I hauled my kids out of a pizza parlor and some parents called the police

[FreakinDJ]

Happened some 20 yrs ago when I as a father was single parenting my 2 boys.

Very carefully before we entered the pizza parlor I explained to the boys then 5 and 8 yrs old. You will both be given $1 in quarters to play video games – that’s all we can afford. When it is gone we won’t cry for more quarters. There will be no running in the restaurant, there be no fighting over video games, there will be No Temper Tantrums of any kind. Both boys readily agreed and repeated the rules back to me so as to be sure they understood them.

I ordered and paid for the pizza and soda, was at the table waiting for them to bring it out when they began to run into trouble with the conditions.

I told my oldest its time to go. The younger 5 yr old fell to the floor getting ready to start his temper tantrum. I picked up the 5 yr old, placed him kicking and screaming over my shoulder and took the 8yr old by the hand and proceeded to exit the pizza parlor.

Several patrons followed me outside to write down the license plate number of my truck.

After we were home both boys proceeded to their beds, got undressed and got into bed.Once they were calm I took the time to talk to them to explain fully why we had to leave and it was their actions of breaking our agreement which forced the decision.

I also snuck over to the kitchen phone to ask the pizza parlor to “box up” the pizza they never had a chance to deliver to our table

Once they were calmed down and owned up to their own part – I reluctantly gave in and we returned to eat our pizza

ITS CALLED PARENTING FOLKS

and our Family Councilor applauded my actions

[Lex]

1. Cool story, bro.

I've seen something like that happen several times and no one ever followed the parent out to write down the license plate.

[demwing]

32. Your post was the subtitle to the voice in my mind

When I was done reading the ever so carefully written OP, the first words I thought were the first words you wrote.

[Jesus Malverde]

43. I didn't think people would be so wacked as to make shit up on the fly then some rockdude

posted about his nephew enjoying porn and when called out as creepy, said his nephew was imaginary literary device. It's like really!?!

[DesertFlower]

2. my niece had a tantrum -- not like her at all.

my brother in law took her into the bedroom and a few minutes later they came out and my niece apologized to everyone. i know he didn't hit her -- probably had a nice talk with her.

that being said i'm 72. my son was born in '61. back then kids didn't throw tantrums. never once did i ever see one.

now it's hard to go anywhere without seeing a kid letting out screams, etc. drives me nuts.

[Art_from_Ark]

16. Kids might not have thrown tantrums in public back then

because they knew that they would probably get a belt or a switch across their rear end when they got back home.

And no, I am not in favor of that kind of punishment. Parents who threatened their kids with that kind of punishment (and actually carried it out) were scary.

[DesertFlower]

21. not so. at least not in my case

or any of my friends. we might threatened them with punishment -- like taking away a toy or tv, but it didn't seem to be necessary.

[DesertFlower]

23. let's just face it. most of today's kids are spoiled

brats. i remember someone saying back in the 80s when her son was getting out of hand "i don't want to break his spirit". so just let him tear up the house and scream his head off. no thank you.

[AndyA]

3. I wish more parents would do this

It especially annoys me when parents allow children to run around restaurants, or shriek repeatedly. This disrupts everyone around, and the other patrons are not paying to be entertained or annoyed by unruly children.

I knew better than to act that way. My Mother would have removed me from the restaurant immediately, so I behaved myself.

Everyone thinks their children are adorable, they just don't consider they aren't as adorable to others, especially when you're trying to eat a meal and talk at your table and can't because of the commotion nearby.

Commendations for actively participating in your children's lives.

[Link Speed]

7. "I see you are one of those people who have a problem with kids being kids."

Some woman actually said that to me when I got on her little fucks for chasing our pet hummingbird around our store with their light sabers.

While she was saying that, the little darlings began to flail away at a world-class Agave Attenuata, worth maybe $3K. When I snatched their swords away, she shouted, "It's just a plant, you asshole".

Bad Parenting 101...

I could go on and on and on...

as could any retailer or restaurantuer in the US.

[AndyA]

8. I used to work in retail...

Came out of the stock room one day to find a six or seven year old playing with a CARVING KNIFE. It had a cardboard sheath on it, but he was sliding it back and forth. I took it out of his hands, and asked him to please not play with the knives, as they were very sharp and he might hurt himself or someone else.

I said, "OK?" and he nodded in response.

A few minutes later, he was back at it--only this time he had the sheath off the knife! I carefully took it from him and said, "Where are your parents?"

Standing on the other side of a display was a woman who said, "Is there a problem?"

I said, "Are you this young man's mother?" She nodded, and I said, "The problem is your son is playing with knives, and I've already asked him to not play with them once. Perhaps you should keep a better eye on him."

I was very nice about it. She responded that it wasn't any of my business, and that I should butt out.

I told her I was merely trying to prevent her child from injuring himself, or someone else in the store, to which she said again that it wasn't any of my business!

I told her the safety of the customers in the store was indeed my business, and I asked her again to please keep an eye on her son.

She told me again to butt out, and said she was leaving and would not shop there again.

Another customer stood about ten feet away with her mouth literally hanging open--she could not believe what had taken place.

That kid must be about 21 or so now. I wonder how he turned out.

[Ed Suspicious]

18. "Perhaps you should keep a better eye on him."

That would pretty much put me on the defensive and end any hope of discourse. As nice as you felt you were, it was really a pretty pointed request.

[delrem]

20. No no. I disagree. The ball was totally in the negligent mother's court.

I've had people take their *dogs* into my workshop! Saying "he's a well-behaved dog". There's no way to explain --- the danger to the dog, the economic danger to me, about equal I'd say except the dog would be 100% likely to be damaged by the experience.

Sometimes a person has to speak sharply, even if it means losing a customer or getting a dirty look.

[Yo_Mama]

25. The little boy was playing with a very dangerous item

I think the poster WAS being very nice about it.

Parents who let little children play with knives are nuts, bad parents, and neglecting their children.

[AndyA]

40. I guess you had to be there, but I wasn't being confrontational in tone or demeanor

But, there was a need for urgency for her to attend to her child--her kid was playing with a very sharp knife! She would have been on the phone calling her attorney before an ambulance if he'd hurt himself.

[winter is coming]

41. As it should have been. Stores aren't playgrounds.

If you've got a kid too young to understand not to mess with things, you need to be on top of that.

[avebury]

33. Several years ago I worked at a JC Penney. One day a Mom

came in with 2 young sons who proceeded to run wild while Mom looked at clothes. They ran around and dashed in and out of clothing racks. I was afraid that they would "take out" some of the more elderly customers with their rough housing. I made one boy sit in one chair and the other boy sit in another chair until their Mom was ready to leave (with space between the two chairs). I was firm with both boys and there was no argument. I don't even know if the Mother even noticed. I did not yell at either of the boys but was very calm and firm with an manner that let the boys in no uncertain terms not to argue with me.

I was in a laundromat this afternoon and an woman was there with her two boys. She didn't appear to pay much attention to them as they ran wild, the younger boy keep yelling at the top of his lungs. I cannot stand parents who make no effort whatsoever to parent their children in public or in private. Yes children will be children but it is the responsibility of parents to teach them what is acceptable and what is unacceptable behavior. In this instance, if you are going to bring children to a laundromat they are probably going to get bored so let them bring a toy to play with. While the washing machine is running, reading the child a book could be another option. Work on indoor vs outdoor voice. Improperly socialized children will have a rough time when they reach the age where they are expected to start attending school. And really badly behaved children can become pariahs with their classroom mates and excluded from activities arranged by other parents like birthday parties.

[Lizzie Poppet]

42. "I wonder how he turned out."

With a "parent" like that, probably shot by the police or his intended victim. And good riddance...

Yeah, I went there.

[DesertFlower]

9. "kids being kids" or kids being

little brats? a few years ago i was in the supermarket -- a large one. this woman had 2 kids who kept letting out screams. you could hear them even at the other side of the store. finally they were near me. i told the kids to shut up. the mother said "you can't tell my kids to shut up". i said "yes i can". she threatened to call the police. i told her to go ahead. finally my husband pulled me away. just what were the police going to do? i didn't break the law.

as i said in my earlier post kids didn't do that. my son was born in '61. never ever did he or any of my friends kids throw tantrums or let out screams. and they didn't have to be entertained. we lived in 2 bedroom apartments and when my friends came over with their kids or i went to their apartment the kids played in their room -- not in the living room. when they finished playing they put their toys back in the toy box. we didn't have toys all over the place like i see now. i watch HGTV and can't believe the mess people live in. i said to my friend "it must be staged". he's a realtor and said "no -- you would not believe what i see when i go into some houses".

[Lordquinton]

19. "Boys will be boys"

I don't think I have to elaborate on that point, and where it leads to.

[DesertFlower]

22. i had a boy. so did several of my friends.

one friend had 2 boys and a girl. they were all good kids.

[Lordquinton]

27. Good!

Thanks for actually being a good parent (no sarcasm, for real, thank you)

Too many people excuse boy's behavior, just look at Stubenville.

[DesertFlower]

28. i became a single parent when my son was 5.

he was my little "buddy". i'd take him out to eat with me. he loved chinese food even at a young age. when he was 6 i brought him to the beauty salon where i worked in greenwich village. it was open every night till 9 or 10. sometimes i worked at night -- sometimes i didn't. anyway i was off and i said to him "do you want to see where mommy works"? we got into my 66 mustang and drove to the village. when we walked in the door one of the guys came running up to him and said "say hello to your aunt raj". my son looked at him and said "you can't be my aunt -- you're a guy". lol. some people think i was wrong exposing him to gay people at such a young age, but i think it was the right thing to do. i always had gay friends and sometimes would take my son to their homes.

i don't know if my ex husband ever knew about this. he probably would have had a fit. one time when we were still together i took my ex to the gay beach. he said "i'm afraid to take my pants off". i said "don't flatter yourself". we were 2 people who never should have been married.

[Lordquinton]

31. Wow

some people amaze me. I'd be more concerned about exposing children to people like your ex...

[AndyA]

44. Parents should consider that shreiking, screaming kids could be painful to some people

A friend's mother used to suffer with migraines. They were so bad for a while that she had to go out and run errands even when she didn't feel like it. Normally, she'd just lie down in a quiet, dark room for a while and they'd subside, but she went through a period where even that didn't help much.

Screaming kids actually caused the woman to be in more pain. She nicely asked one woman to please quiet her kids down as she had a horrible migraine and their screaming was making it worse, and the mother told her to go the hell home if she didn't feel good!

I don't know why people feel it's OK for them or their kids to disrupt the entire area.

I've seen some of the houses on HGTV, and it is kind of shocking how some people live. Messy with kids is going to happen, but I remember keeping my room straightened and picking up after myself, and it wasn't a big deal. I knew my mom appreciated it, because she always thanked us for tidying up and told us how nice our rooms looked.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

10. Good lord....

....I don't know what I would have done. It likely would have ended in arrest though.

[Link Speed]

11. ...

in that store, we have a goldfish pond in the middle of the floor.

I was talking to two retired teachers when two women and a sulky kid came thru the door.

Teacher, "Oh, trouble".

Me, You can spot them just like that?".

Teacher, "I can spot the parents from 50 yards away".

We had these glass donuts in the pond that we would put cut flowers in and the fish would push them around, much to the delight of our customers.

Kid snatches a donut out of the pond, looks straight at me with vicious eyes.

"Don't do it."

Kid throws the donut onto the floor. Shatter...

I jumped all over him.

"You should have a sign."

"Really, can the little bastard read?"

"You should have a sign."

"OK, before you leave, could I follow you to the parking lot? I want to see if you have a sign on your car that says 'Dear Link, please do not jump up-and-down on my hood?'.

She called the Sheriff.

They Yelped all over us, saying I had threatened them.

Bad parents never accept responsibility for their little shits.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

13. A sign????

Do not drop glass it shatters?????

Holy shit, again, I would have ended up in jail.

[pipi_k]

4. One take on this

Would be that there may have been a couple of people in there who may not have known you were the parent

Like maybe they thought you were a kidnapper or something trying to make off with a couple of scared, screaming kids

I dunno. I guess you would have to ask them why they did what they did

[nolabear]

17. You might have a point. You can't assume people know you or don't make assumptions.

[FreakinDJ]

38. Possibly - but the older boy is the spitten image of me thou

It was stressful for me hauling the boys out to the truck when I looked up and saw them writing down my license number

[Aerows]

5. My sister used to pitch fits so badly that my mother

finally had to toss a glass of water in her face to get her to chill out.

[DLnyc]

6. I would say you handled it very well, and your kids are lucky to have quality parenting.

Some parents seem to be afraid to say no to their kids. I don't think this is good for the kids or for anyone else either.

Other parents resort to screaming or even violence. I don't think this really teaches the kids to behave. More likely it teaches them to be afraid and/or to scream and be violent.

The best parenting, I think, is firm, clear, reasonable and, most important, loving.

I salute you!

[FreakinDJ]

12. Both of them boys turned out very well

One is married, has a 2 yr old of his own, and recently moved into a good working class home with a nice yard for the kid to play in

The other is still single and currently over in Germany working on helicopters

[DLnyc]

14. Nice

What goes around comes around.

Thank you for this post.

[JDPriestly]

15. I would have done the same thing. I never, ever needed to hit my children. They understood the

rules and pretty much followed them. My grandkids are the same way.

I think that if you set the example and follow the rules, your children will want to copy you and also follow the rules.

My daughter makes agreements with her children so that if they go with her someplace, they will do or not do certain things. They keep their promises -- my daughter as well as the children.

It's called discipline also as in teaching self-discipline. To me, discipline does not mean violence or physical force but rather following the rules and following what you say you will do whether you promise yourself or someone else that you will do it. Parents have to set an example. By forgoing the pizza until the rules were followed you set an example for your children. A lot of parents would not have had the self-discipline to wait to eat until the children were playing by the rules.

[DesertFlower]

24. well said. nt

[FreakinDJ]

36. A son emulating his father is an act of love

So yes it is so very important to set the example

[rppper]

26. I can relate....former single dad of two here....

My first trip with both kids, 10 and 6, boy and girl in that order, to the grocery store was a disaster.....before going into the grocery store, I told them specificly what I would put up with and the consequences of breaking dad's law....didn't help, they were running around like mad men from isle 1 to isle 5(where dad's Irish temper took over....)....I stopped, made both kids hold onto the cart(under the threat of death and weeks of room time!), pulled my cart to a check out line where I told the cashier I'd be back in 15 minutes, and dragged both kids out, hands firmly locked in mine, and took them to my sisters house while I finished out.....neither ever got to go to a store, grocery, department, ANY....for several years....not for Christmas, not for birthdays, NADA! Nothing! Lol. I was a hard ass on my kids, but I had to play both roles as best I could, but my kids have never been arrested, never been hooked on drugs, are amazingly self sufficient and we talk several times a week. We look back on it and laugh now.....10-15 years later....that's when you know you've done a good job!

[2naSalit]

29. Well done, Dad!!

[TheMightyFavog]

30. I see this every day at work...

I've seen parents let their kids run around at full tilt in our library. (I'm afraid one of these days one of those running little kids is going to barrel into some poor little old lady and knock her over.) Inside voice and walking feet whenever you are inside, people, it's really very simple.

I've also seen parents let 2-3 year olds freely run in the parking lot instead of holding mom/dad's hand. All it takes is one inattentive driver in the parking lot, I don't even want to think about what might happen in that situation.

[dem in texas]

34. Yes, kids acted like that back in the 60's too

I know, I raised three. When one of mine got out of control, I would take the child to the restroom or to the car to calm down and then we would go back. If they were really acting out, we'd leave and go home.

We didn't have a lot money and I used to take them to Woolworth's which had a soda fountain. All were under 5 years old. I would let them order a soft drink and a donut. They had to sit in the seat and not get up, put a napkin in their lap, eat the donut with a fork, chew with their mouths closed and say please and thank you. That taught them how to behave when we ate out in public.
Nothing I hate more than going to eat in a restaurant and see children running around playing chase. Or worse, see children pull things off of shelves and leave them on the floor and the parents make no effort to make the child pick up the stuff.

Kids need to be taught to think of others and to respect other people's property. No wonder there are so many screwed up kids now.

[FreakinDJ]

35. Honestly - people who do not raise their children properly do them a great disservice

They have trouble in school because they won't sit long enough to learn

[B Calm]

37. K&R good job FreakinDJ!

[beachbum bob]

39. well done. I have had many

great evenings out ruined by parents that have no idea what parenting is about. Several years ago, we were having dinner at a rather nice restaurant when a table next to us was seated with a young couple with probably a 3 or 4 month old baby, This was a friday night around 7pm. It took about 15 minutes for the baby to start crying and the parents pretty much ignore doing anything about it. Of the course the restaurant staff was passive about this. After about 10 minutes or so, everyone was pretty much disgusted with this situation and I had enough of it myself. I spoke rather loudly to our server, loud enough for half the restaurant to hear me over the crying the baby....

"It would be way cheaper for these people to hire a babysitter than to pay for our dinner, please have the manager come here right now"

Long story short, the manager asked the young couple to leave if their baby continued to cry and disrupt the dining of others....The manager offered to comp our dinner and I said no. Next time we will just leave.

I have raised 3 kids and never would have thought of taking a 3 month baby into a nice restaurant on a friday night. It would have been so selfish to do so.