Help ProFlowers come up with an appropriate ad campaign.

[Sparkly]

Imagine -- a flower company that wants to associate itself with the most vile insults against women, from "slut," "prostitute" and "round heels," to voyeuristic sex videos, aspirin for chastity, and the shame a woman's parents should feel...

They need an ad campaign to reflect these values, so that every woman who receives flowers for any occasion has a good sense of the company's values.

A few suggestions for their next ad campaign came up in this thread: http://www.democraticunderground.com/1002379636

I'm sure we can come up with a few more. Help them out here.

[11 Bravo]

1. Flowers: The perfect gift for that special slut.

[rustydog]

2. "Want to say you're sorry for calling a brave young woman a "slut"?"

Call 1-800-pro flowers and get our apology bouquet for 19.95.

[jsmirman]

4. Just cleaning up the link

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1002379636

I know it's poor form to laugh at something of your own, but I'm still kind of amused by my "Happy Mothers' Day... Slut!"

I'm sure that conservative women the world 'round would be just thrilled to receive one of those bouquets.

[Sparkly]

5. Thanks!!!

I'm amused by that, too!

Also, how about: "On Mother's Day, A special note of thanks..." Inside: "I wouldn't be here if you hadn't been such a sex-crazed round-heeled woman who couldn't afford birth control. I love you!"

[jsmirman]

19. I just die

thinking about the mouth that would get slapped out of my mouth if I sent my mother any of these!!!

[RockyMtnGuy]

6. I got some more...

1. Discounts from Douche Bags
2. Anniversary Roses, because even whores need luvin!
3. Carnations are for sluts, Happy Birthday Grandma!

[jillan]

7. Proflowers ~ the perfect gift for your slut.

[SpartanDem]

8. They could introduce a "bitch make me a sandwich" gift basket

everthing that worthless slut needs to make you a sandwich, while you enjoy the game.

[Justice wanted]

9. Pro flowers: We know how to treat the "Modern" woman

with a picture of dead flowers and used condoms.

[RockyMtnGuy]

10. Bill Strauss, CEO of ProFlowers, here's his email address

I invite all of you to send a polite, yet resolute emails to Mr. Stauss, CEO of ProFlowers. Just sent mine.

His email address is: [e-mail], copy email also to [e-mail]

Keep at 'em!

[niyad]

12. just sent mine

[Walk away]

11. How about "Proflowers Closed Down...Call 1-800-FLOWERS instead" nt

[niyad]

13. or support your local florists

[Matariki]

14. Oh haha. Take this to twitter #proflowers !

[RockyMtnGuy]

16. awesome idea!

[Matariki]

17. I'm having fun with it

[catrose]

15. Whether you blackened her eye or knocked her up

ProFlowers has the bouquet to make her forget...until next time.

ProFlowers, for when you're ashamed to shop locally.

ProFlowers, the wife beater's friend

Some men send flowers to say "I love you."
Others call ProFlowers.

ProFlowers, for the sluts in your life

ProFlowers: We'll screw you too.

This is fun!

[Matariki]

18. Mother's Day is coming up.

Tell your mom what a slut she is with a special bouquet from #ProFlowers

[aint_no_life_nowhere]

20. "Pro Flowers - Cause deep down, every woman at heart is a money grubbing Pro"

"Especially those money grubbers who won't pay for their own contraception"

[Faryn Balyncd]

21. I think you found their slogan!

[Blue Owl]

22. Spoil her with a Turdblossom Trollop Bouquet

The perfect gift for the big fat idiot on your list.

[The Genealogist]

23. "Easter will be here soon. Show your favorite slattern you care with a springtime bouquet"

"Mother's Day is just around the corner. Show the old slut how much you care!"