General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsWarning, Graphic: Abused for Surviving: What Amanda Lindhout Faces After Captivity
Last edited Thu Sep 26, 2013, 11:11 AM - Edit history (1)
<snip>
But the intensity of her presence was more than physical. Amanda Lindhout radiated a kind of peace I hadnt expected. After working for fifteen months on her case at the Committee to Protect Journalists, where I was senior editor, I had imagined her many times. She was the young journalist who at the age of 27 had been abducted by Somali insurgents and whose captivity had dragged on interminably. Taken with fellow freelancer Nigel Brennan, Lindhout was never far from my mind. Of all the horror stories Id reported and edited over my years at CPJ, hers stayed with me day and night.
Lindhout was reporting in Somalia in August 2008 when teenage boys kidnapped her along with Brennan, Somali translator Abdifatah Mohammed Elmi and driver Mahad Clise as they were returning on the Afgoye-Mogadishu road from interviews with refugees at a camp called Celasha Biyaha. The captors freed the translator and driver after 150 days.
As the months wore on, I couldnt get past my dread that Lindhouts story would not end well. That there had been so many unsuccessful negotiations with the two governments involved (Canadian, hers; Australian, Brennans) over so many, many days pointed toward an unhealthy outcome.
<snip>
If you paid any attention to the relentless victim-blaming of Lara Logan after her rape in Egypts Tahrir Square in February 2011, you might guess that Lindhouts immense suffering has not stopped many men from anointing themselves arbiters of what happened to her in Somalia. As news stories about her experience surged before her books publication, men swamped Lindhouts Facebook page and e-mail inbox with judgments, threats and comments on her appearance.
From one reader:
Tragic. Not just your ordeal but your stupid decision. Youre a good looking piece of leg.
In retrospect would you have rather had you dad give you a black eye or get gang raped? You have to answer that.
Well youre a published writer now. You traded your pussy for it.
I would have used my hands on you. Maybe even my fists. Why? Because of anger? No. To help you understand what men can do to women like you when they have no moral restraint.
<snip>
http://www.thenation.com/article/176323/abused-surviving-what-amanda-lindhout-faces-after-captivity#
Tigress DEM
(7,887 posts)Second, awesome that she's writing about it so the world can know her truth.
Third, **ck those idiots who think they have the right to judge her. I'm a woman, but I'm no little bit that that guy can lay his fists on without getting acquainted in an overly familiar fashion with his own back end. Stuff that mouth talking **it right where it belongs.
cali
(114,904 posts)been unbelievably vile.
Tigress DEM
(7,887 posts)But I won't be even sarcastically saying, "Oh it's all the woman's fault when she gets raped."
myrna minx
(22,772 posts)Dash87
(3,220 posts)'Did you entice them to rape you?' Who the hell would ask a dumbass question like that?
brer cat
(24,625 posts)I can't believe those people are even human to have so little regard for her situation.
cali
(114,904 posts)she's been faced with and the sheer vileness of her critics.
BlancheSplanchnik
(20,219 posts)The KKK of sexism exists. Maybe not organized in that way, but taking pleasure in violence towards women? Yes.
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)and disgusting, and while newsworthy, extremely shocking.
cali
(114,904 posts)msanthrope
(37,549 posts)Bernardo de La Paz
(49,047 posts)Praise be Amanda Lindhout and may she fare well.
Cyber-bullying in all its forms needs to be stepped on, hard. The anonymous posters need to be found out by police armed with court orders and search warrants. Those anonymous cowards need to be arrested, charged, prosecuted, convicted, sentenced, and jailed.
It is a peculiar form of weakness and psychopathy to cyber-bully a woman online with such ridiculous assertions.
All because she dared do something some men do (war zone journalism), something the cyber-bullies could never dare come close to doing.
AtheistCrusader
(33,982 posts)I don't have any words... Nothing.
mainer
(12,033 posts)Any monster who wrote those things to her should be named and shamed.
Hydra
(14,459 posts)But it proves 3 things that are highly inconvenient to real civilization: 1) 1 of every 20 men(and I bet it's higher) is a rapist, 2) Rape Culture is alive and well, and 3) The two things above are supported by certain groups of women, and they would have no traction otherwise.
I don't know what the solution is, but a solid problem continues in the form of how we treat victims.
Tigress DEM
(7,887 posts)1 of every 20 men is a bit high, I think.
Agree that Rape Culture is alive and well (and supported by many women passively).
The way that began is that if a woman spoke out she was a harpy type didn't get a good man/protector and her genes weren't passed on.
whttevrr
(2,345 posts)Sorry, I've heard the stories, the intimidation, use of drugs and alcohol...
It is shameful here in the U.S.; I can only imagine the prevalence being much higher in other places.
Tigress DEM
(7,887 posts)Which according to THIS site http://www.rainn.org/statistics
IS where we would be over the last 13 years IF Rape had not dropped by 60%
WHAT I AM SAYING IS THAT MEN IN THE US ARE MORE AWARE AND MORE CARING ABOUT THIS SUBJECT AND IT IS NOTICEABLE ENOUGH THAT 1 in 20 seemed way high.
Sexual assault has fallen by more than 60% in recent years.2 Had the 1993 rate held steady, 6.8 million Americans would have been assaulted in the last 13 years.
But, thanks to the decline, the actual number of victims was about 4.2 million. In other words, if not for the historic gains we've made in the last decade, an additional 2,546,420 Americans would have become victims of sexual violence.
Population 313,847,465 (July 2012 est.)
Age structure 0-14 years: 20% (male 32,050,686/female 30,719,945)
15-24 years: 13.8% (male 22,112,002/female 21,174,050)
25-54 years: 40.6% (male 63,713,761/female 63,556,345)
55-64 years: 12.1% (male 18,331,065/female 19,711,907)
65 years and over: 13.5% (male 18,424,785/female 24,052,919) (2012 est.)
http://www.indexmundi.com/united_states/demographics_profile.html
male 32,050,686
male 22,112,002
male 63,713,761
male 18,331,065
male 18,424,785
Total Males 154,632,299
Random adjustment - 18,424,785
Some males over 65 maybe still capable of rape and willing to do so, but some in the 0-14 range wouldn't know how to rape without explicit instructions and legally the definition is sketchy, so we'll cut the smaller group
Leaves approx 136,207,514 males potentially capable of rape.
1 in 20 = 5 in 100 or 5%
5% of 136,207,514 is 6,810,376
whttevrr
(2,345 posts)And I agree that there has been progress.
My point is I think there is a lot of under reporting, and a lot of ambiguity in the definition and implementation of what is rape. <~~That sentence is reprehensible in every way. But so is the ignorance of many people right here in the good ole US of A.
My own personal experience has lead me to avoid a particular type of woman that is heartbreaking. I cannot rationalize away the sexual dynamic that goes on. I knew a girl who would get very intimate with me but always said 'no'. So it would never happen. She was out with someone else and had a few too many drinks and said 'no' again but it was not heeded. It was rape but she herself did not report it nor seem too disconcerted by the occurrence. She even went out with him again. The cognitive dissonance is still to this day mind blowing. She probably was pretty torn up about it, but the stoic way she informed me was an epiphany for me. I was pretty young at the time.
I cannot physically proceed past the 'no'. My ego is innately entwined with the act. 'Yes' turns me on and 'no' turns me off. I see the 'yes' as an affirmation of desire and the 'no' as rejection. And while I cannot get over the ego bruise that is inherent in 'no', I do know that other men do not have that inclination. Their sense of entitlement does not comprehend what no really means. I do not proclaim a complete understanding of the psycho-sexual and power dynamics inherent in rape, but I do see the propensity of others to engage in such a thing. A good number of men believe there is something that is owed to them. It is shameful and ignorant.
In that shame and ignorance is the problem of under reporting.
And then there is this:
Sex Trafficking of Americans: The Girls Next Door
http://www.vanityfair.com/politics/features/2011/05/sex-trafficking-201105?currentPage=all
So, yeah... 1 in 20 seems a tad low when compared to the brutal reality.
Hydra
(14,459 posts)A lot of people accuse feminists of thinking that all men are rapists. That's not true. But do you know who think all men are rapists?
Rapists do.
They really do. In psychological study, the profiling, the studies, it comes out again and again.
Virtually all rapists genuinely believe that all men rape, and other men just keep it hushed up better. And more, these people who really are rapists are constantly reaffirmed in their belief about the rest of mankind being rapists like them by things like rape jokes, that dismiss and normalize the idea of rape.
I know the number is higher, because 1 in 3 women is sexually assaulted by the time they are 18, and 1/10 men as well. That number of victims does not come from nowhere, and underreporting is a HUGE problem.
The best place to see it oozing to the surface are events like these where people attempt to tar the victim or it becomes a kind of voyeuristic orgy for the people who might or might not be capable of rape but find it arousing hear what they went through.
Like I said, I don't know what to do about it, but it has no place in a truly civilized society.
fletchthedubs
(41 posts)I'm not a great looking guy or physically impressive by current standards. Long and skinny, needless to say getting laid outside a relationship is not that easy a task for me. In my younger days I was extremely aggressive, physically violent for little to no reason, wrestled and trained in martial arts from a young age followed by a stint in spec ops. There is a very small number of women in the world that could stand up to me if I decided to have my way with them and that goes for many men as well if I chose to do so. I don't need a law to tell me what is right and wrong, I have a sister, mother aunts grand mothers and female friends that I'd do anything for, and every woman in the world is at least one of those things to every man. Rape is something I've never been able to understand and have no idea how to stop. The military has training on how to avoid becoming a victim while its hopefully helpful for some I have seen little to no effort in eliminating the root cause of rape as well as disgustingly small penalties for such a heinous act. I could go on for hours about this subject but I'm pretty high right now and feel like I'm just rambling.
In many posts on this board I admit to being an active criminal in the marijuana trade so my ideas in this rant may seem opposite of my normal stance on laws and law enforcement. Strict sentencing and outrageous punishment for victimless crimes is a crime itself in my opinion as it takes away time and resources from important police work solving crimes like rape.
seabeyond
(110,159 posts)people on du dare to argue this is a problem. reading that, i sit here numb. this has become our world. women are talked about in this manner in every facet of our world. be it the net, our media, on the streets. this is what our girls will be raised in and this is what our boys will hear and learn.