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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsMO Woman Possessed by Demon after Signing Up for ObamaCare
National Report Exclusive) Carla Jane McIntyre, a small web-business owner in Dexter, Missouri, signed up for ObamaCare. Within 24 hours, McIntyre was possessed by a Demon according to family members and observing clergy. Demons are malevolent paranormal beings that devour the soul.
The Honorable Reverend James Beck believes flaws in the website are responsible for McIntyres spiritual affliction.
Rev. Beck explains that just as repeated recitation of mantras will bring about demonic possession, long waiting times on the Affordable Care Act website, healthcare.gov, probably placed McIntyre in a trance, leaving her soul susceptible to corruption. Many demons tenderize the soul with oppression and corruption prior to full blown possession he explained in a phone interview.
She was babbling like a crazy person, says Jo-Jo Chambliss, McIntyres sister. She was maniacal, filled with some devil-power, repeating I have insurance, I have insurance like it was something sacred. I got scared how she put her own health before Gods plan for her to be sick.
http://nationalreport.net/mo-woman-possessed-demon-signing-obamacare/
I actually think this ISN'T Satire, but it's the funniest thing I've read in a while!!!
tridim
(45,358 posts)jberryhill
(62,444 posts)pinboy3niner
(53,339 posts)You're welcome.
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)I heard that's what happens if you don't pay your exorcist.
pinboy3niner
(53,339 posts)Has a nice ring to it but I can't judge for sure until you hum a few bars.
JHB
(37,163 posts)pinboy3niner
(53,339 posts)Xipe Totec
(43,892 posts)icymist
(15,888 posts)And those waiting in lines at the DMV, and those waiting in checkout lines at the grocery store, and those in traffic jams. Especially traffic jams! Why, with this logic, everybody who ever waited is possessed by daemons!
chollybocker
(3,687 posts)Or is Satan considered a 'Pre-Existence Condition'?
NuclearDem
(16,184 posts)joeybee12
(56,177 posts)icymist
(15,888 posts)I have no idea what this means!
Unknown Beatle
(2,672 posts)he's a bad mofo. Jedi master Obama.
Scuba
(53,475 posts)icymist
(15,888 posts)Jackpine Radical
(45,274 posts)mice?
FiveGoodMen
(20,018 posts)Sadly, I'm sure some really believed that.
IrishAyes
(6,151 posts)a woman called me up hysterical over that rumor.
Liberal Veteran
(22,239 posts)hatrack
(59,599 posts)sakabatou
(42,198 posts)hrmjustin
(71,265 posts)gcomeau
(5,764 posts)They're both satire news sites. But yes it is scary that it's hard to tell the difference between that and the actual crazies.
joeybee12
(56,177 posts)this sh*t!!!
awoke_in_2003
(34,582 posts)The line between satire and reality keeps getting smaller- it is hard to tell sometimes.
Gothmog
(145,794 posts)Here are some of the other stories on the politics webpage
Defiant South Refuses Obama Safety Initiative, Preferring Injury and Loss of Life Over Socialism
Maryland Middle School Requires Children To Cross Dress For LGBTQ Appreciation Day
Obama Presidential Library Planned for Ground Zero Freedom Tower!
joeybee12
(56,177 posts)read some of the freaking comments...some people think this is real!!!
Gothmog
(145,794 posts)I really laughed at that story. I have been following Christian Adams and the GOP's attempts to make an issue out of the New Black Panthers for years. This was a great way to deal with that story
Spitfire of ATJ
(32,723 posts)joeybee12
(56,177 posts)Do they turn the geysers on at night?
When do they let the bears out?
Spitfire of ATJ
(32,723 posts)A HERETIC I AM
(24,381 posts)Milton Freewater, Jr. is a fully accredited Journalism Major from Western Baptist College in Salem, Oregon. While journalism is his job, his true passion lies in collecting old subway tokens from around the world and his side job of being a childrens storyteller at local orphanages.
Arthur Hamilton, Director of Sales & Marketing
Arthurs fame started at age 13 when he won the first of what has become several Chili Dog competitions. Arthur used his love for all things chili dog to build a franchise of chili dog carts located in urban areas across the country. Arthur has since sold his share of the muti-million dollar business he founded and has found his passion within the walls of the National Report media complex as the Director of Sales & Marketing. Contact Arthur for questions regarding advertising space on National Report at nationalreportonline@gmail.com.
Lasher
(27,661 posts)This thread is destined for epic fame and glory.
Reading the reader comments now at the linked article.
icymist
(15,888 posts)pinboy3niner
(53,339 posts)MissMillie
(38,598 posts)Related to Glenn?
AndyA
(16,993 posts)That sister sounds like a real whack-o as well, "...put her own health before God's plan for her to be sick."
Has to be satire, but reality is often stranger than illusions.
hvn_nbr_2
(6,491 posts)Imagine how screwed she'd be if she were wearing some of Pat Robertson's demonic used clothing from Goodwill at the same time she was surfing the ACA demon-possessed website.
RainDog
(28,784 posts)longship
(40,416 posts)notadmblnd
(23,720 posts)Remember, god doesn't give you anything you can't handle
haikugal
(6,476 posts)it's getting really hard to tell satire from the religious zealots these days.
L0oniX
(31,493 posts)...after all ...no one should have to go through life looking like Rick Scott.
L0oniX
(31,493 posts)Finally ...a good use for them.
IronLionZion
(45,615 posts)cynatnite
(31,011 posts)I'm a little confused here.
Taitertots
(7,745 posts)shenmue
(38,506 posts)I think it'll take in the cost of going to see a local exorcist.