Oklahoma Protesters Threaten to “Secdee” From Union if Neil DeGrasse Tyson’s Cosmos is not Cancelled

[kpete]

Several weeks ago, citizens accused Tyson of using his Cosmos program to forward other agendas, not limited to a ‘homogay’ agenda, wizardry/haroldry, astrology and other vehemently anti-Christian teachings.


Concerned parents have accused Neil DeGrasse Tyson of ‘Ra’ worship and iconography, going as far as saying the titular narrator may be involved in a Wiccan Sun occult.

Delores Simmons, whose child was involved in the prior airing of Cosmos that precipitated the anti-science scare in Oklahoma, claims petitions are already going about to elect pro-Creation candidates for upcoming elections.

“If we allow this Tyson to keep publicly airing his beliefs, God just may strike us down with a cosmic meteor this summer. That would be ironic justice if you ask me, so we should just take this show off now before that happens.”


more:
http://topekasnews.com/oklahoma-protesters-threaten-secdee-union-neil-degrasse-tysons-cosmos-cancelled/

[Takket]

1. These nuts sound like Westboro to me.

nt

[Rectangle]

64. I wish they'd go ahead and Secdee already!!

[kratos00]

2. Cool

I would be ok with Oklahoma seceding.

[shanemcg]

3. Haroldry? lol n/t

[Ron Obvious]

13. Our Father Who Art in Heaven

Harold be thy name.

I think that's what they meant.

[Cirque du So-What]

15. One of my Irish-American buddies insisted

that it went, 'Halloran be thy name.'

[pipi_k]

22. When I was a child I swore

it was "Halloween my name"

[demwing]

40. Harold's Angels

Hark! They're singing!

[Ron Obvious]

43. I thought that was what the harelipped angels were singing?

I was never any good at understanding these things.

[demwing]

48. God controls the Angels, right?

And we know from up-thread that our father, who art in heaven, is named Harold.

Therefore, the Angels belong to Harold. They are Harold's Angels.

deductive reasoning, and stuff...

[hootinholler]

73. I thought he was Howard?

[csziggy]

20. It's number three on their list of charges!

3. Ra Worship/Haroldry

On a starry night in a field gules, Neil DeGrasse Tyson hovers above the Earth and teaches the words of Ra to all who will listen. Neil Tyson is a harold of Ra, poisoning the minds of the innocent with all sorts of ancient Egyptian curses and brainwashing. Look at the icons on the vest of Tyson and we can see the makings of Wiccan occultism.

From the link in the OP. Emphasis added by me.

They are clearly continuing the tradition of their cry to secdee.
"field gules" in heraldry is a red background - the photo in the article does not have a red background.
"Harold" could conceivably mean an improvisation (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harold_%28improvisation%29) but I doubt it.
Or maybe "Haroldry" refers to: http://www.webring.org/hub/chivalric?id=1;prvw;js=n - Haroldry for the Non-Harold - An Introductory Guide to the Excrescence and Expulsion of Unsuitable Badgers, Gimmicks, and Contraptions

If they are going to laud the scientists who happened to be religious, why are they ignoring that so many of them were persecuted by the Church? And why do they turn their backs on the science those people developed?

[Scootaloo]

55. "Field gules?"

If they were aiming for "heraldry" they're STILL WRONG.

THis is the silliest thing I've seen in forever.

[Tsiyu]

24. I lol'd

The Haroldrists worship this guy:

http://fallout.wikia.com/wiki/Harold

[longship]

36. DUzy for this sub thread! nt

[Warren DeMontague]

62. I preferer Frankitude. Or Larryosity.

Praise "Bob".

[eridani]

69. Yes!! And more slack now!! n/t

[Warren DeMontague]

70. Heh

[Stryder]

79. Indeed.

Praise Bob and pass the Frop.

[Retrograde]

66. Good. I always thought Harold Godwinson gets a bum rap

and it's nice to see someone standing up for him. Must be one of the episodes I missed,though.

Rather than have them secede or secdee or whatever, can we just have declare Oklahoma it's own special universe?

[Johonny]

4. I'm afraid of big government!; Government please force TV stations to cancel shows!!!!

[merrily]

45. Afraid of big government AND pro-religious freedom.

Hypocrisy, thy name is Republican.

[CBGLuthier]

5. I live here and I have neither seen nor heard of any organised protests.

So a couple of fucking idiots said some idiotic shit. I am sure you have idiots in your states too.

[Bluenorthwest]

16. It's satire from a satire site....

nt

[avebury]

19. But you don't realize just how easily that a story

like that could be true. This is Oklahoma we are talking about.

[LongTomH]

34. No Shit, Sherlock! I grew up in Oklahoma!

I escaped!

[Bluenorthwest]

52. What I realize is that with satire, those who don't get it are the punchline.

nt

[avebury]

57. Having seen all the absolutley unconstituational, insane

legislation that our state government has tried to pass (and be defended by an equally ludicrous State AG) there is nothing crazy that this state is not capable of trying to do. Rational though is not a part of the brain structure of most Oklahomans. You laugh at a satirical website but crazy is what we live with an a daily basis.

[avebury]

18. I have not heard anything either. nt

[DisgustipatedinCA]

6. Secession in a land-locked state. Sounds legit to me.

Of course, they may not have considered how difficult it will be to get a Velcro specialist into the new "country" of Oklahoma when it occurs to them that they can't even tie their shoes. Dumbfuckistan indeed.

[cherokeeprogressive]

7. "over 64% people in Oklahoma..."

Mmmmmkay.

[Iggo]

8. Heheheh...good one.

[1StrongBlackMan]

9. Hey protesters ...

if you don't like, or think Neil DeGrasse Tyson’s Cosmos is inappropriate ... here's an idea: during the time slot when it is aired, turn to one of the other 999 channels your TV has, or listen to the radio, or read a book, or go do some charity work, or fall down on your knees and pray.

[Jgarrick]

10. I do hope everyone (including the OP) realizes that this is from a satire website.

[Crunchy Frog]

33. It's impossible to tell the difference these days.

[Contrary1]

11. It's satire. Unfortunately, there are real people who are that ignorant.

Check out some of their other headlines:

http://topekasnews.com/

[Mz Pip]

12. This is satire

The key to good satire is that there is a grain of truth in it. I don't doubt that there are plenty of people who would love to see Cosmos cancelled.

[toddwv]

31. Definitely satire.

But I think there is more than a grain of truth in it.

I wouldn't be surprised if there were some righties that read it and thought "Hmmmm, that's not a bad idea! Can't wait for the my next local Tea Party meeting!"

[Cirque du So-What]

14. This is a satirical website

as revealed by a cursory glance at the homepage:
http://topekasnews.com/

Their website is somewhat clunky, and lots of their links aren't working. I especially liked one of them, however, the only way to describe it is through a Google webcache link:

God Drowns Boulder Colorado Marijuana With Biblical Flood, All Plants Destroyed
Behold, the power of God!

The National Weather Service issued a ‘Biblical Flood Warning’ for the Boulder, Colorado, area. Scientists nationwide cowered in fear and despair as an unprecedented rush of heavenly water terrorized the weed breathers of Colorado. They had no chance to pack and flee their homes, but only climb the highest objects nearest them and pray out to God for forgiveness.

Depth: Traffic clogs the Pearl Street bridge as crowds of people check out the level of the swollen river in downtown Grand Rapids. The river hit a record 21.86ft yesterday morning

Looking like pharaoh after God caused the parted Red Sea to come crashing down on his little sinful sot soldiers, a bewildered Barack Obama begged Congress to give aide money to Colorado. In an interview, a wide-eyed Obama confessed, “This Act of God, there is no way to prepare for this. All we can do is hope it lets up and then rebuild.”

Locals report the flood water came from nowhere, it just teleported and appeared over the Colorado Rockies. One local woman stated the water was at least ’20 feet taller’ than the tallest mountain peaks.

http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:Oh2lq8DTI-UJ:topekasnews.com/god-drowns-boulder-colorado-with-biblical-flood-all-marijuana-plants-destroyed/+&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us

[Erich Bloodaxe BSN]

17. Let them. I'm in favour of everyone who wants to seceding.

They just don't get to take any US land with them. But anyone who wants to give up their citizenship, fine and dandy. They can give up all the rights and privileges of US citizenship.

[valerief]

21. The stupid just keeps getting stupider, doesn't it? Oh, well, these nuts help to

publicize Cosmos, and the more people who watch it, the better!

[Jgarrick]

23. Satire website...story's not real...

[valerief]

50. It's impossible to tell nowadays. America is satire-proof. But thanks! nt

[Bluenorthwest]

54. No it is not impossible to tell

It's apparent at a glance. Sorry.

[valerief]

74. Not really. It's Oklahoma, after all. nt

[malaise]

25. Bye bye

Reduce the burning stupid

[Orrex]

26. That'll keep it from being true for sure!

[Gothmog]

27. I love good satire

This is a good example of satire

[Codeine]

28. Satire is hard. nt

[LongTomH]

29. Did an Oklahoma Fox affilliate censor Cosmos?

Oklahoma TV station censors evolution talk on Cosmos reboot.

This past Sunday, Carl Sagan’s universe documentary Cosmos was heroically resurrected after nearly 35 years. Taking Sagan’s spot in the space chair, Neil deGrasse Tyson — who has to be more famous at this point for the love he evokes from Redditors rather than for being a brilliant astrophysicist — is now ushering viewers through the mysteries of the universe. The reboot has so far been met with overly positive reviews, but not everyone is completely pleased with the way A Spacetime Odyssey is run. A television station in Oklahoma censored the first episode’s discussion about evolution.

Local Fox affiliate KOKH — which resides in Oklahoma City — did not simply bleep or cut out the evolution segments from the episode. Instead, it happened to interrupt the segment with a very conveniently timed news break, seen below.

As you can see, the news break wasn’t actually breaking news — it was just a simple preview for an upcoming episode. Regardless of the preview bumping talk of evolution off the air in a state infamously known for being at odds with teaching evolution in classrooms, the simple act of airing a standard news preview in the middle of any television premiere would be bordering on nuts.

I was raised in Oklahoma........I escaped, and I'm glad I did!!!!!

Edited to Add: OK, I just read the article the OP referenced and twigged that it's satire; but, coming from Oklahoma, I could believe it!!!!!

[Crunchy Frog]

32. I would be an enthusiastic supporter of this move. n/t

[etherealtruth]

35. Thank you! I needed this!

[MrScorpio]

37. I wonder if anyone else is as surprised as I am...

That these people have enough active neurons in their collective brain stems to operate their autonomic functions, much less make such an idiotic statement in public.

Satire? Had me fooled. Ha!

[raven mad]

38. More "morans" anyone?

[oldandhappy]

39. bye

[merrily]

41. Buh-bye.

[Spitfire of ATJ]

42. I wish Aladamnbamma got this funny.

[krispos42]

44. This needs a "not 'The Onion'" statement

N/T

[Bernardo de La Paz]

46. Perhaps, but the whole site there is satire. The article is satire. nt

[krispos42]

56. Oh dear

It's a sad state when reality and satire are indistinguishable.

[maddezmom]

60. Happens to the best of us

How are you doing?

[Bernardo de La Paz]

63. It nearly caught me. nt

[michijo]

47. This state never stops

This state never stops. They are dissolving marriage to avoid gays. Now they are "secdeeing". They also have the lowest rents in the usa. I guess this is because nobody wants to live there. I met one Oklahoman who wanted to "institute national spanking (of children)". Who can understand how they would have "state enforced spanking" when they dont want state validated marriage? Apparently they are quite free with logic in that state, that state I have never visited even once during my entire life.

[NaturalHigh]

49. This story is satire.

I know that some people really love to hate on my home state, but maybe they can at least stick to facts instead of stories from a second-rate version of The Onion.

[shenmue]

51. Be my guest!

Too bad it's not real. I wish they would get passports and head for the nearest airport.

[nadinbrzezinski]

53. Our father in heaven will send a meteor to strike the Earth this summer

as punishment... if these people were not as serous as they are... I would break into laughter.

They use all the elements of science every day. I guess somewhere in the Bible God encoded Maxwell's equations (Electricity you dumb shits), and the rest of us just missed it.

We need to pray more I guess.

By the way, these charges are straight out of the 16th century.

[maddezmom]

59. It is a satire site

Guess they fooled you.

[sakabatou]

58. Even though it's satire...

I would believe there are some people who are like this.

[Warren DeMontague]

61. Onion? Not Onion?

who can tell, anymore.

[rocktivity]

65. "Parents cite one kid became completely enamored with the show

during a terrifyingly supernatural event..."

rocktivity

[Martin Eden]

67. The Stupid ... it hurts! n/t

[TheKentuckian]

68. Pretty sad state of affairs this pokes at seeing how even some Okies found it plausible

Satire is difficult in these times, it is too hard to keep ahead of reality and even when it is pulled off we are left hoping it isn't more just a good guess or that it isn't picked up on as a fine idea and run with by some dimwitted yahoos.

[OKNancy]

71. There are nuts here, but I knew this wasn't real

I suggest you not post these satire site news articles like they are real

[Hip_Flask]

72. If there's any cosmic justice in this universe...

A meteor the size of a baseball will come blazing down and smoosh this woman's truck while leaving everyone and everything else unharmed...

I want to see what her rationalization would be...

[Arkana]

75. They had me at "homogay agenda".

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

76. It's satire, but it's getting harder and harder to tell these days.

[KamaAina]

77. SECDEE!!

[Enthusiast]

78. That is some funny shit.

[Vattel]

80. Why do predictions of divine events

always say that the event will occur in the summer?

[spanone]

81. i encourage them to secdee, asap.