Talking pineapple question on state exam stumps ... everyone!

[proud2BlibKansan]

Students across the state are still scratching their heads over an absurd state test question about a talking pineapple.

The puzzler on the eighth-grade reading exam stumped even educators and has critics saying the tests, which are becoming more high stakes, are flawed.

“I think it’s weird that they put such a silly question on a state test. What were they thinking?” said Bruce Turley, 14, an eighth-grader at Lower Manhattan Community Middle School.

“I thought it was a little strange, but I just answered it as best as I could,” said his classmate Tyree Furman, 14. “You just have to give it your best answer. These are important tests.”

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/talking-pineapple-question-state-exam-stumps-article-1.1064657#ixzz1sdYZ0o8l

Ken Jennings, 'Jeopardy!' champ, reacts to state test question about talking pineapple

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/opinion/ken-jennings-jeopardy-champ-reacts-state-test-question-talking-pineapple-article-1.1064776#ixzz1sdYuKzl6

The Hare and the Pineapple

by Daniel Pinkwater

In olden times, the animals of the forest could speak English just like you and me. One day, a pineapple challenged a hare to a race.

(I forgot to mention, fruits and vegetables were able to speak too.)

A hare is like a rabbit, only skinnier and faster. This particular hare was known to be the fastest animal in the forest.

“You, a pineapple have the nerve to challenge me, a hare, to a race,” the hare asked the pineapple. “This must be some sort of joke.”

“No,” said the pineapple. “I want to race you. Twenty-six miles, and may the best animal win."

"You aren't even an animal!" the hare said. “You're a tropical fruit!"

“Well, you know what I mean,” the pineapple said.


The animals of the forest thought it was very strange that tropical fruit should want to race a very fast animal.

"The pineapple has some trick up its sleeve," a moose said.

Pineapples don't have sleeves, an owl said

"Well, you know what I mean,” the moose said. "If a pineapple challenges a hare to a race, it must be that the pineapple knows some secret trick that will allow it to win.”

“The pineapple probably expects us to root for the hare and then look like fools when it loses,” said a crow. “Then the pineapple will win the race because the hare is overconfident and takes a nap, or gets lost, or something.”

The animals agreed that this made sense. There was no reason a pineapple should challenge a hare unless it had a clever plan of some sort. So the animals, wanting to back a winner, all cheered for the pineapple.

When the race began, the hare sprinted forward and was out of sight in less than a minute. The pineapple just sat there, never moving an inch.

The animals crowded around watching to see how the pineapple was going to cleverly beat the hare. Two hours later when the hare cross the finish line, the pineapple was still sitting still and hadn't moved an inch.

The animals ate the pineapple.

MORAL: Pineapples don't have sleeves


Beginning with paragraph 4, in what order are the events in the story told?

A switching back and forth between places

B In the order in which the events happen

C Switching back and forth between the past and the present

D In the order in which the hare tells the events to another animal


The animals ate the pineapple most likely because they were

A Hungry

B Excited

C Annoyed

D Amused

Which animal spoke the wisest words?

A The hare

B The moose

C The crow

D The owl

Before the race, how did the animals feel toward the pineapple?
A Suspicious

B Kindly

C Sympathetic

D Envious

What would have happened if the animals had decided to cheer for the hare?

A The pineapple would have won the race.

B They would have been mad at the hare for winning.

C The hare would have just sat there and not moved.

D They would have been happy to have cheered for a winner.

When the moose said that the pineapple has some trick up its sleeve, he means that the pineapple

A is wearing a disguise

B wants to show the animals a trick

C has a plan to fool the animals

D is going to put something out of its sleeve

[Brickbat]

1. That "story" looks like it was written by a seventh grader. WTF?

[proud2BlibKansan]

7. Probably the most bizarre test story I've ever read.

And I've read a lot of bizarre stories on tests.

[Fumesucker]

21. I agree that's it's humor and I used to listen to Daniel Pinkwater on NPR..

But that story and the idiot questions don't belong on a make-or-break test for kids..

These kids are in anything but a humorous state of mind for the most part when they take these tests and fucking with their heads with such an impenetrable set of questions is just ridiculous..

[Brickbat]

30. You know what's interesting? I re-read the story this morning as a short story -- not as a question

on a high-stakes test -- and found it funny. Putting a silly, semi-satirical story in a high-stakes test about reading comprehension is asking for trouble, I think. While we'd all like standardized tests to be interesting, this isn't the way to do it. Wacky goes too far.

[MattBaggins]

45. I found the story highly amusing

Some of the questions were not appropriate for that level nor as multiple choice.

I kind of liked the question of who had the wisest words but that can not be answered without at least a short essay to explain your opinion.

[proud2BlibKansan]

52. Teachers' paychecks are based on how well their students understand this story

and answer the ridiculous questions following it.

I don't fiind that very humorous at all.

[newspeak]

38. nah, might have been written by niall bush and milken

wow, that's some kind of test.

[Make7]

2. Is this supposed to explain why some people are backing Romney? ( n/t )

[surrealAmerican]

58. He IS that pineapple!

... and no, he doesn't have sleeves either.

[shraby]

3. Who in the hell would make up a stupid story like that then of all things think it's appropriate

to make into a series of test questions?? Where is a face-palm when it's needed??

[proud2BlibKansan]

9. Our standardized tests are full of stupid stories like this.

Our 4th graders have to read a story about a guy with a funky name none of them can pronounce who sees the moon and decides he wants to catch one of its rays. (yes, I know --> a moon has rays??) Anyhow he ends up jumping in a well and drowning.

Never fails at least one kid says "That is a really DUMB story!" And I say "Yes, I agree"

[sammytko]

41. Daniel Pinkwater - popular author would make up a stupid story like that!

http://www.pinkwater.com/

[Avalux]

4. This is great. It's inconsequential who or what raced the hare.

You could substitute anything for the pineapple and all the quesitons would still apply.

Brilliant actually.

[Luminous Animal]

5. Daniel Pinkerton has something to say about this...

http://blogs.wsj.com/metropolis/2012/04/20/daniel-pinkwater-on-pineapple-exam-nonsense-on-top-of-nonsense/

Metropolis: The pineapple thing…

So you’re calling because– Oh the pineapple thing! I thought you were calling because I’m this great author.

That’s why I originally wanted to call, and then this came up. Once again you’re dealing with this sort of absurd passage on a state test.

There was never all this attention before. Occasionally there would be some mention, every couple of years, that that quote has been appearing on those stupid tests — and you can quote me, stupid tests. There’s big to-do about it now since it ran in New York this past week. I’ve gotten a ton of emails from kids. One kid phoned me up. They had many comments ranging from, “What are you, crazy?” to “That was the funniest thing I ever saw on a test” to “These tests are stupid, aren’t they, Mr. Pinkwater.”

[Prometheus Bound]

6. The story is workable but some of the questions are very poor.

[jberryhill]

8. If you think that's wacky...

...some of the stuff that shows up on bar exams is only comprehensible to the insane.

[proud2BlibKansan]

15. Doesn't surprise me at all.

[jberryhill]

17. Hmmmm.....

Kinda inflicted that wound myself there...

[Ikonoklast]

31. I take it you aced the bar exam?

[jberryhill]

34. I was beat by the pineapple.

[Ikonoklast]

35. For that reply alone, I abase myself before you.

You just won the thread.


[IMG][/IMG]

[Dorian Gray]

63. For the win.

[DevonRex]

64. Naturally. After all, 3 years of law school precede it

along with thousands of hours of study and thousands of dollars in prep courses for the exam itself. No sane person could possibly hope to pass.

[jberryhill]

66. ...or 4 at night

[DevonRex]

68. I hear they're crazier

than the others. The quicker you make it through the more brains you make it out with. The trick is to wear one earplug at all times. At least that's what I think I heard.

[benld74]

10. How bout this one instead?,,,,,

If a chicken and a half
can lay an egg and a half
In a day and a half

How long would it take
a grasshopper
with a wooden leg
to kick all the seeds
out of dill pickle?

[RC]

11. This is the result of lowered expectations. How is this 8th grade material?

Give it time and Sesame Street will a required subject for high school graduation.

(Today's reading assignment.)
See Big Bird.
Big Bird is Yellow.
Yellow is a color.

(For extra credit.)
See Big Bird flap his yellow wings.

And to think people from other countries used to come here for an education.

[proud2BlibKansan]

12. That was my first thought as well.

Once kids get past 2nd grade, they're too old for stories where animals talk. Well, except for Animal Farm

[sammytko]

42. What about the current vampire, werewolf craze, should those be off limits also?

[proud2BlibKansan]

54. Never said anything about putting anything off limits

Please don't put words in my mouth.

It is my professional opinion, with a few exceptions, that past age 7, kids don't enjoy reading stories where animals talk.

[MattBaggins]

46. Now that is knee jerk bumper sticker slogan spouting

This story is tongue in cheek humor and too high for that grade level.

[freshwest]

13. Hilarious!

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

14. This sounds like my last job interview

and the type of dumb question HR people are trained to ask.

I don't think I got that job.

[Bozita]

16. A contract to test every schoolkid in a state is very profitable. - Discuss in 25 words or less.

[proud2BlibKansan]

18. I can do it in three words

Follow. The. Money.

[adamuu]

19. But, there was an owl in the story, and he spoke the words of the moral of the story, verbatim.

The owl is the wisest. It's kind of a meta-joke about stories with morals, but that's clearly the best answer.

I don't know why Ken Jennings said "there was no owl".

[CBGLuthier]

39. I noticed it too

I think this question is an OK example. It is not that bad. Literal minded people will struggle.

[girl gone mad]

53. I think there are two different versions of the story floating around.

One involves toothpaste and ninjas, too.

[muriel_volestrangler]

60. You can easily argue the owl was too stupid to recognise a figure of speech

If the owl meant "pineapples don't have sleeves" as a serious point, then it's dumb. If it meant it as a joke, then it's (subjectively) a poor joke, and not 'wise'.

Part of the problem is that the piece is nonsense; and thus designed to be slightly incomprehensible. It's not suitable for a multiple choice comprehension test.

[DCBob]

22. So where are the answers?

Even if you could look past the adsurbity of it all its a poor test because the answers are subjective.

[proud2BlibKansan]

26. They never give an answer key for these tests

So we'll never know for sure.

[Motown_Johnny]

23. I don't see the problem

Reading comprehension should not depend on the quality of the story. The fact that it is a stupid story just makes the question a little harder.

The answers seem obvious to me.


The story is told in the order the events happen.

The animals were annoyed with the pineapple after being tricked into rooting for it.

The Hare was the only one not fooled and therefore spoke the wisest words (although wisdom can be subjective, this is the only question I don't like).

The animals were suspicious of the pineapple.

They would have been happy that they cheered for a winner.

"Trick up your sleeve" means planning to fool.



Why is any of this an issue?

[Junkdrawer]

28. You missed the third question. The "correct answer" is The Owl.

Last edited Sat Apr 21, 2012, 10:13 AM - Edit history (1)

The owl's only words in the story were the story's moral: Things are usually just as they seem.

[Motown_Johnny]

44. I can see that

but I did say that wisdom is subjective and that is the one question I have a problem with.


The idea that "a pineapple doesn't have sleeves" is wisdom seems rather far fetched, but I do see your point.


The Hare was correct in everything he said so I can still argue that he is equally wise, but that is just one point of view.

[sammytko]

29. Agree. Seemed pretty straight forward to me

Why should a story have to make sense? It's fiction. Free your mind. I thought it was cute and funny.

[Retrograde]

50. Neither do I

It's a test of reading comprehension: can you answer the questions based on the text? They're all in the story.

[girl gone mad]

56. How were the animals tricked into rooting for the pineapple?

That would imply that the pineapple had something up its sleeve and the moral of the story is explicitly stated to be the opposite.

There are multiple correct possible answers as to why the animals ate the pineapple.

[Motown_Johnny]

71. even if they tricked themselves then they were still tricked

[hobbit709]

24. No more improbable than any other fable going all the way back to Aesop.

[Saokymo]

25. I like that story!

It's no more stupid than the notion of standardized tests in the first place. Maybe that's the point the author was trying to make in a roundabout way.

[Junkdrawer]

27. Oh, no. There's no organized effort to dumb-down America...

Perish the thought.

[Taitertots]

32. The Animals ate the Pineapple because...

They know it doesn't have anything up it's sleeve. At least that is what I get from the story.

1.B
2.A But the real answer is that they ate it because they knew it didn't have anything up it's sleeve.
3.B The Moose
4.A
5.D
6.C

[MattBaggins]

48. This is why the story but more so the questions didn't belong

The animals ate the pineapple because they were hungry... Why else do animals eat

The owl was the wisest... Sometimes a cigar is just cigar

How they would have felt if they had cheered for the rabbit is D but is a stupid question

[Godhumor]

33. I meet Daniel Pinkwater when I was a child

Great local author who writes very funny books for children. I honestly don't have a problem with the story, but I think it would be more appropriate for a written response question than multiple choice.

[DCBob]

36. Why should we assume a pineapple cannot run in a world where fruits and vegetables can talk?

The author asks questions that require applying practical logic to an impractical illogical scenario. I give the author an 'F'.

[flvegan]

37. 26 miles in 2 hours? That's one rapid rabbit!

[FarCenter]

40. It's fiction -- and fiction is bunk

They had better get used to it. Later, they may be forced to read some incomprehensible crap about the teenage angst of some preppie kid from the east coast. Just as weird as talking pineapples.

[janx]

61. Fiction is not bunk. n/t

[FarCenter]

69. Reading comprehension should be tested on practical material, e.g. IRS Pub 17 or MA law on residency

[petronius]

43. I read it as a pro-bullying story. The pineapple, different from every other character

and not even a real animal, makes an absurd claim to get some positive attention and be part of the crowd for once. When the claim doesn't pan out the other animals respond with violence, and the moral is that "pineapples" never really have any special characteristics anyway...

[Marrah_G]

47. Did Sarah Palin write that question...........

[rucky]

49. This comment from "RetiringTeacher" explains it...

Retiring teacher 07:57 AM
Apr 21, 2012
This test passage is designed to find out if teachers cheat. With such confusing questions, classrooms or groups of children that answer the questions the same way will cast suspicion on the teachers proctoring the test. A wide variety of answers would be expected from all testing groups, regardless of ability. This is not one of the passages that would be used in actual scoring.


Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/talking-pineapple-question-state-exam-stumps-article-1.1064657#ixzz1siFhiJIU

[girl gone mad]

57. If true, it's completely inappropriate..

to confuse and frustrate kids with garbage questions. There are better ways to determine if cheating has occurred.

[mathematic]

51. If more of our fiction had this spirit of whimsy the world would be a better place

The hardest question is why the animals ate the pineapple but the answer is right in the story. No tricks! Why does anything eat anything? Because it's hungry. The question's hard precisely because we're all trained to think like the moose.

[MattBaggins]

55. It's the multiple choice questions that are awful

This little story would be great if...
1. Assign as homework reading.
2. Have the students write short answer to the questions.
3. Discuss those answers in class the next day.

As multiple choice questions on an SAT it fails miserably.

[janx]

62. It looks like a basic logic and comprehension question,

based very loosely on Aesop's "The Tortoise and the Hare."

It has to do with logic, suspicion, and assumptions. I actually like it!

[UnrepentantLiberal]

65. This country is screwed.

[Tyrs WolfDaemon]

67. There is a 'deep hidden meaning' in this story that no one seems to notice

If you take this and read it upside down, backward and through the wrong end of a microscope, you will see that it must be related to the Great Gatsby. The pineapple is obviously the green light and Gatsby is a talking whale. There is some confusion as to the type of whale (I think he is an Orca and don't give me that Orca's aren't whales they're dolphins stuff)

That's my take on it.

[janx]

70. hahahaha!