Life as an Abortion Doula

[WhiskeyGrinder]

https://www.rollingstone.com/politics/politics-features/abortion-doula-ash-williams-1235019642/

In 2016, Ash Williams became pregnant for the first time. Williams wants to be a parent eventually — but he wasn’t ready for a child then. He didn’t know much about what an abortion entailed, and he needed a ride, so he called up a friend who drove him. When they got to the clinic, Williams, who is trans, remembers the people working there didn’t care enough to get his name right — using, instead, the name on his license. Never mind asking about pronouns.

“Working with the actual provider was really fucked up, too,” he says. “I just remember he didn’t say one word to me, and I felt sad about that.”

After the procedure, Williams’ friend, who also happens to be trans, took over. Without asking what Williams needed, his friend purchased Maxi Pads for aftercare bleeding and cooked him a pot of collard greens with ham hocks to combat the low iron levels the pregnancy caused. “She cooked it in my house and didn’t leave for like a day or two, and I remember thinking, ‘Wow, you didn’t have to do that,’ ” Williams recalls. “I remember feeling like I didn’t want to be alone, but I also wasn’t using the words ‘Can you be with me?’ ”

Today, the 31-year-old Williams is an abortion doula, doing professionally what that friend did for him back then.

[dutch777]

1. Certainly a place for that in this world. Besides the physical issues, support on the emotional front is needed.

I would think that medical abortion providers would provide help or at least solid advice and regular phone support beyond just the clinical procedure into all the things the formerly pregnant body and person may need for some period of time before they get back to "normal". I can't imagine a person going thru that without family or a close friend to support.

But contemporary medicine is getting more and more myopic. I ripped up my knee muscles to the extent of needing surgery to put them back together. I was very limited in movement for six weeks while allowing the muscles to reattach before starting PT. Problem with basically just sitting and laying in funny positions to not put pressure on the knee, the muscles in my back got all tight to the point of painful spasms. Called the doctor to request allowance to start at least sitting PT to stretch out my back or massage or something. But all they could focus on was the knee. Hey, it's one big holistic system! All they would do was prescribe muscle relaxers which barely touched the issue. I finally got a heavy duty hand held massager and started my own self directed stretching and massage routine trying not to put pressure on the bad knee. I got thru it and luckily did not undo the surgeons good work, but I realized whether due to insurance issues or just surgical over focus on just the broken part, you better be a smart and resourceful patient or you may suffer more than needed.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

2. .

I would think that medical abortion providers would provide help or at least solid advice and regular phone support

Depends on the clinic.

I can't imagine a person going thru that without family or a close friend to support.

Some people do find it easier to go through it on their own or with minimal clinical support. But for those who need someone, a doula is outstanding.

[Solly Mack]

3. K&R