Wonkette: Good Lord, The One Million Moms Are Still So Mad At Cereal

[Nevilledog]

Link to tweet

https://www.wonkette.com/good-lord-the-one-million-moms-are-still-so-mad-at-cereal

On Thursday, I got an email from the One Million Moms, re: cereal. You see, Kellogg's made a special cereal for Pride Month in collaboration with GLAAD and t just ... it just breaks Monica Cole's wee little heart to see all of the cereal mascots gathering around a cereal bowl of sin, or whatever it is she thinks is happening here.

It is not the first email I have gotten from "them," re: cereal. In 2019, they were also upset at cereal for the same reason they are currently mad at cereal. In 2019, the company came out with "All Together" cereal, which consisted of "Raisin Bran, Corn Flakes, Rice Krispies, Frosted Flakes, Froot Loops and Frosted Mini Wheats" all mixed together, and they were very upset about that as well.

This time it is called "Together With Pride" and "features berry-flavored, rainbow hearts dusted with edible glitter," which sounds a lot more like a thing people would want to actually eat. I mean, the other idea was cute and all but edible glitter is obviously a better time than combining Raisin Bran and Froot Loops, which actually seems kind of terrible.

The One Million Moms Who Definitely Exist And Are Named George Glass are mad because they think Kellogg's is "targeting" their children and, I guess, trying to turn them gay and/or transgender with supportive mascots and glitter cereal — which their children, for the record, are in no way obligated to eat. It is unclear exactly how they imagine this would happen. Like they're gonna be walking through the grocery store with their kid and the kid sees the box, is entirely aware of the fact that it is LGBTQ+ pride themed glitter cereal and thinks to themselves "Whell! If Tony The Tiger and Toucan Sam say it is okay to be gay and/or trans, I'm gonna go be that.

*snip*

[jimfields33]

1. I thought they threw all the cereals together in the box. Lol

It looks like froot loop hearts and lucky charm marshmallows. I actually haven’t seen it in any grocery stores.

[Bev54]

2. "One Million Moms" what is there 20 of them?

[WhiteTara]

4. I thought it was one woman in her kitchen

pumping out massive bot messages so that we will think Wow! a million moms!

[Bev54]

5. Probably

[Wounded Bear]

3. Well the War on Christmas went down in flames...

so I guess they need something to get their panties in a twist about.

[harumph]

6. It's named "One Million Moms" only because

nobody would believe "One Bazillion Moms"

[ProfessorGAC]

7. Besides, All They Had To Do...

...was add 4 zeroes! I mean zero has no value, so why not toss an extra 4 in there? It's not inaccurate!

[TlalocW]

8. One Million Moms

Because, Moms Equating the Population of Biloxi, Mississippi and run by Men from the AFA, doesn't fit on the letterhead.

TlalocW

[Crunchy Frog]

9. They've been stealth targeting them for decades with Froot Loops.