Police Officer Test

[Disaffected]

Police Officer Test

How do you tell the difference between an Australian Police Officer, a Canadian Police Officer, an American Police Officer and a Scottish officer? The answer is found below.

QUESTION: You’re a policeman, on duty by yourself. You are walking on a deserted street late at night.
Suddenly, an armed man with a huge knife comes around the
corner, locks eyes with you and screaming something that sounds like
obscenities, raises the knife and lunges at you.

You are carrying your full belt of force options and are an expert in using them.
However, you have only a split second to react before he reaches you. What do you do?

ANSWERS:

Canadian Police Officer:

Firstly he must consider the person's human rights:

1) Does the man look mentally unstable, poor and/or oppressed?

2) Is he newly arrived in this country and does not yet understand the
law?

3) Is this really a knife or a ceremonial dagger?

4) Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to
attack?

5) Am I dressed provocatively?

6) Could I run away?

7) Could I possibly swing my retractable asp baton and knock the knife out of his hand?

8) Should I try and negotiate with him to discuss his
wrong-doings?

9) Why am I carrying so many destructive use of force options anyway and what kind of message does this send to society?

10) Does he definitely want to kill me or would he be content just to wound me?

11) If I were to grab his knees and hold on, would he still want to stab and kill me?

12) If I raise my firearm and he turns and runs away, do I get blamed if he falls over, knocks his head, suffers an injury or even worse, dies?

13) If I hurt him and lose the subsequent court case, does he have the opportunity to sue me, cost me my job, my credibility and the loss of my family home?

Australian Police Officer:

BANG!

American Police Officer:

BANG ! BANG !
BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG !

'Click'...Reload...

BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG !

Glasgow Police Officer:

"Haw, Jimmie....! Drop the wee knife reet this minute noo, unless ye want it stuck up yer arse !”

[FoxNewsSucks]

1. While the question doesn't specify,

from the American response, clearly it's not a white guy with that knife

[WhiskeyGrinder]

2. Eishia Hudson, Chantel Moore, Ejaz Choudry, Marty Powder -- to name but a few -- would not find this

funny.

[gfwzig]

3. part of the problem is all usa police now use semi-auto pistols...as a gun owner

i have a semi 22 cal pistol.... i am a hunter,,, i can also say that it is impossible to fire a semi-auto pistol once and then lay it aside.... every time i use the gun i have an unquenchable desire to continue firing until it is empty.... police in the usa need to go back to guns that require the hammer to be pulled back before each shot.... the lone ranger never killed anybody but always shot the gun out of their hand.....

[sarisataka]

4. Small suggestion

You should have a trusted friend take all of your guns and securely lock them so they are inaccessible to you. Make your friend promise to not give you access until after you have received therapy building your self-control.

Also- the Lone Ranger is a mythical character. He can do anything the writer says he can do.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

6. What the fuck is this shit right here.

[StarryNite]

8. The Lone Ranger wasn't a real person.

[Treefrog]

9. I'm going to assume this is sarcasm.

Surely you don’t hunt with a “pistol?”

[PTWB]

12. Hunting with pistols and revolvers is relatively common

Many states have dedicated handgun hunting seasons.

[Treefrog]

13. Well, yuck.

On every level.

[Lurker Deluxe]

15. However

Many states also have very strict rules on what can, or cannot, be shot at with a rimfire round. 22s are generally frowned upon for hunting anything. To small for most ground animals, and way to risky to shoot up into the air. very light bullet that goes a very long ways.

[The Magistrate]

5. The 'Canadian' Intro Is Bullshit

Ludicrous, offensive, white-right bullshit.

[Disaffected]

10. Lighten up,

it's satire. No logical person would take it seriously.

[The Magistrate]

11. You Picked A Damn Bad Day For It, Kiddo

If this is your first encounter with Poe's Law, learn and remember.

[Treefrog]

14. I truly do love your posts.

[abqtommy]

7. I support your right to use Poetic License in posting this hilarious info. I've bookmarked it.