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How do you know when it is time to give up driving? (Original Post) PumpkinAle Jul 2014 OP
When the doctor says so yeoman6987 Jul 2014 #1
Agreed Dyedinthewoolliberal Jul 2014 #12
There shouldn't be an age limit on driving. Mariana Jul 2014 #18
It is usually family members, neighbors and friends pipoman Jul 2014 #24
and this is serious....my father was driving until he crashed, and no one could find him... a kennedy Jul 2014 #2
This message was self-deleted by its author A HERETIC I AM Jul 2014 #8
An 82 year old unlicensed uninsured lady ALBliberal Jul 2014 #3
I'm not so sure it's just a matter of age. I've been with people in their 90's that are RKP5637 Jul 2014 #4
Honestly, I think everyone should have to take a drivers test when renewing. PowerToThePeople Jul 2014 #5
The difference is that younger drivers pipoman Jul 2014 #25
When you get lost in your own home town. nt truebluegreen Jul 2014 #6
That happened to my dad Freddie Jul 2014 #9
Mine too--he was 80-- truebluegreen Jul 2014 #10
My mom does that, but she's an excellent driver. Mariana Jul 2014 #20
That happened to a close friend of mine. One day she just parked her car in her driveway... Hekate Jul 2014 #21
That is a bright spot--while it lasts, alas. truebluegreen Jul 2014 #34
Paul Newman was racing until he was nearly 80. Gidney N Cloyd Jul 2014 #7
I knew my eyes were bad when I started to have parking lot fender benders. Warpy Jul 2014 #11
I almost got into a serious accident and knew it was my own fault. i not longer drive and my dog is jwirr Jul 2014 #13
Depends safeinOhio Jul 2014 #14
Well played aikoaiko Jul 2014 #35
When I can no longer drive a stick SheilaT Jul 2014 #15
Those of us with gout give up the stick pretty young (50's) Shrike47 Jul 2014 #26
colchicine, an old medicine sorefeet Jul 2014 #28
I understand that others may SheilaT Jul 2014 #32
My grandfather went to back out of the garage Mariana Jul 2014 #16
My mother was hit by a 95 year old who went through a stop light. pnwmom Jul 2014 #17
My mom was furious when she lost her license. eridani Jul 2014 #19
It's a shame everyone doesn't have public transportation. Mariana Jul 2014 #22
Where I live, most bus riders are punky kids. It's hard for seniors. Shrike47 Jul 2014 #27
Some of these people, if they have the wherewithal to do it, might raccoon Jul 2014 #23
My father failed to stop at the end of his street. He said he realized it as he was parking at the mulsh Jul 2014 #29
True story LynnTTT Jul 2014 #30
My father at almost 91 caused his own death by driving when he shouldn't have been. no_hypocrisy Jul 2014 #31
I've had that look on my face LWolf Jul 2014 #33
 

yeoman6987

(14,449 posts)
1. When the doctor says so
Fri Jul 11, 2014, 09:26 PM
Jul 2014

Until the US gets a handle on how to deal with Seniors not driving like free taxi service or something, it would be incredibly unfair to put an age limit on driving.

Dyedinthewoolliberal

(15,571 posts)
12. Agreed
Fri Jul 11, 2014, 11:35 PM
Jul 2014

if I give up the car in this mobile society and have to use public transportation it's no good. There is no useful mass transit except in a few large cities.

Mariana

(14,856 posts)
18. There shouldn't be an age limit on driving.
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 03:29 AM
Jul 2014

I could go for periodic road tests for everyone, not just seniors. As someone else said, there's no shortage of bad younger drivers. Maybe seniors should take them more frequently, because it's just a fact that response times and such deteriorate with age for most people. And of course there should be no charge for the tests.

 

pipoman

(16,038 posts)
24. It is usually family members, neighbors and friends
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 08:34 AM
Jul 2014

If the person is mid term on their dl renewal and live in their own housing. Many ccrc living arrangements do periodic evaluation of drivers. The ccrc I work for encourages all employees to watch for the warning signs of resident drivers being unable to continue driving and to report to case workers if we witness concerns.

a kennedy

(29,655 posts)
2. and this is serious....my father was driving until he crashed, and no one could find him...
Fri Jul 11, 2014, 09:30 PM
Jul 2014

eventually we did, and it was the last day he drove. He was 84 years old. We all laughed at his funeral saying, he was the best driver....NOT. I'm not sure when the older folks should quit driving..... it was heartbreaking for us to hear he died in some field.

Response to a kennedy (Reply #2)

ALBliberal

(2,340 posts)
3. An 82 year old unlicensed uninsured lady
Fri Jul 11, 2014, 09:42 PM
Jul 2014

Ran a red light and crashed into my 17 year old son. No one hurt but my car was totaled.
Quite frustrating.

RKP5637

(67,107 posts)
4. I'm not so sure it's just a matter of age. I've been with people in their 90's that are
Fri Jul 11, 2014, 09:46 PM
Jul 2014

far better drivers than those younger. Probably driver testing would be one way ...

 

PowerToThePeople

(9,610 posts)
5. Honestly, I think everyone should have to take a drivers test when renewing.
Fri Jul 11, 2014, 09:51 PM
Jul 2014

There are plenty of younger people that are poor drivers too.

 

pipoman

(16,038 posts)
25. The difference is that younger drivers
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 08:38 AM
Jul 2014

Can pass a driving test, they choose to drive poorly when they do.

Freddie

(9,265 posts)
9. That happened to my dad
Fri Jul 11, 2014, 10:18 PM
Jul 2014

He was 86. "I don't know how I ended up on Main St." and the only way he could have done that was to run a stop sign across a major intersection, thankfully not much traffic at the time. We got the keys from him soon after.

Mariana

(14,856 posts)
20. My mom does that, but she's an excellent driver.
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 03:46 AM
Jul 2014

She had a stroke and she fully recovered physically, but it affected the part of her brain that "navigates" I guess you could say. She gets lost very easily. All of her friends know about it and she doesn't hesitate to pull off and call them for help if she can't find their house or wherever it is she's trying to go.

Fortunately, where she lives all she has to do is go south until she gets to the coast, and the coast road takes her right home. She has a compass mounted in the car just for doing that.

Hekate

(90,674 posts)
21. That happened to a close friend of mine. One day she just parked her car in her driveway...
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 03:49 AM
Jul 2014

...and just never drove again. A few months prior to that she got lost on the road from Santa Barbara to Ashland Oregon, a journey she'd been making annually for over 20 years.

It was "mild to moderate" dementia. The only bright spot was her self-awareness. Too many people with dementia or failing eyesight simply refuse to turn over their car keys, and present a real hazard on the roads.

We helped her sell her car, and helped her move out of her home, and now she's in assisted living.

I hope I will remain as self aware.... The only thing is, as I told her neurologist when I accompanied her to an appointment, that getting lost is not new behavior for me, as I've had a rather poor sense of direction my whole life.

 

truebluegreen

(9,033 posts)
34. That is a bright spot--while it lasts, alas.
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 02:07 PM
Jul 2014

After getting lost, my father was aware enough to give up his keys. Later, he "forgot" and the issue was the source of a lot of anger and paranoia (which, unfortunately, goes with the territory of Alzheimer's).

Given the loss of independence that comes with not being able to drive, it is a very difficult thing for the elderly to do.

Gidney N Cloyd

(19,834 posts)
7. Paul Newman was racing until he was nearly 80.
Fri Jul 11, 2014, 10:05 PM
Jul 2014

Of course the other drivers made fun of how his left blinker was always on but still that's impressive.

Warpy

(111,255 posts)
11. I knew my eyes were bad when I started to have parking lot fender benders.
Fri Jul 11, 2014, 11:09 PM
Jul 2014

So I bought myself a moped for day trips on the theory I couldn't do much damage with one of those, and only drove my truck at 4 AM to all night groceries to stock up when few other people were on the road.

If I'd have taken one of my cats with me on any of those trips, I think the expression would be the same.

A transplant and a host of other surgeries have bought me reasonable eyesight. The dings on my car are from other people who don't see so good.

jwirr

(39,215 posts)
13. I almost got into a serious accident and knew it was my own fault. i not longer drive and my dog is
Fri Jul 11, 2014, 11:53 PM
Jul 2014

happy.

Shrike47

(6,913 posts)
26. Those of us with gout give up the stick pretty young (50's)
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 08:47 AM
Jul 2014

One day you're thinking how am I gonna do this? The pain of gout is impressive.

sorefeet

(1,241 posts)
28. colchicine, an old medicine
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 09:40 AM
Jul 2014

I had a flare up for over 2 solid months. Stupid, stupid, stupid doctors. This was real bad for way too long. Got on the internet and read that I could take one colchicine every hour until gout was gone. 4 hours later I was pain free and walking around. Took one more for good measure and it has never come back. Probably 7 years now. I was taking alluperinol and colchicine and the internet said to never ever take them together during an attack. My doc said make sure I took both. Quack. They are super cheap and they worked for me. A guy at work had the same problem. I gave him 5 pills and he said it was a miracle.

 

SheilaT

(23,156 posts)
32. I understand that others may
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 01:35 PM
Jul 2014

have some physical issue that makes it impossible to drive a stick.

For me, so far -- and I'm 65 -- it looks like it might be a very good benchmark to use.

I also think that we should all have to repass a driving test every few years, regardless of age.

Mariana

(14,856 posts)
16. My grandfather went to back out of the garage
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 03:17 AM
Jul 2014

and went forward instead. He must have hit the gas pretty hard, because he totaled the car and wrecked the back of the garage (he wasn't hurt at all). He kept saying he was going to get another car, but he didn't and he died a few months later, of natural causes. He was 87.

My father in law got into a collison when he was about 75 (no one was hurt) and he couldn't remember how it happened. He may have fallen asleep at the wheel. It freaked him out and he hasn't driven since. That was 10 or 12 years ago.

I wish my mother in law would stop driving, but she won't. Riding with her is a terrifying experience. She's 79.

pnwmom

(108,977 posts)
17. My mother was hit by a 95 year old who went through a stop light.
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 03:25 AM
Jul 2014

She was 65 and broke several ribs, and never healed quite right.

When she was 80 she realized she didn't have as good control as she should, and she put the car in the garage and never looked back.

I wish everybody was as realistic about driving as she was.

eridani

(51,907 posts)
19. My mom was furious when she lost her license.
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 03:37 AM
Jul 2014

That lasted about a week, and then she said "Well, you do have to think about other people." Losing independence is very, very hard.

Mariana

(14,856 posts)
22. It's a shame everyone doesn't have public transportation.
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 04:07 AM
Jul 2014

My great aunt Dot didn't miss a beat when she had to give up driving. She learned the bus and subway routes and went wherever she wanted to. Since she was no longer paying for gas, insurance, and maintenance on a car, she had money for cab fare when she didn't feel up to walking or the weather was bad.

Shrike47

(6,913 posts)
27. Where I live, most bus riders are punky kids. It's hard for seniors.
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 08:51 AM
Jul 2014

We can't take being pushed or jostled very well, and some of us have a problem stepping up to the bus. Being old isn't great.

raccoon

(31,110 posts)
23. Some of these people, if they have the wherewithal to do it, might
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 05:57 AM
Jul 2014

be able to hire someone like the guy in "Driving Miss Daisy."

Some older people can't drive safely, and many younger people need employment.
A win-win situation.

(And yes, I realize that such a job wouldn't provide a living, but the wages would help.)


mulsh

(2,959 posts)
29. My father failed to stop at the end of his street. He said he realized it as he was parking at the
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 09:50 AM
Jul 2014

local grocery market. He came home and called me and my brother and told us he was no longer going to be driving. He was 78 years old. He said what scared him was the thought that might only the first time he realized he did something stupid like that. I had a great uncle who did something similar years ago. It may run in the family.

LynnTTT

(362 posts)
30. True story
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 09:53 AM
Jul 2014

A friend in Maryland had an elderly mother who went to Florida every winter. He would drive her down in her car, but then she would drive herself home. One year he got a call from her on her way back. She was in Ohio. Turned out that the last few years when she started home, she would get on I-95 and at some point just following a car with a Maryland license plate. Worked for the first few years .

no_hypocrisy

(46,088 posts)
31. My father at almost 91 caused his own death by driving when he shouldn't have been.
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 10:08 AM
Jul 2014

We couldn't get him to stop. Just the opposite. He'd drive to Florida, stay one day, and drive back to Jersey. He'd drive to the middle of Pennsylvania for a restaurant that had "amazing" liver and onions. Stuff like that. I warnede him with one big accident, he'd lose the house he lived in for the past half century. He didn't believe it would happen.

His car had no airbags. His foot slipped off the brake and onto the accelerator. He rear-ended a van at a gas station. He totaled his car. He refused medical attention when offered. Got three tickets.

One week later, he complained that he had a severe back ache. (Not to me, to a neighbor)

While the neighbor went to get a heating pad at a drugstore, my father suffered a massive heart attack and managed to dial 9-1-1. It was too late.

The Point: Through a series of events, my father rear-ended a van and his chest hit the steering wheel or column and did not go to get medical help. Matter of fact, my siblings and I didn't know about this accident until we were in the ER and the neighbor told us. (Dad had several "fender-benders" and hid them from us.)

Because his chest suffered a trauma, his aorta became partially detached (aortic dissection/John Ritter died of this) and he bled slowly for a week and one of the common symptoms is a debilitating back ache.

And my father didn't understand how serious his condition was. But at age 91, he was in denial about several things.

Now for the punchline. The state DMV sent a letter to him this week, advising him that his driving privileges are about to be suspended because of the accident.

LWolf

(46,179 posts)
33. I've had that look on my face
Sat Jul 12, 2014, 01:40 PM
Jul 2014

whenever I've been a passenger in my mom's car...since I was a kid. Age makes it worse.

Why? She can't keep her adhd eyes and brain on the road, or hands on the wheel.

She's too busy talking to pay attention, and when she talks, she must make eye contact and large, expansive gestures.

I've spent too much time staring rigidly at the road in front of me, looking much like that dog, ignoring the attempts at eye contact and gesture, and constantly pointing out all the things on the road she's missing, until she gets offended and pissed.

When she drives alone, she doesn't have an audience, so it's better. She's 75.

The whole family generally rushes to claim driving privileges when she's going along.

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