DUer 'onestepforward' has passed away.

[AllenVanAllen]

I'm Terri onestepforward's husband Gabriel Marquez and I wanted to let her DU family know she committed suicide last Thursday and I am utterly devastated. She made DU a daily part of her life and she learned so much and made such wonderful connections here over the past few years. She appreciated how important and wonderful this place really is and it was very special to her. It's hard for me to breathe right now but I did want to let her DU family know she LOVED all of you so, so much and I wanted to to convey my appreciation to you for all you gave her. You all meant so much to her. Thank you.








Here's a link to her final DU post

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018614115

Once again, Thank you.

[Electric Monk]

1. So sorry to hear that. R.I.P.

[HangOnKids]

2. Peace and Love

[JI7]

3. i'm so sorry

[silverweb]

4. Oh, no...

[font color="navy" face="Verdana"]I'm so very sorry for your loss -- and sorry that I didn't really know her.

Thank you for letting us know.

[RGinNJ]

5. I am very sorry. RIP

[Paulie]

6. I'm so sorry!

[Mnemosyne]

7. I am so very sorry, AVA.

Please be kind to yourself.

I know.

[nilram]

8. sorry for your loss, I so enjoyed that post

Last edited Wed May 14, 2014, 12:55 AM - Edit history (2)

So sad for whatever onestepforward could not bear any longer and for your loss.

[Behind the Aegis]

9. I am very sorry for your loss.

In case you didn't know, there is a Bereavement (Group) at DU.

[sheshe2]

10. I am so very sorry for your loss.

RIP Terri.

[BainsBane]

11. I am so very sorry

What a tragedy. My thoughts are with you and the rest of her family and friends.

[polly7]

12. I'm so very sorry.

Peace and strength to you and yours.

[DesertRat]

13. I'm so sorry, Gabriel

My thoughts and prayers are with you. Peace be with you.

[nadinbrzezinski]

14. I am sorry for your loss

And if there is anything I can do, even if it is just moral support, do not hesitate to call for it. I am sure most people will not hesitate.

[Hoyt]

15. I am so sorry. I responded to that post of the beautiful fireflies.

I even sent the link to others.

My wife passed away unexpectedly a little over 5 years ago. Please let us know how you are doing.

[StarryNite]

16. I'm so very sorry.

R.I.P. Terri.

[Le Taz Hot]

17. Please accept our deepest condolences

to you and your family for this terrible loss. Please let us know if there is any way in which we can help ease your pain, even if just a little.

[Ichingcarpenter]

18. I'm sorry for your loss .. she will be missed on DU

You can see what she recommended and what she stood for....
I will miss her. RIP

[TexasTowelie]

19. I'm so sad to read this news about Terri.

I'm also going through a tough period in my life and overdosed. She contacted me via DUmail at the end of last month and we exchanged a couple of messages that provided encouragement to me. She regularly posted on some of my OPs and I admired her as a kindred spirit.

I'm not very far away from your location and would be interested to attend a memorial service for her if any are being held.

Please accept my deepest condolences and pass it along to her family also. I will miss seeing her posts on DU.


I am going to cross-post this in the Texas Group since she was an active participant in that group so that others will see it.

[Gravitycollapse]

20. I don't know what to say. This is devastating. I hope you find respite from this storm...

in knowing that love never dies. It lives within us forever for as long as we give it residence.

[nomorenomore08]

45. +1

[Fearless]

21. .

[defacto7]

22. I am so sorry you have to walk through this...

What a terrible tragedy and a shock. Please be well. There is so little I can say but as a member of this community and the planet I wish you comfort, strength and the peace to move forward. Look to those fireflies.. follow the beauty of that moment.

[denbot]

23. I am very sorry for your loss.

No words can help. Her last post was passed to my wife, and she saved all the images and now are her wallpaper for both her work and private machines.

Again sorry for your loss.
Peace

[Duppers]

24. I am also so very sorry.

I know your pain is almost too much to bear right now, so keep reaching out when you can.

As someone else said, please be kind to yourself. You're what we, here, have left of Terri.

{{{HUGS}}}

[Violet_Crumble]

25. RIP Terri...

I'm so sorry for yr loss, Gabriel...

[intaglio]

26. There's no comfort I can offer except share the weight

She loved you and us but the hellish illness of depression overcame her. Remember, you shared many good times and that you gave her the greatest gift - extended happiness.

[No Vested Interest]

27. So very sorry. I hope you will continue to find your way here

to DU, where solace is freely given to one's heartache.

I did not know Terri, but clearly she was special, and she will be missed.

[RainDog]

28. my deepest condolences

I'm so sorry, so very sorry to hear.

[villager]

29. What terrible, terrible news

Thank you for posting it here, as hard as that was to do.

Condolences, and please take care of yourself in this tough, tough time

[MADem]

30. How horrific for you. I rec'd that post--thought the fireflies were quite amazing.

Can't imagine what you are feeling or how you're coping; suicide is something that the people left behind often have tremendous difficulty resolving in their minds. It's just not well understood, and it is terribly painful for family and friends. I am so sorry for your loss.

[awoke_in_2003]

161. As did I...

I haven't seen fireflys since I moved to Texas.

[mazzarro]

31. So sorry about this - may she rest in peace

It is a tragedy that her DU family was not able to help her in her time of distress. My thoughts and prayers are with you and the rest of the family and friends.

[barbtries]

32. i am so sorry

[eridani]

33. Sorry that you are going through this

[Solly Mack]

34. I'm so sorry to hear this. I'm sorry for your loss.

[Hekate]

35. I'm so very sorry for you loss, AVA. May you find peace and healing for your pain...

... and may Terri rest in peace.

[tofuandbeer]

36. God. I'm sorry. Hold on dear Gabriel.

[spooky3]

37. My sympathy to you.

[davidpdx]

38. Damn I really am sorry to hear that

I didn't know her unfortunately. We seem to be having a lot of deaths on DU lately.

I know how she feels and have been there on the edge way too many times. It makes me sad to hear about her passing.

I hope someone will at the end of the year put together a photo montage of all the people we lost so we can be reminded. I always don't catch these types of notices and I'm sure many other's don't either unless they are here a lot.

[murielm99]

39. I am so very sorry.

Please stay in touch with us. I don't know what else to say. Maybe we can be of some comfort to you.

[LibDemAlways]

40. I am very saddened by this and hope that

memories of better days will help to sustain you and bring you comfort during this sad time and in the days, weeks, and months ahead. Sending sincere condolences and wishing you strength and peace.

[MissDeeds]

41. Oh my god

This breaks my heart. I am so sorry for you and your loss, and for the pain that dear "onestepforward" could not overcome. You both will be in my thoughts in the coming days.

[area51]

42. I'm so sorry.

[KT2000]

43. Oh no -

I remember that post. So very sad and I am so sorry for your loss.
Peace to you.

[Unknown Beatle]

44. I am so sorry for your loss.

RIP Terri

[Tsiyu]

46. I am so sorry to hear this

My oldest sons' dad did this as well. I spent a lot of years feeling guilty, thinking I could have done something.

His own dad - who found him - helped me come to terms with that guilt.

It's funny, I was just talking about her firefly thread a few hours ago. My daughter called today and was talking about friends from California being amazed by fireflies. I was telling my daughter about onestepforward's thread and how cool it was, and how from that thread I learned there aren't fireflies everywhere in the US. I could SEE the images she posted so clearly in my head as I was describing them to her.

Then I click on that link to her last post and....just.......wow.

Thank you for telling us about this horrible loss. Please reach out to DU if and when you need someone to lean on. DU is a very supportive place.

We have lost a dear one. I can see that in her eyes.





RIP Terri Lea...

May you find peace

[mahina]

47. Aloha oe, Onestepforward.

Peace to you, your husband and your ohana.

Sorry to see you go. A hui hou.

[nomorenomore08]

48. I can't imagine the pain of losing her, especially this way. And it both bewilders and frightens me

that someone could take her own life so suddenly and (seemingly) without warning.

Depression is an awful, awful thing. For some it's as deadly as cancer.

[KC]

49. Thank you for letting us

know about Terri. This must be so hard for you. She will be missed here on DU!
RIP Terri

[Cha]

50. ..

RIP Teri Lea Gwin~Marquez

[Jim Lane]

51. We will miss her. :(

I liked the fireflies but I see she was also the one who posted the baby meerkats last month: http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018602980

I sent that link to a couple people.

Best to you as you try to cope with your loss.

[The Traveler]

52. There are no words adequate for this

I am so sorry to hear this news. I wish I had words that were helpful at times like these but I don't. I know this hurts like hell, and it is going to take awhile for that to ease. Keep your friends close. Know you will find lots of support here, too. Take care, bud.

Trav

[AverageJoe90]

53. My sincerest condolences to you, dear AVA. ='(

Terri will be missed by all of us. R.I.P.

[Joe Shlabotnik]

54. Oh my. I'm so sorry to hear of this tragedy.

What a loss for all. I sincerely hope that your family finds strength and peace and understanding as you work forward through this incredibly difficult time. (and her final post was so beautiful too)

[mnhtnbb]

55. I am so very sorry to hear this.

I saw the thread she posted about the fireflies and just loved it!
Such magical photos.

While I didn't know Terri, I am so saddened to know that she was dealing
with so much pain that she could only find one way to make it stop. It must
be just utterly devastating for you. Please come here to DU to share your
grief. Sending cyberhugs.

[AngryDem001]

56. I am so sorry.

[shenmue]

57. Rest in peace

[malaise]

58. Deepest sympathy to you and yours

[napkinz]

59. I'm so sorry ...

{{{{AllenVanAllen}}}}

[Heather MC]

60. My Condolences for your loss :-(

[MerryBlooms]

61. Oh no, I'm so sorry. Please accept my deepest condolences.

[livetohike]

62. My sympathy to you and your family and all who knew and loved Terri. May the good memories that you

have help to ease the sadness of her loss. Please stay with us on DU - our family will miss Terri's posts and are here for you. Rest in peace Terri

[theHandpuppet]

63. My condolences to you and to family

She will be sorely missed but lovingly remembered.

[Scuba]

64. My condolences. RIP Terri.

[maddezmom]

65. So sorry to hear this

My condolences to you. RIP Terri.

[Live and Learn]

66. Arrgh, it is so hard to lose the compassionate and yet

so hard for them to accept and live in this utterly imperfect place.

Thank you for letting us now and my sincerest condolences to you.

On the rare occasion that I am fortunate to see a firefly, I will be definitely think of Terri and be reminded that good souls do exist.

Surviving a spouse, is always hard and losing one to suicide is nearly unbearable. But there is very little one can do to protect these sensitive souls from the world that they cannot bear.

I think DU is a refuge for many perceptive and sensitive individuals. It is extremely unfortunate that even those of like mind and those closest to an individual can't always be enough to shelter one from the sometimes unbearable realities of this life.

Again, my sincerest condolences upon your (and our) great loss.

[brer cat]

67. I am so sorry for your loss.

I will never see a firefly again without thinking of Terri. I hope that you find comfort in the memories she left behind.

[cate94]

68. I am so very sorry

for your loss.
May Terri RIP

[Hoppy]

69. So sorry.

Be sure to take care of yourself.

[azurnoir]

70. Her last gift to DU was incredibly beautiful

may you find the strength and healing to get you through this

[Dorian Gray]

71. I am so sorry

for your loss, her husband's loss and that she took her own life. Extraordinarily sad.

[Cooley Hurd]

72. I am profoundly saddened to hear of this...

My sincere condolences.

[Proud Liberal Dem]

73. So sorry :(

n/t

[Skidmore]

74. So very sorry that she has left you and us.

Please accept my condolences and warm thoughts.

[B Calm]

75. I wish I had the words to ease your pain.

[PeaceNikki]

76. I am so very sorry for your loss. Peace and comfort.

[Rhiannon12866]

77. OMG, I am so profoundly sorry!

Last edited Mon May 12, 2014, 08:07 AM - Edit history (1)

And I remember that post, recommended it early on, thought it was beautiful, as was she. Words fail me, thank you for letting us know and my heart goes out to you...

[Surya Gayatri]

78. May the Universe give you comfort and ease your pain, Gabriel. I didn't know

Terri here, but the wish is no less sincere. Be sure to take good care of yourself . You are fragile and vulnerable right now.

P.S. Terri appears to be a wise soul. This life is but one step in a much greater journey and she has moved on.

[SamKnause]

79. I wish you the strength to endure this terrible loss.

I am truly sorry.

[99Forever]

80. ..

[whathehell]

81. I am so sorry for your loss!

How good of you to think of us...Please take care of yourself, it must be so hard for you now.

[Lefta Dissenter]

82. Oh, my.

Words just can't express how sorry I am. I hope you are surrounded with loving people who can support you in this terribly difficult time.

I am so, so sorry.

[AllyCat]

83. I'm so sorry.

Thank you for letting us know. May peace come to your family in time. Godspeed Terri

[stonecutter357]

84. .

[Ferretherder]

85. I hope you find the strength you need...

...to carry on without her. I will send all the positive vibes I can muster your way.

So sorry for your loss.

[etherealtruth]

86. I cannot adequately express how sorry I am

There are no words

[myrna minx]

87. My heart aches for you and yours. She will be missed.

[GentryDixon]

88. I am deeply sorry for your loss.

May you find peace.

[TBF]

89. I'm so sorry Gabriel -

Thanks for letting us know what happened and I will be keeping you in my thoughts.

[a kennedy]

90. OMG.....I'm so sorry.....

[riqster]

91. Condolences to you.

[GreenPartyVoter]

92. Oh no! I am so, so sorry!

[Bossy Monkey]

93. So so very sorry. All condolences. n/t

[Demo_Chris]

94. I am sorry for your loss. :(

[meegbear]

95. .

[handmade34]

96. (((...)))

[spanone]

97. ....

[xchrom]

98. may Peace be with you at this very difficult time. nt

[Call Me Wesley]

99. Safe passage to Terri.

May she be free from suffering. Peace and comfort to you and yours.

[BumRushDaShow]

100. OMG I posted on her last thread

I am not a lounge lizard but her thread bubbled up on the front page showing a photographer's long-exposure pics of fireflies.

I hope her pain is gone now and she has joined the little lightning bugs in the glow of the universe.

[GentryDixon]

252. What a beautiful post.

[MuseRider]

101. I am so very sorry for your loss.

Keep breathing no matter how hard it is.

Sending wishes for peace for both you and Terri.

[blm]

102. ((Terri))

.

[ctsnowman]

103. So sorry

[RKP5637]

104. I'm very saddened to hear this!

[marions ghost]

105. Thank you

for sharing her story and yours. So sorry to hear. Glad that DU meant something important to Terri. We all need connections and affinity groups can be found.

It's obvious how much you cared AVA. We feel your grief and shock. Sometimes we don't have loved ones as long as we imagine we will and there's no fault or blame. This is the condition of life as we know it. It is fragile and fleeting. Beautiful and magical, and harsh as jagged rocks.

But now she flies with the fireflies in limitless freedom and joy.

May you find peace and wisdom through this.
Love is all,
marion

[lovemydog]

106. May Terri rest in peace

and may you, Gabriel, honor her by living with a joyous spirit. Thank you for your post.

[yellerpup]

107. Such tragedy.

My heart goes out to all who loved her.

[BarbaRosa]

108. Oh no

I so sorry.

[JustAnotherGen]

109. Oh

My heart breaks for you.

[laundry_queen]

110. I'm so very sorry

[66 dmhlt]

111. May all the fond memories you have of her be a balm in your time of sorrow ...

[raouldukelives]

112. So very sorry.

[Sissyk]

113. I'm so very sorry for your loss, AllenvanAllen!

Please surround yourself with family and friends.

[rurallib]

114. she will be greatly missed

condolences from the rurallib family

[City Lights]

115. I'm so very sorry for your loss.

May you find peace...

[antiquie]

116. <<<<comfort>>>>

[warrior1]

117. .

[TeeYiYi]

118. (((((((Gabriel Marquez)))))))...

I am so sorry. May she find peace.

TYY

[greatauntoftriplets]

119. My deepest condolences for your loss.

[merrily]

120. Thank you for letting us know. Also, thank you for the link to her post, which was lovely.

I am so very sorry for your loss.

I don't know what else to say. I wish I did.

[alfredo]

121. So sorry so sad

[matt819]

122. Condolences

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Great last post.

[AllenVanAllen]

123. thank you so much everyone. i am so very touched by all of you kind words.

my heart is broken. this world has lost one the most beautiful, kind and caring souls i've ever met. she showed me how to use my wings. she told my how to reach the stars. she inspired me to be brave and open my heart to let in healing light and chase away darkness. she was my greatest teacher and my best friend. she was miraculous, she was magic. she was true depth. she made me a better man. this beautiful girl, i still feel her now. she moves inside me. she will live within me for all of my days. yes, my heart is broken and i'll never be the same but i am so grateful for every moment i had with her. i was so lucky to have shared part of her journey with her. and in my heart i feel her journey is far from over.

i love you my darling wife. i will carry you in my heart forever

this was her favorite song. she adored this version and to me it feels like her theme. it describes her heart. yes, it does so well.

i'll let everyone know information about the visitation on saturday the 17th here in houston texas later on today. thank you guys.

[toby jo]

171. Such true and gentle emotions. She was in such good hands…

... a Vincent with her starry night.

[Puglover]

124. I am so sorry Gabriel.

I wish you strength and healing.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

125. I am so sorry to see this. My condolences to you. May she rest in peace.

[Evergreen Emerald]

126. Such a loss.

I enjoyed reading her posts. I am so sorry for your loss. It is heartbreaking. My best to you.

Emmy

[sybylla]

127. How very difficult for you and her husband.

I had a brother-in-law commit suicide. It's a completely different kind of death to mourn, with different obstacles to overcome. There's still a lot of stigma in our society for suicide. And a ridiculous amount of blaming family and friends who didn't (and couldn't possibly) find a way to stop it.

There are organizations out there to help you and onestepforward's husband and family deal with it all. My local org is called Survivors Of Suicide (SOS) because that's exactly what you need to do - find a way to survive the suicide of a loved one.

If you need someone to talk to who understands and won't judge, message me and I will give you my contact info.

I am so sorry for your loss. May you find comfort in knowing you were a friend to someone who truly needed one.

[hrmjustin]

128. I am so sorry for your loss.

[gademocrat7]

129. I am very sorry for your loss.

[panader0]

130. So sorry RIP Terri....

[Beaverhausen]

131. I'm very sorry for your loss

Condolences to you and your family.

[graywarrior]

132. So so sorry, Gabriel

Peace and love.

[William769]

133. So sorry to hear this.

May she rest in peace.

[sinkingfeeling]

134. You have my deepest condolences.

[Sissyk]

135. I'd like to leave you with this.

The Dragonfly Story
Once, in a little pond, in the muddy water
under the lily pads, there lived a little water beetle
in a community of water beetles. They lived a simple
and comfortable life in the pond with few
disturbances and interruptions.

Once in a while, sadness would come to the community
when one of their fellow beetles would climb
the stem of a lily pad and would never be seen again.
They knew when this happened; their friend was dead,
gone forever.

Then, one day, one little water beetle felt
an irresistible urge to climb up that stem.
However, he was determined that he would not leave forever.
He would come back and tell his friends
what he had found at the top.

When he reached the top and climbed out of the water
onto the surface of the lily pad, he was so tired,
and the sun felt so warm, that he decided he must take a nap.

As he slept, his body changed and when he woke up,
he had turned into a beautiful blue-tailed dragonfly
with broad wings and a slender body designed for flying.

So, fly he did! And, as he soared he saw the beauty
of a whole new world and a far superior way of life
to what he had never known existed.
Then he remembered his beetle friends
and how they were thinking by now he was dead.
He wanted to go back to tell them,
and explain to them that he was now more alive
than he had ever been before.
His life had been fulfilled rather than ended.

But, his new body would not go down into the water.
He could not get back to tell his friends the good news.
Then he understood that their time would come,
when they, too, would know what he now knew.
So, he raised his wings and flew off
into his joyous new life!

~Author Unknown~
from MountainWings.com

It helped my young nephews through the hard time of the loss of their mother. Then, me through the loss of my younger brother even though it was meant, I think, for kids.

Since Terri liked fireflies I figure she would like dragonflies. And you will start noticing them all around you; their beauty, grace, and poise.

Peace to you, AllenVanAllen!

[WillyT]

136. (((((((onestepforward)))))))

Peace...

[TorchTheWitch]

137. OMG how tragic!

I'm so very sorry! I never seem to know the right thing to say in times like these, but both you and her are in my thoughts and prayers.

[riverwalker]

138. so sorry

Gabriel, we are all here for you.

[scarletwoman]

139. I can't imagine the pain of losing a loved one this way.

May you find peace and strength.

[mopinko]

140. it's not your fault. it doesn't mean she didn't love you.

i think a lot of women depressives love so hard it is like an undertow.
and tho this was perhaps a preventable tragedy, that doesnt mean that the tools were in the right hands at the right time with just the right thing to say. nobody knows what that would have been for her.

to you and yours. she was a lovely woman. embrace your broken heart. it is the only one you have.

xoxoxoxoxooxo

[LoisB]

141. I am so sorry.

[valerief]

142. RIP, Terri. nt

[cyberswede]

143. Very sorry to hear this.

Condolences to you and your family.

Her last post was beautiful.

[2naSalit]

144. ...

[greatlaurel]

145. Please accept my condolences.

Thank you for letting us know. Be extra gentle with yourself and take care during this difficult time.

[Sheepshank]

146. sometimes wanting peace is everything

I am so sorry for such devastating news. Gentle hugs to you and the rest of the family dealing with such tragedy.

[nolabear]

147. I am so, so sorry. I hope you find peace.

She was lovely, as were the bits of herself shared here. I hope you'll know your sorrow is echoed by those of us who knew her even a little.

[Greybnk48]

148. ...

Please accept my sincere sympathy. She will be missed.

[magical thyme]

149. I am so very, very sorry for your loss...

[Tom_Foolery]

150. So sorry for your loss...

[LiberalLoner]

151. I am so sorry for your loss.

Not many posts on DU make me cry. This one did.

I am so sorry. May the angels comfort you during this time of grieving.

[armed_and_liberal]

152. My condolences

Very sad to hear of your loss, I lost a loved one to suicide some years ago and it still hurts.

[Coventina]

153. Hugs to you Gabriel, at this difficult time.

{{{Gabriel}}}

Please let us know how you are doing.

I remember, from my own losses, how long the process of grieving can be.

This community will be here for you, every step of the way.

[bigtree]

154. very sad

. . .

[MoonRiver]

155. I am so, so sorry for your loss.

R.I.P. Terri

[kairos12]

156. No words could express how sorry I am to hear this. My condolences to her entire family.

[Amaril]

157. So very, very sorry for your loss.

Know that we're all here for you, Gabriel.

Rest peacefully, Terri.

[CrispyQ]

158. My sympathies to you & your loved ones.

Rest in Peace, onestepforward. You will be missed.

[octoberlib]

159. My deepest sympathies to you and your family.

I will forever think of onestepforward whenever I see a firefly.

"What we have once enjoyed, we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes part of us." -Helen Keller

[broadcaster75201]

160. Horribly sad. I am so sorry. n/t

nt

[MissB]

162. I am so very sorry

I loved that last post of hers.

I'm terribly sorry for your loss.

[Gothmog]

163. May she rest in peace

[Eleanors38]

164. My deep condolences. This is so sad.

[progressoid]

165. There are no words.

[cp]

166. We share your sorrow

Dear Gabriel,
Three of our friends have lost loved ones to suicide. It's a terrible loss.
When you are ready, this is an excellent book:
Suicide survivors : a guide for those left behind, by Adina Wrobleski, Minneapolis, Minn. : Suicide Awareness Voices of Education, 2002. (at most public libraries or http://www.save.org)
Please be kind to yourself and let others give you kindness. We care about you.
cp family

[niyad]

167. so very sorry for your loss, gabriel. may you find peace and comfort. and know that

DU is a family, and your family is here for you.

[elleng]

168. Oh my goodness.

Thank you for posting, and our thoughts are with you.

[ScreamingMeemie]

169. Gabriel, I am so sorry.

I will keep you in my thoughts.

It is hard. So very, very hard. Know that you are not alone.

[mokawanis]

170. So sorry to hear this

My condolences to you and to other family and friends.

[PumpkinAle]

172. Condolences Gabriel

and may Terri RIP.

[glinda]

173. Am sorry for your loss, Gabriel. She

looked and seemed to be an amazing human. So sorry she was sad and could not stay with you or us. This is deeply and sincerely heartbreaking news. What a gentle, lovely and thoughtful soul she seemed to be.

[Iggo]

174. Terri!!!!!

[steve2470]

175. my sincerest condolences to you and your family nt

[Feral Child]

176. Very sad.

Sincere condolences, Gabriel.

[locks]

177. I loved the great pictures of fireflies

as I don't get to see them in the west. She will be sorely missed, I'm sure. Thank you for the post and we will all be thinking of you.

[Tikki]

178. We are so very sorry for your loss..

The Tikkis

[CherokeeDem]

179. I am so very sorry...

May you and your family find peace in her memory....

[nclib]

180. I'm so very sorry for your loss.

[virgdem]

181. I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved wife...

May she rest in eternal peace!

[Lifelong Protester]

182. My sympathies to you

I am so sorry for your loss-words seem pretty inadequate.

[Marrah_G]

183. I am so sorry

She was beautiful and talented.

[joeybee12]

184. So very sorry to hear this...I hope she's at peace

[Blue_In_AK]

185. My sincere condolences.

[joanbarnes]

186. Speechless......deepest sympathy to you and all who love her.

[SoCalDem]

187. She was a beautiful person ..inside and out..she will be missed

[LiberalEsto]

188. My deepest condolences to you and your family

and remember, we are here for YOU if you need to vent, or need good vibes, or cyberhugs, or just to hang around.

[uppityperson]

189. Oh no. I am so sorry, loved that firefly post and am just so sorry.

[ChisolmTrailDem]

190. Oh my, Gabriel... I am so, so sorry for your loss...

We lost my stepson to suicide last September. Even so, I can't imagine what you must be feeling. All my best to you and your family. Hang in there, Gabriel, and please let us know if you need anything or just want to talk.

[herding cats]

191. I'm deeply sorry for your loss

My thoughts are with you.

[Worried senior]

192. I am very sorry for your loss

She was a beautiful person.

[angel823]

193. no words

Nothing we can say will help much, probably, but know we are here.

Gabriel, if your profile is up to date, I am close by. If you or your family need anything, please pm me.

Angel in Texas

[Fumesucker]

194. Such a beautiful last post

Fitting I think.

[Damansarajaya]

195. Deepest sympathies.

In these photos, she looks thoughtful and kind.

[Liberal_in_LA]

196. omg. so sad.

[louslobbs]

197. So sorry to hear this. Take care of yourself during this difficult time and remember to breathe.

This is just so sad.
Lou

[MannyGoldstein]

198. So sad.

Peace to you.

- Manny

[TygrBright]

199. Oh, Gabriel... so VERY sorry...

Some things you need to know, if you don't know already:

It was her decision. Whatever the specific brain disorder that made life so unbearable for her, it wasn't your "fault" or ANYONE's. It's a complex disease, and sometimes, like now, that fucker wins.

There are people who want to help you: Let them. Even though the pain is still raw and fresh and awful and you may want distance and only the most familiar loved ones, it's BECAUSE that pain is so awful that you and Terri's other dear ones need some help from professionals experienced with this situation. Please seek it out, and accept it.

Be with friends, be with loved ones all you can. Grieve. Do not let the shame and doubt and anger and all the other baggage that goes with suicide derail the process. No matter HOW she died, Terri has died, and you have the loss to deal with.

You have friends here. Terri's friends, your friends. Yeah, it's only an "online community," but you know what? The cool thing about online communities is that we're here, 24/7. A few keystrokes away. We're here during the sleepless nights, the empty times. Use us.

Finally-- this is a bit of wisdom passed on from a family member after her brother (a cousin of mine) killed himself: "It hurt too much for him to be himself here. It hurt too much for my love to reach him, maybe. Now that he's not here, I still have that love, it's all still here, and it's here because of him. He'd want me to do something positive with that love, since he couldn't. It's the best thing I can do for him."

Live.

Grieve.

Love.

respectfully,
Bright

[aikoaiko]

200. My condolences to you and everyone else who knew and loved her.

[IMG][/IMG]

[get the red out]

201. I am so sorry

I wish for healing for her friends and family.

[freshwest]

202. So sorry to hear this. No words I can say will be enough. Sorry is all I have.

[Squinch]

203. I am so sorry.

You and she are in my thoughts. I wish you peace.

[nashville_brook]

204. i am so incredibly sorry for your loss

[TxDemChem]

205. My condolences to you and your family

[AllenVanAllen]

206. my god, once again thank all of you so much.

the outpouring of love and support has touched me so deeply and made it possible for me to start to make it through this terrible loss. i can't thank all of you enough. i wanted to let everyone know we're going to have a visitation for Terri on Saturday the 17th from 2:00 pm to 5:00 pm at Santana Funeral Directors located at 401 Ssgt. Macario Garcia Drive, Houston TX 77011 ph. [phone]






everyone is welcome. thank you so much.

[Rider3]

207. My deepest condolences

She was a beautiful person.

[WheelWalker]

208. and the wheel turns

[struggle4progress]

209. .

hoping your memories of better times will comfort you

[KBlagburn]

210. My thoughts and prayers for you and the family

[rhett o rick]

211. My condolences. nm

[Starry Messenger]

212. (((hugs)))

I'm very sorry for your loss. Peace to you and your family.

[silvershadow]

213. I am so truly sorry for your loss. As a suicide survivor myself, I urge you to reach out

for support wherever you can. There are survivors groups all over the country, hopefully you can find one close. My thoughts are with you.

[Ohio Joe]

214. my condolences

RIP

[angstlessk]

215. I have no words...except she was a beautiful woman

k&R

[democrank]

216. I`m so very sorry.

RIP~

[JesterCS]

217. *hug* So Sorry for your loss n/t

[countryjake]

218. All of my sympathies to you, Gabriel

Peace to Terri

[Ilsa]

219. She was so lovely. My condolences to your family. nt

[pacalo]

220. I'm so, so sorry...

This is heartbreaking.

[Boomerproud]

221. Words cannot convey our sense of mourning for Terri

Gabriel, your two posts have already had a healing effect and you are a remarkable man for even posting in your time of loss. Please let all of DU help you.

[alsame]

222. Deepest condolences to

you and all who loved her

RIP Terri, you will be missed here

[Lisa0825]

223. I didn't personally know her or you, but I am so very sorry....

So sorry she was hurting, whatever the reason, and so sorry for the pain you are enduring now. I wish I could give you a hug for real.

((((((((((HUGS))))))))))

I wish there were something I could say that could help, but I know it's impossible. I hope that knowing so many people care is at least some small comfort to you.

[AAO]

224. I'm so sorry, Gabriel. Thank you, for letting us know.

[msanthrope]

225. I am so sorry for your loss. I wish you peace and calm. nt

[randys1]

226. Never see fireflies again without thinking of her, and I dont know her, new here...so sorry

[snacker]

227. Hugs to you...

I'm so sorry. Peace.

[Curmudgeoness]

229. How tragic! I am so sorry for your loss.

I really enjoyed her last post.....may fireflies light her way.

[calimary]

230. OMG! I just saw this. DAMN.

I can't tell you how sorry I am to hear this. I'm so sorry! Thank you for posting this so we know. After awhile when one doesn't see a post from them, one does start wondering. I'm so sorry. Be at peace, at last, Terri Lea. And Gabriel - you have all our prayers and sympathies. You do not mourn alone.

[xfundy]

231. The pain that exists in the mind dwarfs physical pain.

I've been there. I'm so sorry she couldn't go on and be there for you.

[Jefferson23]

232. Your beautiful wife, I am so sorry. n/t

[appal_jack]

233. Condolences to you, Gabriel.

Condolences to you, Gabriel. I am so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful last post onestepforward gave us all.

As Mary Mother Jones said long ago, "Pray for the dead and fight like hell for the living."

-app

[NRaleighLiberal]

234. .

[Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin]

235. How sad

My condolences to her family.

[Terra Alta]

236. sorry for your loss.

She was beautiful. May she rest in peace.

[go west young man]

237. My sincere condolences....

her photography is amazing. A little dedication to an artful spirit who has flown to the sky. Peace to you.

[ClusterFreak]

238. I am so terribly sorry for your loss.

Your tribute to your late wife is very moving and inspirational.

I hope you find peace in the days, months and years ahead.

[FourScore]

239. This is just too sad. I am so sorry for your loss Gabriel...

[renate]

240. That is so sad, and I am so very sorry

What a terrible loss, and I am so sorry for your pain as well as for hers.

[cordelia]

241. I am so very, very sorry.

[Autumn]

242. I'm so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful soul she was.

[BlancheSplanchnik]

243. I wish we could heal your pain....

Please seek out support and compassion. You need that now and for the long haul. I am so so sorry.

[senseandsensibility]

244. I am glad that you reached out to DU

There are many words of wisdom and comfort on this thread, most much more eloquent than anything I can add. I know that you are experiencing enormous, unimaginable pain. Please don't blame yourself. It's good that you are sharing your pain, and I hope that you find peace.

[Kaleva]

245. From now on, whenever I see fireflies, I'll think of onestepforward.

So very sorry for your loss.

RIP Terri.

[LeftyMom]

246. I'm so sorry for your loss. She was lovely.

If she had a cause she supported where you'd like donations sent in her honor, can you please let us know?

[Triana]

247. OMG. I am so sorry AVA.

She was beautiful. That long-exposure firefly post was one of my favorites! I shared it outside of DU because it was beautiful and fascinating.

My heart goes out to you.

[noiretextatique]

248. my deepest sympathies

may she rip

[ladyVet]

249. I'm so sorry. My thoughts with you and your family.

[AllenVanAllen]

250. all of you are wonderful

this is why terri loved her DU family so much. i am more moved and touched than my words can convey. thank you. thank you so much.






"You thinking of me a year before we met"

i have this pic on my work table in my studio and it always ticked the shit out of me.

[warrprayer]

251. Farewell onestepforward

and thanks for making this such a great place

[yaddle]

253. She was magic, she will be missed <3

<3

“I learned about the sacred art of self decoration with the monarch butterflies perched atop my head, lightning bugs as my night jewelry, and emerald-green frogs as bracelets.”

― Clarissa Pinkola Estés

[3catwoman3]

254. You speak so eloquently of the many ways your wife...

...touched your life, and what a special person you found her to be. To be able to do this at such a stressful time tells me that you must be an equally remarkable person. I hope you find the strength you need, both within yourself, and from those around you.

You may find people speaking of closure, and making suggestions about how to achieve it. Many of us who have adjusted to life after the loss of a beloved person feel that closure is an elusive and probably non-existent state. We do not "get over" such losses. Rather, you learn to adjust to a new existence. There will still be reasons to cherish your own life and to take joy in things, but perspective will be forever altered.

People will want to help, and will want to know how they can. Tell them not to be afraid to share their memories. People often hesitate to do this for fear of making you sad. Knowing the affection with which your wife is remembered by others who loved her can be helpful.

[meegbear]

255. .