General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsSad update on my 100 yr old dad, & my sister/his caretaker...
I posted here a couple weeks ago that my dad turned 100. He was able to have a pleasant celebration surrounded by family members, while he was still cognizant & in good humor. It was truly a blessing.
A lot can change in 2 weeks. Since then he's rapidly gone downhill, & last night my sister, who he has been living with for the past few months, & who has been his primary caretaker during that time, had a stroke & ended up in the ICU. Today dad was in such bad shape that my niece had to call an ambulance & have him taken to ER, & he will probably go to hospice/palliative care either later tonight or tomorrow. None of us expects him to live more than a few more days. Needless to say, I'm on a plane tomorrow, the cost be damned.
We are a strong family, we stick together, we help each other regardless of the cost, family is family, blood is thicker than water & all that. We will get through this... but... support from friends is always helpful & appreciated...
Skittles
(153,169 posts)we are here for you
calimary
(81,312 posts)Its been a tremendous help and a big dose of moral support - for me personally and for me to pass along to others here.
Someones always here.
You probably dont even know the extent of how helpful and comforting and reassuring just those three words are.
Id thank you for all of us but that seems a little presumptuous. But I can DEFINITELY thank you for me.
Skittles
(153,169 posts)SheltieLover
(57,073 posts)Healing vibes on the way to you, Dad, Sister & All. 💓💓💓
KT2000
(20,583 posts)and that makes it even harder. So glad you have a supportive family - it means everything. Peace to you all and best wishes for your sister.
leftieNanner
(15,121 posts)Losing family is tough.
I'm glad you have a strong family.
gademocrat7
(10,659 posts)Sending you supportive hugs.
Lonestarblue
(10,011 posts)I wish you peace in whatever decisions you need to make for your Dad. Also sending good vibes for your sisters recovery.
SheilaAnn
(9,708 posts)onecaliberal
(32,863 posts)Botany
(70,516 posts)Free advice and this got me through my late father's last few months and after he passed
make a list of what you think you need to do today, put one foot in from of the other foot,
and if you only get part of the list done so be it.
catbyte
(34,402 posts)BoomaofBandM
(1,771 posts)sheshe2
(83,789 posts)My sister and I have been primary caregivers to mom the past 3 and a half years. She will be 95 next month. It is not an easy task.
Best to you all.
malaise
(269,054 posts)Hortensis
(58,785 posts)Best wishes for your sister's recovery and that the last years and ends of all your lives are as good as your father's.
Family.
a kennedy
(29,672 posts)Positive vibes, prayers, much love and know were all here for you.
calimary
(81,312 posts)Just know that youre nowhere near alone as you work this part of The Journey.
MissMillie
(38,560 posts).
barbtries
(28,798 posts)especially the double whammy. safe travels
HipChick
(25,485 posts)blogslug
(38,002 posts)What you're going through is a lot. I hope you have people and services to lessen your burden. ❤️
Nevilledog
(51,121 posts)hlthe2b
(102,292 posts)calimary
(81,312 posts)Someones always here.
And so are many pairs of strong shoulders that you can lean on.
Niagara
(7,627 posts)Atticus
(15,124 posts)now about to die. And, it sounds to me like you are the worthy heir of that strength.
None of us is eager to accept the torch when it is passed, but that is often the last thing we can do for our dying loved one.
irisblue
(32,980 posts)essaynnc
(801 posts)Cracklin Charlie
(12,904 posts)It can happen that way sometimes.
Peace.
riversedge
(70,242 posts)samnsara
(17,622 posts)mgardener
(1,817 posts)We are always here.
Retired Engineer Bob
(759 posts)Ill keep you in my thoughts. Take comfort in the company of your family and the support you can offer each other. Heres hoping your travel is uneventful and you can all get together quickly.
Ill echo Botanys words regarding the folks who work in hospice care. We lost my dad and my grandmother in the last year and a half, both had hospice care. Not only did they provide comfort to their patients, they also helped the rest of the family as well.
Meowmee
(5,164 posts)Hugs to you and your family 💕
pazzyanne
(6,556 posts)Take care of you as well as your father and sister.
niyad
(113,336 posts)for all of you.
Your DU family is here for you,
Desert grandma
(804 posts)that all of your friends here at DU are sending their warmest thoughts and much love and positive energy to you and your loved ones. ((hugs))
we can do it
(12,189 posts)vercetti2021
(10,156 posts)I can't imagine
TheBlackAdder
(28,208 posts).
You sister should be commended for her dedication to your father, but it is such a stressful task.
Sending positive energy.
.
roamer65
(36,745 posts)Stressful is definitely an understatement.
Good luck to you, Captain!
hamsterjill
(15,222 posts)And when it rains, it tends to pour. I'm so sorry for this double whammy for you and your family.
Care taking is hard and takes a heavy toll. My best wishes for your sister and a full recovery.
As to your father, I believe in my own weird fashion that we have some degree (who knows how much, but some) degree of control when it's our time to leave. I'm sure he has sensed that it is his time soon and wants the attention to be put on the recovery of your sister.
All I can say is that I'm very sorry that this has happened, and that I'm sending prayers and a hug for you and your family.
zeusdogmom
(994 posts)Supportive, caring thoughts for you. And may your dad and sister have wise and caring medical staff.
smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)Sending you and your family warm thoughts and healing vibes to get through this together.
YDogg
(6,682 posts)All best wishes to you and your beloved family. ❤
MineralMan
(146,317 posts)MerryBlooms
(11,770 posts)Danmel
(4,915 posts)It just totally sucks, no matter how prepared you think you are, it is just so hard. Sending virtual hugs and wishing you and your family comfort and peace.
Generic Other
(28,979 posts)Loryn
(944 posts)Things do change quickly. I am so grateful for the hospice care my dad received. They were wonderful.
tiredtoo
(2,949 posts)Snackshack
(2,541 posts)Yes, family is what matters. I spent the last 15yr caring for my mother, father & grandmother. Its a tough position to be in. I hope the best for your Sister and Father and you. Hospice is a wonderful organization with a great support structure (at least in my case, couldnt have made it w/o them).
Best Wishes
🕯
orleans
(34,057 posts)with love
tblue37
(65,403 posts)GulfCoast66
(11,949 posts)Im thinking of you and your family.
Your strong family is the greatest testament to your father.
Peace.
raging moderate
(4,305 posts)Your Dad would want her to recover and thrive and live on, for him!
Hekate
(90,714 posts)electric_blue68
(14,906 posts)))) stregnth ((( to you.
))) peace ((( to your dad.
))) healing, and a full recovery ((( for your sister.
So sorry you are being buffeted by a double shock.
Response to CaptainTruth (Original post)
diehardblue This message was self-deleted by its author.
Fla Dem
(23,690 posts)I hope your sister fully recovers and your Dad passes peacefully. Stay well yourself.
marble falls
(57,102 posts)BobTheSubgenius
(11,564 posts)I am so sorry to hear your news. I wish that my 8 years of watching my father disintegrate in front of my eyes after a stroke gave me some useful insight or at least some comforting thoughts.
But all I can offer are condolences and a wish for your family getting through this as well as possible. I'm sorry.
MLAA
(17,298 posts)seta1950
(932 posts)We are thinking of you and your family
pandr32
(11,588 posts)...with all the changes and for the duration he has left.
It is wonderful you have a strong family to support each other.
We are here, too.
nitpicker
(7,153 posts)I hope (1) you can get there and (2) he can appreciate that.
SYFROYH
(34,172 posts)CTyankee
(63,912 posts)Mother, I'm here." Those were the last words she heard. She was 92 years old.
Politicub
(12,165 posts)like a strong and thoughtful person. That will help your family immeasurably.
FakeNoose
(32,645 posts)We're here when you need us, my friend!
IbogaProject
(2,816 posts)So sorry for the sudden decline of both your dad and sister. I'm wishing them both the best. Please try and visit or have staff setup facetime, contact with the outside will help them both.
waterwatcher123
(144 posts)nolabear
(41,986 posts)Sadly, we die. But not everyone has family that loves them out of this world. Im truly sorry for your dad and your sister. I hope they do know theyre loved. Sure sounds like it. ❤️