Hawley Concerned That Being a Coward Is Overshadowing His Work as a Fascist

[Nevilledog]

Link to tweet

https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/hawley-concerned-that-being-a-coward-is-overshadowing-his-work-as-a-fascist

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Senator Josh Hawley is “deeply concerned” that his newfound national reputation for cowardice is overshadowing his commitment to end democracy.

“People see one video of me fleeing like a terrified bunny, and they think that’s all there is to me,” Hawley told reporters at a press conference. “They’re totally forgetting that I’m also a guy who tried to overturn a free and fair election.”

Hawley admitted that, although it is tempting to stereotype him as “a guy who was scared shitless of a mob he had egged on earlier in the day, that’s just one side of me. What about the side of me that wantonly subverts democracy? That should count for something.”

“People are focussing on the totally chickenshit Josh Hawley and ignoring the lusting-for-autocracy Josh Hawley,” he complained.

Hawley’s press conference was cut short after a reporter asked a question and the senator ran away.

[FSogol]

1. Get thee to the greatest page. n/t

[SWBTATTReg]

2. Showing his chickens**t stripes for the state of Missouri, not a real good look, eh? It's time for

the show-me-state to step up, and elect someone who we all can be proud of, and not some loudmouth idiot whose best attribute is mouthing off constantly.

[raccoon]

3. Good satire is a thing of beauty. NT

[Wounded Bear]

14. Good satire is often hard to discern from reality...

especially in this case.

[gordianot]

4. Is this satire? I can no longer detect satire even with Borowitz.

[comradebillyboy]

5. When danger reared its ugly head, Lord Haw Haw bravely turned

and fled...

[Hermit-The-Prog]

6. Chicken-Hawl-A

From Monday TOONs
https://www.democraticunderground.com/100216967388

[UTUSN]

7. Bwah!

[Aristus]

8. Satire: Still dead.

n/t

[ancianita]

9. Borowitz knows Hawley's thinkin' it.

[erronis]

10. "Deeply concerned"? Really - there is a concern scale that needs to be followed.

[H2O Man]

11. Recommended.

Reading this resulted in hard laughter. Thank you!

[Nevilledog]

13. Present for you

[H2O Man]

15. And once again,

I am laughing loud enough to make the dog concerned.

[AdamGG]

12. They're not mutually exclusive