2020 #3
Take as much time as you need. That is big. You are not expected applegrove Dec 2020 #4
... Nevilledog Dec 2020 #5
Here's a link that only MIR Team member can read that will get you going in the right direction Brother Buzz Dec 2020 #6
Thank you for the links abakan Dec 2020 #7
Bookmark it. Brother Buzz Dec 2020 #11
We grieve with you BumRushDaShow Dec 2020 #34
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Take care of yourself first. Marie Marie Dec 2020 #8
I'm so sorry for your loss. MontanaMama Dec 2020 #9
I'm so sorry to hear about your Father. Take care of yourself as your priority right now. hlthe2b Dec 2020 #10
I am so sorry for your great loss.🕯️May his Memory be a Blessing irisblue Dec 2020 #12
This message was self-deleted by its author Chin music Dec 2020 #13
So sorry for your loss. Take time, never worry about that minor stuff in life. Miigwech Dec 2020 #14
So sorry for your dad. I've lost both my parents. MoonRiver Dec 2020 #15
Take Care, Abakan ProfessorGAC Dec 2020 #16
Deepest Condolences SheltieLover Dec 2020 #17
I am very sorry for your loss, abakan. brer cat Dec 2020 #18
I'm so sorry for your loss. LiberalLoner Dec 2020 #19
My sympathies to you and your family... Spazito Dec 2020 #20
Take a break malaise Dec 2020 #21
I am so sorry for your loss. Dem2theMax Dec 2020 #22
MIR can be as busy as you like, and for some life happens instead. Hortensis Dec 2020 #23
... alwaysinasnit Dec 2020 #24
Sorry for your loss. barbtries Dec 2020 #25
Don't stress it Soph0571 Dec 2020 #26
.. greatauntoftriplets Dec 2020 #27
So very sorry for your terrible loss. Sending vibes for healing and peace. Please take care of niyad Dec 2020 #28
I'm also sorry for your loss Jay25 Dec 2020 #29
Deepest condolences. sinkingfeeling Dec 2020 #30
I'm so very sorry for your loss, abakan. NoRoadUntravelled Dec 2020 #31
So sorry for you loss Cadfael Dec 2020 #32
I'm so sorry... do what you need to do. CaptainTruth Dec 2020 #33
Hopefully, your Dad will get to meet the Notorious RBG... AmyStrange Dec 2020 #35
I am so sorry for your loss DonaldsRump Dec 2020 #36
Peace and a prayer for so fort and solace mahina Dec 2020 #37
So sorry for your loss... electric_blue68 Dec 2020 #38
I am so terribly sorry to hear that! Rhiannon12866 Dec 2020 #39
I'm sorry for your loss. cate94 Dec 2020 #40

applegrove

(118,696 posts)
4. Take as much time as you need. That is big. You are not expected
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 05:08 PM
Dec 2020

to go back to routine tasks anytime soon. Reach out and remember. Cry. Dad's are the greatest. ((((Hugs))))

Brother Buzz

(36,444 posts)
6. Here's a link that only MIR Team member can read that will get you going in the right direction
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 05:13 PM
Dec 2020
https://www.democraticunderground.com/1244306175

Repost your OP in the MIRT forum and you'll find everyone will be willing to walk you through the process and get you oriented.

Sorry for your loss.

Brother Buzz

(36,444 posts)
11. Bookmark it.
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 05:27 PM
Dec 2020

Believe me, you'll go back to it again, again, and again. And speaking of again, there are a ton of extraordinary people in the MIR Team forum that will help you.

MIRT's motto, "The only dumb question is the one that isn't asked".

BumRushDaShow

(129,115 posts)
34. We grieve with you
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 09:06 PM
Dec 2020

and as soon as you are ready, do come in and "sit for awhile".

Sending my deepest condolences to you.

MontanaMama

(23,322 posts)
9. I'm so sorry for your loss.
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 05:26 PM
Dec 2020

You cannot be expected to be over the passing of your beloved dad in one day...one week or whatever. He's your dad. Take the time to mourn.

Response to abakan (Original post)

 

Miigwech

(3,741 posts)
14. So sorry for your loss. Take time, never worry about that minor stuff in life.
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 05:32 PM
Dec 2020

May all his memories be a blessing.

MoonRiver

(36,926 posts)
15. So sorry for your dad. I've lost both my parents.
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 05:35 PM
Dec 2020

I also felt inadequate on MIR team. Some said I shouldn't quit, but I did. You definitely should stay. They are a very understanding group.

SheltieLover

(57,073 posts)
17. Deepest Condolences
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 05:49 PM
Dec 2020

So sorry for your loss.

Please remember to engage in quality self-care. Make sure you eat, sleep, and do a lot of deep breathng to stay grounded and centered.

Please also consider contacting his hospice organization, or one in your area for bereavement therapy. Most will provide 13 months to support you through the "year of firsts," birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, etc.

And know that the stages of grief are not linear; there is no timeline for resolving grief.

Hugs

brer cat

(24,578 posts)
18. I am very sorry for your loss, abakan.
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 05:57 PM
Dec 2020

Take care of your self first. MIRT will be here when you are ready to return.

Spazito

(50,370 posts)
20. My sympathies to you and your family...
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 06:10 PM
Dec 2020

Don't worry about MIRT, it will be there when you feel you can participate.

Dem2theMax

(9,651 posts)
22. I am so sorry for your loss.
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 06:28 PM
Dec 2020

We will share a date together. My dad died on December 14th, eight years ago.

Don't worry about us. You take care of you.
We are all here to support you.

Hortensis

(58,785 posts)
23. MIR can be as busy as you like, and for some life happens instead.
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 06:35 PM
Dec 2020

People here don't know what MIRT is doing.

When you're ready to get active on that private forum, you'll find there are instructions for how to do the job. It's a forum like these where people discuss their thoughts on cases and guidelines and you can read old threads and ask questions.

Take care of yourself right now, though.

Soph0571

(9,685 posts)
26. Don't stress it
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 07:00 PM
Dec 2020

When you are ready we will talk you through how to get be a marvellous member of the team, and in the meantime my deepest condolences at your loss.

niyad

(113,348 posts)
28. So very sorry for your terrible loss. Sending vibes for healing and peace. Please take care of
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 07:04 PM
Dec 2020

yourself, and remember that your DU family is here for you.

NoRoadUntravelled

(2,626 posts)
31. I'm so very sorry for your loss, abakan.
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 08:01 PM
Dec 2020

Please give yourself the time you need as you adjust to a new way of being in the world. It's so very hard to lose a loved one. You are in my thoughts.

 

AmyStrange

(7,989 posts)
35. Hopefully, your Dad will get to meet the Notorious RBG...
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 09:23 PM
Dec 2020

-

I'm not in any hurry myself, but that's gonna be one of the first things that I do.
===========

DonaldsRump

(7,715 posts)
36. I am so sorry for your loss
Tue Dec 15, 2020, 11:32 PM
Dec 2020

Losing a parent at any age is awful. It's the end of an era, if nothing else. For most of us, it's even greater than that.

I just finished two consecutive terms on MIRT and met some incredibly fine people between April 2020-last week. It felt like a REAL team because it WAS a real team. No one minds how much you contribute, and especially under the circumstances, they will of course understand. Really great folks, I have to say, several of whom have posted on this thread!

Your obligation right now, if I can be so presumptuous, is to you and your family. There are plenty of fantastic MIRTers right now who will welcome you with open arms whenever you're ready.

electric_blue68

(14,912 posts)
38. So sorry for your loss...
Wed Dec 16, 2020, 06:16 AM
Dec 2020

it's usually hard stuff to go through losing a parent, lung cancer Imo one of the worst things to suffer from.

Mine are both gone a bit over, and under a decade.

You need to take care of the immediate things, and go through some grieving - at some point you'll get to your MIR work.

Look how many people here are giving you support. Strength to your and your family.

Rhiannon12866

(205,539 posts)
39. I am so terribly sorry to hear that!
Wed Dec 16, 2020, 06:31 AM
Dec 2020

Please do whatever you need to do and take your time. Everyone certainly understands. As we always say on MIRT, "real life comes first," and my heart goes out to you - I lost my own Dad between Thanksgiving and Christmas some time ago and know how devastating this can be. Come join us when you're ready and we'll welcome you then.

And here's the link to the MIRT Forum when you need it:
https://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=forum&id=1244

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