Did this mom go too far with Facebook punishment?

[apples and oranges]

AKRON -- Denise Abbott just wanted her daughter to learn a lesson about what not to do on Facebook. So, she created a photo of her daughter that neither will ever forget.

Denise Abbott believes that parents have to adapt to the changing times and sometimes that includes creative discipline.

The Akron mother created a Facebook profile picture showing her 13-year-old daughter, Ava, with a red "X" across her mouth, followed by the words "I do not know how to keep my (mouth shut). I am no longer allowed on Facebook or my phone. Please ask why. My mom says I have to answer everyone that asks."

More than 30 people responded with inquiries as to why the picture had been created, and Denise said Ava is writing back to each person.

http://www.wkyc.com/news/article/242679/6/Poll-Did-Akron-mom-go-too-far-with-Facebook-punishment

I think the punishment was fine.

[The Wielding Truth]

1. I think it is just teaching responsibility to her young daughter. She is accountable for her words.

She is obviously a minor and what she says on line could be dangerous to her privacy. We should all try to be cautious about what we post. It is difficult when we are passionate about something.

[southernyankeebelle]

2. Sometimes a parent has to do what they have to do.

[leftynyc]

3. I agree - the punishment fits the situation

I must say, it's pretty creative on mom's part.

[HappyMe]

4. I think it's a good punishment.

[atheous]

5. she might still be a virgin

And if so there's that active volcano in Mexico she could be tossed into. By golly that would teach some REAL old fashioned values she wont soon forget.

[seabeyond]

17. what a ridiculous post. and welcome to du. nt

[Kalidurga]

6. I think the mom did the right thing.

Too many parents aren't willing to actually teach their children how to behave. It's hard to blame the parents, because they don't have a lot of support systems in our society. Like this mom, she will probably take some heat for the way she is handling this. It is an appropriate lesson, I won't even say punishment, because it isn't really punishment. And what makes this even better is Ava's friends may also learn a lesson, hopefully anyway. So, bravo for the mom being brave and bravo even to the girl for understanding what her mother is trying to teach her.

[geardaddy]

7. I don't see anything wrong with it.

[Texasgal]

8. This is waaaay better

than shooting up the laptop with a gun!

[teddy51]

9. My thoughts are that it is a little over the top. She has embarrassed her daughter, whether she

meant to or not. I think she should have handled it in a private fashion. I say fine, ban her from Face book and take away her phone, but don't publicly embarrass her.

[laundry_queen]

13. I agree. I always have a problem with

shaming as a punishment. But it's still better than shooting up a laptop.

[Not Me]

16. I agree.

The parent has every right to restrict the child from the computer, even shut down the facebook and cell accounts altogether.
Buy why humiliate the child?

[TorchTheWitch]

44. I agree - humiliation is painful and can last a life time

Public shaming was one of my own mother's tactics, and it's badly effected me emotionally throughout my life. Did it work to make me obedient? Oh hell yes. But it stifled me and created emotional problems I still suffer from.

[polichick]

10. Sort of reminds me of people hanging peed-upon bed sheets outside...

...in order to humiliate the kid who wet the bed. Public humiliation isn't the way I'd go.

[Brickbat]

11. I think this is so much not a news story.

[loyalsister]

12. Social humiliation as punishment?

Seems a lot like putting someone in the stocks or forcing them to wear a red A. It's a twisted way for mom to get her laughs IMO.

[proud2BlibKansan]

43. I agree

This is gross.

[Liquorice]

48. Agree. The mother is a bully. No wonder so many kids are bullies at school. They

are being bullied at home. And from all the positive replies to the mother's unacceptable behavior, it looks like many people think bullying is great discipline. Humans, we are doomed.

[Iris]

14. Are you kidding me? I can't believe how many people on here think this is ok.

Punishment aside, putting a picture up on Facebook or anywhere else on the internet is not something to be taken lightly. It's possible that this picture could follow this child around for quite some time and that's not something a responsible parent should take lightly.

[apples and oranges]

18. I didn't think about that

I hope the picture isn't around when she's applying for college or a job!

[Iris]

25. It's not even legal for kids under a certain age to be on sites like Facebook

There are federal laws about this.

[Warren Stupidity]

29. actual it is legal for the kid to be on the site as long as the parent has lied about the kids age.

And the law-breaker would be facebook, not the child (or it seems, the parent.)

[Iris]

30. Well, yes. But it would take the parents lying about their age.

Or, I suppose some kids under 13 can subtract well enough to come up withe a fake birthday on their own!

[Warren Stupidity]

31. its the parents

http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/11/03/why-parents-lie-to-let-kids-join-facebook/

[butterfly77]

15. No.

[Renew Deal]

19. I can't believe the mother would take a red X to the kids mouth

[gratuitous]

20. Probably inappropriate for a 13-year-old

But it would be totally appropriate for some other people. Who, you may ask? ♫♪I've got a little list!♪♫

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

21. This is news?

Jesus H Christ, who the fuck cares?

[redgreenandblue]

22. I think it is reckless.

The internet is not a toy. The mother obviously understands that as little as the daughter.

[Iris]

26. Exactly.

[Lawlbringer]

23. I'm only 27, but I remember the days

when instead of a red x over my mouth in an image, it was a red handprint on the side of my freaking face lol

[LaurenG]

24. At least she didn't take the computer out back and shoot it.

Parenting is not easy and I don't have anything else to add.


For reference: http://fox4kc.com/2012/02/10/father-shoots-daughters-computer-over-facebook-post/

[Warren Stupidity]

27. Public shaming and humiliation, how quaint.

No, sorry, this is not good parenting.

[atheous]

28. it could be a LOT worse

Around these parts we regularly witness parents and guardians beating kids with belts and whatever else they can lay their hands on then curse the kids with language to make a prison guard blush...
I hate to say this but this kid should be counted as lucky.

[frogmarch]

32. The mother disgusts me.

How is publicly humiliating one's child appropriate? In my opinion, it's never okay.

The mother could have disciplined her daughter by not letting her use Facebook and the phone, without telling whole world about it. The mom's a shmuck.

[piratefish08]

33. there's discipline and there's humiliation. this crossed a line.

[Common Sense Party]

34. Now she needs to work on the girl's atrocious grammar.

[flamingdem]

35. Sounds like they BOTH have behavioral problems

And an intense need for public attention to their personal foibles, so they must be in hog heaven now

[stevenleser]

36. Pictures and Videos on the internet are FOREVER. This is a permanent punishment in some respects.

I agree with others who wrote that public humiliation and shaming are terrible tools for a parent to employ against their child. In this case, the photo will follow that person around for the rest of their life, forever. As long as they live, periodically someone is going to find out about the picture and ask them about it.

Horrible parental mistake.

[Bake]

37. Everybody's ragging on the dad who shot the laptop.

Geez, he didn't shoot it while she was HOLDING IT! C'mon, people!



Bake

[Warren DeMontague]

38. I'm not sure why this is considered a "news" story.

Ooh, Facebook! Ooooh, naughty kids and technology and "parents cracking' down!!!"

Meanwhile, we have millions of gallons of radioactive cesium leaking into the pacific ocean every day. Maybe if it involved Facebook and a "tiger mom", the press might give half a shit.

[phleshdef]

39. Unnecessary humiliation. What a sick fucking woman. Just ground her.

Shame discipline is sick and vile. Talking back to your parents does NOT warrant it. Anyone who thinks otherwise doesn't deserve to have children.

[Quantess]

40. Like mother, like daughter.

The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, as the saying goes.

[KurtNYC]

41. the daughter will just go to Twitter

and evade her parents like every other teen in America did 6 months ago.

[fishwax]

42. I don't see the point in public/cyber humiliation as a parenting tool

[Liquorice]

49. Yep. It's cyber-bullying. nt

[RainDog]

45. public humiliation is always a positive!

I'm sorry, but this girl said something rude to her mom so her mom posts a picture and tells everyone the daughter has to explain?

I would not want to know that woman.

[AmazingSchnitzel]

46. Mother disciplines daughter with words - News @ 11

What makes the news cycle is silly at best...

[Liquorice]

47. Another parent trying to get attention at the expense of her kid. Pathetic. nt

[Butterbean]

50. I'm sorry, I don't think the punishment fits the crime at all. This mother went too far.

The girl talked back to her mother, in person. She did not cyber bully someone or post inappropriate sexually explicit content on the internet, the ONLY two circumstances I can think of that would warrant such an extreme reaction on the part of the mother.

Teenagers mouth off. It happens. You take away the phone, you take away the computer, you ground them. Fine. This, however, was uncalled for.